by Lisa Olsen
Chapter Thirty-Nine
“Are you sure about this?” I asked, sitting on the edge of the bed as Carter zipped the ginormous duffel full of weapons closed. The thing was twice as big as his bag of clothes, of course.
He still wouldn’t look at me, and that bothered me more than I liked. “I can’t stay here. Especially if you’re not gonna be around.”
“I know, but I’ll be back. Just because I’m stepping down as Elder doesn’t mean I don’t want to live here eventually. We’re just taking an extended vacation.” I still had no idea how long we’d be gone, and that was the beauty of it. No strings, no responsibilities. Bishop and I were ready to make a clean break without so many demands on our time for once. The council wouldn’t be too happy about it, but I was absolutely sure this was the best decision I could make.
That didn’t slow him from packing. “I can’t sit around waiting for you. I have to have a purpose of my own. I’m more than your sidekick.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. Of course you’re not my sidekick,” I frowned, worried that there was something more behind his sudden departure. “I didn’t expect you to put your life on hold, but… I thought you’d made a home here. Maggie and Tucker will be back soon, and Hanna and Mason.”
“I told you before, I’m not that guy. I need to keep moving.” The last zipper made it sound so final. He lifted his blue eyes to mine, pleading with me to understand. “It doesn’t mean you’re not the closest thing I’ve had to family since I got all fangy, and that’s not nothing to me, sunshine. But I need to feel like I’m making a difference.”
“You do.” Didn’t he know that? How long would the burning need for penance keep him from settling down and building a life for himself? “You know you’ve saved a ton more lives than you ever took by now.”
“That’s not the point. The point is, there are too many people out there still taking them, and I can’t stay here when I can do something about it.”
“I understand,” I nodded. It probably wouldn’t take much convincing for me to join him in the hunt again if I didn’t have Bishop in my life. But I’d fought hard for my shot at happiness, and I wasn’t about to give it up. “You always did have that Batman thing going on, no matter how hard I tried to steer you to the Marvel side,” I smiled, walking to the edge of the staircase when he hefted his bags.”
“Call it Deadpool then,” he grinned back. “I always did like the mouth on that guy.”
“Yeah, I can see that about you.” We stood there, neither one of us moving. I knew I was stalling, but I couldn’t help it. “What are you going to do then? Go back to hunting on your own?”
Carter shrugged. “It’s what I do. Not that you’ve made it easy on me. Why couldn’t you have removed your compulsion on me before Jakob took it away? Who ever heard of a vampire hunter who can’t actually kill vampires? How the hell am I supposed to survive if I can’t defend myself?”
“You can defend yourself, you just can’t kill anyone. Not on purpose anyway,” I added, and immediately regretted saying it as a light came into his eyes. I could tell he wouldn’t be squeamish about experimenting with how far he could push the constraints of my compulsion. “Besides, you weren’t in any shape for me to remove the compulsion anyway, you were dead to the world at the time.”
“Fine, but what if I feel like some fish and chips? I can’t go to England ever again? What kind of a life is that?”
I smiled, refraining from pointing out that he didn’t eat either of those things any more, but I appreciated his effort to lighten the mood. “Maybe you’ll have to expand your horizons a bit and find a new favorite. I hear shawarma is pretty tasty.”
Carter snorted, but didn’t say more as he marched forward, and I was forced to go down the stairs or move out of the way. I chose to lead the way. We didn’t speak again until we reached the foyer, and it struck me how empty the house was now. No Maggie, no Tucker, no Gunnar, no Lee. No Rob, no Marcus, no Ellie, no Isak. Maybe it was for the best if we all left the place. Maybe it was cursed.
“What about the hole in my foundation?” I remembered suddenly.
“I told you, it’s only the subfloor.”
“It’s still a muddy hole, Carter. Can’t you at least stick around until you finish your tunnel?”
“What for? You figured out how to escape without it,” he grinned. “You can go ahead and fill it in, you won’t hurt my feelings.”
I wasn’t sure if that meant he didn’t plan to come back or not, but I decided not to push the issue any further. Me harping about it wouldn’t make him return any quicker.
“Where will you go?” I asked as we reached the front door, and he shook his head.
“I don’t know. Up north maybe. Portland or Seattle. Maybe I’ll make my way East eventually.”
“Don’t stay away too long then. And don’t be afraid to pick up the phone every now and again.”
“Sure, Ma. And I’ll remember to change my socks and pick up my room too,” he cracked. “Can I go now?”
I laughed because he wanted me to, even though the idea that I wouldn’t see him every day anymore tore me up inside. “Fine, I’ll walk you out.”
Carter dropped his bags on the front porch and wiped his hands on his jeans, before shoving them deep into the pockets of his hoodie.
“Be safe,” I said, knowing he wouldn’t like me getting all emotional on him.
“Stay frosty, sunshine,” he replied with a tight lipped smile, looking up as Bishop appeared at the top of the stairs. “Don’t let Dumbo call the shots just ’cause you’re not the Elder anymore.”
“I’ll remember that.” I didn’t care if he wanted to keep his distance, I hugged him anyway.
