Not An Angel (A Poryria Vampire Novel (Book 1))

by Dawn Chartier

  Mike cleared his throat. “So, he’s told you.”

  She reeled back. How could she have trusted Trace enough to be with him like that? What had she truly stumbled across here? They’re both nuts.

  “Nah, were not nuts. Well, maybe partially, but we are what Trace said.” Mike disappeared before her eyes and then the door closed before she had the chance to recoup herself.

  Her breathing came fast and her heart thumped wildly. Mike had read her thoughts. Impossible. What kind of game were they playing?

  She cast a glance behind her and found Trace standing several feet away, giving her enough space to run. This would not be the end, she thought. She had to try to escape again. How she wished she had something near her that she could throw. Then she thought about the sling, her necklace around her neck, but there were two of them, and one of her, so that was out of the question. So instead, she vaulted toward the door, tugging and banging her fists, but it would not open an inch.

  “Kira. Stop.”

  She whirled around. “I said let—me—go.”

  Trace fell silent and shook his head.

  Her breaths fast and shallow, she fisted her trembling hands. Trace might not allow her to leave, but she was not going to give up. “Why?”

  “Kira. I’m sorry. I only wanted to help you. I never meant to—“

  “I’m such an idiot,” she yelled. “Why do I do this to myself?”

  Trace took a step toward her. His hand reached out, pleading. “No. Don’t say that. I know how strange this all seems.”

  “If you don’t let me go, I’ll scream at the top of my lungs.” She stepped back and bumped into the door, trapped.

  Trace reached to touch her cheek, but she shifted to the side, her shoulder knocking into Mike’s muscular abs. She glanced up at him.

  Mike shrugged. “Sorry, sweetheart, I don’t want you here either.”

  Trace growled. “Mike step away from her.” He turned to her. “I know this seems bad, but you can’t leave. Not yet. I swear I will not harm you. And, in spite of what you feel right now, I hope you can see I do care about you.”

  Shaking her head, she put her hands out, distancing him from stepping any closer. “If you cared, then let me go.”

  “Remember the story. There are some good Poryria out there, just like humans. You have the good, the bad and the in-between. I’d like to consider I’m somewhere in-between. Have I hurt you? Wouldn’t you think I’d already done it if I were going to?”

  She could not think clearly. Nothing made sense. She wanted to believe him. Not once had he tried to hurt her, he was right about that. But, she couldn’t stay here, and they couldn’t be what they said. “You won’t let me go?”

  He shook his head. “If I let you go, our Queen will have you hunted. Trust me you don’t want that to happen.”

  “I’ll take my chances.”

  “I can’t allow it.”

  She glanced around the room searching for another way. “Then you are just like Jeff.”

  He narrowed his eyes. “You can’t mean that. Do you have any idea what Jeff was going to do to you? I would never do that.”

  “Yet you still won’t let me go.”

  “Kira, I—I can’t. The Queen demanded our company tonight. We have to meet with her. I cannot disobey again. She has her limits.”

  She wrapped her arms around her stomach still searching for an escape. “Why? I won’t tell her anything. Just let me leave.”

  “I can’t.”

  She squeezed tighter around her waist to keep her hands from shaking. “What does she want with me?”

  “I disobeyed direct orders.” He paused. “I was ordered to clear your memory of me. Now she thinks you’re a danger to the Poryria race.” He shook his head. “She doesn’t know you like we know you.” He glanced at Mike, then his gaze drifted back to her. “Like I know you.”

  This was insane. He couldn’t wipe her memory clean. “How could I be a threat to you? What do I know?” She sighed. Deep in her heart she knew what Trace said was true. He was not like her. He wasn’t human.

  “But, you do know.” Trace lifted his hand to her cheek.

  She flinched, but then a warm calmness cloaked her mind, and she no longer trembled.

  “You have all control. Can’t you see?” His voice was in her mind.

