"Remember Sloan?" I jerk my head to the side and Kerry-Anne giggles, releasing my arm.
"Yeah! Sorry, I was excited to see you; I didn't realize you were going somewhere."
"We have a quick stop to make, want to meet at the fountain soon?" She smiles up at me and nods before wrapping her arms tightly around my waist and following the stream of people toward the entrance of the building.
The fountain. I won't let him take me anywhere until I've had one last talk with Kerry-Anne; arms hanging loosely in the cool water, our minds on our assignments, our feet dangling over the rim. I want to people-watch with her one more time. I need to hear her giggle and see her radiant smile before Rush takes me away from this place.
I only have one demand. Sloan must come with us. I simply won't leave without him.
Hear that Rush? I won't. So…take us both, or leave me the hell alone.
CHAPTER 16
I didn't attend college; not even one single day of higher education, but it doesn't take someone smarter than me to read the expression on Rush's face when we finally stumble back into the meeting room with the oval hole. Rush stands in the middle of it, glaring at us both as we slowly close the heavy door and stare between him, Carlson, Niles and Edith.
You heard me, didn't you?
Obviously. Sit.
I do as Rush has told me, walking with Sloan to join the other three, but I don't sit down right away. Standing on the step I'm almost exactly the same height as Rush is. I feel like an equal this way, so I remain upright with my feet slightly parted, digging my toes unconsciously into the cool ground below them, with my hands held as relaxed as possible by my sides.
Well? I stare at him, waiting for the cherry on top of his demented ice cream sundae.
It's Niles who clears his throat and speaks first, "Welcome back, Piper, dear. There's only one other thing we felt was worthy of discussion. Though, really," he pauses to look at Rush with a stony expression, "I'm not sure it's relevant any longer."
I nod at him, but still refuse to sit. Sloan wiggles nervously at my feet, with his legs crossed and his hands lying in his lap. He wants to be anywhere other than here, which is my thought exactly.
"Piper, Sloan…we are going to break a rule in here today and I ask you not to discuss this conversation with any friends. Do you understand?" Edith's voice is soft, but her words firm. Both Sloan and I nod at her.
"Sit," Rush says, just as he had in my mind.
With a tilt of my chin, I widen my stance and cross my arms over my chest, aware that I'm defying him in front of the group, and making it clear that I don't care. His eyes flash at me but instead of lecturing me, he smiles. It's empty, and part of me wonders if it’s a threat.
"Fine," he waves his hand at me casually before sitting opposite from the rest of us, his legs crossed at the ankle, leaning backwards against the cold floor with his hands. When he nods at Edith, she sighs deeply and locks eyes with me.
"Something rather unique happened on your last Assignment, Piper. Since you were already aware of the fact that this case would be scrutinized, that shouldn't surprise you. But honestly, what we saw surprised us." Edith waves as Niles and Carlson before returning her gaze to me once again.
I promise - I'm going to scream if anyone says the word 'unique' again. Rush chuckles softly as I grit my teeth against the compulsion to do just that. Ignoring us both, Edith continues talking.
"It seems that you and Sloan went on assignment…together."
"Huh?"
Sloan stands and raises his hands to his hips, just as confused as I am. "What does that mean?" he asks.
"What were the names of your Assignments?" she asks, her face flushed. I'm not sure if its excitement or fear that lights her eyes.
"Um," I pause to look at Sloan.
"Remember, I said we were breaking a rule today, Piper. It's okay. What was your Assignment's name?" Edith presses gently.
"Her name was Jessica Levy."
Sloan inhales sharply and grips my arm so suddenly that it makes me jump. I catch a smile on Rush's face as I turn to look at Sloan who has scrambled to his bare feet.
He's staring down at me, his pale blue eyes large and round, his expression one of wonder. "Mine was Cole…Cole Manning," he says breathlessly.