Carter froze, his hands still stuffed in his pockets as if he didn’t know what to do with a hug. For just a moment, he relaxed against me, before he unstuck and pushed me away again. “Okay, okay, enough with the mushy stuff. I’ll see ya.”
“Bye.”
Bishop came down and offered his hand. “Carter.”
“Bishop,” he replied, shaking it briefly before he picked up his bags and left.
“Bye,” I called out again, but Carter didn’t turn around, he just kept on walking.
*
“Are you sure about this?” I asked Bishop, echoing my question to Carter.
Bishop stroked the small of my back in tight circles. “I am. Why, are you having any doubts?”
“No,” I replied without hesitation. “I can’t stand the thought of one more person dying because of me, not a single one. Maybe if I try being an ordinary vampire for a while, I won’t be on quite so many hit lists.”
“You’ll never be ordinary to me.”
“Aw, when did you get to be so sweet? I distinctly remember you being more of a dumbhole.”
“I’ll have to try harder to live up to my reputation then,” he replied, the corner of his mouth tugging up slightly. “You want me to push you away again for old time’s sake?”
“No good, I’ll just beat some sense into you this time. I’m not giving up without a fight ever again.”
“That’s my girl,” he approved, his smile stretching wider. “The same goes for me. I’ll follow you to the ends of the Earth if that’s what it takes.”
He said that now, but I had to wonder how long it’d be before our past responsibilities came knocking. “You don’t think you’ll miss it? You’ve been working for the Order for so long. Just because I’m quitting doesn’t mean you have to give up your job too.”
“There are parts of it I’ll miss,” he admitted with a half shrug. “But it’s only a job, and I’m finally in a place where I want more. I want to figure out what it means to be alive again. How to find the balance between art and order.” Bishop reached for my hand, his thumb stroking over the promise ring as he threaded his fingers through mine. “I want a life with you.”
I wanted those things too, more than anything. We’d earned our shot at a new life together.
“Here we go,” I breathed, a flutter of nerves attacking with sudden force so that I stood stock still until the queasiness passed. Even though I knew there was nothing the council could do to stop me, I still wasn’t looking forward to the actual business of quitting. But they deserved more than a Dear John letter after all of their support.
“Kiss me and tell me everything’s going to be okay,” I whispered, and Bishop dutifully brushed his lips over mine.
“It’ll be better than okay. I think we’re ready, don’t you?”
“Ready for what?”
“Forever.”
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Read on for a special preview of Lisa Olsen’s novel, Angel of Mercy, available now!
Books by Lisa Olsen:
The Touch
Nine Steps to Sara
Moonsong
Untitled Moonsong Sequel (announced)
Pretty Witches All in a Row
Kiss the Witch Goodbye
The Company Series:
The Company of Shadows
The Company of Darkness
The Company of Lies
The Company of Death
The Fallen Series:
Angel of Mercy
Mercy for the Wicked
Mercy for the Damned
Child of Mercy
Mercy for the Fallen
Forged Bloodlines Series:
Wake Me When the Sun Goes Down
Meet Me When the Sun Goes Down
Find Me When the Sun Goes Down
Miss Me When the Sun Goes Down
Follow Me When the Sun Goes Down
Hear Me When the Sun Goes Down
Release Me When the Sun Goes Down
Trust Me When the Sun Goes Down
Tempt Me When the Sun Goes Down
Kiss Me When the Sun Goes Down
Carter (announced)
Forged Bloodlines Book 11 (announced)
For more information, visit the author’s website at http://www.lisaolsen.net
You can also visit her on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/lisaolsenrobotbrain
Preview – Angel of Mercy
Have you ever been in so much pain it ceases to have any meaning? So much pain you can’t move, can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t even scream? Cast adrift on an ocean of pain, my body tossed and turned helplessly, buffeted by forces beyond my control. It sounds almost poetic, doesn’t it? But at the time I prayed for death, anything to ease that white hot agony.
I wish I could say there was a bright white light waiting for me at the end of a glowing tunnel. In reality, I was so focused on the misery, there could’ve been a three ring circus around me and I wouldn’t have noticed. How long I hovered there I never knew, time ceased to have all meaning.
But then something happened.
A soft golden light wrapped around my body, and a feeling of warmth and comfort descended over me. At first I thought that was finally it. I was going to die, and I’m not gonna lie, there was a measure of relief in that realization. Only instead of the pain fading away and being carried off into the great beyond it grew worse, something I hadn’t thought possible.
I was still reeling from that new torture when the pain faded and disappeared so suddenly, I could feel the echo of it for long heartbeats after it was gone. Drawing in my first unlabored breath, my eyelids fluttered open, vision blurry in the uncertain light as I tried to focus.
Dimly, my mind registered the fact that a man stood over me, his hands lightly pressed to my abdomen. Before I could open my mouth to ask who he was and why exactly he was touching me, he looked up and our eyes locked. Neither one of us spoke, though I did feel his hands pull away swiftly. The man stared down at me with an expression of surprise mingled with fascination, as though I was the most interesting thing he’d ever seen before. I have to say, he was pretty captivating as well.
