29 Three Men and a Maid

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29 Three Men and a Maid Page 11

by Unknown


  “Well, I really wanted to see Sir Mallaby.”

  “My father has been called away on important business to Walton Heath. Cannot I act as his substitute?”

  “Do you know anything about the law?”

  “Do I know anything about the law!” echoed Sam, amazed. “Do I know—! Why, I was reading my Widgery on Nisi Prius Evidence when you came in.”

  “Oh, were you?” said Billie interested. “Do you always read on the floor.”

  “I told you I dropped my pen,” said Sam coldly.

  “And of course you couldn’t read without that! Well, as a matter of fact, this has nothing to do with Nisi—what you said.”

  “I have not specialised exclusively on Nisi Prius Evidence. I know the law in all its branches.”

  “Then what would you do if a man insisted on playing the orchestrion when you wanted to get to sleep?”

  “The orchestrion?”

  “Yes.”

  “The orchestrion, eh? Ah! H’m!” said Sam.

  “You still haven’t made it quite clear,” said Billie.

  “I was thinking.”

  “Oh, if you want to think!”

  “Tell me the facts,” said Sam.

  “Well, Mr. Mortimer and my father have taken a house together in the country, and for some reason or other they have quarrelled, and now Mr. Mortimer is doing everything he can to make father uncomfortable. Yesterday afternoon father wanted to sleep, and Mr. Mortimer started his orchestrion just to annoy him.”

  “I think—I’m not quite sure—I think that’s a tort,” said Sam.

  “A what?”

  “Either a tort or a misdemeanour.”

  “Why, you do know something about it after all!” cried Billie, startled into a sort of friendliness in spite of herself. And at the words and the sight of her quick smile Sam’s professional composure reeled on its foundations. He had half risen, with the purpose of springing up and babbling of the passion that consumed him, when the chill reflection came to him that this girl had once said that she considered him ridiculous. If he let himself go, would she not continue to think him ridiculous? He sagged back into his seat and at that moment there came another tap on the door which, opening, revealed the sinister face of the holiday-making Peters.

  “Good morning, Mr. Samuel,” said Jno. Peters. “Good morning, Miss Milliken. Oh!”

  He vanished as abruptly as he had appeared. He perceived that what he had taken at first glance for the stenographer was a client, and that the junior partner was engaged on a business conference. He left behind him a momentary silence.

  “What a horrible-looking man!” said Billie, breaking it with a little gasp. Jno. Peters often affected the opposite sex like that at first sight.

  “I beg your pardon?” said Sam absently.

  “What a dreadful-looking man! He quite frightened me!”

  For some moments Sam sat without speaking. If this had not been one of his Napoleonic mornings, no doubt the sudden arrival of his old friend, Mr. Peters, whom he had imagined at his home in Putney packing for his trip to America, would have suggested nothing to him. As it was it suggested a great deal. He had had a brain-wave, and for fully a minute he sat tingling under its impact. He was not a young man who often had brain-waves, and, when they came, they made him rather dizzy.

  “Who is he?” asked Billie. “He seemed to know you? And who,” she demanded after a slight pause, “is Miss Milliken?”

  Sam drew a deep breath.

  “It’s rather a sad story,” he said. “His name is John Peters. He used to be clerk here.”

  “But isn’t he any longer?”

  “No.” Sam shook his head. “We had to get rid of him.”

  “I don’t wonder. A man looking like that….”

  “It wasn’t that so much,” said Sam. “The thing that annoyed father was that he tried to shoot Miss Milliken.”

  Billie uttered a cry of horror!

  “He tried to shoot Miss Milliken!”

  “He did shoot her—the third time,” said Sam warming to his work. “Only in the arm, fortunately,” he added. “But my father is rather a stern disciplinarian and he had to go. I mean, we couldn’t keep him after that.”

  “Good gracious!”

