“I really want us to have the perfect wedding night and I was thinking that it would be good to abstain from sex until we are married,” she continued. “I know that’s not what you were expecting to hear right now, but I feel led to wait until we are married. Would that be okay with you?”
“Well, it’s not like you are asking me to wait that long. We will be married in a few weeks. It’s just going to be really difficult since we live together coupled with the fact that I am insanely wild about you.” Neil grinned widely. “Besides, do you really think you can keep your hands off me?” he asked waving his hands slightly up and down his body.
“It is going to be a challenge,” Kate said giggling, “but it will make our wedding night that much more special. Are you willing to try?”
“I’m willing to do anything for you, my beauty. All you have to do is ask and I will make it so. I love you and all I want is for you to feel safe and whole again.”
Kate looked downward. “Feeling whole might take a while. The trauma of Roger taking me is like a machine gun shooting holes in me. I’m kind of all over the place. One minute if feel fine, the next I feel like I’m going to cry or I do cry, and the next I want to hunt Roger down and throw him in a pit.”
“Baby, it sounds like you might have some post-traumatic stress going on. Dr. Cox should be able to help you and I can go with you to evening appointments if you want me to. I want you to be free of all of this. We have so much to look forward to—a wedding, a honeymoon, a new home, kids, maybe a dog. I know you want to finish college and start a career. There are so many good things right around the corner.”
“I know you’re right. The best part is sharing all of it with you. Do you have any idea how special you make me feel? I never knew love could be this way.”
Chapter 14
Roger sat across from Rose while they ate dinner. She hadn’t asked him too much about his fight with Paulina’s supposed boyfriend, but he had a feeling that she was about to question him. He had a sixth sense about these things.
“So, are you worried about Jacob?” she asked.
“Yes, but Paulina is a good mother and I have no doubt that she will take good care of him,” he said.
Roger knew his story had holes in it and he hoped that Rose didn’t ask any question that he wasn’t prepared to make up an answer for. He didn’t want to kill her—at least not yet. She was being useful to him right now.
“Have you tried to get a hold of him today?”
“I did while you were taking a shower,” he lied. “He said that everything was ’cool,’ as only a six-year-old boy can.”
“I don’t understand why you didn’t contact the police. Her boyfriend did assault you. You could press charges.”
“I know you’re right, but I just don’t want to rock the boat. Paulina hasn’t been happy in a long time and if this guy makes her happy then that’s a good thing.”
“That’s awfully big of you, considering what he has done.”
“I just don’t want any trouble,” Roger said. “It’s better this way. I’m so relieved that I can be here with you and that you are on my side.”
“Of course. Why would I be on anyone else’s side?”
“I’ve been a loner my whole life and I haven’t let anyone in—until you,” Roger said. “You believing in me means so much. I’ve been so worried about what you would think and how you would react to all of this. I need you Rose. I love you.”
“Oh, Roger, I love you, too,” she said, almost in tears. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m going to stand by your side and help you with Paulina and Jacob. I’ll do whatever it takes to help you get through this.”
“I guess if the truth be known, I’m afraid for Jacob. Paulina’s boyfriend is dangerous and he could hurt Jacob. I have to figure out a way to get him back. I’m considering taking him from school.”
“I can pick up Jacob if you like,” Rose offered. “If I need to, I’ll take a day off work so we can get him. I’m here for you. I adore Jacob, and think he is a terrific boy.”
Roger gave Rose his most charming smile. Keeping Rose in his life had been the best decision he had ever made. He could convince her of anything now that he had proclaimed his love for her. She was desperate to believe him. What a stupid bitch.
He had no idea how things had gone so terribly wrong. He thought he had devised a fool-proof plan. It started off rocky and intense, but eventually Kate warmed up to him and even seemed receptive. One minute his hands and mouth were roaming Kate’s beautiful body, the next he was laying on the ground bleeding. He figured her boyfriend was smart since he was a lawyer, but he had no idea how committed he was to Kate. In a way, he admired Neil for his tenacity in finding her. Most men would not have been able to do it. The only way he would have known was from Joyce. He must have gotten to her, scared her, and she buckled. He would have to deal with Joyce later, when this mess was behind him.
His admiration for Neil was short-lived since he equally hated him for ruining his plan. If it wasn’t for Neil, he and Kate would be together right now and who knows what they would be doing; probably something that involved her luscious mouth on his body. Roger was so pissed off at the whole situation, but all hope was not lost. He would go after Kate again and make sure that Neil couldn’t do a thing about it. He would kill Neil Statton and enjoy every second of it.
It was just too bad that he already had a girlfriend when he met Kate. If the old Rose hadn’t been in the way, he would have been able to get Kate, no problem. He knew that she liked him. But Kate wasn’t the type to take another woman’s man. One of the many things he really liked about her was her ethics. By the time he got around to getting rid of Rose, she was already entangled in a relationship with that asshole lawyer. Timing had not been on his side in this situation but he was going to come up with a way to turn this around.
