by Chris Devine
“You came a long way then, on the off-chance we were still here.” Travis countered, not sure where this was going.
“It was not you we came to find.” she stated simply.
“Eh!?” Travis was confused. “Who then?”
“The Originals.”
“Original humans? But we are the only humans.” he said, a little plaintively.
“No you are not!” Travis was taken aback by the force of Xnuk Ek’’s retort. “The Originals were thriving the last time my people visited your planet, but something happened and they are all but extinct and have been replaced by you.” she finished with a sneer.
“But ….” Travis did not really understand what Xnuk Ek’ was getting at and he was not sure what he was going to say, but she cut him off before he got any further.
“At this stage in your evolution you should have put war aside, stopped worshiping mythical deities and at least be exploring your own solar system, yet you have not even got past your own moon and you continue to kill each other with increasing efficiency. Is this why you feel the need to breed with such profusion?”
“We have!” he retorted, remembering something about probes being sent to Mars and Venus only a couple of years previously.
“I mean YOU,” she retorted, jabbing a long, elegant finger at his chest, “not little mechanical toys!”
“I don’t understand any of this!” Travis banged the table and stood up. The sudden outburst caught Xnuk Ek’ by surprise. “I’m just a frigging computer salesman! I don’t know anything about Originals, science or space exploration. Hell, I didn’t even take science at school.” he waved his arms expressively. His eyes filled with emotion as he carried on. “All I know is that my family is dead, as I should be!” he banged his fists to his chest to emphasise the point. “I am supposed to be saving an alien race but I have no idea how or why. I have no family, no friends,” his voice fell to a whisper as he closed his eyes, his chin hit his chest and tears splashed on the table, “I don’t even have a photograph or anything to remember them by.” he looked up, straight into his antagonist’s eyes. “All I get from you is cryptic insults and half stories that I don’t understand.” he paused for a second. “Just what the fuck do you want from me?” he sat down heavily.
“Just as I said; an enigma.” Xnuk Ek’ replied evenly.
Travis gritted his teeth and held his temper. He was obviously not going to get a straight answer, so he changed the subject. “Why is the window blocked up?” he asked. “I’ve seen nothing but grey walls since I woke up. I’d like to see outside.”
“That is not possible.” she replied.
“Why not?”
“All windows are blanked while the ship is in hyperspace.”
“Why?” Travis pressed.
Xnuk Ek’ sighed as if she was having to explain the obvious to a petulant child. “In hyperspace there is nothing you would wish to see.”
He opened his mouth to question why not when she deftly redirected his simple thought processes again. He shook his head, looking confused for a moment and she took the opportunity to change the subject. “If you have finished, we can begin your training. I have devised a simple regime that should be enough to make you ready without causing your inadequate brain to shut down.” he looked sourly at her. She ignored him and continued. “We have an appointment with Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe ….”
“The doctor woman?” he interrupted.
“Yes,” she sighed, “Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe will teach you about your mind, and I will teach you about your body.”
“That sounds nice.” he retorted, sarcastically.
Ignoring the barb, she stood and motioned him to move away from the table. As he stood, it oozed back into the floor, taking the remnants of his meal with it. He watched it disappear with wonder. After it had gone he looked up to see Xnuk Ek’ looking impatient.
“What? This may be how you live but it’s all new to me. I don’t even know how the frigging door works.” Xnuk Ek’ cocked her head and smiled gently. Suddenly the room seemed a little brighter again. Two comfortable looking chairs replaced the table and Xnuk Ek’ motioned for him to sit in one. Just then the door chimed and slid silently open to reveal the older woman he remembered from the White Room. On impulse he stood, partially out of respect but mostly to get a look over the newcomer’s shoulder to try and see more of his new surroundings before the door shut again. He got the impression of a wide corridor, which surprised him as he thought space to be at a premium on a spaceship, so he was expecting things to be more cramped. Both women bowed respectfully to each other, then looked at Travis. Remembering his manners he imitated Xnuk Ek’’s bow, which was deeper than the older woman’s. Travis assumed correctly it was to show respect for the other’s age and experience. Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe nodded while Xnuk Ek’ raised an eyebrow and smiled appreciatively.
I can be charming and polite when I want to be. He thought. Out loud he said “Just how big is this ship?” Both women looked at him in surprise. “All I have seen while I have been here is the inside of a glass tank and this cabin. I was just curious.”
“The ship is one bakaan in length, two kalkaan wide and one kalkaan high.” Replied Xnuk Ek’.
“That means nothing to me.” he retorted. “Just how long is a ……. bakan?”
“All in good time.” Xnuk Ek’ sighed. I do not deserve this much punishment.
Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe smiled at the Paal Kanik. “Leave us to our work.”
“Yes, Nuuktak Ts’ats’aak.” Xnuk Ek’ bowed once more and left.
Once they were alone Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe motioned Travis to sit. He did so and she took the other chair.
“I see that you are still weak. I am not sure that subjecting you to the rigors you must face is wise.” The doctor’s concern was genuine. “However, Xnuk Ek’ has been instructed to make you ready, and she is honour bound to do her best.”
