I attempt to extract myself from her death grip, but she hangs on tight.
“Sweetheart,” I say gently, “you’re going to have to let me go so I can kill it.”
Not that I want her to. If she hung on to me like this all damn night, I’d be a happy man. She’s wearing a clingy blue tank top and matching hip-hugging boy shorts that barely cover her ass. The outfit is sexy and sweet.
The problem is, now that I’m finally waking up, so is my dick. As she snuggles closer to me, I realize that I’m not going to be able to conceal my growing excitement. Pun intended.
“I gotta get in there, Em.”
“Okay,” she whispers, nodding. “Okay, right.”
A few moments later, she takes a tiny step back and releases me.
Gritting my teeth, I step into the room and look around for something I can use to smash the fucker to death. My eyes land on “The Joy of Sex,” sitting prominently on the bookshelf, and I snort with laughter. I’d stolen this book from the bookshelf on more than one occasion when I’d hit puberty. After this, it’s going in the garbage.
Taking a deep breath, I slam the book against the wall with all my might.
It’s dead on impact—a big, blue smoosh on the once perfectly white wall. The rest of the body sticks to the book.
“Ugh,” I groan, staring at the oversized, gross carcass.
Emmy peeks from between her fingers and lets out a long, shuddering sigh of relief. I’m her hero right now; our previous argument is a thing of the past.
“Oh, God. Thank you so much, Will.”
“No worries.” I toss the book in the garbage can. “I’ll be right back.”
Hunting around in the washroom, I grab a hand towel from the linen closet, run it under the tap, and get to work scrubbing the disgusting evidence off of the wall. Afterward, I pitch the towel in the trash and wash my hands.
Emmy’s still standing in the doorway when I go back out into the room, hugging herself and staring at the bed.
“Em? You okay?”
“Yeah. Just creeped out I guess.” She scans the walls, trying to see if the monster left behind any of his squad.
“That was the biggest spider I’ve ever seen,” I admit. “Even I’ve got a case of the creeps.”
She makes a face. “I know. How do you think it got in here?”
I shrug. “This place has been closed up for a year. But if I had to guess, it probably came in on your suitcase. Crawled up from the dock, most likely. Dock spiders are a thing.”
“Oh, gross!” She closes her eyes. “Do you think there’s any more of them in the house?”
“Christ, I hope not. One is enough.”
Emmy’s spider phobia goes beyond a simple hatred of creepy crawlies. She’s got major arachnophobia. Sully chased her around with a daddy long legs one summer when we were kids, and she’d gotten so upset she’d vomited from fright. His mom grounded him for a week.
Emmy stares into the room again and bites her bottom lip. She still looks terrified.
Fuck. I know what I gotta do, and I shouldn’t. I really shouldn’t.
But of course, I do.
“Em, do you want to stay with me tonight?” I nod toward my bedroom. “The bed is king-sized, so there’s plenty of room if you’re too scared to go back in there.” I pause and backpedal a little. “Or, you can sleep in one of the other bedrooms.”
A look of relief crosses her face. “No, I’ll stay with you. Are you sure you don’t mind?”
I wave my hand. “Nah. It’s not like you snore or anything, right?”
I’m struggling not to stare at her in those sexy pajamas. Jesus, she looks hot.
Emmy smiles. “No, I don’t snore. That’s Sully.”
“Don’t I know it. I room with Sul when the team is on the road. I invested in a year’s supply of earplugs. No joke.”
She laughs. “Oh, I bet.”
I figure she’s going to change her outfit since she’ll be sleeping in my room, but she doesn’t. She just walks right on into my bedroom. I follow, my gaze dropping to that tight little ass. Those perky cheeks would fit nicely in my cupped hands. Perfectly, in fact.
“Will?” Her voice is soft and sweet and hits me right in the gut.
I jerk my gaze away from her behind and up to her face. “Yeah?”
Upside: she’s looking at me with those beautiful green eyes that glow like a perfect piece of jade in the moonlight, and it takes my breath away.
Downside: I’m 100% certain she just caught me staring at her ass.
Fuck, what’s the opposite of Viagra? I need a boner killer, STAT.
Sadly, the next few days are only going to be more of the same: Will vs. The Constant Hard-On. It will be hell trying to hide my crotch salute around this girl—especially when she says my name like that.
“Can you check around? You know, for more spiders?”
I glance around the room, seeing nothing on the walls.
“I know it’s stupid, but I’m so freaked out.” She’s looking at me like I’m her hero again, and I know I’ll do anything she asks.
Thankfully, there isn’t much furniture in this room, so it won’t take long to investigate. I grab my phone from the nightstand and turn on the flashlight. I peek behind two pictures on the wall and then check under the bed and behind the dresser.
“We’re all clear, Em.”
She sighs with relief as we climb under the covers. I turn off the light, but the moon is shining in through the skylight so brightly that I can see her perfectly when she rolls over to face me.
“Will, were you… uh, checking out my butt a minute ago?” She looks equal parts amused and curious.
Busted.