His new Rose was going to be an enormous asset to him and he would take full advantage of her willingness to help. Maybe he could convince her to get a letter to Kate. Kate needed to know that he still wanted her and that he was prepared to do whatever was necessary to have her in his life. If he could convince Kate that they were meant to be together, then maybe she would not press charges against him for kidnapping her.
Chapter 15
Kate sat in the waiting room of Dr. Cox’s office, checking her emails because she was a few minutes early. Henderson was in the chair next to her with a stoic look on his face. Hicks was outside the door guarding. When his office door opened, Kate saw a familiar face. Michelle walked out, somewhat teary eyed.
“Michelle,” Kate said. “It’s so good to see you.”
“Hi, Kate. I’m so thrilled to run into you,” Michelle said, hugging her.
“You remember Henderson from coming over,” Kate asked motioning toward Henderson.
“Yes I do. Nice to see you again,” Michelle said. Henderson nodded.
“How are you doing?” Kate asked.
“I’m good. It’s just my second session, but Dr. Cox is amazing. I’m really grateful to have him to talk to about everything. Thank you so much for recommending him.”
“You’re welcome and I know what you mean. He is a great therapist. He listens so well but is also filled with such incredible insight. I don’t know what I’d do without him,” Kate said, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind her ear.
“Wow, that’s some rock you have there,” Michelle said, taking Kate’s hand. “So your boyfriend proposed?”
“On Friday night. It was very romantic.”
“Well, I’d love for us to get together for coffee again and hear all about your proposal,” Michelle said. “Why don’t you call me when you’re free and we can get together?”
“Definitely,” Kate said. “I really enjoyed it when you came over.”
“Yeah, me too,” Michelle said. “Well, I need to get going. I have a hair appointment in twenty minutes.”
“It was great to see you and I’ll be in touch. Have
fun at the beauty salon.”
Michelle nodded and said, “Talk to you soon.”
Kate went in and sat on the black leather sofa. Dr. Cox was finishing some notes, but he nodded in her direction. She put her hand bag on the coffee table and settled into the comfy sofa. After a moment, she decided to lie down. She already knew that this session required her to be in a supine position. Dr. Cox put his notes to the side and smiled at her.
“Okay, from your message it sounds like you have been through quite a bit since we last spoke,” he said. “Tell me what happened and how you’re doing.”
Kate recounted the events from Friday and the dreams that she had been having since her kidnapping. Dr. Cox listened intently, concern weighing heavily on his face.
“It’s completely understandable that you are experiencing bad dreams. You were terrorized by Roger and it’s the only way your mind can make sense of it all right now,” he said. “You can think of the dreams as a coping mechanism. It will get easier after he is caught and you are no longer in danger. You will have closure when Roger is convicted and eventually the dreams will stop as your mind accepts that you are finally safe.”
Kate took in a deep breath and said, “That makes complete sense. I can’t wait for all of this to be over. I just want Neil and I to get on with our lives.”
“You will,” he said. “But don’t think that marriage is going to make everything perfect. Marriage takes hard work from both people. Are you and Neil considering premarital counseling? I highly recommend it.”
“Do you really think it’s necessary?” she said. “We get along so well, and have already faced the death of my father, and now this.”
“That’s great, but marriage has its own set of complications that many people are not prepared for.”
“Can you give me an example?” she asked.
“Sure. Unmet expectations.”
Kate stared at Dr. Cox with a puzzled look on her face, unsure of what he was talking about.
“For instance, let’s say you and Neil are going to take a road trip. When you were growing up, your dad did all of the planning and navigating on the trip. Your mom didn’t read the map or direct your dad. She sat there passively. Maybe in Neil’s family, his dad relied on his mom for direction and she was in charge of the map and telling him what roads to take. So now that you and Neil are going on your own trip, you expect to sit back and relax while he drives and navigates.
“Meanwhile, he expects you to steer him in the right direction. This, in turn, causes you two to have a disagreement because you each are expecting something that you didn’t even know you were expecting from the other person. Until the expectation is broken, you don’t have any idea that the expectation exists. This, and other ways that we fail to communicate, can cause a lot of problems in marriage.”
“Wow, I had no idea, but yes, that makes sense,” Kate said. “I’ll talk to Neil about us coming in together. It’s really important to me that we start our marriage off on the right foot. In the meantime, I want to start seeing you once a week again, at least until Roger is caught, and probably through his trial. I need your support. Do you think that is wise?”
“Whatever you need, Kate. I’m here for you. You don’t have to go through any of this alone. You have me, Neil, Charlie, Nat, and your family. So we can schedule whatever you like and we can even do some phone sessions if you need to.”
“Thank you, Dr. Cox.” Kate started making standing appointments for each Monday at four, until Dr. Cox mentioned that perhaps that wouldn’t be the wisest move, while Roger may or may not still be watching her. Although she hadn’t wanted to think that still a possibility, it did make more sense to be less predictable, despite her desire for normal life to resume.
Driving home, Kate realized that it was time to call her mom. They hadn’t spoken since their argument. She knew that her mom was more stubborn than she, and wouldn’t make the first move. The proverbial ball was in Kate’s court. Despite not looking forward to their conversation, she knew it was necessary, especially since she was getting married in a few weeks. She didn’t want to exclude her mother from her wedding. That would only cause more injury to their already wounded relationship. All of her chances to have a relationship with her father had been exhausted, but she could still salvage something with her mother.
