Ryan’s body hardened in response, and he could camp under the tenting in his sheet. It had been a wild night and one he’d remembered on more occasions than he liked to admit.
What he should’ve done was contacted her again, after he’d woken to find her gone from the hotel room they’d both agreed to finish the night in. Only he’d held back, and he still didn’t know what had prevented him from picking up the phone and calling the hospital. Hell, he could’ve gone and seen her the time he’d visited Erin and Antonia while they’d recovered from their injuries.
Now, here he was in the hospital she worked in and he hadn’t been able to see her. His movement had been limited to dragging the IV pole to the bathroom so he could relieve himself. No way was he going to piss in any bottle and have a nurse carry it to the bathroom. He was a SEAL for fuck sake.
The door opened again, and a nurse bustled through carrying a tray. Damn, still wasn’t Suzie.
“Okay Mr. Smith, let’s get this IV out of you and then you can have a little freedom.”
Freedom.
Yes. The first thing he planned to do is take a walk around and see if he could find Suzie. It was as plain as the fresh scar on his leg Suzie Waterson was avoiding him. The time for avoidance was over. They had things to discuss. Now he knew he was going to be a father, he planned to be involved as much as he could. And he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.
The sun beat down on Ryan’s face as he sat on a bench in the rose garden at the back of the hospital. It had been two hours since he’d been freed from the confines of clear plastic tubes and the metal stand he’d been attached to.
Two frustrating hours of wandering around looking for Suzie and not finding her. He supposed he could’ve asked at one of the many nurses stations he’d wandered past, but instinct screamed at him that the last thing Suzie would want was her colleagues asking her why a patient was asking after her.
Had she told anyone she was pregnant? From his calculations, and he was no Einstein when it came to babies, but he checked the calendar and worked out it was almost three months since they’d slept together. He imagined she’d start to show soon and she’d have to answer questions then.
Was she ashamed at being pregnant?
Of cours,e she could be, you doofus. She’s going to be a single mom. It maybe the twenty first century but there were still plenty of people who look down on single moms.
Okay so she may not be ashamed of her situation, but she could be worried about what people would think. Especially since it was fairly obvious she wasn’t in a long-term relationship.
Did he want a relationship with Suzie? Apart from the whole being the father of her child thing. Did he want to pursue getting to know her more?
Yes.
For too long he’d been putting off getting in touch with her. He’d talked himself out of it—for reasons he’d yet to work out. But under the sun and in the fresh air, he could admit to himself that when he’d woken alone that morning after, a sense of loss had flowed through him. He’d ignored the sensation. He’d had one night stands before. Usually they were from girls whose mission in life had been to bed a Navy SEAL. On some occasions he’d obliged them. On other’s he’d gently rebuffed them.
But with Suzie, their whole interaction had been different. They’d actually talked about things when they’d eaten dinner. It hadn’t been meaningless conversations. They’d talked about how she’d got into nursing. He hadn’t gone too deep into his career but he’d shared with her the drive he’d had ever since a Navy Veteran had visited his high school on Veteran’s Day when he’d been a freshman and talked about the military and the honor he had in representing his country.
It was after that visit that he’d gone home and told his parents he was going to enlist. His parents had cried, both proud and scared for him. Whenever he’d caught his mom looking at him, he always wondered if she was hoping he’d come out and say he’d changed his mind. He’d been one of the dorky kids in high school. The one that was always picked on. He’d been quite familiar with the inside of a toilet bowl, until he started cracking jokes.
Life had become different and he’d been able to tolerate going to classes every day. Graduation hadn’t come soon enough and he’d found his place in the military. He’d missed his high school reunions because he’d been deployed. He hadn’t made an effort to keep in touch with the guys and they hadn’t bother to look him up either.
