by Lisa Olsen
“You heard that?”
“I did. You got some brass ones, lady, going up against him like that,” he chuckled, but I didn’t share his enjoyment of the confrontation.
“What did you want to talk to me about then, if you’re not going to confront Corley?”
“I put him off on the agreement, said I didn’t feel qualified to make the decision and I wanted to wait for the new Elder to step in.”
“Okay, that makes sense. Where do I come in?” It took me all of five seconds to figure it out on my own given the slow smile that spread across his face. “Wait… me? No… you’re not serious, are you?”
“You’re a shoe in as far as I’m concerned,” Felix beamed. “As far as I know, you’re the closest thing to an Elder we have in the West with Bishop gone. With your power and experience, you’re the natural choice.”
My power and experience. Boy howdy, was he barking up the wrong tree! “I’d think you’d want to step up and take over, Felix. Haven’t you been handling the day to day stuff for the most part already?”
“I know myself well enough to know what I’m good at and what I’m not. I’m good at that day to day stuff, like you said, but I ain’t got the right temperament to be the head honcho. There needs to be a level of objectivity and from what I’ve seen, you’ve got it. Plus, you got the cajones to go up against the big boys when the occasion calls for it,” he grinned.
How did I get myself into these situations? Me, Elder of the West? “I’m not all that sure how objective I am. You heard me in there with him. I’m not good at diplomacy. I like to call a spade a spade.”
“Some people would call that level of honesty refreshing.”
Even if I wasn’t a complete fraud, worrying from day to day if I’d be exposed, I wasn’t sure I was the right person for the job. Wielding that kind of power with my “gift” could lead to a serious disaster if my personal life was any indication. “Let me think about it, okay?”
“You bet. Don’t decide anything right now, mull it over a bit. We can talk more about it on the plane ride home. There’s plenty of time before the council meets about the candidates anyway.”
The fact that I had zero idea how vampire government worked was a perfect indication as to why it was such a bad idea to even consider it. “Okay, I will. When did you want to leave?”
“I figure we’ll go around midnight, if that works for you. That’ll give ‘em time to get the jet all ready to go and we can just make it back before the sun comes up.”
Midnight. That gave me plenty of time to take care of arrangements for Ellie, but Bishop… that was another story. I had to find him first and try to talk him into coming with me. “Sure, that works for me. If you’ll excuse me, I need to take care of some business before I go.”
“You got it. Listen, I really hope you decide to say yes, Anja. I think we could make a good team, you and me.”
Another person who wanted to work with me. Cool beans.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
“Bishop… please call me back. Felix said the plane will be leaving at midnight, so I don’t have much time. I know you’re mad… but I can’t leave with things like this between us. Just… call me, okay?” It was the third message I’d left while packing, and I was no closer to reaching him.
There wasn’t much I could do about it if he refused to talk to me, and I started to think about what I’d do if he never called. Would I really get on that plane with Felix and the others without saying goodbye? I couldn’t stay behind, Corley had pretty much ordered me out of the country. Part of me couldn’t believe Bishop was being so stubborn, but I could also see he might be too busy with Order business to deal with personal things too.
My phone buzzed, and a thrill of hope went through me as I picked it up, only to crash and burn when I saw it was a text from Rob.
Need to pick up papers, come and babysit?
Hoping those were the papers we’d been waiting for, I sent back a quick message to let him know I’d be right over and that I was leaving town at midnight. That at least was one less thing I’d have to worry about with my quick departure. Ellie would be safe from execution.
I let myself into Rob’s apartment after a brief rap on the door. “Hi, guys.” I unwound the scarf from my neck as I came in, noting with amusement that Ellie had outfitted herself from his grandmother’s castoffs. “You look like you made yourself at home. How are you?”
“Climbing the bloody walls,” Ellie scowled. “Are we going out to eat now?”
“You need to feed already? You just ate last night,” I frowned, looking to Rob, who gave a brief nod. “I guess I forgot how often you need to eat right after you turn.” Maybe it was the Ellri blood, but I’d never had to feed that often. Then again, I’d stopped her before she had her fill the night before. Maybe that had something to do with it.
“Too right, I need to feed.” Ellie’s head wobbled as she nodded. “I feel like I’m gonna vom if I have another sweetie.”
“Okay, relax, I’ll take you out.” It would have to be quick, but we could manage it while Rob picked up her papers.
“You want me to go with?” he asked while Ellie got her boots on. An interesting combination with the sweet flowered dress she wore.
“No, I think we can handle it. Besides, I’m kind of on a time crunch.”
“Yeah, you said something about leaving tonight?”
“I sort of wore out my welcome at the mansion.” I gave him a crooked grin and he returned it.
“That sounds like a tale worth telling.”
“No time for now though. We’d better get a move on. I still have to find Bishop and talk to him before I go. You all set, Ellie?” I asked when I saw her fiddling with her hair in front of the mirror.
“Yes, I’m ready.”
“We’ll see you back here later, Rob. Come on, Ellie, it’s fast food for you tonight.”
