by Mari Carr
All the emotions came streaming out—having been bottled up for too long. For the longest time, Jack simply held her until the crying and shaking subsided. Finally, with the tears spent, she slept.
Hayley awoke to the sound of whispers. Disoriented, she tried to discern where she was without opening her eyes. Two male voices. Then, in the distance, a door closed and the voices stopped. Wilshire’s leering face, Rawlings’ rough hands, the knife—all the memories came back in a rush.
“Jack!” Hayley bolted up in the bed.
“I’m here,” came his deep voice beside her.
Jack sat in the chair beside her, looking concerned. Blushing, she realized the sheet covering her was pooled around her waist. She was completely naked. Quickly, she grasped it and pulled it to her chin. He gave her a familiar teasing grin and started to make a joke, but seemed to change his mind before speaking. She sensed his hesitance and regretted the loss of his good-natured teasing.
“Don’t,” she said softly.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t treat me differently. I’m not different. What were you going to say?” Her tone was challenging, yet tentative.
After only the briefest hesitation, he smiled. “I was going to say it’s a little late to be modest. I have been swimming with you.”
Hayley smiled at his response.
“However, perhaps you would be more comfortable with something to wear.” He rose, found a large shirt in a trunk, and gently pulled it over her arms, buttoning it up. “How are you feeling? Are you in pain?”
Blushing slightly at the intimacy of Jack dressing her and the memory of his care from the previous night, she glanced down at her body and took stock of her injuries. “Not pain really. Just sore—all over. I don’t think I said thank you for all you did last night. Was there someone else here a minute ago? I thought I heard another voice.”
“Oh, that was Rogers. I asked him to hold lunch for a while. It’s quite late, but I thought perhaps you would like to sleep longer. I can ring for him if you’re famished.”
“No, I’m not hungry. Actually, I feel a bit queasy. I’ll just stay in bed a little longer if you don’t mind.” She settled her back against the headboard.
“Of course I don’t mind. Do you feel up to a bath? I promised you one last night.”
Heat rose in her cheeks as she remembered Jack giving her a sponge bath. Looking at him, she realized he was remembering as well. “Not yet. I don’t feel up to much of anything. I’m—” Hayley stopped, suddenly shaking her head.
“You’re what?” Jack coaxed, obviously aware she was holding something in.
“I’m afraid,” she confessed, despite the discomfort she felt at admitting a weakness. “I’ve never felt so afraid. He…” She couldn’t bring herself to say the earl’s name and just the thought of him caused her heart to race. Jack didn’t respond, but simply looked into her eyes and waited for her to continue.
Uncomfortable under his probing stare, she looked away. Her hands were gripping the sheet tightly around her. Her knuckles were white. There were scratches around her wrists left by the ropes. “He wanted me to be afraid,” she whispered. “My fear—that was what he wanted most of all. Men like him only feel powerful when they’ve made the people around them powerless.”
She was referring to her father as much as his uncle.
Jack pulled her face up until she looked him in the eye. “This isn’t the Hayley I know. Are you saying he succeeded?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, I do,” he said harshly. “He didn’t. You fought him, Hayley. You fought him in spite of the odds being stacked against you. You never gave up or waited for someone to rescue you. You never stopped believing you could survive. You’re the most incredible woman I’ve ever met. You are beautiful, intelligent, and strong. That’s who you are. Who you were last night and who you are now. Wilshire didn’t change that. Your father didn’t change that. No one on earth could go through what you did and come through so valiantly. So, no, he didn’t break you or take away your power.” Without waiting for her response, he softly kissed her bruised lips. Then, gently, he laid her back on the bed and pulled the covers up. “Sleep some more, firebrand.”
Hayley closed her eyes and fell into another deep, dreamless sleep.
For four days, Hayley drifted in and out of sleep. Jack began to wonder if she was in shock from her attack. She’d never been able to sit still for more than a few minutes at a time and yet now, she didn’t have the strength to leave the room. Erin came to visit every morning, helping her bathe and keeping her company.