  His gentle touch…there was something familiar about the tranquil feel of it. My God, the hospital. She could have sworn those nights in the hospital someone had been there at her bedside holding her hand when she stirred from a light sleep, but when she woke, no one was there. At first she attributed it to the dreams, but now that she felt that same sense of peace. She recognized him. His touch.

  “You were there weren’t you? You were with me at the hospital.”

  “Yes.” His hand stroked her arm.

  “This calmness I’m feeling, that’s you doing that?”

  He nodded.

  She slapped his hand away. “Don’t. Don’t do that. Stay out of my head.” She’d thought she was going insane. When she woke during the night she expected to see someone, and there was no one.

  “What about the dreams? Were you really there?” She had to know.

  He turned an eye on Mike. Something passed between them. “Yes. I wasn’t positive until just now. We shared our dreams.” He shrugged. “Do you believe me now?” he asked.

  “I can’t.” It was too much to take in. They couldn’t be real.

  He stared at his black shoes and spoke. “At first, I thought this connection between us was because you reminded me of someone. Someone who died long ago, but then I realized you two are nothing alike.” He paused. “Your pain spoke to me, and I wanted to help you. I wanted to heal you. We connected on a level that should be impossible between human and Poryria—the pull between us is nothing I’ve ever known.”

  She heard sincerity in his voice. Her words came without warning. “She was your wife, wasn’t she?

  A sad smile played on his lips. “No. I wasn’t capable of giving myself like that. I was a taker. She insisted that I change her…turn her into one of us.” He closed his eyes. “She slit her wrist. I was too late. I found her bleeding to death in the tub…”

  While pain crawled into her heart, she’d barely noticed Mike leaving the room. Here she was being held captive, and yet she stood in front of him wondering how long he had carried this burden. A burden she knew all too well. “It wasn’t your fault.”

  “The hell it wasn’t. We used each other, but I knew better. I shouldn’t have involved her in my life.” His gaze caught hers. “And now time is repeating itself.”

  She placed her hand over his sensing he had cared a lot for this woman. “You must have loved her deeply?” She shouldn’t be even thinking these thoughts. Her mind should be on escaping.

  “Love, no. I’m not built that way,” he said in resignation as his hand raked through his dark hair. “I could never allow it…”

  He lifted his dark sad eyes and held her with their spell. “But with you, your passion, your selflessness. I don’t know. It’s as though, for the first time I discovered my reason for existence. You.”

  Her tongue twisted; she couldn’t respond. She’d often wondered if she could ever trust another man. But this. Was this possible? Why wasn’t she thinking about saving her own life? Why didn’t she truly feel threatened? The Queen, what would she do to her? Would she clean her mind of Trace? The thought scared her more than knowing that vampires ran around town.

  She dropped her hand from his. “Everything and everyone I’ve ever believed in has hurt me. Honestly, I don’t know you. I don’t know anything right now.”

  “I can’t tell you to trust me,” he said. “I can only ask. It’s why I’ve shown you who I am. I don’t want any secrets between us.” He tilted his head. “I need you to believe me as I’ve come to believe in you.”

  She shook her head. “My heart won’t allow it.”

  The hard lines on his face softene
d. “Will you let me try?”

  Kira found herself wanting to give him a chance. She sighed. “I don’t suppose I have a choice.”

  Trace took her hand in his. “I won’t cloud your mind…and I won’t harm you. Try to relax.” He lowered his voice. “I’ll help you.”

  She started to speak, but in that same instant, she felt as if she were lifted from the ground, and in a blink thrust across a great distance. Disoriented, she searched for something to hold on to, for some way to stop this crazed blur of motion. Then she sensed him. He was with her, holding her. His light touch heightened sensations of this strange new world, every cell in her body energized. All that existed was Trace.

  It all happened in a heartbeat. Before she could take another breath she found herself in a swimming pool, lounging on a small raft. A red one-piece swimsuit clung to each curve of her body.