He still hadn’t called his parents to let them know he’d been shot. Mom would pitch a fit, and Dad would have to spend three days calming her down and stopping her from jumping on a plane to come see him. If Ryan had had an extended break from any missions, he should probably see if he could get some time off and make a quick visit home to Oregon and see them. Better to tell her face to face that he’d been hurt than over the phone. At least she’d be able to see for herself that he was okay. It would also give him the opportunity to share the news they were about to become grandparents.
“Hey, Joker, you’re a hard man to find.”
Ryan looked and saw Cowboy and Red striding toward him. He sat up straighter. “Hey, thought you guys must’ve been wheels up, since no one came and saw me.”
Really, I sound like a whiny ass girl whose best friend hasn’t called her for three days. I’m a fucking SEAL.
“Yeah, we were for a couple days. Got back this morning,” Red said as he sat down next him. “Why you hangin’ out in a garden?”
Ryan itched to ask the guys where they’d been, but he also didn’t want to know. He didn’t want to think that he could be easily replaced. “Gained my freedom from the IV. You guys here to spring me?”
“Nah, we like the guy who joined us on the recent mission more.” Cowboy winked and punched him lightly on the arm. Ryan flinched, not from Cowboy’s punch, it wouldn’t hurt a flea, but from the confirmation that he could be easily replaced. He’d worked too damn hard to let a bullet wound get him down.
“Yeah, well don’t fall in love with him, Cowboy, I’ll be back before you know it. And don’t forget, I’ve been on the team longer than either one of you. If anyone’s getting replaced it will be one of you two.”
“When do you think you’ll be back?” Red asked.
That was the million-dollar question, and he had no fucking idea. His leg had hurt like a bitch when he’d been searching for Suzie, another reason why he was sitting on the bench. It amazed him how much conditioning he’d lost in just a couple of weeks of not doing his regular morning PT workouts with the guys.
If his doctor suggested he needed to do any type of physical therapy he’d tell him where he could stick it. In the military, their morning workouts were all the therapy he needed to get himself back on his feet.
“I’m hoping to get out of here in the next day or two and then be back on base the day after.”
“You sure that’s a good idea?” Cowboy asked. “You had surgery and now an infection. You should make sure you recover properly.”
“I’ll recover more quickly if I’m back into my regular routine.”
“Well, you should listen to the doc—”
“Shut the fuck up, Cowboy,” Ryan interjected.
The other man held his arms up in surrender. “Fine, don’t be bitching to me when you can’t get over a wall. I won’t help your sorry ass.”
Ryan scrubbed a hand down his face. Shit, now they really were sounding like a group of teenage girls. He shouldn’t let his insecurities color his interaction with his team. He wasn’t the first guy to get hurt and have to take some time to recover, he won’t be the last. “Sorry, I’m just fucking annoyed at being stuck here while you guys are off doing good stuff.”
Red chuckled. “Trust me, you’re not missing much. This last mission was an escort-the-senators-daughter-to-college gig. Nothing to get too excited about.”
“Why the fuck did you guys get that deal?” Ryan asked, kind of glad he had been laid up in hospital.
“Dumb ass luck, I guess,�
�� Cowboy responded. “She wasn’t even that good looking.”
Ryan laughed, his earlier foul mood slowly evaporating. “Sounds like I dodged a bullet.”
The two men groaned at his lame ass comment. “That’s one thing I haven’t missed,” Red said. “Your lame jokes.”
“Hot nurse alert, ten o’clock.” Cowboy hissed out of the corner of his mouth.
It took all of five seconds for Ryan to recognize who Cowboy was referring to. “Keep your dick in your pants. She’s off limits.”
“What?” Red looked at him as if he’d sprouted another head.
Fuck, I should’ve kept my mouth shut.
“Ryan, here you are. Dr. Morton thought you’d done a runner. He sent a couple of us looking for you.”
Yeah, he could tell how thrilled she was to have been tasked with looking for him. She’d spent the last few days avoiding him.
“Well you found me, and as you can see I’m fine.” His words came out harsher than he intended.