They’d all agreed Hayley should remain at his townhouse until she’d had time to fully recover. There were still several family members and friends staying at the Grange following the house party. Hayley was unwilling to face them and answer questions about her bruised face, so Alex and Erin claimed Hayley’s aunt had arrived from America to begin a grand tour in London. According to the lie, Jack had generously offered to accompany her to London so she might stay with her aunt for a few days. Erin joked the best part about time-travel was that it allowed the freedom to create past experiences and relatives as needed.
Jack spent every afternoon with her. They talked only about safe subjects when they spoke at all—the weather, his shipping trade, what a season in London was like. Most of the time, however, they played cards. Hayley taught him how to play rummy and the two became fierce competitors. He allowed Hayley her silence, understanding her mind needed as much time to heal as her body.
The event with his uncle brought the horrible memories of her father back to the foreground. The night with its silence and darkness caused her nightmares to return. Jack slept in the chair by her bed, while the terror that waited in her subconscious came to claim her. Often, she didn’t wake during her bad dreams even as he stroked her hair and spoke quiet, soft words in an attempt to calm her. As a result, Jack napped each morning when Erin arrived, so he would be able to stay awake to see Hayley through the night.
“I can play my ace there, discard the seven, and I’m out.” She laughed as she beat him at cards yet again. “That gives me five hundred. I win. You need to wake up, hotshot, or I’ll be forced to find someone who can give me a little competition.”
He was pleased to see that with each passing day his feisty Hayley reemerged a little more. “Is that right?” he asked. “And did it not occur to you that perhaps I’m letting you win to make you feel better?”
“Ha!” she yelled. “You, sir, are a poor sport, trying to blame my injuries on your bad playing.” She giggled and Jack felt as though he’d been given the moon on a silver platter. Her laughter, absent until that moment, soothed his soul like rain on parched land. Pleased to see her smiling, he leaned forward and kissed her gently on the lips. It was a short, sweet kiss, but it caught them both unaware.
“Hayley—” He was about to apologize for his impetuous action, but she spoke first.
“It’s about time.”
“What?”
“I’ve been wondering if you would ever do that again,” she answered softly. “You’ve been so patient, so kind and understanding these last few days.”
“So?” He was confused by her comment.
“It’s just so unlike you.” A mischievous grin crossed her lips.
“Unlike me?” Jack rose and placed his hands on his hips. “In other words, I’m usually impatient and rude?”
Her giggle turned to full-blown laughter. “Hey, those are your words, not mine.”
“You ungrateful wench.” He feigned anger when what he really felt was overwhelming joy. “I’ve given you my bed, waited on you hand and foot, let you win at cards—”
“You did not let me win.” She yelled back, her grin taking over her entire face.
“I did let you win,” he taunted, coming around the table. Hayley rose from her seat, ducked under his arm and jumped onto the bed. He stalked to her side, thrilled by her playfulness as she lobbed a
pillow at his head.
“I can see I’ve spoiled you.” He continued coming toward her, dodging her repeated blows with the feather pillow, her delighted laughter filling the room. “It’s time to remove the kid gloves.” With his words, he grabbed the pillow out of her grasp, pulled her down on the bed, straddled her hips and proceeded to tickle her senseless.
“Stop, stop,” she gasped between tortured laughter. “I mean it,” she said when he showed no sign of ceasing his torment. “I’ll pee my pants.”
Shocked by her words and afraid she was serious, he stopped tickling her, shaking his head. “What you won’t say.”
“I can’t help it. Tickles always make me have to go to the bathroom,” she replied, mock seriousness in her voice.
“Well, that’s useful information to have, I suppose. For future reference.” They both laughed. The tension of the past few days forgotten.
