“Perhaps,” she sighed.
Rafael didn’t notice the sly little smile that touched her lips as she slid off him.
He wet a cloth with cool water from the ceramic basin that sat on the top of his chest and returned to the bed. He stopped at the bottom and stared.
Gaby lay stretched out, her arms above her head, her legs spread apart enticingly. He couldn’t help but smile. She was like no other woman he had ever met. She may have been nervous and unsure at first but she had soon turned playful, unpredictable, demanding, and not the least inhibited about making love with him.
He pushed her legs further apart to make room for him to sit on the bed right between them. He watched her face as he touched her between her thighs gently with the cloth. She squeezed her eyes shut, moaned and squirmed provocatively.
He continued watching her and touching until the cloth itself was hot in his hand. He threw it aside and leaned over her, kissing her belly. “Does it still pain you?”
“Yes, Rafael, I am in pain,” —she sighed— “such terrible pain.”
He kissed her belly again, lower this time. “My poor, querida. What can I do to make it better?”
She raised her head and looked at him. “I-I don’t know.”
“Perhaps if I kiss it I will make it feel better,” he whispered and lowered his head between her legs.
Gaby dropped her head back and at that moment thought she had died and gone to heaven.
~~~
Gaby saw the distant light through the window. Dawn would soon be upon them and the night would be left to memories. She lifted Rafael’s hand to slip out from under his arm. She quietly left his bed and gathered her clothes, putting them on with haste.
She walked over to the bed and looked down at him. He slept so peacefully. She touched her two fingers to her lips and then brought them down to press lightly against his.
“I love you,” she whispered. “I will always love you.”
She turned and hurried to the door, slipping the lock across as quietly as possible. She turned back to take one last look. Her eyes roamed over his body stretched on his side, drinking in every last detail of him, from the curl on his forehead to the thick muscles of his chest she had slept on, to his powerful arms that had held her so tight, to his long legs that had snuggled with hers, and to his firm, sculpted buttocks she had playfully patted. Tears came to her eyes and she fought them.
It was your choice. The words screamed in her head, and she turned, opened the door, and walked out.
Chapter Seventeen
“Where is she?”
Lupe’s head snapped up in surprise, not having heard Don Rafael enter. He did not look happy. His posture was stiff, his lips set tight, and his dress impeccable. He was annoyed, no doubt about it. He always wore that air of arrogance every time something irritated him. And Lupe was pretty certain who the irritant was, so she trod carefully. “Who are you looking for, Don Rafael?”
“Gaby!” he said with more emphasis then he had intended.
“She’s gathering eggs for me,” Lupe continued, hoping to alter his mood. “She must have had a wonderful time last night. She’s in such good spirits this morning, smiling, humming cheerful tunes, and looking radiant. Yes, last night did her good.”
Rafael grew more annoyed with each word. He had hoped to be awake before she left his quarters. He had wanted to make certain she was all right, that she harbored no regrets, felt no remorse for what had passed between them. Evidently, from Lupe’s description of her joyous mood, she didn’t.
Why the thought irritated him he couldn’t say, but it did, very much so. He had thought he would have found her seeking solace in her quarters, perhaps even fighting tears, or sleeping, exhausted physically and drained emotionally from the night they had spent together. But here she was feeling wonderful.
“She should be back in about ten minutes. Shall I send her to your study?” Lupe asked, noticing an even heavier shadow of annoyance descend over his already black expression.
“Don’t bother,” he said and walked out.
Lupe shrugged and made a mental note to warn Gaby to keep her distance from Don Rafael today. He was obviously in a bad mood, and Lupe’s inquiring mind couldn’t help but wonder what had caused it.
~~~
Gaby spoke softly to the hens as she plucked the eggs from beneath them. They cackled, and some protested with a flap of their wings, but they soon settled and allowed her to go about her business.
The henhouse door was ajar, letting in just enough of the early morning light for Gaby to see what she was doing. She was glad for the solitude. She had smiled and acted her usual cheerful self, perhaps even a bit more cheerful than usual, since she had bid Lupe good morning.
It had taken all her strength not to fall into a crying heap on her bed in her room. She hurt so badly, not physically, but emotionally. To taste something that could never be hers was unbearable. It cut at her heart, deeper and deeper, until numbness took over and she finally realized that she had no choice, she would have to go on.
She had made her choice and could blame no one. Therefore, she would suffer in silence, no one would know, ever... unless.
She placed her hand flat against her stomach. What if he had left her with child? What then?
“Are you all right?”
Gaby shut her eyes against the soft concern in his voice. She couldn’t let him see her hurt, her worry. She turned with her usual flourish and a smile. “Of course.”
Her response had started vibrantly, but trailed off slowly as she saw him standing in the doorway. His strong silhouette, the morning sun glaring behind him, flooded her with thoughts of the night before. She was glad for the cover of the darkened room, for he could not see the blush that rose to tinge her cheeks.
Rafael walked in, almost closing the door behind him, leaving only a small opening for the sunlight to penetrate. “I had wished to speak with you before you left my room.”
“About what?” Gaby asked, clutching the basket of eggs she held in her one hand.