***
Several things happen at once. I finally unlock my knees and sit down hard enough on the step to bruise, if bruising in the after-life was possible - which it's not. Sloan is demanding answers from Carlson while Rush is standing in the center of the room again, listening to an upset Niles while watching me over his shoulder.
I'm stunned into silence as I think about everything we were taught in Training and anything before or after that. Not once had I heard of friends from the Station being simultaneously deported on cases, into people that knew each other. I mean, I guess it could happen, it just seemed unreal. Then again - everything since the summer after I graduated was a little unreal.
The haze that has distracted me from the conversations in the room lifts when I hear Niles raise his voice. "This is not what we agreed on, Andurush. We are talking about people here…real people. Not pets." Niles stands with his arms straight, his hands loosely fisted.
Rush pats the older man on the shoulder, effectively zapping him hard enough that I see Niles flinch. I'm unsure whether he intended on hurting him, or if the touch was just a way to calm my upset Intake Specialist down. As the two men step back from each other and Rush strides toward Sloan with a less than friendly expression on his face, I finally snap like a weathered branch.
Jumping to my feet again, I scream as loudly as my vocal chords can handle, "I can't take this anymore, I can't! I didn't ask for this, for any of it! Stop screwing around and tell me what's going on! What the hell is going on?!"
My eyes start doing the funny thing they do when I get upset like this: they leak. Firmly locking my quivering jaw in place, I refuse to allow any other part of my body to betray me. The tears may be flowing freely down my hot cheeks, but I ignore them. I don't even wipe them away. Otherwise the rest of me will realize I am indeed crying and will join in on the party.
Everyone turns around slowly to stare at me. The fact that no one is speaking just upsets me more, so I do my best impression of an eighteen year olds temper-tantrum. I stomp. I flail my arms madly. I wail, I holler. I scream profanities. I double over and curse at the always cool, mysterious ground. I stand upright and point my finger at everyone in the room while my mouth spews a garbled string of curses matching the spastic gestures of my hands. I'm shaking so badly I think I might fall over, but before I do, I decide to finish my tirade by shoving my hand up once more, displaying a solitary slender middle finger for the group to see.
And then - I bolt. But I don't even make it to the door before Rush's long arms wrap around me from behind and effortlessly lift me from the ground. I squeal in anger, attempting to kick the first soft part of his body my feet connect with. But his stance is too wide, and I'm only able to flail my legs awkwardly in the air.
Stop this now, child. Enough!
He's called me a child again. I relax until his arms do the same, and then with a quick jerk of my hand I strike at his face behind my head. He grunts, but still does not release me. I almost cry out from the sting that spreads along my palm. I'm most certain the slap hurt me more than it did him. His electrical aura engulfs me as I thrash in his arms.
"Let go! Let go of me!" I scream.
Sloan is yelling, but he sounds far away. Arching my back, I struggle to make space between us, but Rush simply won't budge. His arms are hard as steel, his hands clamped around me in a death grip. He won't let go. And I can't fight him off. After what seems like hours, I slump against him, more exhausted than I am pissed.
Gently, as if he's afraid I might shatter into a million pieces, Rush lowers me to the ground. He doesn't fully release his grip on me, not immediately. He waits until my heart beat slows and my legs stop shaking and then leaves only his fing
er tips on my arms as I breathe in deeply. Ashamed, I'm afraid to turn around and look at him or the others, especially Sloan.
He called me a child. Because I had truly acted like one.
I'm sorry. I whisper the thought to him, knowing he would pick it up.
Nothing. There's no response, and I realize he's not touching me anymore either. I pivot slowly on my bare feet, turning around until my side faces him. Staring at the ground, I compare the size of my small feet to his larger ones. He wiggles his big toe, and my head snaps up to see him smiling down at me.
"Do you feel better?" he asks quietly.
"Actually. Yes, yes I think I do," I say under my breath.