“Right,” Suzie crossed her arms over her chest, crushing the lightweight material of her scrub top. His dick twitched at the generous swell of her breasts. “Well you need to get yourself back in your room. Now, preferably.”
The guys snorted beside him, clearly enjoying seeing him get told off. They both stood. Yeah, they weren’t going to save his ass, they were itching to get back to base to tell the rest of the guys he was getting his butt whipped by a nurse.
“We were just leaving, ma’am,” Cowboy drawled, laying on a thick Texan accent, as if that would make Suzie swoon at his feet. But damn if a light pink hue didn’t crawl up her neck and bloom on her cheeks.
He glared at Cowboy, who winked at him. “Later, Joker,” he said and if he was wearing hat, Ryan would lay a hundred dollar bet that he’d tip it at Suzie as he walked past her.
“We need you back on the team, Joker,” Red informed him before he walked away, smiling at Suzie.
Oh man, without a doubt those two would be itching to get back to the other guys to relay what had just gone down in the hospital’s garden.
Silence stretched between him and Suzie. He’d half expected her to follow the guys back to the hospital. Not hang around with him. Was she waiting for him to go back to his room?
Ryan studied her a bit closer, noticing the tension lines bracketing her mouth and the furrow between her brow. He stood and walked closer to her. “Are you okay?” he asked softly and reached out to smooth the imperfection between her eyes. Suzie’s eyes drifted shut and she swayed a little. He hooked an arm around her and pulled her up against him.
A million sensations flowed through, prickling his skin. He breathed in the light flowery scent of her perfume. It would be so easy to lift her chin and kiss her. It had been too long since he’d been this close to a woman. Ironically, the last woman had been Suzie.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” she murmured and pulled away from him. He wanted to pull her close to him again, but he refrained when confusion clouded her blue eyes, giving them a stormy sea look.
“You’re right, I’m sorry.” He smoothed his hands down the sweatpants he wore. “I suppose I’d better get back to my room.”
“Yeah.”
Ryan hesitated, waiting to see if she would walk with him, but when her feet remained rooted to the spot he began to move.
“Wait,” Suzie called. She caught up to him, which wasn’t far as he’d only taken about five steps. “I wanted to ask you something.”
“You can ask me anything.”
Her mouth opened and then closed, as though she was trying to form the words but finding it difficult to do. “I’ve got a doctor’s appointment in a couple of days. I wanted to know if you wanted to come.”
Whatever he’d been expecting Suzie to ask, inviting him to her doctor’s appointment was the last thing he ever thought she’d say. “Yes. I’d love to.”
Damn, the words exploded out of him like cannon. He didn’t want to sound too eager, but this was huge. She was opening up her world to him and he planned to grasp it with two hands.
However, they’d got themselves into this situation, he planned on being by Suzie’s side as much as she’d let him. Their child deserved to have two parents who could get along. Who liked each other. And he liked Suzie, in fact, he wanted to get to know her more. Wanted to explore the possibility of seeing if they had a future together. Hell, some marriages started with less than what they had. The big question was, is this something Suzie wanted to pursue or did she want him to be a once a month kind of dad.
Chapter Five
If the receptionist gave Ryan one more side-eye glance, Suzie was going to march over there and scratch her eyes out. He was hers, not the other girl’s.
Whoa, settle down there. Ryan is not your man. He just happens to be the person who donated the necessary ingredient to make a baby.
Suzie closed her thoughts off. What the hell had she been thinking asking him to come to her appointment? Clearly sensible thought had left her when she found him sitting in the hospital’s rose garden with two of his work colleagues. If the girl behind the counter wanted to find herself a military man, Suzie would be more than happy to set her up with any one of the soldiers she saw on a regular basis. Anyone except the man sitting next to her.
Oh God, she needed to get a grip. There was nothing happening between her and Ryan.
Although you’d like there to be.
