“Why not?”
“I don’t know how to explain it, but I’m having a hard time with the idea of celebrating an arena that I only pushed for because of my grandfather. I don’t know what I think about him at the moment. It’s going to take a while to sort out my feelings about what he did.”
She nodded her understanding.
“What about any legal trouble for Hale?
“I’ve spoken with Thomas Green. The situation is sticky. He needs to look more into the statute of limitations, but even if it falls within, any investigation is going to be tough. As of right now, it’s basically just a story. There’s little to no evidence to support it. I suspect that it will be dismissed and the case will finally be closed after more than twenty years. Only time will tell. And, as a result, Mac Owens no longer has an article to publish.”
She sat up straight and turned to face me.
“Really? No PR mess? How did you manage that?”
“I spoke to Owens, too. Off the record, of course. You can imagine his surprise when I called,” I smirked. “I gave him the truth, or at least a very loose variation of it. Once I did that, there were too many holes in Charlie’s interview. I suspect that Mac Owens will be back eventually once he looks into the info I gave him, but it is what it is. He knows that publishing Charlie’s version would be career suicide for him. Plus, there’s no proof or anyone to corroborate it.”
“Not even Suzanne?”
“Justine assured me that she doesn’t know anything of real importance. The only thing she knows is that our name used to be Russo. I’m not too worried about it anymore.”
“What about Justine? How are things with you and her?”
I felt my jaw clench and had to force myself to relax.
“They’re okay,” I offered as a response.
“Okay? She makes me so angry,” Krystina spat out and her eyes flashed. “I’m not happy about what Hale did, but she knew that she was the one who killed your father for years and she never said a word. It was selfish and cowardly.”
I sighed, knowing that every word Krystina spoke was the truth. But, Justine was still my sister. And just like Hale, I could never turn my back on her completely. My relationship with her also needed time to heal.
“She did act selfish, but there’s no changing it. I suspect that things might never be the same between us again. I don’t know. Only time will tell. Hanging on to anger in the meantime won’t help matters.”
Krystina softened at my words and settled back into the crook of my arm.
“You’re right, Alex. It’s time to let go of the anger. All the hurt,” she murmured. “Considering the chaos of the past week, it now looks like everything is all tied up in a neat and tidy bow.
While she had openly participated in the conversation and asked questions, she now seemed far away in thought. So far away. I worried that I wouldn’t be able to reach her. My gut knotted, knowing what she was thinking. She had been through so much because of me. I was afraid she was questioning whether or not it was all worth it.
“Not everything is all tied up neat and tidy, angel.”
She looked up at me, her eyes wide and full of so many emotions. Anger. Sadness. Confusion. And love. I still saw love.
“What about us, Alex? Where do we go from here?”
36
krystina
My gaze held steady to Alexander’s.
“Where do we go from here?” he repeated. “Well, I was hoping that you’d still like to take that walk down the aisle.”
That fact that he would even question it astounded me. I was resolute in my decision to marry him, but I did think it was safe to assume that he would want to wait until the dust settled before we tied the knot.
“Alex, of cour –.”
“Wait,” he said and help up a hand to silence me. “Before you say yes, I need you to listen. I love you so much that it hurts. But there are few things that are going to change. Things I didn’t plan for that I need you to be on board with. If you can’t be, I’ll understand.”
My heart began to pound rapidly, wondering why he would think I wouldn’t support what he needed. I loved him irrevocably, without any sort of stipulations. Yet, it seemed as if he was going to give conditions to me. Apprehension crept into my bones.
“What is it?” I asked tentatively.
“I’ve made an appointment to see Dr. Tumblin again.”
“Oh! Well, that’s a good thing,” I said, feeling shocked and relieved all at the same time. I thought therapy was completely off the table.
“I’m going to see him alone, Krystina.”
“I see,” I replied, nodding slowly and waiting for him to continue. I had no idea where this was going.
“You and I don’t have any real issues that we need to work on. However, I do. My educational background won’t allow me to overlook the suppressed childhood memories I had. Ignoring PTSD of any kind would be foolish and potentially dangerous,” he paused and took a deep breath. “Any major problem we had in the past was always because of the issues I couldn’t face. If I continue to ignore them, it could cause problems down the road for us. I’m doing this as part of my promise to you, to show you that I will do anything to keep you. Are you good with me going at this alone?”
“Alex, if this is what you need to do, you have my full support. I promise.”
“There’s one more thing. I spoke to Kent Bloomfield about the house in Westchester. I asked him to modify the blueprints.”
“Oh, you spoke to the architect too? You’ve had a busy couple of days,” I observed. I tried to keep my tone light by adding a small chuckle in order to hide the way I instantly bristled at his statement. I thought we had an understanding about my involvement with building our house.
What changes would he make? He didn’t think to consult me first?
“I asked him to add two separate wings to the house,” Alexander added.
This time I really did laugh.
“Why in the world would we need two more wings?”
I stopped laughing when I saw how serious his expression became.