  The pool filled a cavernous room. An attached Jacuzzi hummed with jets that folded aqua-blue water back onto itself in foamy swirls, while at the far end, a waterfall cascaded over rocks spilling into the pool.

  Her heart pounded, both her hands holding a death grip on the unsteady raft.

  Trace surfaced from beneath in an explosive geyser of water and waves.

  “Swimming in warm water always soothes me.” He shook his head, drying his hair, which caused more waves.

  Kira squirmed, frantically trying to catch her breath and balance. Her head buzzed with a full-fledged panic attack. “Water…”

  Trace’s smile faded. “Kira? What’s wrong?”

  She tried to take a suffocating breath. She reached out to grab Trace around his neck, and ended up hitting him across his cheek. “I can’t swim…why do you think I chose a bridge to jump from? I’m afraid of water.”

  *******

  Trace transported them back into the house, and placed her on his bed. He cupped her cheeks and put his face next to hers. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

  “I’m better.” After a moment her eyes grew wide, shifting away from him. She must have remembered what he was.

  “Shh...I won’t hurt you.” He smoothed his hand from her temple to caress her cheek.

  Kira released a tense breath. “Water and I don’t get along. I don’t mind the sounds of the ocean, but I don’t want to be in it.”

  Pain stabbed him. He hadn’t known, but why on earth would she jump from a bridge if she were deathly afraid of water? That had to be the oddest thing he’d ever heard. “My intentions were good,” he offered.

  She shivered and then leaned on the pillow. “You couldn’t have known, but before you pull something like that again you might want to explain what you are doing first.” She paused and scanned the room. “So, how did you do that anyway?”

  He couldn’t believe his ears. She wanted to know how he vanished and reappeared. Wasn’t she afraid of him? Was she finally accepting what he was? He inhaled absorbing her honey skin scent. He could dream…couldn’t he? “My abilities didn’t scare you?” He couldn’t blame her if they did, but he needed her to know this was his true nature.

  She shrugged. “The water scared me.” She pushed on his chest. “But, don’t ever do that again.”

  A smile tugged on his lips. “I won’t.”

  “It felt weird. Really weird.” She stared at him as if he were an alien.

  “Weird? I am what I am. I cannot change that part of me. If you don’t want me to, I won’t touch you again.” Had he actually said that? He couldn’t believe those words came from him. He couldn’t promise her that he wouldn’t touch her again. It was impossible.

  No matter, he still ached to hold her. Trusting would be hard for her, but he would try anyway. They were alike in that way. He didn’t have faith in too many people, either. With her, he was different. He could open up and share his deepest secrets. And he also trusted her with his life. When had that happened? Swallowing the revelation, he added, “Do you want me to touch you again?” then held his hand out. She hesitated, and then placed her trembling hand in his.

  “Thank you.” He kissed her knuckles.

  The fireplace in the corner of the room roared to life, causing her to flinch. The pleasant smell of hearth drifted through the air and touched her senses. Kira shook her head, but didn’t pull away. She found herself wanting to smile, while her cold body warmed from the fire’s heat. Dry logs crackled and hissed in protest to the suddenness of flames that licked at them.

  The room heated inch by inch, and Kira allowed herself to open her mind to the possibilities of another world coexisting with her own. The world she’d always known was full of monsters, the human kind. Trace on the other hand was not human, but he had more virtue than anyone she had ever met… Kira shook her head. “I accept who you are…but I’m a little scared of the possibilities of the others. The things they can do to me.”

  His lips brushed her finger tips. “Don’t be. I’ll protect you. I had to prepare you for tonight. I didn’t mean for you to feel like I was kidnapping you. That was not my intention. Remember, you’ll see and hear things that you won’t understand or even think possible. I’ll explain everything later. All I ask is that you promise to keep the Poryria race a secret. With trust, comes responsibility. Our lives are in your hands.”

  She smirked. “Who would believe me?”