I peer up at him, ignoring the blonde hair that had gotten mussed up and is now draped across my face like a thick curtain. The left side of Rush's face is glowing red and I bite down on my lower lip, regretting the slap. He had restrained me, but hadn't actually injured me, yet I had reacted by practically setting one side of his face on fire.
Rush reaches out and takes my left hand, the one I had slapped him with, and rubs his thumb along my palm. The pain that throbs there ebbs away until all that's left is a dull ache. I blink at him, and he raises his jet-black eyebrows in response.
How'd you do that?
There is much that I can do, Piper. I simply want to show you the world beyond this one. I don't want to take you away from your friends forever. You are more like me than you realize. And I only want you to see that. I want to share the beyond with you.
CHAPTER 17
I sit in a sobering silence on the rim of the blue fountain as Kerry-Anne chats on and on about her last few cases, stopping only long enough to catch her breath and glance around us if she has something to say that she considers private. She's bubbly, more than she ever has been at the Station. Being a Volunteer has been good for her.
Nodding in all the right places, and keeping a smile plastered on my face, I let my mind wander to my time spent here. I had only been on three cases, and not once did I feel completely confidant in my abilities. Not completely. And then there was my time spent in the Ones building. It was rewarding, and I missed the children, but it drained me. I would never be able to stay there indefinitely, as the other Ones staff had obligated to. Being able to accept the self-inflicted death of a child would be something I could never do without spiraling down into my own depression. Obviously I wasn't meant to be there forever.
And now there was this 'seer' thing. The Mentors had unanimously agreed that it would be unfair for me to return to Volunteering. I was crushed at their words. I was gutted from the inside out. And I wasn't ready to move on and leave my friends just as I was getting to know them. Rush had changed everything. He brought to the surface things in me that I didn't even know existed, like he peeled back my skin and studied me with a microscope. Every fiber of my being wants to stay here. But to do what, exactly? As much as I love the fountain, I couldn't sit here forever.
Or can I?
"Piper?" Kerry-Anne's voice is low, soothing, and when I look over at her, she's staring hard at my features.
"I'm sorry, Kerry-Anne. There's something I need to tell you." I brace my arms against the rim, taking a deep breath while Kerry-Anne wiggles into a more comfortable position.
"Okay, anything," she says happily, but still with a serious expression on her face.
"I'm leaving." I said it bluntly on purpose. I can't stand the thought of explaining it all to her. It feels sort of like ripping off a band-aide…it just needs to be done quickly.
"Leaving? You already have your next Assignment? But you just got back, didn't you?" she asks me with large, brown eyes. They were the sort of eyes you would expect to see from a startled doe, not a girl as tiny as she was.
I turn around so that I'm facing her with my whole body, folding my legs into a pretzel shape. Slight lines crease on her forehead as I take one of her petite hands in mine. The moment we touch I feel waves of energy leave me and pass into her, like we created a bridge between us.
With a sigh, I smile my best smile and squeeze her hands gently. "No, honey. I'm leaving the Station. And I don't know for how long, but I will be back."
Slowly she blinks, as if processing my words a few dozen times. "Leaving?" her voice squeaks, barely above a whisper.
I nod. "Yes, but I will come back, you understand that, right?"
Her chin trembles as she whispers, "Where are you going?"
"I don't know." It was an honest answer, and I didn't want to lie to her.
Her hands jerk from mine and I'm knocked slightly backwards as she launches her much smaller body into my lap, wrapping her thin arms tightly around my neck. She doesn't cry, at least not then. But I sense the emotion bubbling up below the surface.
"It's okay. I'll be back before you know it, just watch."
"You better be," she says as she stands up abruptly and steps away from me, her chin beginning to pucker as she struggles to hold back the trembles. "You're my best friend." She rushes off, and I quickly lose her in the crowd.
You're my best friend too, Kerry-Anne. I haven't had a best friend in a long time. Not since Bree. My eyes well up at the thought of her, but it isn't guilt I feel as I remember Bree's soft face and always present smile…it is love. And I have the same love for Kerry-Anne. Some friends come and go, but the best never really leave the heart. I know I'll take a piece of both of them with me, regardless of where I end up.