There was that voice again, telling her what she didn’t want to hear, even if there was an ounce of truth to it.
“Miss Waterson?”
Suzie stood at hearing her name, Ryan jumped up and winced as the movement jolted his injured leg. He’d been released from the hospital this morning and Suzie thought he probably could’ve done with another day of bedrest, but then he wouldn’t be able to be here with her. Maybe that would’ve been a better idea.
No. She wanted Ryan here. Now that the father of her baby was aware he was going to be a dad, she wanted him to be involved. It was apparent from the way he quickly answered her that he wanted to be a part of the process. There were many things they needed to discuss and perhaps, after her appointment, they could get something to eat and sort out some of the logistics of the situation they now found themselves in.
“Are you okay,” she asked him as they followed the nurse to the examination room.
“I’m fine. Keep forgetting that quick movements aren’t the best idea.”
“It will get better.”
He grunted a response.
“Miss Waterson, if you’d like to change into this and get up on the bed, the doctor will be with you shortly.” She handed Suzie a paper gown. “Sir, if you’d like to wait out here. Miss Waterson will let you know when you can enter the room.”
Suzie chuckled at the surprised look on Ryan’s face. Clearly, this nurse wasn’t swayed by a good looking guy. “I won’t be a minute,” she told Ryan as she closed the door.
She stripped quickly and donned the gown. “You can come in now,” she called out.
“Man, felt like I’d been called to the Commander’s office and was about to get roasted.”
“Do you get sent to the Commander’s office much?” Suzie settled herself on the bed, pulling the paper blanket up over her legs. There really was no point in warming her legs, they were only going to get cold the second she put them in the metal stirrups.
“Nah, not anymore.”
“But you used to?”
His lips quirked into a sexy smile, one that melted her insides. Great, the doctor was going to come in and know she was turned on by the man sitting in the chair next to her.
“In the early days I did things I shouldn’t have. I learned pretty quickly that guidelines and instructors are there for a reason.”
“They usually are,” she responded drily.
There was a brisk knock on the door, before it was opened and Suzie’s doctor poked her head around the wood. “Hi there, Suzie. All set?” Dr Jones asked.
Suzie nodded and the woman walked in, pausing when she spied Ryan beside her. “Hi, Dr. Jones, this is Ryan Smith and yes he’s the father of the baby.”
Dr. Jones didn’t miss a beat and strode over to Ryan holding her hand out. “Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Smith.”
“You as well,” Ryan stated.
“Okay then, let’s get started. How have you been feeling, Suzie?” Dr. Jones asked as she sat at the small desk in the room.
“Not too bad. The nausea has settled and I’m not as tired.”
“G ood. Good. You’re,” she glanced at the computer screen. “Coming up to thirteen weeks, so you’re entering your second trimester. You should start feeling a little more energized now.”
The doctor asked a few more questions and Suzie was aware of Ryan’s hand creeping ever so closer to where hers lay by her side.
“You ready to see this baby of yours?” The doctor asked.
“What?” Ryan’s hand closed the miniscule distance and gripped hers.
“I’m having an ultrasound today,” Suzie said quietly. It was one of the reasons she asked Ryan to come to the appointment.
“Is that dangerous for you and the baby?” he directed his question at her and not the doctor. It was oddly comforting to think he trusted her over a more qualified doctor.
Suzie squeezed his hand. “It’s totally fine. There’s no danger to either of us.”
“I suppose that was a really stupid question, considering the things I do and the fact that ultrasound is used in physical therapy sessions.” A light bloom of red slashed across his cheeks.
She smiled at him and held his gaze. “No, not stupid at all.”
They stared at each other for a few moments. The gold flecks in his hazel eyes stood out more than usual. Then again, this was the first time she’d really looked deeply into Ryan’s face. Her heart fluttered at the intensity he directed at her.
Special Forces: Operation Alpha: Guarding Suzie (Kindle Worlds Novella) Page 4