by Mj Fields
“Tessa, come on baby… I’m tired,” he mumbled.
He woke up and looked at her sleeping he bent down and kissed her.
“I love you, baby.”
“You turned me down,” she pulled the covers over her head.
“Sorry, I was tired,” he said, “I’m up now.”
“And I’m tired” she rolled over. “Have a good day, I love you anyway.”
“Tessa, don’t be mad,” he rubbing his hand softly down her back.
“I’m not, I have to be up in an hour for work, see you later,” she covered herself.
~
Lucas walked into work, “Hey Jade taped Tessa singing last night, do you want to see?”
“Sure,” he said confused.
Her phone chimed, and it was him
-Nice performance last night Tessa…LL
-It would have been if you didn’t tell me NO…LT
-No baby, at the fair…LL
-Oh I forgot I was going to tell you last night but well you were tired and this morning I wasn’t thinking about that AT ALL, feeling rejected…LT
- I’ll make it up to you baby, I can come home if you want…LL
-I wanted last night, not now…LT
-I’m not going to live this one down am I…LL
-NO!!! Don’t do that to me again, you made me this way! I’m going to work see you later…LT
-Baby I think it’s you…still sorry, see you tonight…LL
Tessa came home and made dinner and showered. Lucas walked in with a bag and flowers.
“Hello baby, I brought you gifts,” he licked his lips and bit his lip. Tessa smiled and he handed her the bag.
“What the hell is this?” she asked shocked.
“Toys,” he looked her up and down.
“So this is what I am supposed to do when you turn me down? I don’t think so,” she shoved the bag at him and walked away.
“No, you better not, they’re for us,” he laughed and grabbed her.
“No, thank you I prefer the real thing,” she snapped, “When it’s available. I understand tired and I have been a baby about it today, but that stuff is not happening.”
“Okay baby, I’m sorry.”
He laughed as he walked out of the room and up the stairs.
He took the bag and shoved it in the back of the closet.
He walked downstairs and looked at her.
“Am I in the doghouse?”
"You weren't, but now you are," she scowled at him.
“I should’ve taken you with me shopping, huh?” he smirked while he turned to walk out of the living room.
She threw a magazine at him.
Lucas turned around stalked back to her. He picked her up off the couch and threw her over his shoulder and grabbed the magazine and smacked her on the butt.
“Put me down!” Her voice broke and he put her down, and there were tears in her eyes. She stormed away.
Lucas grabbed her, “Talk to me, damn it!”
“I don’t know…I don’t know why…” she hugged him.
"Okay that's better," he held her. “You're seriously not pissed at me are you?”
“No, not about last night, those things though, not cool,” she laughed.
He pulled back and looked at her, “Now you’re laughing?”
“Yes, I’m very moody today,” she put her head on his chest.
After she had forced to calm herself down she looked up at him and he was looking at her apprehensively.
“Sorry?”
He smiled, "We good now?”
She shook her head yes and stepped back.
“Can we eat?”
They finished eating, and he cleaned up. Tessa did some homework, and he sat and read the newspaper next to her.
She was getting tired. She shut off the computer and stood up,
“I’m going to bed,” she kissed his head.
She showered and got into bed. A few minutes later came up and did the same. He lay next to her and wrapped his arms around her.
“I love you, anyway,” he smirked.
“What?” she laughed.
“You know even though you’re crazy.”
She tried to pull away from him, and he laughed and held her tighter. She didn’t fight, she was tired.
“It’s been five months today, Lucas,” she whispered.
He thought for a minute, “Oh.”
She rolled over and hugged him.
He kissed her. “Sorry baby.”
“Me too,” she closed her eyes fell asleep.
He couldn’t sleep. He didn’t know how to make this better for her or him for that matter. He thought about David, and wondered how Sadi was doing. He got up and went downstairs. He logged onto her facebook account and checked to see if he could go through one of Tessa’s friends page’s to hers. It worked. Sadi was going to school up at Syracuse, and he had not run into her, he hadn’t even thought about her until now. She was in a relationship, and he was happy for her. Her posts were upbeat and very positive. He got up to get a drink and walked back in. Tessa was standing in front of the computer and looked shocked.
Oh Fuck, he thought. “Tessa, I just wanted to know how she was doing.”
“Okay, well I hope she is doing well,” she looked at him as tears welled up in her eyes.
She ran upstairs into what would have been her baby’s room and locked the door. She lay on the bed and cried.
“Tessa, open the door please,” he said. “Let me explain”
She didn’t answer him she put her ear buds in and cried herself to sleep.
He tossed and turned as he tried to go to sleep and couldn’t. He grabbed a wired hanger and popped the lock on the door to the room she was sleeping in. He looked at the bed and saw her laying there. He knew he had crossed a line today and even if he explained it to her she probably would still be hurt, and he could blame her. He walked into their room and went to sleep.
In the morning, he wrote a note and left it on the counter.
Tessa,
I’m sorry. You have every right to be upset with me. After you fell asleep I started thinking of David. I just wanted to see if she was doing alright.
It was poor timing on my part, and very insensitive. Please accept my apology, I love you forever.
