by Lisa Olsen
“But who’s going to catch me if I don’t make the jump?” I muttered, looking down over the railing to the pews below, which seemed awfully far away. Despite my gloomy mood, I didn’t have a death wish, and plummeting onto a room packed with wooden furniture wasn’t my idea of a good time.
“I know you can make it, come on.” Bishop nodded supportively, and he had made it look fairly easy leaping up there. Deciding to trust him, I kicked off my heels and climbed up on the railing, clutching the wall until I found my balance.
“Yep, just jump up there, easy peasey,” I muttered to myself, flexing my legs a couple of times to warm them up. As it was, I overshot the jump, and I would’ve sailed right over the rafter if he hadn’t been there to catch me.
“See, I knew you could do it,” he grinned, but I didn’t share his light frame of mind.
“Okay, I’m here. What did you want to show me?”
“It’s not here, it’s up there.” He pointed to where the thick beams arched up to cross in the center, the highest point in the church apart from going up on the roof. Without waiting for me he padded lightly to the apex of the rafters with perfect balance.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I murmured, more nervous now that I was on my own at such a height. I followed at a much slower pace, taking each step carefully, half afraid someone would notice us up there at any moment and scream, making me lose my balance. At least if I survived unharmed after falling from such a height, I could blame it on a miracle.
“Yep, we’re super high,” I breathed once I reached his side. The beams were thick enough to stand at ease, but there was nothing easy about being up so far above the ground. “Now what?”
“Now you lie down.”
“This is kind of kinky, don’t you think?” I gave him a sidelong stare, and he rolled his eyes in exasperation.
“I’m not trying to do you in the rafters of the church, Anja. Just lie back and relax. Like this.” He lay with his head near the top, looking up at the gilt ceiling.
“Lie back and relax,” I frowned, lowering myself to mimic his pose. It was less scary once I was flat on my back and didn’t feel like a breeze might knock me over at any second, and being so close to the ceiling was somehow comforting. Cool beans.
“Great, now stay put. I’ll be right back.”
So much for my new found calm. “Wait! Where are you going?”
“It’s okay, I said I’ll be right back.” With that, he jumped back down to the balcony, landing light as a cat. I watched him go back the way we’d come up, but didn’t try to see where he came out, feeling woozy as soon as I looked to the ground level. Instead, I studied the ceiling while I waited, wondering what the heck I was supposed to be waiting for.
I jumped when he landed at the base of the rafter, quickly scrambling past me to lie back in his original position on the opposite beam. “Close your eyes,” he demanded.
Boy, he sure was being bossy tonight. “I thought you wanted me to see something?”
“I do. Close your eyes.”
Obediently, I closed them, waiting for whatever epiphany was supposed to strike. Below I heard more people milling about, speaking in hushed tones. I could focus my hearing and listen to their conversations if I wanted to, but it seemed wrong.
And then I heard the first strains of the organ playing below. Had Bishop brought me there to listen to church music? The singing started, the sopranos high and clear, O Come, O Come, Emmanuel. Pretty, especially the way it echoed in the rafters around us. And then the other three parts joined in, and the music amplified, rising all around me. It was so beautifully balanced, my skin broke out in goose bumps. I found my effulgence, the light inside me kindling to the splendor of the music around me. And not just light but colors, as the four parts blended in flawless harmony, they brought a wash of color into my cold, gray life.
Carried away by the rising sound, I wept from the simple perfection of voices lifted in song, a reminder of the beauty in the darkness. Once I started, the floodgates were opened, and I cried for all the senseless pain and heartbreak of losing Gunnar and Lee. Bishop reached for my hand, and held it, offering his quiet strength as the song rose to the final crescendo and then died away. We laid there for the rest of the service, the words below mostly a blur as I kept to my own thoughts, but every time the music swelled up to fill the church, I found that sense of peace and renewal again.
By the time the organ announced the end of the service, I felt drained, but better, cleansed of the weight of my emotions.