“About last night,” he said, stepping closer.
Gaby looked up into his eyes, so blue, so hot, so tempting. She stiffened and steeled herself against the words she knew she had to speak. “There is nothing to discuss. I made my choice. I have no regrets.”
Rafael didn’t want to hear those words. He wanted her to tell him that she cared for him and wanted him, needed him as he did her. He didn’t want only last night; he wanted every night with her.
He curbed his disappointment and spoke. “It was your first time. It can be painful in more ways than one, and I didn’t wish you to feel pain.”
Gaby felt her heartstrings being plucked, but she could not allow his concern to bend her resolve. One night she had promised herself and one night only. To ask for more would only be asking for trouble.
With willpower she had thought long gone; she stepped forward and gently placed her hand on his arm. His muscles tightened beneath her touch and sent gooseflesh rushing up her arm.
“Rafael.”
Her voice was so buttery soft that Rafael’s whole body stiffened in expectation.
“You gave me a choice last night. The decision was mine. I knew the consequences and I accepted them. And as I told you, I have no regrets. How could I, when you gave me a night full of beautiful memories I shall cherish forever. There is nothing more I want from you, Rafael. You’ve given me more than I thought possible.”
Rafael was stunned, a foreign reaction to him. He had been through much in his life, learned to deal with all types of sorrow and pain, but never—never had he experienced such a sense of sorrow and loss. She was releasing him, demanding nothing, and thanking him for the night of love they had shared.
He hurt... more badly then he could ever remember.
Gaby yawned then. A small fake yawn and the only way she could think of to hold her tears in check.
Rafael’s hand touched her cheek. “You have not slept,
querida?”
Gaby felt her body melt, her legs grow weak, and her heart hammer. “I’m not tired. It’s just the heat and darkness of this henhouse,” she lied.
Rafael’s finger caressed her cheek and skimmed across her lips. He ached to take her in his arms, carry her to his bed, make love to her slowly, tenderly, and then hold her until she fell asleep.
Dios Mio, he wanted her again. Would his ache for her never stop?
He pulled his hand away quickly and stepped back. “Rest after you tend my mother.”
“Si, Don Rafael,” she answered, realizing the wall that had separated them had once more been erected.
Rafael clenched his hands and left the henhouse in haste.
Gaby bit her bottom lip against the heartfelt pain. A single tear trickled down her cheek and was soon followed by more. She let them flow freely as she resumed collecting the eggs.
“You will heal,” she whispered. “You will heal.”
She shook her head against her own reassuring words. “You fool. You will not heal. You cannot. You love him.”
~~~
Rafael stormed through the hacienda, slamming doors as he went. Servants hid in darkened corners and many crossed themselves as he passed them. He entered his study and swung the door closed with a mighty force that knocked the swords off the wall outside his door.
He was full of wrath and did not know where to direct it. His fist came down upon the desk not once but twice.
“Damn her!” he yelled.
She had accepted what had passed between them with kindness and tolerance—even with thankfulness. She wasn’t full of tears or regrets. She hadn’t demand anything. She wanted nothing from him... nothing.
He took a deep breath, fighting for control of his warring emotions. He should be relieved, happy, but he wasn’t. What was it he expected from her?
He walked around his desk and dropped into his seat, pushing his head back to rest against the thick wood. Why did he feel this way? Why did he feel the regret and not Gaby? Why?
You love her, you fool!
The words whistled through his head like a siren.
“Impossible,” he whispered.
Why?
“She’s—she’s—”
She’s different, full of life and love. She’s what you always wanted in a wife.
“Impossible,” he repeated in a whisper.
“Why?”
“Too much stands in our way.”
Only one thing stands in your way.
“One thing?”
Yes.
“What?” he asked himself.
Your stupid, foolish pride!
~~~
Gaby had tried all day to find time to rest. Her body had begun to protest her lack of sleep around noon. She had hoped by siesta time she would be able to join the others and rest, not that she ever did before, but today she found it necessary. Unfortunately Dona Maria wasn’t tired enough to sleep. She was too weary to read herself, however, so she set Gaby to the task.
Suppertime proved just as difficult, since Dona Maria decided to have a tray brought to her room and Rafael summoned a tray to his study. Gaby was busy running back and forth between them both.
“You look exhausted,” Lupe said, taking the cloth from Gaby’s hands and pushing her down into a chair.
Gaby sighed gratefully.
Lupe took over the job of drying the dishes. “Go to bed. It isn’t necessary for you to help me here. A few more dishes to wash and dry and I’ll be done. And Dona Maria is all settled for the night.”
Gaby was about to stand when a young boy came bursting through the door.
“Lupe!” he said in a raised voice. “Come quick, Anita is in pain.”
Lupe shook her head. “I’ve warned her and warned her to stay off her feet. She’s stubborn and foolish, and she’ll be lucky if she doesn’t lose this baby.”
“Yes, but you will help her anyway,” Gaby said and then yawned.
“You go to bed,” Lupe ordered, gathering some clean cloths and jars of herbs.
“I’ll finish the dishes for you first.”
“Nonsense, I’ll see to them when I’m done with Anita.”