“Even if it means killing me?” Again. He thought. Not that the cold hearted bitch would lose any sleep over it.
“Do not underestimate the depth of Xnuk Ek’’s compassion.” the doctor admonished.
Shit! Of course! Everyone’s a fucking mind reader here.
“Never without permission.” I am beginning to see Xnuk Ek’’s problem. “But as Xnuk Ek’ has said before, you have no control over your thoughts. It is that which I have agreed to help you with.”
“Ok, now what?”
“First I must ask permission to enter your mind. Without it we cannot begin.”
“But you’ve already been in my mind.” Travis vaguely remembered her ‘touch’ while he was in the healing tank.
“Without my intervention you would have died, and my position as Ts’ats’aak allows me this one exception. For this I must ask permission.” Travis nodded his acceptance, without really understanding what was going on.
Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe smiled. “Then we begin. I will first take you on a tour of your mind, then I will show you some exercises to help you restrain your thoughts.”
Good luck! Travis thought.
Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe settled back into her chair. “Relax and close your eyes.”
“Don’t you need to touch my head or something?” he asked.
“Why would I need to do that?” she responded.
“I don’t know …. I just thought ….. nothing.” he put his head back and relaxed, as much as he could. He felt the doctor’s consciousness slip in beside his own. It was an unsettling feeling and he started to panic as he started to feel claustrophobic in his own head, but Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe touched somewhere and he started to breathe more easily. The last time this happened he had been heavily sedated, now he could feel everything.
First we must create your personal Mindscape. The woman’s voice sounded as if she had her lips against his ear. It was gentle and soothing. It is your map to help you find your way round. She continued. Everyone’s Mindscape is different so I cannot direct you. I can only augment yo
ur own thoughts. She paused for a moment before continuing. You must imagine a door, she instructed. He concentrated for a moment and saw a door. He was standing in his hall looking at his own front door. “Interesting. You know this room?” It sounded like the alien was standing next to him.
“Yes, it’s the entrance hall in my flat, my home, on Earth.” he looked to his left and saw her. She was dressed in flowing white robes with butterfly emblems around the high collars and her hair was tumbling round her shoulders like a black waterfall with grey streaks creating the foam. Her violet eyes flashed at him. She looked impossibly old and incredibly sensual.
Stop it! He admonished himself. This is wrong. He looked down at himself and saw he was wearing jeans, T shirt and trainers.
“Open the door.” she instructed. Travis felt her amusement at his confusion. He turned the door handle and opened it, expecting to see the street outside. Instead he saw blue sky with white clouds scudding overhead. Below he saw a city that looked familiar but not quite right somehow. “Now take my hand and follow.” Before he could protest, she had pulled him through the door and they were now flying over the city. He looked behind but the door had disappeared. “It will return when you need it.”
More cryptic crap. He thought.
“This is your Mindscape and the door is your way in and out. Whenever you want to leave, all you need to do is think of the door and go through.”
So, this is my brain. “Sheffield.” The word slipped out.
“I don’t understand the reference. What is a sheffield?”
“Sheffield. It’s the name of the city below.”
“This is a city from your home world?” she asked.
“Yes, well sort of. It looks like Sheffield but it’s not quite right.” he could not put his finger on it. “I came here on a field trip with school. Something to do with urban design.”
“That is the way of the Mindscape; it will form based on your own experiences, but will mould its shape to its own requirements. See the transit routes and vehicles below?” she asked, pointing.
“Yes.” he replied.
“They represent neural pathways and messages or instructions being passed from one part of your brain to another or to other parts of your body.”
“It’s very quiet. Not like Sheffield at all. No traffic jams.”
“You are in a state of relaxation. If you were under stress you would see much more activity. Over there,” she indicated a series of warehouses, “are your memories. You said to Xnuk Ek’,” he had a sudden flash of the silver haired alien, “that you had nothing from your old life. Well it is all here, and with practice you can go among them and browse your life as if you were reliving it. You can also share these memories with others as if they lived it with you, but beware; this is a very intimate procedure.” he wanted her to tell him more about this ‘memory sharing thing’ and what she meant by it being an ‘intimate procedure’, but they had passed over and were heading to the suburbs. “Here you will find your emotions: love, hate, fear, joy, envy, greed…..she pointed to houses as they flew over. With practice you will be able to exercise some control over them. You may also help others by helping them to control their emotions.” After a pause she pointed ahead of them at a building with a tall aerial and other apparatus on the roof. “Aah!" she exclaimed "This is where we need to be.”
“BBC Radio Sheffield?” Travis enquired incredulously. He recognised the building, although, like the rest of this version of Sheffield, it was ‘not quite right’ and he could see waves emanating from the aerial like the old RKO film logo.