Bishop rolled to his belly and scooted up, his head hovering over mine. “Better?”
“Yes, thank you,” I smiled up at him.
“Any time.”
“Do you do this often?”
“Not as much as I should. It’s too easy to forget the little things that make life worth living. I have you to thank for that, you know. For reminding me there’s more to life than duty and responsibility.”
“I’m glad you shared it with me.”
He leaned down to brush his lips against mine, and I opened to him, eager to try the upside down Spiderman kiss, but it proved more awkward than anything else, and I ended up giggling when his beard kept tickling my nose. “I guess that’s why Spiderman doesn’t wear a beard,” I laughed, wrinkling my nose.
“That’s one bit of movie magic we’ll have to leave alone,” he smiled, laying a chaste kiss to my forehead. “Are you ready to go home now?”
“Yes.”
It was easier to get down than it was to get up, and we snuck out of the church right as the priest was making the final rounds to lock the building.
There was a much more comfortable ride in the car as we drove home with the radio blasting Vivaldi. It wasn’t all that late, and Carter was nowhere to be found when we got there. The house felt big and empty, Maggie and Tucker already packed and gone with Gunnar’s urn.
There was work to be done, but for once, I didn’t let that sense of responsibility guide me. Instead, I threaded my fingers through his, pulling him close. “Will you stay with me?”
“Of course.”
“I know we didn’t really talk about this, you sleeping over so much, or…”
“I’ll be here for as long as you need me,” he promised, and I tilted my head to one side.
“What if I’ll always need you?”
“Then this is where I’ll be.”
I wanted to believe that in the worst way. I wanted to know that there was one constant in my life I could utterly count on, but I was afraid to trust him completely. My head said to do the smart thing and keep up a protective barrier, but my heart stood on the ledge looking out into the abyss of the unknown, ready to leap again.
“I know it’s bad out there, our friends are dying, my family’s gone, and we don’t know who’s doing any of it – but is this our time, you and me? Did we get to forever?”
Bishop reached up with his free hand to trace the line of my jaw, his thumb brushing over my lower lip. “Anja, I got to wanting forever with you months ago. I’ll take it whenever you’re ready.”
And just like that, my heart took the leap of faith. “Then kiss me and tell me that everything will be alright.”
His lips closed over mine and I lost myself in a rush of heat as he told me without words that he’d never fail me again. Awash in a sea of emotions, I drowned in the urgent pressure of his lips, the stroke of his tongue against mine, the rasp of his beard, his familiar scent – my heart swelling with love until it felt like it might burst. Yes, there was danger ahead for both of us, but I’d never felt so blessed. Because whatever I’d lost, and whatever lay ahead, we had this time now, together, and it was enough.
Sweeping me up in his arms, Bishop carried me down to my bedroom, his lips never leaving mine. He reminded me then of everything beautiful worth sharing between two people. Every kiss, every caress, every gasp and shout of pleasure, was a celebration of love. We worshipped each other again and again, until we collapsed in
a tangle of limbs, deeply satisfied in a way that raw sex (no matter how good) couldn’t provide.
“Everything will be alright,” he promised, his forehead pressed to mine as the night faded into day.
And I believed him.
Chapter Thirty-Four
There were distinct disadvantages to sleeping in later than your man, and for the first time, I understood why it’d bugged Rob so much that he couldn’t rise as early as I could. Bishop wasn’t there when I woke, but there was a note on the pillow beside me that read:
Gone hunting. Yes, I’ll be careful. Be back soon.
Bishop
At some point we were going to have to talk about feeding and whether the old rules were still in effect – no hotties. I still tried to find a decent balance between bagged blood and fresh, though I’d been leaning more toward bagged since Carter had come to live with us, knowing his aversion to feeding live. I’d have to eat again in another day or so, but for the moment, I settled for a cup of hot cocoa laced with cinnamon as I sat down in the study to tackle my desk.