Instead of letting her pick someone out in a bar, I settled on the target for Ellie, and she didn’t complain too much once she got a taste. She didn’t do too badly, though my prompting her to try and count in her head didn’t do a damn thing for her self control. Even after I urged her to stop, she would have kept going until I pulled her off the girl.
What did I expect from a girl who’d only been a vampire for a few days? Gaining that new perspective sure helped me feel a little better about my own urges though, and I was grateful I’d had Bishop to help guide me through it.
Bishop.
On the way back to Rob’s apartment, I tried texting him again, feeling more and more panicky the closer the clock edged to midnight. I almost fainted when I got a text back from him that said: We need to talk.
My fingers flew over the keypad. Agree. Where are you??? When no immediate response came, I tried to focus on Ellie’s chatter as we turned onto Rob’s street. Her hunger sated, she returned to the bubbly, fresh faced girl I’d come to like, her combination of naiveté and street smarts amusing under normal circumstances. As it was, she barely drew a smile out of me as I waited for Bishop’s return text.
Rob must’ve still been out, because the light was off in the apartment, but the door was unlocked for us. “When Rob gets back, we’ll talk about if you can keep staying here after I’m gone,” I said, feeling around for a light switch. “I don’t know if he’s sticking around London or if he has to go somewhere else for his business. After that I have to get going, I still have to find Bishop.”
“I’m right here.” The light clicked on to reveal Bishop leaning against the wall behind the door. While we stared at him, he shut the door, effectively trapping us inside the basement apartment.
“Bishop…” I sucked in a breath. How had he gotten in without an invitation? Come to think of it, I’d entered the apartment without an invitation too. There wasn’t time to dwell on it too much with Bishop staring us down.
“He is cute,” Ellie gave me a knowing smile. “I’d break a few laws for him myself.”
I ignored her,
more concerned with the look on his face; I’d seen it before. “How did you find us?”
“It’s my job, remember? This is what I do.”
“No,” I shook my head as I caught sight of the gun in his hand. “You don’t have to do this, I got papers for her. She’s legal.” Or at least she would be as soon as Rob got back with them. What would Rob do if he showed up with Bishop there? Would they end up fighting? I didn’t even want to think about who would win between them. Either way I’d lose.
“But I know it’s bullshit, it’s not legal. The papers are forged.”
“What, like you ain’t never had a fake ID before?” Ellie scoffed, and I shot her a quelling look.
“So are mine. Are you going to kill me too?”
Bishop’s shoulders sank in exasperation. “That’s different. Your sire is an Ellri, you don’t need papers. Anja, I’m doing this for you.”
“What? That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard. In what world are you possibly doing this for me?”
“Can’t you even see the hole you’ve dug for yourself? You’re in way over your head. If I take care of her then you’re off the hook for breaking the law.”
I understood his logic in solving the problem, but I wasn’t willing to sacrifice her life to save mine. “You can’t kill her, it’s the wrong thing to do.” For the second time in two nights I put myself between Bishop and his target.
“The hell I can’t, it’s my job. It’s what I do. It’s what I am.”
“No, you’re capable of more than that. You proven that with me,” I pleaded with him, but instead of acknowledging the point, it only seemed to agitate Bishop all the more.
“Did I? Or did you influence me into breaking faith with everything I believe in? Everything I stand for?”
I flinched at the vehemence in his voice. “Is that what you believe? I did this to you? None of that was your decision at all?” If he truly believed that, we didn’t stand a chance.
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore,” he said miserably. “All I know is my life turned upside down once you showed up and I’m tired of having my head screwed with. Now, step out of the way and let me do my job.”
I took a deep breath, feeling Ellie trembling behind me. “No.”
“Anja…” I swear his gun was aimed right for my forehead and I wondered what he had in there. It couldn’t be tranquilizer darts like Mason carried, or he would have shot us both without hesitation. “Get out of the way.”
I knew what I had to do. I knew there was no reasoning with him and if I left, he would just hunt Ellie down again and “take care of it”. I also knew it went completely against my promise to him, but what choice did I have?
“Bishop, put the gun down.” Sending out my will, I caught hold of his. It wasn’t like the last time. It wasn’t a matter of hit or miss, Bishop fought my compulsion every step of the way. The gun wavered in his hand as we stared at each other in a silent struggle. “Put the gun down,” I ordered, my voice no greater than a whisper, but it was enough. His arm lowered with a grunt as his muscles strained in protest, but any thrill of victory I might have felt was smothered by the anguish I saw on his face. “Bishop, I’m…”
“Damn you…” he spat out with more contempt than I’d ever seen from him before, all but tearing the door off its hinges in his hurry to get away from me.
“…sorry.”
*
I’m stupid sometimes. For all the nerdy girl cred I had growing up, and the good grades, I can still be incredibly stupid. I didn’t feel stupid for compelling Bishop; I still felt like I didn’t have much choice. And I didn’t feel stupid for not compelling him to forget about it, because that would have been a worse betrayal in the end. What I did feel stupid for was expecting him to show up at any moment to work things out.