***
I stand before the closed door oddly relaxed. Sloan is beside me, holding tightly to my hand. Though I wasn't sure how much influence I truly commanded, I insisted I would not leave without Sloan, and though obviously irritated with the idea, Rush finally agreed. He's getting two for the price of one - that can't be bad, right?
Niles stands on my left with his older and wrinkled hand resting comfortably on my shoulder, as if it had been there forever as an extension of myself. I reach up and grip it, feeling the roughness of his skin beneath mine. I daren’t look at him; my tear ducts can't handle it.
Pushing carefully on the door, Niles leans forward until the heavy wood swings inward; practically blinding me with bright white light. It burns from beyond like a flame, temporarily blurring my vision. How anyone could possibly see in it, I have no clue. But soon a tall figure comes out of the light, stopping just inside the glowing room. Rush. His eyes pierce mine as he smiles warmly, extending a hand for me to take.
In a panic I half-hug Niles, afraid to let go of Sloan for just one moment. I'm almost sure that something sinister will reach out from the blinding room and drag me away. The horror-movie lover in me screams, "Don't go into the light! Stay away from the light!"
But I will. I know I will. I'm going to walk through this doorway and leave the Station behind me because I have wanted to know more the instant I arrived. And, as Rush has ensured; I'd return after our journey the same Piper I was today, though perhaps a bit more knowledgeable and Seer-like. I still don't quite understand what that means, but the Mentors, aside from Niles of course, were excited for me. I'm getting to do something all of them had dreamed about for decades. I was leaving…to see what lies beyond.
"Piper," Niles says as he hugs me close, "I want you to follow your dreams - follow your heart. But please, don't forget about us. Return if you can. Okay?" I nod against his shoulder, the worn argyle sweater vest softly scratching the underside of my chin.
"I'll be back. I promised, remember?" We release and I step forward, reaching my left hand out to Rush's extended one. He waits patiently, knowingly.
This is tough for me. It's so hard to leave them.
You will return. You said so, yourself.
As I move further across the threshold, my right hand is met with resistance and I glance over my shoulder to see Sloan standing firmly in the same spot. He hasn't moved. Not one inch.
"Sloan?" As soon as his name leaves my lips, a single tear trickles down his cheek.
"I-I can't, Piper," he says quietly.
I'm blocked from his mind. As I stand in the light, I see only with my eyes. His fingers begin to loosen around my own, but I clamp down on him harder still.
"No! Please, please come with me!"
"I can't. I'll wait for you here," he says as Rush moves us backwards deeper into the room, further away from the door. As his arm slips around my waist, Sloan's fingers slide off mine.
He's gone! No!
He cannot come with us, Piper Willow. Only a true Seer can move into the beyond. If he passes through this doorway, he can never return to the Station with you. I told him this. And yes, I blocked it from you. I'm sorry. He cannot come.
"Wait!" I scream as Niles puts an arm around Sloan's sagging shoulders, and watch in horror as they step away from the door that is now slowly closing. Just before it shuts me away from them, Sloan lifts a hand and presses it on top of his heart. It is the last thing I see before the brilliance swallows me whole.
I'm pulled apart, cell by cell and thrown together again, all with Rush's arm firmly around my waist, holding me to him as if we are twirling around a dance floor. I feel everything inside me as it expands and then retracts, separating and then reattaching to my being. Pain does not begin to describe the feeling.
There is nothing below, nothing above…just bright, empty space and my cells spinning wildly around Rush's as the light heaves us onward. Where it takes me, I don't know. I don't remember.
It's just the two of us and the light…jettisoning us into the beyond.
The End of Book 2
DYING to RETURN
The Station - Volume 3
I must be dying…am I dying?
Piper Willow, you have already died.
Dying to Remember (The Station #2) Page 12