His eyes were the most vivid shade of blue – the kind you only see in magazine ads for contact lenses, or on movie stars. They practically glowed in the muted light, and a golden nimbus surrounded him, flickering and crackling like a bug zapper. I swear my eyes only closed for a second, and when I opened them again, he was gone. Puzzling over whether or not any of it was real, I sank back into sweet oblivion, my sleep restful and devoid of pain.
*
The next thing I became aware of was the horrible taste in my mouth, like I’d been giving my cat, Mimsy, a tongue bath (not something I’m into by the way, blecch). Speaking of tongues, mine felt thick and clumsy, and it was difficult to swallow. Automatically, my hand shot out for the water bottle I keep on the bedside table, but it came up empty, instead smacking against something hard and metallic. I tentatively cracked an eye open, brows knitting together as it sank into my mental fog – I wasn’t in my bedroom.
In fact, I wasn’t at home at all.
“Wha…?” The trappings of a hospital room were unmistakable, even without the equipment. The automatic bed was a dead giveaway, let alone the IV sticking out of my arm. The nurse call button was nowhere in sight, nor was there any sign of activity in the darkened room. I was in the hospital, I just had no idea why or how I’d gotten there.
Automatically my mind started to go over what I did know. My name is Merceline Renault, though everybody calls me Mercy (except for my mother). I worked at a nightclub named Eden in Seattle as a bartender. Not the most glamorous job, but I liked having my days free. Plus, it was fast paced, the club played great music, and the tips were fantastic on the weekends. Satisfied that I seemed to remember my phone number, my ABC’s and the lyrics to every musical ever made, I turned my attention back to my surroundings.
“Hello?” I called out, but it made little more than a croak from my parched throat. The monitor by my side beeped softly and I squinted at the display, noting the steady climb in my pulse. 110, 119, 127, 134… That couldn’t be good.
A harried nurse came in, eyes on the equipment and completely ignoring me, frowning as she caught sight of the display.
“Hey…” My voice was stronger, but I still sounded like the crypt keeper version of my normal speaking voice.
“Sweet Jesus!” The nurse jumped, clearly not expecting me to be awake even though the monitors were going crazy. “When did you wake up?” she blinked. Her hair was the bright ginger of a natural redhead. A color I had tried and failed to duplicate over the years before deciding to accept my own deep, chestnut tresses. She looked even paler than me, which was hard to do. My devotion to sunscreen was legendary, even in the overcast Seattle weather.
I jumped because she jumped, and the monitor beeped its annoyance over the corresponding rise in my pulse. My hand rose instinctively to my chest, pulling at the IV sticking out of my wrist, and the air sucked through my teeth at the sting. “Have some water?” I gave her a pleading look, unable to phrase the request any more eloquently with the burning in my throat.
“Oh… yes, I’ll be right back.” Right back turned out to be a relative term as it was easily a few minutes before she returned, a small plastic cup of ice chips in hand. “I can give you one teaspoon of ice chips right now, but you’ll have to wait for the doctor before anything else.”
I savored the cooling relief as the ice rapidly melted, swallowing easier. “Thank you,” I smiled, grateful to hear my voice sound a little stronger, more like myself.
“You’re welcome.” The nurse smiled back, picking up her touchpad, fingers flying over the surface to enter my vital statistics. “I’m sorry if I scared you before. We weren’t expecting you to wake up for quite some time.”
“S’okay.” I waved off her concern. “I wasn’t expecting to wake up here at all,” I admitted.
“I’ve put in a request to let Dr. Michaelson know you’re awake though, and she should be in fairly soon to check up on you. In the meantime, how are you feeling? Any dizziness or nausea?”
She said that like I was supposed to know who Dr. Michaelson was, but I decided to nod and smile, not wanting to admit that bit of ignorance. Instead, I gave a longing look toward the plastic cup of ice chips.
“Um, no, not dizziness exactly, just a little out of it I guess.” A bit of an understatement – I felt like I’d been woken up after a double shift at the club with only a few hours of sleep.
“Good, that’s good.” The nurse nodded absently, setting down the pad to take my blood pressure next. “Try to be still and breathe regularly.”
Did I look like I’d been about to jump up and do the Macarena? Lying there obediently, I noticed a pale, dusky rose aura surrounding her, standing out in the dim lighting. At least, it’s what I always thought an aura would look like, I’d never seen one before. At first I chalked it up to tired eyes, but after a surreptitious rub I wasn’t so sure.
“Your blood pressure looks good, what about your pain level? How would you rate it on a scale of one to ten?” she asked.
It took me a minute to realize she’d asked a question. I was too distracted by the pretty color, trying to see if it looked any different if I closed one eye or the other, or if blinking had any effect. Even then it took some thought to process what she said. Should I be in pain? Shifting in the bed, I felt tired and sore, but nothing horrible. “It’s not too bad, maybe a one or two. Where am I?” It was time for some questions of my own.
The nurse nodded again and entered the data into her pad. “The ICU of Northwest Hospital,” she answered readily.
My brows climbed at the mention of the Intensive Care Unit. Just how bad off was I? “How long have I been here?”
“A few days. You were brought in on Saturday night and went into emergency surgery.” The nurse’s face grew sympathetic as if she pitied me for the gaps in my memory.