“What? No.” I sound defensive and guilty, because obviously, I am.
She grins. “Be honest.”
I roll over onto my back and drape my arm behind my head. “Go to sleep, Em.”
“Come on! You can tell me. I won’t care.”
“Look, I’m a guy. I’m going to notice if a woman is wearing sexy shorts, no matter who the woman is, okay?”
“Okay.” She pauses. “Do you think my shorts are sexy, or that I look sexy in them?”
Oh, Lord. This conversation is moving into dangerous territory. Minefields. Minefields everywhere.
I glance over to see her watching me with those big green eyes. “What’s with all the questions?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know.”
Neither do I, but I have a feeling this conversation is about more than my opinion of her ass. She looks vulnerable.
“Both,” I finally admit.
Emmy frowns. “Both what?”
“The shorts are sexy, and you look sexy in them.”
To my surprise, she blushes. “Oh. Well, thank you.”
I snort. “Don’t thank me. It’s just a simple fact.”
“I don’t know about that,” she says quietly. “I have a few of these outfits, and Aidan didn’t even notice me when I wore them to bed.”
“That’s because he’s a fucking douchebag.” It comes out way harsher than I intended, but I don’t apologize. The guy’s a dick.
A few moments pass before she speaks again.
“Will, what did you mean when you said you weren’t interested in being another brother to me?”
Me and my big fucking mouth. “Em, listen—”
“Is it because you’re attracted to me?” she asks, interrupting me. “Is that the reason you said it?”
I sigh and run my hands down over my face. “There’s not a safe way for me to answer that question. You know that.”
“Yes, there is. Just be honest.”
I swallow, wishing I’d brought a bottle of water up here with me. I’m pretty sure the temperature’s just shot up ten degrees in this room. I’m on the hot seat with nowhere to go.
“You’re really pretty, Em. You know that.”
“That’s not an answer.”
I squeeze my eyes shut. “Of course I�
�m attracted to you. Like I just said, you’re pretty. I’m sure lots of guys find you attractive. What’s the big deal?”
“It’s just that all of this seems different because we’re alone. It feels intimate. I’m…” She takes a deep breath. “I’m attracted to you too, Will.”
My heart knocks hard against my ribs, and I launch myself upright. I’ve completely lost the ability to play it cool after hearing her admit that.
It means the shiver I’d felt when I put my arms around her earlier today hadn’t just been in my head. I’d caused that reaction.
I’m both vindicated and totally freaked out. I’ve carried a torch for this girl for over three years. Knowing she feels something too, even if it’s just simple physical attraction, destroys me. It’s not like I can do anything about it. And I definitely can’t encourage it.
Emmy places her hand on my stomach, and I freeze. I’m helpless as I watch her slim fingers trace along my abs, slowly moving across the soft, dark-blond hair that disappears under my sleep pants.
“I know I said that I wanted to find a guy up here and hook up. But Will, why can’t that guy be you? I’d feel so much better if it was you. I trust you completely.”
My dick springs to life once again, and this time, there’s no hiding it, not with her hand so close and moving lower.
“That’s not a good idea,” I manage, my voice straining.
“Why not? We’re both adults, and we’re attracted to each other.” Her eyes hold a naughty gleam as her gaze drops to the front of my pants. “That much is obvious. So what’s the harm?”
What’s happening right now is everything that I’ve ever wanted and feared rolled into one.
Somehow, I find the strength to reach down and remove her hand from my stomach before it goes any lower.
That’s a pretty big deal, because I want her to touch me more than I even want air. I’m desperate for her to slide her hand under my sleep pants. I fucking need her hand on my cock. I want her above me, under me, and next to me. Years of pent up desire are totally screwing with my head right now.
“The big deal is that we’re friends,” I croak. I clear my throat and try again. “Do you actually think that we could ever go back to being friends after we’ve had sex? Not to mention the fact that your brother would fucking kill me.”
Emmy sits up and crosses her arms. “Sully doesn’t have a say in who I see or what I do, no matter what he thinks. Do you know he threatened Aidan during Christmas dinner?”
I think back to how Aidan came out of that room, pale and shaking. I don’t want to be on the other side of Sully’s wrath.
“Sully’s my best friend and my teammate. I’m not going to betray him like that. And the fact of the matter is that I can’t risk losing either one of you over something like this, Em. I’m closer to you guys than I am to anyone in the world since my parents died. You know I’ve got no other family. There’s too much for me to lose.”
“So you do think of me like family,” she accuses.
“No.” I drag my hands down my face. “That’s not what I mean. I see you as someone I can’t risk losing over a few nights of sex. Even if it was amazing, mind-blowing sex. Can’t you understand that?”
A sad look crosses her face, but she gives a reluctant nod. “Yeah, I guess I do.” A moment passes before she asks, “Do you really think it would be amazing sex?”
She rolls onto her side and props herself up on her elbow.
“Oh, yeah.” I reach over and trace my thumb along her jaw. “It would be fucking incredible, Sunshine.”
