by Billi Jean
A Total-E-Bound Publication
www.total-e-bound.com
Safe in His Arms
ISBN # 978-1-78184-332-1
©Copyright Billi Jean 2013
Cover Art by Posh Gosh ©Copyright May 2013
Edited by Sue Meadows
Total-E-Bound Publishing
This is a work of fiction. All characters, places and events are from the author’s imagination and should not be confused with fact. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, events or places is purely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form, whether by printing, photocopying, scanning or otherwise without the written permission of the publisher, Total-E-Bound Publishing.
Applications should be addressed in the first instance, in writing, to Total-E-Bound Publishing. Unauthorised or restricted acts in relation to this publication may result in civil proceedings and/or criminal prosecution.
The author and illustrator have asserted their respective rights under the Copyright Designs and Patents Acts 1988 (as amended) to be identified as the author of this book and illustrator of the artwork.
Published in 2013 by Total-E-Bound Publishing, Think Tank, Ruston Way, Lincoln, LN6 7FL, United Kingdom.
Warning:
This book contains sexually explicit content which is only suitable for mature readers. This story has a heat rating of Total-e-burning and a sexometer of 2.
This story contains 239 pages, additionally there is also a free excerpt at the end of the book containing 7 pages.
Love’s Command
SAFE IN HIS ARMS
Billi Jean
Book two in the Love’s Command Series
Can a woman learn to trust her heart enough to give her dream another chance? Can a man reveal all, in order to keep his love safe in his arms?
Mandy would do almost anything for Mac, anything except give him her heart—again. She has spent five long years trying to get over him. Now, forced back into his arms, will she finally have the courage to reach for her dream? Or will she lose him before she has even got a chance to be in his arms?
Mac has never been able to shake his need for Mandy—not even after five long years without her. Now she is back but, instead of the young, sweet girl who gave him her innocence, she is a fierce, courageous woman—so sexy he can barely keep his eye on the prize—her in his arms for the rest of their lives.
Dedication
To my friends and family: Thank you for all your support!
Elizabeth: You rock!
Sue: What can I say? I’ll work on the reps… J
Nancy: You’re always my best reader!
Trademarks Acknowledgement
The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction:
Chevy Malibu: General Motors Corporation
Honda: Honda Motor Company, Limited
Zingers: Hostess Brands, Inc.
Victoria’s Secret: Limited Brands
Corona: Grupo Modelo
Dos Equis: Cuauhtémoc-Moctezuma Brewery, Heineken International
Glock: Glock Ges.m.b.H.
Black Hawk: Sikorsky Aircraft Corporation
Ziploc: S. C. Johnson & Son
Jaws: Universal Pictures
Jell-O: Kraft Foods Holdings, Inc.
M & Ms: Mars Incorporated
Jacuzzi: Jacuzzi Hot Tubs, Inc.
Wolf: Wolf Range Corporation
Rambo: Nu Image/Millenium Films
The Brady Bunch: CBS Television Distribution
The Ritz: The Ritz-Carlton Hotel Company
The Last of the Mohicans: 20th Century Fox
The Hulk: Marvel Comics
Doctor Death: DC Comics
Superman: DC Comics
Prologue
Mandy stared at the empty playground, surprised by all the changes. The big slide, its deep curve and metal slope providing hours of fun, no longer dominated the place. The swings weren’t even present. Instead a wooden structure—or maybe plastic-looking wooden structure—stood in the centre atop cedar shavings all corralled by a low yellow plastic kerb. Maybe the odd yellow plastic kept in all the wood from littering the grass, but it looked too confining as if it were stopping the play from spilling over outside its measured barrier.
Whatever, she thought with a sigh. Everything changed, most not for the better. She’d driven over nineteen hours to reach this spot. She stood there, staring out over the Texas evening and felt…void. Empty.
She walked to where the slide would have been and perched on the steps leading to a round yellow tunnel connecting one part of the design to another. All of it was plastic. Rubbing her bare palm over the plastic step, she shook her head at the absurdity of it all. Someone had probably thought that old slide would hurt a kid, maybe it even had, but without those life lessons, how could people learn how strong they were?
Kids needed to trip and fall, or how could they ever learn to get back up when life threw some real punches?
Stupid whore. Did you think a woman like you was good enough for a man like Wolf? Bitch, he’s a hero, he deserves more than some slut’s daughter.
Mandy shivered. Under her jacket and sweater, a chill brushed her flesh. Her attacker reminded her of her stepdad Sarge, but with the added dose of evil her stepdad had always been too drunk to use. He’d always used his fists, not words to hurt her. Until her brother and Mac had put a stop to him. Mac. Just thinking his name brought a fresh rush of painful tears to her eyes. She blinked them back and refused to let them past the emptiness filling her.
She stared out beyond the deserted playground and dusk lining the trees to a memory from her past. Thunderstorms flashed through her mind, and the image of Mac as a rag-tag teenage boy offering to take her nightmares away.
Only he gave you a completely new set, didn’t he?