The house was eerily quiet with everyone gone. I had no idea if Carter was even home, but I disliked entering his space in case he was still asleep. With Maggie gone, I was up to my eyeballs in correspondence, and started off with a request to Felix to find me a temporary replacement or help pick up some of the slack himself. He pledged to take care of it, and I have to say, he’d been very kind in offering to see to some of the day to day stuff since Lee and Gunnar’s deaths.
I turned the ringer off on the house phone, not wanting to be disturbed or I’d never get to my own stuff to see what I could delegate to Felix. That didn’t stop the chime of the computer as I received a Skype call. But before I could decline, I saw it was from Aubrey, and I eagerly hit the green button instead.
“Hullo, sweets. Sorry I missed your call, I’ve been up to my eyeballs in… Never mind that, luv. How are you?”
“I’m fine, doing about as well as can be expected. You’ve heard about what happened here?”
“I have, yes. And I hope you know you have my heartfelt condolences for your loss.” He sounded sincere, but I doubt he could’ve named either Lee or Gunnar if hard pressed.
“Thanks, Aubrey. So, um… how are things there? Busy it sounds like. Carys has got you hoppin’, huh?”
“No rest for the wicked,” he said with a purse of the lips.
I wasn’t sure how to steer the conversation to Carys’ behavior without coming right out and asking about it. I took the roundabout way instead. “I have to admit, I’ve been a little out of the loop. How’s she doing at the whole Elder gig? I haven’t gotten any more invitations to parties, though I imagine I’m not at the top of her guest list.”
“She wasn’t even here for the New Year’s bash she requested,” he snorted. “All that bloody work for nothing. Do you know how hard it is to get a thousand orchids in the middle of winter?”
“Wait, she wasn’t there for New Year’s Eve?” Jackpot. “Where did she go?”
“Beats the stuffing out of me. One moment it was – I must have the party of the season,” he said in a high falsetto voice. “And the next thing I know, she lit out of here before the day. No matter, we had a nasty little soiree without her,” he smirked.
The wheels were turning, wondering if she could’ve had anything to do with the tainted blood fiasco. That seemed like it could be up her alley, trying to embarrass me at my own party. But it was kind of a big jump from humiliation to cold blooded murder. “How long was she gone for?”
“She came back a day or two after the party, and I thought she’d have some new boy toy to show for it. But in all honesty, she was only back for about a half a minute and then she disappeared again without so much as a by your leave. If I wasn’t tickled pink to see her gone, I would’ve been insulted. Why, she didn’t crash your party, did she?”
“That’s what I’m trying to find out,” I murmured, lost in thought.
“I highly doubt it if she didn’t show herself. Carys isn’t one to watch from the sidelines, she has to be the center of attention.”
He had a point. “That’s true. I guess enjoy your reprieve while you can. Maybe she did find some new guy to torture and she’ll be gone for a while?”
“From your lips,” he grinned. “Any chance you’d like to take advantage of her absence and come for a visit?”
“Uh, no, thank you. I’d better stick close to home until I figure out a few things around here.”
“Wait one moment,” he frowned, his brows twitching closer together. “You don’t think Carys had anything to do with that business with your bodyguards, do you?”
“I didn’t. But her absence sort of casts a different light on things, don’t you think?”
“Never happen.” He shook his head with absolute sincerity. “The old girl might hate you, but she’d never think to take it out on your servants.”
“You don’t think she’d hurt me by hurting the ones I love?”
“She might, but not your staff.”
“They were more to me than staff, Aubrey.”
“Yes, but she wouldn’t be able to fathom that. Servants are lower than humans in her eyes.”
Still, it all sounded like too much of a coincidence to me, and definitely worth following up on. “Thanks, Aubrey. You’ve given me a lot to think about.”
“If you do see Carys, tell her I’ve got things well in hand here, no rush for her to return.”