  Trace wrapped his arms around her, and she leaned closer to him relishing in the comfort of his touch. Although she still had her doubts, she felt safer with him.

  “What happened to Mike? Now he scares me.”

  He ran his hand down her hair. “Mikal would never touch you. He loathes humans.”

  “Loathes them as in wants to kill them?” Did Trace kill humans? She hadn’t had time to think about that.

  “Only those who deserve death. Never an innocent.” His breath near her ear sent erotic shivers down her spine. “Can I ask if there are any other fears you have besides drowning?”

  “Dying,” she said in a nervous laugh. “Is there anything else out there that I’m not aware of?”

  He arched his brows. “Don’t ask unless you really want to know.” He smoothed his hands down her back.

  She snuggled closer, enjoying his caress.

  “Feeling better?”

  “Yes.” But, all she could think about was his tender touch and wonder what else he could do. She knew Mike could read her mind, and Trace could calm her and transport from one room to another. What else? She pushed away. “So can you tell me how you did that trick?”

  The contours of his jaw and prominent cheeks usually so stern, softened with tenderness. His eyes deep, dark, and yet full of concern. Though buried beneath, she could still see he was worried. If she could read his mind, she would bet it had to do with the Queen. She pushed her fears aside for now.

  “I can’t explain, but all Poryria have talents, as we call them. Some talents are more like curses. Most Poryria can move from one place to another just by thinking it. I’ve a few talents that others don’t have, and they have a few I don’t. Just like with humans. Some can sing, some can dance. Others can do both and some none at all. Make sense?”

  Kira nodded, though she questioned her sanity for her easy acceptance of this strange, new reality. Everything still overwhelmed her, but she decided it would be easier just to go with it. She couldn’t stop thinking about this Queen. The one who had killed Bothwells, while she was pregnant. Would Trace be able to protect her from the Queen?

  She pictured in her mind the long teeth slashing Bothwells' throat. Blood spurting everywhere. The man gasping. Then another reality hit her. Trace is a vampire. Vampires must feed. She stared at him with growing apprehension. Whose blood did he drink and would he ask for hers?

  Chapter 12

  Later that night, Kira lowered herself onto an antique lounge chair in the Queen’s mansion. She crossed her legs, uncrossed and crossed them again. Her fingers traced the ivory patterns on the lounger. Nervously, she tugged the slit of her gown, trying to close the hem over her revealed t
high. She pulled it together and caught Trace starring at her exposed leg with heat in his eyes.

  She turned her head, knowing she blushed as warm tingles erupted on the place his gaze had settled. She shifted. The passion between them she couldn’t deny. Where had her sanity gone? A new emotion had emerged replacing it with longing, desire. She sighed. She’d given up fighting a battle she couldn’t win. Her heart wanted to belong to Trace—ached to be his. An unseen magnet drew them together no matter how hard she fought.

  They were told to wait in the silent parlor while the Queen took her time showing up. She scratched her neck. What was taking so long? She wanted to get this over with. The waiting game was not her favorite past time.

  Biting her bottom lip, she observed rich plum curtains that graced the wall and flowed into a thick heap on the floor. She changed positions and her silver heels tapped the tan and brown cobblestone floors. The stone pattern continued up the rear wall. The walls were mostly bare, except for two portraits hanging above a smooth bone tile fireplace. One portrait depicting a sad woman with eyes that penetrated right through her. The other faded picture was of twin babies lying naked on an ebony fur rug. The twin boys like in Trace’s story.

  The hairs suddenly rose on her neck. She rubbed her icy hands together and then blew on them to warm them. Was she shivering because of being nervous or cold? Trace captured her glance with serious eyes. He reached down, intertwined his hand with hers and squeezed gently.

  She bit her lip, then stood on wobbly legs. The spike heels she could do without.

  He tightened his grip, and she was glad she made the decision to stay with him. To prove to the Queen she would not betray their secret, their hidden world. She still wasn’t sure if it was the right decision, but here she stood next to Trace.