  “She used to be my father’s stenographer, and she was thrown a good deal with Peters. It was quite natural that he should fall in love with her. She was a beautiful girl, with rather your own shade of hair. Peters is a man of volcanic passions, and, when, after she had given him to understand that his love was returned, she informed him one day that she was engaged to a fellow at Ealing West, he went right off his onion—I mean, he became completely distraught. I must say that he concealed it very effectively at first. We had no inkling of his condition till he came in with the pistol. And, after that … well, as I say, we had to dismiss him. A great pity, for he was a good clerk. Still, it wouldn’t do. It wasn’t only that he tried to shoot Miss Milliken. That wouldn’t have mattered so much, as she left after he had made his third attempt, and got married. But the thing became an obsession with him, and we found that he had a fixed idea that every red-haired woman who came into the office was the girl who had deceived him. You can see how awkward that made it. Red hair is so fashionable nowadays.”

  “My hair is red!” whispered Billie pallidly.

  “Yes, I noticed it myself. I told you it was much the same shade as Miss Milliken’s. It’s rather fortunate that I happened to be here with you when he came.”

  “But he may be lurking out there still!”

  “I expect he is,” said Sam carelessly. “Yes, I suppose he is. Would you like me to go and send him away? All right.”

  “But—but is it safe?”

  Sam uttered a light laugh.

  “I don’t mind taking a risk or two for your sake,” he said, and sauntered from the room, closing the door behind him. Billie followed him with worshipping eyes.

  Jno. Peters rose politely from the chair in which he had seated himself for more comfortable perusal of the copy of Home Whispers which he had brought with him to refresh his mind in the event of the firm being too busy to see him immediately. He was particularly interested in the series of chats with Young Mothers.

  “Hullo, Peters,” said Sam. “Want anything?”

  “Very sorry to have disturbed you, Mr. Samuel. I just looked in to say good-bye. I sail on Saturday, and my time will be pretty fully taken up all the week. I have to go down to the country to get some final instructions from the client whose important papers I am taking over. I’m sorry to have missed your father, Mr. Samuel.”

  “Yes, this is his golf day, I’ll tell him you looked in.”

  “Is there anything I can do before I go?”

  “Do?”

  “Well—”—Jno. Peters coughed tactfully—”I see that you are engaged with a client, Mr. Samuel, and was wondering if any little point of law had arisen with which you did not feel yourself quite capable of coping, in which case I might perhaps be of assistance.”

  “Oh, that lady,” said Sam. “That was Miss Milliken’s sister.”

  “Indeed? I didn’t know Miss Milliken had a sister.”

  “No?” said Sam.

  “She is not very like her in appearance.”

  “No. This one is the beauty of the family, I believe. A very bright, intelligent girl. I was telling her about your revolver just before you came in, and she was most interested. It’s a pity you haven’t got it with you now, to show to her.”

  “Oh, but I have! I have, Mr. Samuel!” said Peters, opening a small handbag and taking out a hymn-book, half a pound of mixed chocolates, a tongue sandwich, and the pistol, in the order named. “I was on my way to the Rupert Street range for a little practice. I should be glad to show it to her.”

  “Well, wait here a minute or two,” said Sam, “I’ll have finished talking business in a moment,”

  He returned to the inner office.

  “Well?” cried Billie.
/>   “Eh? Oh, he’s gone,” said Sam. “I persuaded him to go away. He was a little excited, poor fellow. And now let us return to what we were talking about. You say….” He broke off with an exclamation, and glanced at his watch. “Good Heavens! I had no idea of the time. I promised to run up and see a man in one of the offices in the next court. He wants to consult me on some difficulty which has arisen with one of his clients. Rightly or wrongly he values my advice. Can you spare me for a short while? I shan’t be more than ten minutes.”

  “Certainly.”

  “Here is something you may care to look at while I’m gone. I don’t know if you have read it? Widgery on Nisi Prius Evidence. Most interesting.”

  He went out. Jno. Peters looked up from his Home Whispers.

  “You can go in now,” said Sam.

  “Certainly, Mr. Samuel, certainly.”

  Sam took up the copy of Home Whispers, and sat down with his feet on the desk. He turned to the serial story and began to read the synopsis.