“One of the wings is for my mother. I’d like her to be transferred there to live. You won’t have to worry about anything. I will arrange for a full-time, live-in staff to care for her. She doesn’t know me, but I feel the need to make up for lost time.”
I thought about it for a moment before answering. All the horror stories I ever heard about nightmarish in-laws came to the forefront of my mind. However, this situation was so far from the norm. I would be extremely selfish to deny him this. For him, she was lost for more than twenty years. I couldn’t blame him for wanting her close.
I slowly nodded my consent.
“Okay, I’m good with that. What about the other wing?” I asked cautiously. If he told me Justine was moving in, I might have to take issue. Yes, I was currently upset with her, but it wasn’t that I didn’t like her. It was more of a privacy thing than anything else.
I looked at Alexander expectantly, waiting for him to respond. A devilish smile formed on his lips, making him seem more like himself than he had since he arrived.
“The other wing will be our master suite.”
“But we already had one designed,” I pointed out in confusion.
“Hmm, yes we did. But it was upstairs, in the middle of the house,” he waved off. “It will now be on the second floor of the East Wing. There will also be a staircase added.”
“I’m sorry? A staircase? Leading up to where?”
His smile grew broader.
“Not up. Down. It will go to a room that is only accessible from our bedroom. It won’t be open to anyone else. Just us,” he explained, drawling out his last two words slowly. Seductive almost.
My brow furrowed in confusion for a moment before the realization dawned. I nearly stopped breathing as a shiver raced down my spine.
“A playroom. You’re making us a playroom,” I stated, my voice coming out in almost a whisper
. My pulse began to race as he gripped the nape of my neck and leaned in to whisper in my ear.
“On Friday night, I saw your body wrapped in leather and lace. On Saturday night, despite the terrible circumstances, I got to see you in a shadowy setting surrounded by whips and chains. Just the idea of combining the two makes me inexplicably hard. And, if I recall correctly, you did say something about helping me secure the chains that would bind you to the wall.”
“Shackled. I said shackled,” I breathed the correction.
His fingers began to trace small circles near the hairline of my neck.
“As twisted as it sounds, I can’t seem to get that image out of my head. I don’t plan on ever stepping foot inside Club O again, but I did realize something as a result of that night. You were right when you said I needed that outlet. But it was never to release violence like I once thought. It’s for my pleasure. It’s what I enjoy. And with you, I can’t ignore it. I can’t explain how much I get off on seeing your strong spirit willingly submit to me. So, I’m creating a playroom of our own. That is, of course, if you still want me,” he added and pulled away to look at me. His eyes were intense when he met my gaze. “Do you still want me, Krystina?”
The tone of his question was low and husky. Goosebumps pebbled over my skin. I wasn’t sure if it was from the idea of a playroom or from the potent way he was looking at me. There was no doubt that still I wanted him. However, his gaze was so penetrating, the words got caught in my throat.
Tears began to well hot in my eyes and threatened to fall. It didn’t matter what his past was. He was still Alexander. He was still mine. He would always be mine. I reached up and cupped the side of his beautiful face.
“Yes, I still want you. I want forever with you,” I whispered.
Alexander grasped my shoulders, his sapphire eyes blazing fiercely with love and possessiveness, before tugging me into his embrace. I clung to him, absorbing the moment for a long while. When he pulled away, he leveled his gaze to mine. His expression was serious.
“Pick a date,” he said.
“A date?”
“Yes, for our wedding. I want this set in stone today. Right now.”
God, he’s always so demanding.
I contemplated toying with him over it and tossed him a cheeky grin.
“Oh, well…I don’t know,” I said slowly.
“So help me, Krystina,” he began in warning. I laughed and swatted at his arm. It felt so good to be here with him. In this moment. It was where I belonged and where I planned to stay for a very long time.
“You make it too easy,” I kidded. “But, if you insist on picking a date today, I was thinking about sometime in the summer. I kind of fancy a certain boat docked at Montauk Marina.”
“You want to get married on The Lucy?” he asked, almost sounding incredulous.
“Only if you want to. It was just an idea,” I shrugged and looked down at my lap, trying to sound indifferent. The fact of the matter was, I had been thinking about getting married on his boat for a while now and couldn’t get the images of a sunset wedding out of my head. But, if Alexander had a different idea, I’d be open to it. I didn’t want to fight anymore, especially about the most important day of our lives.
Alexander reached up and took my chin in between his fingers. Lifting my face to meet his gaze, I found his blue eyes alight with happiness.
“Miss Cole, I can’t wait to call you Mrs. Stone and I think getting married on The Lucy is an absolutely perfect idea.”
Epilogue
krystina
The summer had been exceptionally warm and humid, even by New York standards. However, today was comfortable with temperatures in the mid-seventies. A gentle breeze danced off the waves of Lake Montauk, causing water to lap against the docks and boats at the marina. I closed my eyes and listened to the soothing sound coming in through the porthole of The Lucy. It was rhythmic and relaxing, and worked wonders to soothe my tremulous nerves.
