by Liam Brown
Patience.
One day we will all be gone. The cars will rust, the buildings will crumble. And nature will be there, waiting, ready to fill the void, to swallow our carnage and reclaim the land, until there is no trace of us at all.
Until we are but a dream.
*
I have added more plants to my modest indoor garden. Chilli peppers, aubergines, a few herbs. They crowd my windowsill, so that I can no longer shut the curtains. I do my best to care for them, watering them regularly, feeding them fertiliser, turning them to make sure they get enough light. Whether they will ever fruit is anyone’s guess. I’m vaguely aware that at some point in the not too distant future I’ll need to repot them, to plant them outside. Beyond that though, I have no idea. At the park there was always someone to tell me what to do. Now it’s just me.
One of my plants died last week. One of the chillies. I don’t know what happened. I treated it the same as all the others, but it just stopped growing. The leaves went brown and it shrivelled to nothing. I threw it out in the rubbish the next day.
I’m scared that the same will happen to the rest of them. I even went to the library and took out a few books on gardening. That only made it worse. There’s so much to consider, so much that can go wrong. Fungus. Disease. Pests. No matter what I do, they’ll always be under threat from something. Life is so fragile. I try my best, but the truth is I’m making it up as I go along.
But I’m learning. I’m learning.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Huge thanks go to the following:
My complicated and unwieldy family
My early readers/confidants/counsellors: Mum, Dad, Aidan, Ciara, Fiona, Lauren
Also special thanks to Michael Langan, whose comments and suggestions on the embryonic drafts of this novel almost a decade ago (!) still resonate today
Adelle Stripe & Ben Myers for their friendship, encouragement and support, Jonathan Davidson and all at Writing West Midlands, all at Room 204 (past, present and future!), Aki Schilz and all at TLC, Riz at RK Animation, Gem Sidnell at Moo Moo Art & Photography, Sam Mills & Thom Cuell at Dodo Ink, Marek at Almond Press, Roz at West Midlands Readers’ Network, LossLit Magazine, Bare Fiction Magazine, Rob Burgon for his advice on self-defence, John Oakley for his comments about ‘hope’, Freelance Mourners, Birmingham Central Library (where large portions of this book were written), the nice people at Birmingham City Council Parks Department for not having me arrested
Independent bookshops/publishers
Readers everywhere
Wind, rain, mud
Extra special thanks to Tom, Lauren, Lottie, Lucy, Rob and all at Legend Press for their hard work and continued faith in my writing
Finally, to Simone, without whom none of this would have been possible. Until our jetpacks fail.
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