  In the inner room, Billie, who had rejected the mental refreshment offered by Widgery, and was engaged in making a tour of the office, looking at the portraits of whiskered men whom she took correctly to be the Thorpes, Prescotts, Winslows and Applebys mentioned on the contents-bill outside, was surprised to hear the door open at her back. She had not expected Sam to return so instantaneously.

  Nor had he done so. It was not Sam who entered. It was a man of repellent aspect whom she recognised instantly, for Jno. Peters was one of those men who, once seen, are not easily forgotten. He was smiling, a cruel, cunning smile—at least, she thought he was; Mr. Peters himself was under the impression that his face was wreathed in a benevolent simper; and in his hand he bore the largest pistol ever seen outside a motion picture studio.

  “How do you do, Miss Milliken?” he said.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Billie had been standing near the wall, inspecting a portrait of the late Mr. Josiah Appleby, of which the kindest thing one can say is that one hopes it did not do him justice. She now shrank back against this wall, as if she were trying to get through it. The edge of the portrait’s frame tilted her hat out of the straight, but in this supreme moment she did not even notice it.

  “Er—how do you do?” she said.

  If she had not been an exceedingly pretty girl, one would have said that she spoke squeakily. The fighting spirit of the Bennetts, though it was considerable fighting spirit, had not risen to this emergency. It had ebbed out of her, leaving in its place a cold panic. She had seen this sort of thing in the movies—there was one series of pictures, The Dangers of Diana, where something of the kind had happened to the heroine in every reel—but she had not anticipated that it would ever happen to her: and consequently she had not thought out any plan for coping with such a situation. A grave error. In this world one should be prepared for everything, or where is one? The best she could do was to stand and stare at the intruder. It would have done Sam Marlowe good—he had now finished the synopsis and was skimming through the current instalment—if he could have known how she yearned for his return.

  “I’ve brought the revolver,” said Mr. Peters.

  “So—so I see!” said Billie.

  Mr. Peters nursed the weapon affectionately in his hand. He was rather a shy man with women as a rule, but what Sam had told him about her being interested in his revolver had made his heart warm to this girl.

  “I was just on my way to have a little practice at the range,” he said. “Then I thought I might as well look in here.”

  “I suppose—I suppose you’re a good shot?” quavered Billie.

  “I seldom miss,” said Jno. Peters.

  Billie shuddered. Then, reflecting that the longer she engaged this maniac in conversation, the more hope there was of Sam coming back in time to save her, she essayed further small-talk.

  “It’s—it’s very ugly!”

  “Oh, no!” said Mr. Peters, hurt.

  Billie perceived that she had said the wrong thing.

  “Very deadly-looking, I meant,” she corrected herself hastily.

  “It may have deadly work to do, Miss Milliken,” said Mr. Peters.

  Conversation languished again. Billie had no further remarks to make of immediate interest, and Mr. Peters was struggling with a return of the deplorable shyness which so handicapped him in his dealings with the other sex. After a few moments, he pulled himself together again, and, as his first act was to replace the pistol in the pocket of his coat, Billie became conscious of a faint stirring of relief.

  “The great thing,” said Jno. Peters, “is to learn to draw quickly. Like this!” he added, producing the revolver with something of the smoothness and rapidity with which Billie, in happier moments, had seen conjurers take a bowl of gold fish out of a tall hat. “Everything depends on getting the first shot! The first shot, Miss Milliken, is vital.”

  Suddenly Billie had an inspiration. It was hopeless she knew, to try to convince this poor demented creature, obsessed with his idee fixe, that she was not Miss Milliken. Denial would be a waste of time, and might even infuriate him into precipitating the tragedy. It was imperative that she should humour him. And, while she was humouring him, it suddenly occurred to her, why not do it thoroughly.

  “Mr. Peters,” she cried, “you are quite mistaken!”

  “I beg your pardon,” said Jno. Peters, with not a little asperity. “Nothing of the kind!”

  “You are!”

  “I assure you I am not. Quickness in the draw is essential.”

  “You have been misinformed.”

  “Well, I had it direct from the man at the Rupert Street range,” said Mr. Peters stiffly. “And if you had ever seen a picture called Two-Gun Thomas….”