Love,
Lucas.
PS, Please come to lunch today.
She read the letter and took a shower.
His phone chimed, and it was her.
-I accept your apology and am sorry that our loss reminds you of yours with her. I truly understand that in my head. I will not lie-- it hurt like hell. I won’t be able to make it to lunch. I have three days off and am planning to go to my parents to help get ready for Molly’s baby shower. I’m working with Kendall tonight. I shouldn’t be too late. I love you…LT
-I understand, sorry again..LL
She drove to the farm and texted him
-I’m home, I think I will stay tonight if you want to come you can..LT
He didn’t text her back, great she thought.
After finishing the shower favors, Tessa decided to go for a walk with Chewy. She sat next to the falls, thinking as he splashed in the water. She knew it shouldn’t be a big deal and was sure she was even more emotional because Molly was going to have a baby. She couldn’t do that, she knew it wasn’t meant to be, making her wonder about everything else that had happened with she and Lucas in the past. She decided to suck it up, “Come on Chewy.”
Tessa showered to get ready for the fair. She worked with Kendall and was having fun. She saw all her old friends and chatted about college and life. Of course everyone asked her how she and Lucas were doing.
Her phone chimed it was him
-You look so happy right now Tessa. If I come see you will that make you sad?...LL
He stood back and watched from the crowd. He saw her browse turn in and she pinched the bridge of her nose.
-Guess that answers my question, I’m going to
head back baby, be happy…LL
-You better get back here Lucas !...LT
Lucas walked up with his head down, and he looked up through his long lashes at her. "Hi," he said softly.
“Hi to you,” she smiled, “Why don’t you come back and help?”
“Alright,” he walked around to the back.
“Are you okay?” she asked him as he looked around lost.
“Yes are you?”
“I’m having fun, come on,” she threw him an apron “Suit up, Links.”
There tent quickly became the busiest one at the fair, from all the girls middle through high school checking him out, all the way to the die hard SU fans. They sold out of everything before closing. They were cleaning up when Tessa saw Sadi walk up to the booth. Great, she thought. She looked at Lucas, and he looked down and shook his head. Great he thought, she is going to think this was my doing.
“We’re closing up, all sold out,” Kendall told her.
“I wanted to talk to Lucas,” Sadi said calmly.
“Lucas, you have a visitor.”
He looked at Tessa.
“Go,” she said and looked away.
“Hi Lucas. I wanted you to meet someone, this is my boyfriend Seth”
Lucas looked up. Seth had grey eyes, and shoulder length messy hair. He was attractive but completely different from her typical type.
Lucas put his hand out and shook his.
“Nice to meet you,” he said. “Tessa, come here please.”
She walked over.
“Tessa this is Seth, my boyfriend,” Sadi smiled.
“Nice to meet you,” Tessa nodded.
“When you two are done, could you give us a minute?” Seth asked politely.
“Sure,” Lucas answered.
“You go ahead Lucas, I have nothing to say to her,” she whispered.
“Tessa, please,” she took a deep breath, and he grabbed her hand, “Thank you.”
They sat across the table from them; Tessa looked down avoiding eye contact.
“Tessa, I’m sorry” Sadi’s voice broke, “I truly am.”
Seth put his arm around Sadi. “I got this. Sadi and I met at the beginning of last year. She and I have had many talks about what you have all been through. She feels pretty bad about everything. Her hope, our hope, is that she can put this behind her. She knows she was awful to you, Tessa. And Lucas, you both did some pretty rotten things to each other, but Sadi knows how wrong she was for what happened a year and a half ago. We stopped at the cemetery tonight, and she saw the flowers you’d left…today I think. She knows she hurt you, and she just wants you to know that. If you could forgive her, she could more easily move on.”
“I forgive her, is she still seeing a therapist?” he asked Seth.
“Actually she is doing much better,” Seth retorted defensively.
“Lucas,” Tessa whispered.
“What Tessa?” Lucas snapped at her.
She looked down.
“I’m sorry;" he said and lifted her chin. “I’m sorry.”
“Well we just needed to put this behind us, do you have anything else Sadi?” Seth asked.
“Tessa I’m so sorry. I understand now what made him fall in love with you. I swear I have met a male version of you. He just wants me to be happy, and he loves me regardless of what has happened in my past. I’m so sorry, please forgive me,” Sadi pleaded.
Tessa looked up and smiled, “I do Sadi, and I forgive you.”
Sadi stood up and walked around the table and hugged her.
“I really am sorry I was such a monster to you,” she said. “I hope you two are as happy as we are.”
Tessa smiled, “I’m happy for you.”
They said there goodbyes and Tessa nodded to the booth. When they finished cleaning up, they all left. Lucas followed Tessa and Kendall to the farm. Kendall started the hot tub. Alex and Phoebe pulled in and ran inside to change.
“I think I’m going to head back to our place,” Lucas said when Tessa walked up to him.
She looked at him, “Really?”
“Or I could stay here, and wait for you to go off on me,” he lifted his chin high.
“Lucas I…” she started and stopped. She started to walk away and waved her hand, “Do whatever you need to do.”