Frowning at the thought, she hugged her arms over her chest and rocked a bit on the step. Mac hadn’t meant to hurt her. He’d been trying to comfort her after her brother’s death. Mac was a hero. Her attacker had been right about that, he was a hero. He’d also been all she’d ever wanted but could never have. He liked brunettes, tall, leggy, dark-haired women. She knew that now. She’d watched him letting one go down on him in a bar instead of coming back to her as he’d promised.
‘Fuck, this was a mistake, Mandy.’
His husky words, so full of regret, still brought a sting of shame to her cheeks. She’d pushed him, hadn’t she? Pushed for more until he’d given it to her, then made promises she didn’t give him time to fulfil.
‘I have to go, but we’ll discuss this when I get back. I promise I’ll explain it all then, okay?’
She cut off the painful memories, forcing herself to think of something else, but still her mind swirled with the feel of him, the sight and sound, and oh, God, the taste of him. She’d had him, in her arms, so warm and real, so right.
In the end, he hadn’t needed to explain anything, had he? None of that mattered now. She’d never see him again, never stare into his handsome face, never stand by and watch him while he kept her at a distance. She should have known when Rob died that Mac had simply wanted to comfort her, not start a relationship with her. Sex did not equal a relationship. She knew that. But Mac…
Yeah, but with Mac she couldn’t remember a time since she’d met him right here, in this playground, that she’d not loved him.
She stood quickly, hearing something behind her, and spun to confront two little kids, a boy and a younger girl, both staring at her with big, startled eyes. Heck, she probably was staring at them the same way.
“Sorry, you startled me.” Her muscles screamed out in protest at the qu
ick move. The bruises and torn skin burned but she sucked down the pain and tried to smile and not frighten the kids.
The girl grinned back and giggled. “We did? You sure move fast,” she said.
“You’re not from here, huh?” the boy asked, frowning up at her past his dark, thick bangs.
“No, I’m just visiting. I used to live here, though,” she offered, gesturing carefully off to the right where she’d lived with her brother Rob and Sarge. And Mac. He’d moved in after that first night. He’d even moved with them to Florida. But then he’d enlisted and left.
“Yeah?”
She nodded, forcing the memories down. There was doubt in the boy’s eyes. “Sure, not too far from here, either.”
“You’re in the Navy?” he asked.
“Nope, not me. My brother was.” She adjusted her Navy cap, pulling the blue brim a bit lower to hide the marks on her forehead. Her sunglasses hid the blackened eyes, and her scarf took care of the bruises on her neck. On the surface, she looked like hell, but inside she didn’t feel anything, just a hollow ache where her emotions used to be.
“My brother’s in the Navy, too. He’s a pilot.”
She nodded again, and dug her hands into her jacket pockets. It was unseasonably cold but neither child wore a coat. The girl had on a sweatshirt, unzipped to reveal a pink baseball shirt, and the boy had on just a long-sleeved T-shirt.
“You kids better hit the road, it’s getting cold.”
They both seemed to consider that before nodding. “Okay, but will we see you again?” the little blonde girl asked. She was cute—a bit dirty from playing but her open face was compelling.
“No, not me. I’m on my way somewhere else.” Somewhere so vastly different from what she knew, the mere reminder of where sent a shock through her. Africa.
Would it be far enough? So far, she’d not heard from her attacker again, not after the last phone call threatening to kill Mac if she didn’t leave and never come back.
The little girl’s smile faltered but she nodded, very grown-up-like. “Well, it was nice to meet you,” she said. The boy smirked at her manners, but Mandy smiled.
“It was nice to meet you, too.”
She watched them race off, the boy, who must be her brother, she thought with a pang of sadness for her own dead brother, a step ahead of her.
Taking one more look around the playground, she sighed heavily, then turned her back on it, and her past.
Three days later…
Mac floored his truck through the red light and swerved to avoid the slow-ass Chevy Malibu in front of him. His head swam, his heart raced, but neither was from breaking the sound barrier to get to Lacey’s house.
She was gone.
Mandy.
He grimaced and turned the steering wheel sharply, taking the next corner so fast he burnt rubber. Two lane shifts later and one more turn and he gunned it again on the straightaway to Lacey’s house.
If Mandy had moved out of the house, she might have just gone to stay with Lacey for a few days. Maybe she’d gone there when his mission had lasted longer than he’d said.
Then why are you racing like a dumb shit across town?
The note. One tiny little scrap of paper had him racing across town.
‘Mac, I get it now.
Truly.
I will get in touch when I can.
Mandy’
Get in touch when she can? Get it. Get what? That he’d been dying to get home from the latest mission. That he’d said some seriously stupid things to her. That he’d hurt her when he’d not meant to had driven him nearly insane with the need to see her again and explain everything. Explain that… Fuck, he couldn’t live without her?
Pull it together, Mac. She’s at Lacey’s because you left with some dumb-ass words.
He smashed the heel of his hand down on the steering wheel as soon as he saw Lacey’s house. Mandy’s little blue Honda wasn’t out front. Shit. Shit. Shit.
He pulled in, killed the engine, and contemplated the dark house. Lacey was here, no doubt. He’d heard her dad was in the hospital after another operation on his cancer, but he’d also heard all had gone well. Lacey would be here. Maybe they’d parked Mandy’s car inside the two-car garage.