  “Mr. Peters!” cried Billie desperately. He was making her head swim with his meaningless ravings. “Mr. Peters, hear me! I am not married to a man at Ealing West!”

  Mr. Peters betrayed no excitement at the information. This girl seemed for some reason to consider her situation an extraordinary one, but many women, he was aware, were in a similar position. In fact, he could not at the moment think of any of his feminine acquaintances who were married to men at Ealing West.

  “Indeed?” he said politely.

  “Won’t you believe me?” exclaimed Billie wildly.

  “Why, certainly, certainly,” said Jno. Peters.

  “Thank God!” said Billie. “I’m not even engaged! It’s all been a terrible mistake!”

  When two people in a small room are speaking on two distinct and different subjects and neither knows what on earth the other is driving at, there is bound to be a certain amount of mental confusion: but at this point Jno. Peters, though still not wholly equal to the intellectual pressure of the conversation, began to see a faint shimmer of light behind the clouds. In a nebulous kind of way he began to understand that the girl had come to consult the firm about a breach-of-promise action. Some unknown man at Ealing West had been trifling with her heart—hardened lawyer’s clerk a he was, that poignant cry “I’m not engaged!” had touched Mr. Peters—and she wished to start proceedings. Mr. Peters felt almost in his depth again. He put the revolver in his pocket, and drew out a note-book.

  “I should be glad to hear the facts,” he said with professional courtesy. “In the absence of the Guv’nor….”

  “I have told you the facts!”

  “This man at Ealing West,” said Mr. Peters, moistening the point of his pencil, “he wrote you letters proposing marriage?”

  “No, no, no!”

  “At any rate,” said Mr. Peters, disappointed but hopeful, “he made love to you before witnesses?”

  “Never! Never! There is no man at Ealing West! There never was a man at Ealing West!”

  It was at this point that Jno. Peters began for the first time to entertain serious doubts of the girl’s mental balance. The most elementary acquaintance with the latest census was enough to tell him that there were any number of men at Ealing West
. The place was full of them. Would a sane woman have made an assertion to the contrary? He thought not, and he was glad that he had the revolver with him. She had done nothing as yet actively violent, but it was nice to feel prepared. He took it out and laid it nonchalantly in his lap.

  The sight of the weapon acted on Billie electrically. She flung out her hands, in a gesture of passionate appeal, and played her last card.

  “I love you!” she cried. She wished she could have remembered his first name. It would have rounded off the sentence neatly. In such a moment she could hardly call him ‘Mr. Peters.’ “You are the only man I love.”

  “My gracious goodness!” ejaculated Mr. Peters, and nearly fell over backwards. To a naturally shy man this sudden and wholly unexpected declaration was disconcerting: and the clerk was, moreover, engaged. He blushed violently. And yet, even in that moment of consternation, he could not check a certain thrill. No man ever thinks he is as homely as he really is, but Jno. Peters had always come fairly near to a correct estimate of his charms, and it had always seemed to him, that, in inducing his fiancee to accept him, he had gone some. He now began to wonder if he were not really rather a devil of a chap after all. There must, he felt, be precious few men going about capable of inspiring devotion like this on the strength of about six and a half minutes casual conversation.

  Calmer thoughts succeeded this little flicker of complacency. The girl was mad. That was the fact of the matter. He got up and began to edge towards the door. Mr. Samuel would be returning shortly, and he ought to be warned.

  “So that’s all right, isn’t it!” said Billie.

  “Oh, quite, quite!” said Mr. Peters. “Er—thank you very much!”

  “I thought you would be pleased,” said Billie, relieved, but puzzled. For a man of volcanic passions, as Sam Marlowe had described him, he seemed to be taking the thing very calmly. She had anticipated a strenuous scene.

  “Oh, it’s a great compliment,” Mr. Peters assured her.

  At this point Sam came in, interrupting the conversation at a moment when it had reached a somewhat difficult stage. He had finished the instalment of the serial story in Home Whispers, and, looking at his watch he fancied that he had allowed sufficient time to elapse for events to have matured along the lines which his imagination had indicated.

 

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