“Ah, firebrand.” Jack leaned over her. “It’s good to have you back.” He kissed her forehead, then placed both hands on her cheeks and kissed her lips. She caressed his face as they remained locked together, giving each other everything, holding back nothing. His hands engulfed her as he stroked her hair. The kiss was a release of the tension that had been building up between them.
“Hayley,” he whispered as his kisses trailed over her cheek, around her earlobe, and down her neck. Something wet trickled down his cheek. She opened her eyes and saw the tear sliding down his tanned skin before he could dash it away. Hell, he never cried. Not once in his whole, damned miserable life.
Surprised, she pulled back.
He released his hold on her and slowly sat with his back to her. She reached over to place her hand on his shoulder. “Jack?”
He rested his head in his hands for several moments. When he felt able to speak, his voice shook. “I’m so sorry, Hayley. When I think of what he was going to do to you—” He stopped and took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. “Seeing you tied to that bed with that monster standing over you. My God, I was almost too late. He could have killed you.” He stopped speaking, his hands still supporting his head.
“It’s okay,” she said softly. “You were in time. It’s over.”
Taking her face in his hands, he pressed his brow to hers. “I’m sorry. I’m tired as hell. I’ve been so worried about you.”
“You haven’t been getting much sleep in that chair,” she answered softly. “I know you’ve been staying with me. Thank you.”
“My pleasure.” A small smile crossed his lips. Noticing the dark circles under her eyes, he laid back on the pillows, tucking her in the crook of his shoulder.
“It looks like we both need to get some rest. Try to sleep.” He pressed a light kiss in her hair. “We’ll talk in the morning.”
She started to protest, but he stopped her by placing his fingertips on her lips. “We’re both tired. There’s plenty of time to say what needs to be said. Later.”
Unsure of his feelings, of what more to say, he kissed her lightly once more. Hayley nodded, her eyes already closing. Her exertions during the pillow fight had drained her low reserves of energy.
“Don’t leave me.” She clung tightly to him as she drifted into sleep.
Jack watched her as she slept, knowing rest would not come as easily for him. He’d never shared his emotions with another person. Hayley, however, with all her spice and energy, broke down his barriers. She’d challenged him from the first night he met her.
Smiling, he remembered the black eye she’d given him after he accused her of being a smuggler. Even then, he’d felt drawn to her, like a moth to a flame. He’d let her into his heart. Jack Campbell had met his match, not in some soft, quiet, accommodating woman, but in a feisty, argumentative, tough redhead.
She was his kindred spirit, his other half, his heart and soul. Watching her struggle with her fears made him realize how many of his own he had faced. He had avenged Helena’s death and Julia’s abuse at the hands of his uncle. He’d removed a truly evil person from the world and he should be feeling jubilant. He’d brought Wilshire to justice, but at what cost to himself or Hayley?
He loved her as he’d never loved anyone. He wanted her with him forever. Now he had to convince her to stay in the nineteenth century and to trust him with her battered heart. Fighting his uncle was easier than battling Hayley’s pride and mistrust of men.
A soft sigh escaped her lips and she nestled closer. Running his fingers lightly through her hair, he kissed her forehead. A slight smile crossed her face in sleep. He grinned back, taking it as a sign. “We’ll make it through this.”
Chapter 28
When Hayley opened her eyes, the room was bright with sunlight. Damn. It was early afternoon. She was amazed she had slept through most of another day. She’d never slept this much in her life. The sun was making its slow trek across the sky.
Hayley felt lighter and happier than she had in weeks. No. She wasn’t sure she’d ever felt this happy. Glancing beside her, she realized why. She was still nestled in the crook of Jack’s arm. Raising her head, she watched him as he slept. He hadn’t left her. He’d stayed as she’d requested.
She smiled as she watched his face, peaceful at rest. His breaths were long and deep, relaxed. Her thoughts returned to the night of the attack and everything the earl had done to her. She remembered Jack crashing into the room, just when she had given up hope. He’d saved her life. Regardless of his comments about her strength, the only thing that pulled her through the harrowing experience was her faith in him, her never-ending belief that he would come.