“Get your shit together. Just tell Mandy you don’t regret a thing other than not making her yours years ago.”
Fuck, why had he said such stupid shit after the best night of his life? Fear. Fucking fear that he was taking too much, too soon, and she’d one day resent him for it. The cold, hard truth of that thought sent his heart back to racing speed.
He’d never forgotten the feel of Mandy. Never got over how right she’d felt in his arms. Sex with her had been like something so alien to him he’d not recognised it as sex. Sex was sweaty, pounding lust to give his body and mind a break from the stress of being a SEAL. Sex with Mandy had been so warm and tender he’d come like he’d never done before in his life. It’d been so good sinking into her body and arms that he’d made love to her all through the night. He’d never felt so right before, so safe and at peace, in his life. When she’d curled up in his arms that morning, he’d felt like his whole messed-up life had suddenly made sense.
And he’d fucked it all up because he hadn’t been brave enough to tell her he loved her.
“Shit.” He opened the truck door and got down, quietly walking up the driveway to stand on Lacey’s doorstep, simply looking down at his hands. Rough, calloused, beaten up, his hands were the hands of a trained killer, not a man that felt the kind of desperate love he felt for one tiny woman.
Could he make her happy?
He reached up and rang the doorbell.
He’d make her the happiest damn woman in the world.
It took nearly three minutes for Lacey, looking sleepy and confused, to open the door. He knew at the first look at her that she didn’t know why he was there. Dressed in a blue robe and barefoot, hair rumpled, she grimaced at him like he’d woken her from sleep.
Hell, that’s exactly what you did do, asshole.
Still, he found himself demanding, “Where’s Mandy?”
Lacey blinked and rubbed her eyes. “Wolf? What? What’s wrong? Has Mandy been hurt?”
A shot of ice seemed to fill his chest at her words. “What? Why?”
“I don’t know, why are you here asking me about Mandy? She’s not here. I’ve not seen her since…” She paused and brushed her blonde hair—almost the same colour as Mandy’s curls—from her face. “Well, she came by to say she had an offer for a job, but she didn’t say she took it.” Lacey frowned up at him and tightened her hand on her robe. “Mac, she was upset, though, at you.”
“I didn’t do a damn thing—”
Lacey snorted and waved her hand at him in dismissal. His mouth snapped shut. Her dad was the toughest Navy SEAL ever born, and Lacey could be just as much of a hard-ass, even if she was only a hundred and ten pounds soaking wet.
“Look, save it, you’ve been stringing Mandy along for years. I’m going back to bed.”
“Shit, cut me some—”
“Don’t say it. Why should I cut you some slack if she finally won’t? Look, she’ll come back if she wants to. If not, she won’t. She’s a big girl now, Wolf, so maybe you just played with her too long.”
“Wait, what? What are you talking about? Shit, I never played with her—”
“Save it. Look, my dad is sick again and I need to sleep. I have to be up there early in the morning to talk to the doctors.”
“I’m sorry, Lacey. I’m real sorry about your dad. We all are, but give me something here.”
“Mac, are you drunk?”
“What? Hell no. I just want some answers. All her stuff is gone. All of it. What did she say, exactly, Lacey. Exactly.”
Lacey stared up at him, her blue eyes darkening until he almost turned and walked away, suddenly feeling like he didn’t want to hear what Mandy had told her.
“Fine, but you’re not going to like it, especiall
y if she’s left and you can’t do anything about it.”
He grimaced but stood his ground.
“She was convinced you think she was a mistake. I think she used the words ‘pity fuck’ to describe what happened between you two.”
The ice that felt lodged around his heart rose to his throat, making it feel sliced raw. He stumbled back, saying something to Lacey, and walked to his truck. His legs felt weak, his body, built to be one of the finest killing machines in the world, barely able to keep him upright.
“Wolf? Wolf? Wait, wait.”
He heard Lacey, but he couldn’t wait. He felt the truth in Lacey’s words, the truth Mandy must have believed—that he’d used her and regretted it.
Hadn’t he said as much?
He made it to the nearest red light before he had to jerk the door of his truck open and cast up in the street until his body ached.
Mandy. Gone. He wiped his mouth off, shut the door, and focused on the road ahead of him. He’d find her. Explain things. Remind her that he always kept his promises, and he’d promised to explain what he’d said.
First, though, he needed to find her. He was a SEAL, trained to find people. How hard could it be? He took comfort in that, and shifted the truck into gear, heading off to his first stop on his way to finding Mandy.
Chapter One
Five years later…
Mac practically ran down the luxurious hotel hallway. He slowed to a fast walk when an old couple came out of their room, but each step brought him closer to where he needed to be.
Near Mandy.
He still couldn’t believe Lacey had given him Mandy’s room number. Clearly Lacey was all about everyone being happy now that she was here, in Hawaii and getting married. Him chomping at the bit to get hold of Mandy must have been the key to convincing her he wasn’t going to blow this chance. Not with Mandy this close. That or she really believed Ace could kick his ass if he hurt Mandy, but still, he was seconds from seeing Mandy again.