Gaby stood. “No, you’ll probably be all night with her. I will finish here and then go straight to bed. I promise.”
Lupe smiled and gave Gaby’s hand a gentle squeeze. “You are a good girl.”
“Go, go,” Gaby said, shooing her out the door.
She turned to the task at hand, yawning with each wipe of the dish.
~~~
Rafael saw the light in the cookhouse as he passed through the arches of the hacienda on the way to his room. It was late. Lupe should be in her quarters by now.
Rafael stood in the doorway, staring at Gaby. She sat at the table sound asleep, her arms pillowing her head. The clean dishes were neatly stacked on the table ready to be put away.
He walked over to her and bent down beside her. “You are stubborn, querida,” he whispered and pulled the cloth from her hand, leaving it by the stacked dishes.
He slipped one arm under her legs and the other around her waist and stood with her cradled in his arms. Her arms sought his neck and her head his chest. She snuggled against him in comfort and he smiled.
He made certain no one was about, keeping to the shadows of the night so no one would see them. He slipped into her room. The illumination from the bright moon cast enough of a pale light through her window for him to see her bed.
He placed her on it and was prepared to leave immediately, until...
“Rafael.”
He knew she whispered his name in her sleep. Her eyes were closed and her arms hugged her middle.
“Rafael.”
Her voice was full of passion and unrequited desire. He told himself to leave that she was only dreaming. Still, though, she was dreaming of him.
He sat beside her on the narrow bed. “Gaby,” he murmured, and she hugged herself tighter.
He smiled, ran his hand beneath her skirt and leaned over her, gently pressing his lips against hers.
Gaby felt his fingers touching her, felt his hot flesh against hers, felt his mouth tasting hers. He felt so real, no dream phantom, but true flesh and blood.
She didn’t want the dream to end. She wanted Rafael to go on touching her, kissing her, making her throb for the want of him. She’d be sorry when she woke, but now she wanted this, needed it.
“Don’t leave me, Rafael,” she begged. “Keep touching me, kissing me, please.”
His breath was hot against her nipples as he complied with her plea. She moaned and arched her back, aching to feel the strength of him inside her.
“I want you,” she said. “I want you.”
“And I want you,” he whispered, “but not asleep. Open your eyes and look at me.”
She fought her way out of her dream state. He lay over her naked, staring down at her.
“I’m not a dream, querida, I’m real.”
Her eyes opened wider, with fear or anticipation Rafael wasn’t certain.
“I—I—”
Rafael slipped off her to the end of the bed, his body hidden in the shadows. “You do not know your own mind. I will not force you.”
Gaby felt hurt, deserted.
“How—how did you—I get here—naked?”
“You were sleeping at the table. I carried you here. You called out to me and I could not help but touch you and undress you.”
Gaby heard the raw desire in his voice, felt her own need for him. “Rafael,” she whispered, but this time it wasn’t in sleep she called out to him.
“Come here to me,” he said softly.
She entered the shadows, and his hands circled her waist, lifting her slightly.
“Wrap your legs around me,” he ordered.
“I can’t, I—”
“Do as I say.”
His voice was so urgent, so demanding that she obeyed.
He was sitting on the edge of the bed, his
feet firmly on the floor as she slipped her legs around him.
“Good,” he whispered, lifting her higher, then bringing her slowly down upon him.
Gaby braced her hands on his shoulders as she slid down on him taking the full length and size of him inside her. She was wet and ready, and he fit perfectly.
“Tell me it feels good, querida,” he said as he nipped at her bare throat.
“It feels good.”
“How good?” he asked, moving her body up and down slowly.
“Ve—ry go—od,” she breathed with each movement.
“Then I shouldn’t stop?” he teased, tasting her plump bottom lip.
“No, no, don’t stop,” she begged, enjoying the ride.
“I won’t,” he whispered, “as long as you keep telling me how good it feels.”
Gaby told him and kept telling him until they burst together in a furious union, and she fell exhausted against him.
Rafael held her in his arms, both their breathing heavy and uneven. She fell asleep there, cradled against him and with him still inside her.
He lifted her off him, and she didn’t protest. She didn’t even speak. He placed her on the bed and was about to pull the covers over her when he thought better of it. He searched for a nightgown and with only a bit of difficulty got it on her. He then pulled the covers over her.
Quickly he dressed, then knelt beside her bed. He pushed the stray strands of hair away from her eyes and cheeks. His fingers touched her lips, puffy and red from his demanding kisses.
Rafael’s expression grew bleak as he stared down at her. What was he going to do? One night, two nights, not even fifty nights with her would be enough. He wanted a lifetime.
Good God! He was in love with a peasant girl and a thief. A smile faded his frown. He was in love? He had played with the strange thought in his mind. At first he assumed it was lust, nothing more. But if it was lust, he’d want nothing more than to bed her as often as possible, although the thought appealed to him, it wasn’t his only thought. He found himself full of rage and fury when another man spoke with her. He often sought her out during the day just to look upon her smile. There was a brightness about her that was contagious. His spirits always lifted when she was about. She had returned life and love to the hacienda.
Untamed Fire Page 18