Kate walked in the door with the intention of calling her mom. Neil wasn’t home yet. He had texted that he was working late tonight, so she decided she would make dinner and then call her mom. While taking out the pots that she needed to prepare their meal, she suddenly had a flashback to the cabin. Roger was holding her in the kitchen, rubbing her and kissing her. She began shaking, just thinking about his body against hers. She was going to have to get a hold of herself. After making her way to the sofa, she sat down for a few minutes, trying to focus on the fact that she had been saved from her disaster. Even though she now had more than one guard protecting her, she still didn’t feel safe.
She was going to have to figure out a way to take her life back. Hating that Roger continued to have some power over her, Kate took in several deep breaths in an attempt to calm her spirit. Fear for Neil’s life still welled up inside even though she had insisted that he have two guards as well. She continued breathing deeply and her thoughts turned toward going to church with Natalie and the peace that had brought to her. Since dinner wasn’t going to make itself, she pushed through her panic and began preparing spaghetti and meat sauce. She had picked up some freshly baked bread on her way home. Some good old fashioned Italian was just what the doctor ordered.
While the meat sauce was simmering, she called her mom. Her anxiety about the conversation was pretty high, but she was a grown woman and she had to face her fears.
“Hi, Mom,” she said with a soft voice.
“Kate,” her mom responded coolly.
“Mom, listen. I know that our relationship is far from perfect, but I would like us to work things out. You’re the only mother that I’m going to have and I’m your only daughter. I don’t want to be at odds with you. I don’t want us to have a relationship like you and grandma.”
“Neither do I, Kate. I would like for us to be closer as well. I’m sorry for keeping things from you. It’s just that failing at marriage was the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I don’t want to reopen old wounds that I have worked so hard to put behind me. I realize that I shouldn’t have kept you and your father from having a relationship. For that, I am extremely sorry.”
Kate couldn’t believe her ears. Her mom was being humble and sincere. It was a welcome change. She couldn’t recall a time when her mom had ever apologized for hurting her.
“I can understand wanting to put the pain behind you and move on, Mom,” she said. “Getting over the loss of David was the hardest thing that I’ve ever had to do.”
“I know honey, thank you for understanding. You have been through some hard times in your life as well.”
“A lot has happened since we last spoke. I’ll start with the good news. Neil and I are getting married on New Year’s Eve. He proposed on Friday.”
“Oh, I see,” her mom said bluntly. “I don’t want to be a wet blanket, but don’t you think it’s a little fast for you two to get married? You’ve only known him a few months.”
“I know that it’s fast, but I also know that he is the one for me,” Kate said. She wasn’t going to debate her mom in the appropriate amount of time to date someone. “I hope that you can be happy for me. I would like for us to get together soon. I have so much to do for the wedding. I’d love your input and it would be great if we could do some shopping together. I need help finding a dress. I tried some on at David’s Bridal and I need help narrowing it down to the right one. We can find a dress for you too.”
“I would really like that, honey. All I want is for you to be happy. I will support your choices,” her mom said. “So, when can I meet Neil?”
“How about we meet for dinner tomorrow night? I
’m meeting with the wedding planner in the afternoon. We could meet at Mimi’s afterward?”
“Okay, that sounds good. Why don’t you call me when you are done and I’ll meet you and Neil there?”
“That sounds good.”
“You said you would start with the good news. Does that mean there is bad news?”
“Everything is okay, but… .” How do you tell your mother that you were kidnapped by a killer? “Um…Roger, our previous landlord, kidnapped me on Friday afternoon,” Kate said. She hurried on before her mother could get too upset. “Neil found me that night. Nothing irreversible happened. Neil got to me before… .”
“Oh Kate…I don’t know what to say, honey. Are you okay? Do you need me to come over?” “Yeah, I’m fine. You don’t need to come over, but I appreciate you offering. I went to see Dr. Cox today, which helped a lot. The problem is that Roger is still at large and the police don’t have any idea where he is at this time. Neil has added extra security so I feel completely safe right now.”
“Are you sure you are safe? You can always come home. Roger wouldn’t expect you to leave your boyfriend.”
“No, he probably wouldn’t, but I’m safer here. It’s a security building and I have two guards with me at all times.”
“Okay. I’m just so worried about you.”
“I know mom. I’ll tell you more when I see you tomorrow night. I need to finish making dinner.”
“Okay, see you tomorrow” Before the line disconnected, her mom continued, “Kate, I love you. Please know that if you need me, I’ll be there. “
“Oh, mom, I love you too. I needed to hear that from you right now. Thank you.”
“Anytime sweetie, anytime.”
Kate ended her call and felt warmth spreading through her body; perhaps she and her mother could have an adult relationship. Finally. She had stood her ground and it had turned out okay. Her mom had to accept that she was a grown woman and could make her own decisions. After all, she was about to get married. It doesn’t get any more grown-up than that.
Given to You Page 11