After a few minutes, I opened them and stepped up to the full-length mirror in the master suite of the boat. Running my hands down the sides of my wedding dress, I took in the exquisite satin. My stomach was a ball of nerves, but not so much that I couldn’t appreciate how incredible the gown felt on me. Inspired by Inbal Dror, my dress designer created a backless satin bridal gown with hints of lace. Of course, her creation didn’t go without input from my mother, Justine, and Allyson. They suggested that embellishments be added to the plunging V-shaped backline. It was now scattered with clear sequin beading set on lace, giving the gown that hint of simple elegance I was looking for.
I fingered the pearl spaghetti straps as I took in my reflection. The straps dipped into a sweetheart neckline, accentuating the curve of my breasts without revealing too much. Not wanting to bother with my unruly mass of curls, a stylist came on board that morning to do my hair. She styled it half up and half down, leaving most of it to cascade down my back with just a few curls left free to frame my face. My veil wasn’t overly long, the pearl edges stopping just below the tips of my hair.
“Oh, love! You look stunning!” my mother gushed as she entered the suite. I smiled at her through my reflection as she stepped up behind me.
“You don’t think my makeup is too much?” I asked.
“Absolutely not. It’s delicate and natural. It’s just perfect!”
We stood together in the full-length mirror, a million unspoken words passing between us, before I turned to face her.
“Thank you, Mom.”
“For what?”
“For helping me plan all of this. I never thought you would do it, but when you jumped right in, it meant the world to me. I know you’ve had your reservations about me and Alex, but –,” I stopped, my eyes welling up with tears. I was suddenly feeling overly emotional, all of my childhood memories coming to the forefront of my mind.
“Now, now. Don’t do that. You’ll mess up your makeup,” she chided.
“No, really. I know the sacrifices you made for me years ago after my father took off. And then, when I was ten years old and you got together with Frank…” I trailed off, unsure of how to explain what I thought about her marriage to my stepfather.
“Krystina, I know what you think about my marriage. You think I didn’t marry Frank for love. In some respect, you are correct. Frank offered a means to an end at a time when I could barely afford to put food on our table. But, I knew he was a good man and I cared deeply for him. Eventually, I did fall in love with him. He was very persuasive,” she added with a light laugh. “Perhaps I didn’t fall for him in the conventional way, but it did happen.”
“Does Frank know? I mean, that you didn’t love him in the beginning?”
“Oh, I suspect he might. That could be why he’s always spoiled me so much. You know how he dotes on me and likes to take care of me. That’s why, when I saw you and Alex together, I got scared.”
“Scared? What do you mean?”
“Alex has a possessive way about him. He looks at you like there’s not another soul on the planet, like he would move mountains for you. I’ve only seen one other man look at a woman the way.”
“Frank,” I said immediately. “He looks at you like that.”
She smiled softly and nodded.
“I knew it wouldn’t be long before Alex staked his forever claim on you, and I was right. But,” she added.
“There’s always a ‘but’,” I laughed.
“But, don’t go having babies right away. You have years to do that. Take some time to get to know each other first,” she advised.
My mother reached down to squeeze my hand just as the door to the suite burst open. Allyson came hurrying in, her arms laden with flowers, boxes, and who knew what else. I could barely see her burgundy maid of honor dress behind all the things she was carrying.
“Delivery!” she sang.
“Ally, what is all that?” I asked as she placed everything down on the settee. She picked up a huge bouquet of cream colored lil
y’s and handed them to me.
“These are from Alex, along with this,” she said and handed me a small gift box with a note card attached. I set the items aside with the intent of opening the card and gift box in private.
“What’s the rest of the stuff, Ally?”
“Something borrowed and something blue,” she stated matter-of-factly. I had nearly forgotten the tradition. “We talked about you borrowing my pearl necklace, so this works perfectly for your something borrowed.”
She pulled the necklace out of its case and held it out to me. Moving in, she reached around my neck and secured the clasp. I smiled my thanks as I touched the pearls resting near my collarbone.
“I know my dress is the something new, but what about the something blue?” I asked. “To be honest, I never even thought about it.”
“Oh, don’t you worry about that. Your mom has you covered there,” Allyson assured.
I turned toward my mother. Tears shone in her eyes as she picked up a shallow rectangular box that Allyson brought in. She opened it up and pulled out a white scrap of material with blue embroidery.
“Your grandmother, although you don’t remember her, was a hopeless romantic,” my mother explained. “On the day you were born, she had this made for you. It’s a handkerchief with your name embroidered on it in light blue. Of course, naturally I asked her why she chose blue instead of pink. She told me that I was to give this to you on your wedding day so that you would have your something blue.”
I smiled.
“And you kept it all this time?”
“Of course, I did! She’d come back to haunt me if I didn’t!” my mother laughed.
“I guess that just leaves my something old,” I murmured, glancing over to Allyson’s pile. There didn’t appear to be anything of use, as our flower bouquets were the only things left sitting there.
“Open your gift from Alex,” Allyson suggested. Her eyes were sparkling with mischief. I narrowed my gaze at her.
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