There were things I needed to tell him, things I wanted to say that had nothing to do with our personal problems. I wanted to tell him about Angel’s (and the Order’s) involvement in Tommy’s death and Felix’s offer to me. I wanted to talk to him about why I’d stayed behind to talk to Carter, instead of leaving with him when he asked. I wanted to tell him to watch his back around Corley. But most of all, I wanted him to show up and tell me that he still loved me.
But I knew deep down it was a stupid fantasy, because there was no sign of him when I got to the airport with Ellie and Rob by my side. I couldn’t leave her behind, not with the Order gunning for her, papers or no papers. Plus, she needed me, the last attempt at feeding proved that. If I wanted her to grow up to be a responsible vamp, I had to look out for her or I’d be no better than Jakob.
Rob had surprised me by his offer to fly back with us though. I’d assumed his business would keep him in England, but he said his change of plan had a change of plan and he’d stick with us until we got back to San Francisco.
Even more surprising was finding Maggie beside my luggage in the executive lounge of the private jetway. “What are you doing here?”
“They said you were leaving at midnight, so I gathered your things together and I thought… that is, if you allowed it…”
“You want to come to California with me?”
“There’s nothing for me here. I thought maybe you might still be offering that fresh start you spoke of, so I took a chance.” Her face shone with hope, and I didn’t have it in me to crush it, not after the night I’d had.
“Alright, as long as Felix doesn’t mind a full house, it’s fine with me. Ah, Maggie,” I drew her away from the others. “You should know though… I’m not a rich, powerful vampire, no matter what you might have heard. I don’t even know where I’ll be living once we get back.”
“I don’t expect you to support me, I can pay my way.” She brought out a thick sheaf of bills from her pocket and my eyes bulged.
“Put that away before someone mugs you.” I covered her hands with mine. “Where did you get all that money?”
“I sold the jewelry Jasper bought me, along with a few of his portable possessions. It should last me a good while if I live on the cheap. So you don’t have to worry about me being a burden to you.”
“You’re not a burden to me,” I said, squeezing her hand warmly. “And you’re welcome to stay with me once I figure out where that will be. I just have to work some things out with Bishop first.”
“Perhaps you should talk to him then.” Maggie’s gaze focused over my shoulder, the hint of a smile on her lips. My head swiveled around like an owl’s, my stomach flip flopping like crazy when I spotted Bishop by the jetway doors.
Because I’m stupid, I ran to his arms like you see in the movies. But instead of catching me up and spinning me around while the music swelled, Bishop took a step backwards. He stepped away from me. That should have been my first clue, but I’m stupid, like I said.
“You’re here,” I beamed. “You really came. I was starting to think you wouldn’t.”
Bishop didn’t respond, his gaze sweeping over the lounge area, taking in the sight of Felix and Bridget sharing drinks in the corner, Maggie standing where I’d left her by my luggage, and Rob and Ellie by the vending machine. His eyes narrowed at Ellie and I saw Rob take her hand, whispering something to her I couldn’t catch from across the room, but I could tell his muscles were coiled and ready for action. It finally started to sink in that I might not be the reason why he’d come.
“Are you here to take her in?”
“No, I’m here for you.”
Maybe I’d been wrong then, but I couldn’t tell exactly what he meant by that. He still hadn’t looked me in the eye yet. “In a good way, or an I’m hauling you away in cuffs way?”
“I thought we should talk,” he said quietly and a light of hope flickered inside me.
“I could take a later flight.”
“They’ll hold the flight for you. It won’t take that long for what I have to say.”
Just as fast my hope sank. “That doesn’t sound good.”
“Come on.” Bishop cau
ght hold of my hand, leading me into a supply area for a bit of privacy and all I could think about was the feel of my hand in his. When we came to a stop, he met my gaze and I looked for a clue into what he had to say. “I know you have your reasons for why you did the things you did, and I can even understand some of them.”
“Thank you,” I breathed. That didn’t sound so bad.
“But after what you pulled tonight, I don’t know if I can ever trust you again.”
“Bishop, I…”
“No, don’t.” He looked away and I realized he was afraid I’d compel him again. “I just don’t know what’s real and what’s not.”
“I love you, that’s real. I thought you loved me too.” He didn’t say anything and I felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room. “Come back with me. We can work things out, I know we can,” I pleaded, but he still wouldn’t look at me.
“You’re talking about me leaving the Order again?”
“Why not? We need some time alone together without other stuff getting in the way. It was your idea in the first place.”
“Was it? Or was it yours?” he bit out accusingly.
“I swear the thought never once occurred to me that you might leave the Order. I was surprised when you brought it up — couldn’t you tell I was surprised?”
“I don’t know what to think anymore.” He hung his head and I reached up to stroke his cheek.
“You’re supposed to think that I love you.”
Bishop’s eyes returned to mine. “I do love you, Anja, but the last time I lost myself in love it almost killed me when it ended. I can’t help thinking it was because she compelled me too. This love… it’s not normal. It’s too much. Before you came along I was happy. I had the Order and it was all I needed. Now… you’ve got me all mixed up inside.”
“I thought you were happy with me.”
“This isn’t happiness I’m feeling right now.” The misery rolled off of him in waves and I could see how tortured he was by conflicting emotions. That wasn’t what I wanted, not at all.