He peeled out of the driveway as Tessa watched out the kitchen window, wanting to cry.
Tessa joined her siblings and Phoebe in the hot tub. They talked and laughed. Tessa got out and checked her phone, he hadn’t texted.
She walked in the bathroom and showered. She threw on her clothes and walked out into the kitchen and helped her mom make salads for the shower.
Her phone chimed:
-hope everything is alright. Lucas is here and in bed, he looks pretty upset…Jade
-glad he is safe; yeah we have had a rough couple days. Go figure. I’ll see you guys at the shower in the morning. I’ll talk to you then…Tessa
~
Tessa woke up and showered. She helped her mom load everything up and headed to camp.
Everything looked great, and people were pulling in. She greeted family and friends, some that she hadn’t seen in awhile. She heard a call pulling down the dirt road and turned hoping it was him. She saw an unfamiliar vehicle. Troy got out and opened the door she saw Carmen was with him. She ran over and hugged her.
“Hello you two,” she smiled. “You ready to meet the family?”
Tessa watched the way Troy looked at her and was happy for him. Jade and Ryan pulled in. She smiled hoping to see Lucas not far behind. She missed him. Ben’s family rolled in next, and he smiled when she looked at him.
"Hey Tess, looking hot as usual," he hugged her. “Where’s your boy, I saw your interview on TV, you pulled that off very well.”
“So what have you been up to? I’ve missed your face Ben,” Tessa smiled.
“Not much, first year over. I am going to study in Europe next year, that’s pretty exciting,” Ben smiled.
She felt her face fall, and he laughed.
“Tessa Ross, what’s up with that look?” he smiled smugly.
“Nothing Ben. It’ll just be weird not seeing you at camp, that’s all” she laughed and slugged him in the arm.
The party had gone on for an hour and still no Lucas. She walked up to Jade.
“Where is he?” she asked.
“I don’t know, he mentioned that you may not want him here,” Jade said cautiously.
“Seriously? If he doesn’t show up to my sister’s shower, I may not want him here ever again,” Tessa stormed off.
Ben watched her walk away and ran up to her, “Trouble in paradise, girl?”
“Isn’t there always?” she said and immediately regretted it.
“Still not happy, huh?”
“No, I am it’s just… I don’t know… I know I love him-- I just act terrible sometimes and he always ends up acting worse,” she said looking at the ground.
“Tess, if you look at my ass you’ll feel better,” Tessa smiled and they both laughed.
They started walking back towards the party.
“Just seeing your face is enough, I miss you,” she admitted.
“I know,” Ben smiled.
Tessa helped keep trays full and played with baby Luke. He was getting so big. Finally music was playing and she danced with Lukie, and he laughed.
“You could make the whole world happy, little man,” she said and spun around with him.
“It’s almost feeding time Lukie,” Jade took him from Tessa, “Sorry.”
She looked up and saw Lucas pulling down the driveway. She immediately got annoyed. Ben saw her face and laughed.
“Shut up,” she laughed at Ben.
Lucas walked up with a basket full of gifts. He looked at her if you weren’t such an ass you would look so damn hot right now, she thought. She turned and walked away.
“Tessa, he’s here,” Jade said, “Better late than never.”
“Did you ca
ll him Jade?”
“No I didn’t call him,” Jade said and quickly walked away.
Lucas put the gifts by the table and walked over to Ryan, “Thanks for the heads up, man.”
He walked over to Tessa.
“Nice of you to show up,” she snapped.
“I’m here, aren’t I?” he asked.
“You’re lucky you are or this would have been done, this is my family Lucas. If you’re with me, they’re MVP’s do you understand that?”
He looked at her and raised his eyebrow.
“If this is how things are going to be today, I won’t be here long,” he looked her straight in the eyes. “Do you understand that?”
She didn’t expect that, and she was hurt. She turned and walked away.
“Hello Lucas,” Troy said.
"Hey look at you two," he hugged them both, “How long are you staying?”
“We have to be back in four days, Carmen has classes to teach, and I have a real job now, things are changing. I’m even thinking about going to college,” he laughed and hugged Carmen.
“Where are you two staying? We have a place up in Syracuse and two spare bedrooms if you guys want you could stay with us,” Lucas offered.
“Is that alright with you?” Troy asked Carmen.
“Sounds great,” Carmen smiled.
The party went marvelously. Tessa and Lucas avoided each other the entire day. Tessa was sitting with baby Luke in a chair, rocking him as he slept.
“You look happy with him in your arms, how are you Tess?” Ben asked as he knelt down next to her.
“I’m okay,” she whispered.
“This can’t be easy, I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
A tear fell, and he wiped it away. Lucas stood and watched the exchange and was immediately aggravated.
“Until I think about it, it’s fine,” Tessa forced a smile.
“It’s only been six months girl, you’ll get there,” Ben said gently.
She couldn’t believe he knew that. Lucas didn’t even remember.
“Thank you,” she looked confused.
“Ross-- you’ll be an amazing mom someday, don’t you dare rush it, okay? Please. Your future children deserve the best they can get Tess and-- well please just wait, figure you out first,” Ben eyes filled with deep concern.