“This is where the trouble is. Look!” she pointed at the ‘radio waves’. “You are broadcasting your thoughts to everyone. This is your chi’.” she explained, indicating the mast. Then pointing at a large box with what could only be described as a huge ear trumpet attached to the top, she added, “And this is your xikin, which allows you to hear others.” she took him down to the roof of the ‘not quite’ BBC Radio Sheffield building. Travis looked around and could not help thinking how surreal this whole thing was. He had never taken drugs in his life, except for that one joint handed to him by some hippy bird at a party. What was her name? Imogen? Jasmine? Some hippy-shit name like that. She was so high she hardly realised he was there; weirdest shag he’d ever had. He thought that this is what it must be like to be tripping on LSD; being taken on a guided tour of a representation of his mind that had been created by, well, his mind, by a sexy granny in a nightdress. He looked up and saw Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe tapping a console impatiently, so he shelved his mental meanderings and joined her. The console looked like something out of a spaceship from Flash Gordon with large dials, knobs and switches protruding everywhere.
Which part of my mind did this come from? He thought rhetorically.
“Look and learn” she instructed, ignoring him. She showed him how to switch off the broadcast of his thoughts. She showed him how to regulate his xikin so he was not always listening, or to tune out particular signals and how to tune the chi’ so he could exchange thoughts only with those he chose by searching for a particular thought signature. She told him that you could only search for those you shared a telepathic link with before, but once done you could find people over long distances. It was like searching through an address book and his only had a couple of entries, although he was surprised to note that one of the entries appeared to be nurse ‘Kylie’ from when he was in hospital. They practiced by searching for Xnuk Ek’, but she shut him out as soon as she felt his query. Still, he felt elated that he had actually achieved something and wanted to try Nurse ‘Kylie’. He had a sudden urge for the companionship of another human, even if only for a moment. Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe insisted that you cannot make a connection outside of the ship when in hyperspace and that Earth would be too far away when they reached Otoch for his capabilities. He could have spent much more time fiddling with the pseudo-controls of his own personal ‘thought telephone’ but Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe considered enough was enough and took his hand. He took a final look, trying to commit the console to memory so he could find it again when he was alone before they flew into the sky again. This time they headed for the centre of the city. There was little light here, just a few sparks here and there, and at the centre, an area of complete black. All the roads in were blocked by barriers. “These are your ‘higher functions’.” she explained.
?????
“It appears that only thirty per cent of your brain is fully active, but this seems to be normal for your planet. This area controls what you would call telekinesis as well as the ability to influence others, create objects with your mind, and heal.” My special skill.
The mention of healing reminded Travis of flying out of the crashing train. He lost concentration and started to panic. The scene below him span uncontrollably as he began to plummet to the ground. If he hit the ground of his own Mindscape, would he die?
“Think of your door!” Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe called, and they were back on the ship.
Travis looked up from his chair, eyes wide and panting.
“You should rest.” Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe was kneeling before him with a glass of water, a look of concern on her face. Travis took it gratefully and drank.
“Was that real?” he asked.
“Yes, and considering your health and your lack of training, you did very well.” she complimented.
“But you looked so….”
“How you saw me and yourself was your own impression and would bear no relation to how I envisaged you or myself.”
“So how did you ‘see’ me?” he asked.
She smiled and reached in. “Relax.”
Oh fuck, not …..he closed his eyes and she took the water from his grasp before he dropped it. In his dream he was flying over Sheffield again, but this time he had no control and could only watch, as if he was in some sort of totally immersive cinema.
While he slept, Sundaravāda Ciṭṭe took another short sortie through the Origina
l’s mind. She examined the blocked and disused pathways. This had been done deliberately and a long time ago. It was as if the mental growth of his whole race had been deliberately stunted, but there was so much potential here. And there, right in the centre, was the reason for this expedition: the difference between life and slow extinction for the whole Xi Scorpii race. But to get to it without killing him would mean repairing the blocked neural pathways. So much power just waiting to be released. But if unleashed without the proper training, it would not only overload his brain and kill him, but it would also be catastrophic for anyone and anything within the vicinity, and the cure would be lost. She withdrew. Maybe the young Paal Ka’nsah was not the best person to be instructing him. It was not just her attitude towards the Original, but this would take all the skills of a full Nuuktak Ka’nsah. She would have to take advice before proceeding.
After Xnuk Ek’ left the alien’s cabin, she made her way to the recreation deck where she had promised to meet some of the other Paal Kaniks. She did not envy the Ts’ats’aak’s task and she had no wish to go wading around in the fetid ta'kuba of its mind. She made a face to herself and pushed the thought to the back of her mind.
It seemed so long since she had had a recreational period, and the further away she got from the alien’s cabin the lighter her mood became; she fairly skipped down the corridor as if the ship’s gravity was malfunctioning around her. She smiled at other crew members as the floor steered her at a fast trot towards the bounce tubes. She felt as if a great burden had been lifted from her shoulders and she was on her way to see her favourite lover, the thought of which broadened her smile further.
Lak’in was a Paal Kanik from Xi Scorpii C like herself, and similar to her own age and experience. She enjoyed his company and he was at least equal to her skills in the Gaming Centre, plus they usually paired off for sex later; a good session of combat games tended to make for intense and very enjoyable sex. She smiled to herself at the vision that rose in her mind. He was definitely skilled in that department! She increased her speed in anticipation.