She relied on him. She trusted him with her life and her heart. Looking at his face, peaceful at rest, she realized she had finally relinquished the last part of her she’d always been so careful to keep to herself—her heart.
“Oh my God,” she whispered, barely making a sound. “I love him.”
Slowly, his eyes opened as he chuckled lightly. “I can think of worse things.” He gathered her closely to him.
“You’re awake.” Hayley said accusingly, pulling away from his grasp.
“I never said I wasn’t. Now what’s this about you loving me?” He gave her an arrogant, but charming smile.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. You must have been dreaming.” She sat up and clasped the blanket around her. “Besides, isn’t it against nineteenth century policy for you to be lying in bed with a woman with no clothes on?”
Jack grinned at the challenging tone of her voice. “Alas, we have clothes on, but generally speaking, yes. It would be frowned upon for the two of us to be in bed together like this. In fact, your family—were they here—would expect me to do the honorable thing,” Jack sat up and took her hand in his. His face was no longer laughing, but serious. Gently, his thumb circled her wrist.
“Honorable thing?”
“Marriage, Miss Garland. When a man goes to bed with an innocent young lady, society dictates he should take her as his wife in order to preserve her reputation.” He spoke lightly, but his words served a double purpose. He was not simply educating her about the times. The way he was holding her hand and looking at her made it seem as if he were actually proposing.
“Well, that’s just silly.” She gave a little laugh she hoped sounded genuine. “I mean, we didn’t have sex or anything. And as you said, we’re not really naked and no one knows we slept together. Well, except for your servants, but they wouldn’t tell anyone, would they? Besides, as luck would have it, I don’t have any family in this century and if Marian were here, she would be trying to get you in her bed, not force you into marriage with me.”
Suddenly, Jack laughed. A deep, long laugh that had Hayley stiffening her spine. “What’s so funny?”
“You,” he replied between chuckles. “You’re rambling. Still worried about the prospect of marrying me? You might actually enjoy it, you know.”
Concern quickly replaced his smile as she attempted to rise, panic-stricken. She winced, stiff after so many days
in bed.
“Stop,” he said gruffly. “Get back in bed. You’re not well enough yet.”
She ceased her retreat, swaying slightly by the side of the mattress. However, she didn’t attempt to return.
“I said, get back in bed.” His voice was tinged with anger. “I’ll drag you back if you don’t move—now! Look at you. You can barely stand.”
“I’m fine. Just stiff,” she said. “It’s my own fault for acting like such a weakling these last few days. What I need is to go running.” Despite her words, she turned as she spoke and sat down. Jack’s strong hands pulled her down, then covered her with a blanket. Sighing, she kept her eyes lowered, too afraid to continue on the path their conversation had taken. She’d been a fool to say she loved him aloud.
Shaking his head, Jack got out of bed and strolled over to the window. “My brave Hayley, I’ve made an astounding discovery.”
Bewildered, she looked at him as he stood with his back to her. “What’s that?”
“You battle everyone’s demons for them. You would risk your life everyday for a scared child or a battered wife. You stand up to bullies who threaten bodily harm to a woman who is too weak or powerless to defend herself. You aren’t afraid to fight with your fists or your words and amazingly enough, you are a coward.”
“A coward?” She began to rise again.
A powerful hand pushed her back as she realized Jack had returned to the bed. He bent over her, arms braced on either side of her head, boxing her in. He leaned down so closely she could feel his warm breath on her face.
“A coward,” he repeated. “You battle everyone’s demons, but your own. Those you allow to defeat you. You’ll only fight with words and fists, never emotions, never feelings, never with your heart. I watched you defend yourself against one of the most evil and dangerous men I’ve ever known and barely blink an eye, but right now, your fear is so tangible I can almost touch it. You’re afraid. Afraid of me and of what you feel for me. Admit it,” he said. “Admit it.”