“Yep, I’ll be sure to pass that along,” I replied with a thin smile. “Bye.”
Bishop wasn’t going to like this, not one bit. But I knew there was one person I could count on to explore the possibility that it was Carys behind it all. At the door to the attic, I stopped to cock my head, listening closely for any sign that Carter might be awake yet. Sure enough, I heard him up and around, his movements regular, punctuated by the occasional groan or long exhale.
If it was anybody else, I might assume he was indulging in a little private time, but I knew Carter’s usual routine. Throwing open the door with a loud bang to give him plenty of time to adjust to the fact that I was coming, in case I was wrong about his activity, I took the stairs at a leisurely pace. Just as I thought, he lay on one of the exercise mats, doing crunches.
“Hey, Carter. Sorry to disturb your workout,” I called out as I reached the top of the stairs.
“You’re fine, as long as you don’t mind if I multi-task.”
“Nope you go on ahead, as long as you don’t expect me to join in.”
“Gonna go soft on me, sunshine?” he grinned. “Do I need to put you back on a regimen?”
Back in our hunting days he’d nagged me daily about my workout routine, and I felt just as unenthusiastic about it now as I had then. “Girls are supposed to be soft and curvy. Besides, it’s not like I can bulk up. My body pretty much stays as it is whether I work out or not. Why bother?”
“I do it because it keeps my reflexes sharp, that’s important in my line of work. At least, it used to be,” he frowned, sitting up for a second before he switched to push-ups. “If you didn’t want to spar, what did you come up for?”
“Can’t I just want to chat with my best bud?” He fixed me with a stare on his way up, but didn’t reply before the next rep, so I decided to lay it all out on the table. “Listen, I had a chat with Aubrey, and I think you might be on to something about Carys being behind this.”
That got his attention, and he stopped exercising, popping up into a crouch. “Oh? Don’t tell me he uncovered a plot against you. Or did she try to use him against you and he warned you because he’s hoping you’ll be grateful? Or was he hoping Bishop might be taken out in the crossfire?”
“Nothing so definite, but he did say that she left Vetis before New Year’s and after a brief return, she left abruptly again. That seems like quite a coincidence, wouldn’t you say?”
“Oh that. I already knew that part,” he frowned, disappointed.
“You did?”
I blinked.
“Yep, I’m one step ahead of you. I’ve got her tracked on a flight to New York on December thirtieth, but that’s as far as I’ve gotten.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
Carter gave an embarrassed cough. “You were, um… busy when I got in last night.”
“Oh.” I looked away, my cheeks burning. Time to stick to the subject. “Then she’s definitely in the country?”
Carter grabbed a metal rod mounted between two of the beams overhead and started his pull-ups. “Yep.”
“It’s not a lot to go on, but it’s a start. Do you think you can find out what happened to her after New York?”
“Definitely. Can I do it without taking a trip to the Big Apple? That’s more iffy.”
“Well, let me know if you find anything. I do have that townhouse in New York if you need to take a trip. Or maybe we should all go? There’s strength in numbers.”
“What about Bishop? Are you sure he’s gonna want to hunt down his ex?”
“Let me worry about Bishop, you see what you can do to track her down. If we can prove she’s made it to the west coast, then maybe it’ll be easier for him to swallow.”
Carter jumped down to the mat. “I’ll stay on it.”
“Thanks.”
I sailed down the stairs, closing the door behind me to give him some privacy to change out of his sweaty clothes before he got going.
“Is there something I should know about?” Bishop’s voice at my back scared the bejeezus out of me, and I choked on my own spit as I wheeled around.
“Oh God, you scared me,” I sputtered, not at all relieved when I saw the look on his face.
“You honestly think Carys is behind this?”
“I guess you overheard, huh?” So much for gathering more evidence before I brought it up to him again. “I don’t know, maybe. Don’t you think it’s weird that she just happens to be in the country when things start falling apart?”
“The opposite side of the country, not here.”