I quickly pull my hand away. No matter what I said, I still don’t trust my resolve enough to keep touching her.
“Oh, Will.” Her breath hitches once, then again before she bows her head. Her long brown hair falls over her cheek, hiding her beautiful face.
I nearly come apart hearing those sweet little breaths and my name on her lips. Telling her “no” goes against everything I feel. I want to do what’s right, but it’s Emmy, dammit.
Em lifts her head, and her eyes are misty. “I promise you won’t lose me, Will. Ever. I need you in my life. You know that.”
I squeeze my eyes shut. Christ, this is brutal.
“I know, but I need to make sure that never happens. I can’t say yes. No matter how attracted I am to you, I can’t say yes. I’m sorry.”
She turns away, and the disappointed look on her face haunts me.
I lie awake in the darkness, staring out at the moon through the skylight. Twenty minutes later, her breathing goes soft and even, and I know she’s finally fallen asleep.
Having to turn down the girl I adore kills me. Knowing that she wants me as much as I want her gives me a spark of hope.
Hope, that traitorous bitch of an emotion, whispers that maybe I can figure out a way to make everything work out. That maybe I can really have it all, and with little consequence.
But I cut off Hope’s eternally optimistic attitude at the goddamn knees.
After I’d been informed that my parents were killed in the plane crash, Hope had shown her ugly face then, too. Hope whispered that it couldn’t be true. That it must have been some other family’s private plane that had crashed into that field.
Emmy and Sully have been the two constants in my life besides hockey since that horrible, life-changing day. Losing them is something I can never let happen.
So no matter how badly I want Emmy, I just can’t have her.
Chapter Four
EMMY
I awaken violently and spring from the bed. I’m overwhelmed with panic and completely disoriented. Bending at the knees, I wrap my arms around my middle and draw large gulps of air into my lungs until I realize where I am. I’m at the cottage, in Will’s room.
Well, that certainly doesn’t make me any less anxious.
This kind of panic upon waking has been happening off and on for months, and I’m so over it. I’m in a near-constant state of worry lately—over college, my future, and my parent’s divorce.
Thankfully, Will’s still sound asleep after my panic attack. He has one hand resting on his flat, muscled stomach and the other behind his head. His dark blond hair hangs down over his right eye, and his full lips are slightly parted. The temptation to lean in and brush the hair off of his forehead and wake him with a sweet kiss is almost too much.
Having these kinds of feelings is still a little weird to me. After all, it’s Will. The same Will who used to chase me around our backyard with his laser gun when we were little, and who teased me endlessly when I tried out for cheerleading and couldn’t remember the words to the cheers.
Still, I can’t deny my feelings. Every single time I look at him, my body goes nuts: sweaty palms, fluttery stomach, and a racing heart.
When he’d turned me down last night, everything began to ache—my head, my stomach, and my throat.
But most of all, my heart.
Giving him one final glance, I turn and walk across the hall to use the bathroom before trudging downstairs to the kitchen. The only thing I should focus on right now is making myself a few cups of coffee. I need the soothing, familiar aroma and taste of freshly roasted java to make it through the rest of this day.
Sure, alcohol would be more effective, but it’s way too early for that. And other than the occasional beer, I’m not much of a drinker. Past experience proves that I can’t hold my liquor at all. It’s usually an unfortunate situation for me and anyone within puking distance.
I take a seat at the kitchen island while I wait for the coffee to brew. After trying to read the same Cosmopolitan article four times, I give up. Thoughts of last night completely distract me.
I wish I’d been smart enough to let it go after propositioning him the first time, but I wasn’t. No, I had to try to convince him to sleep with me.
When we were lying in bed together, and he reached over and stroked my face?
Oh. My. God.
I’d been scorched by that hot blue gaze; my panties had
gotten wet with just a look. I’ve never been that turned on by a guy before.
Then he’d shot me down cold. Again.
I bury my head in my hands and take a breath while my stomach churns at the memory. How in the hell am I going to face him today?
After two cups of coffee, I go back upstairs to shower and get ready for the day, still turning over last night’s humiliation in my mind. If this were any other guy, it wouldn’t cut me so deep.
Logically, I completely understand Will’s reasons for not acting on his attraction. But the logic doesn’t make it hurt any less.
I head back downstairs after packing a bag to take to the lake. I make a third cup of coffee and pour myself a big bowl of cereal.
The best thing to do is distance myself from Will for the day. Anything is better than being here at the cottage, where the awkwardness is sure to be like a living, breathing entity.
Ten minutes later, Will comes downstairs, freshly showered and wearing faded blue Levi’s and a gray Toronto Smoke t-shirt.
“Morning, Em.” He nods toward my mug. “Any coffee left?”
“Plenty.”
I gulp down the leftover milk in my cereal bowl and swallow the rest of my coffee, scalding my tongue in the process. It’s a small price to pay to get the hell out of here. No way am I hanging around and making small talk. Uh-uh.
“I’m heading down to the lake for the day,” I tell him, placing my empty bowl and mug into the dishwasher.
Will leans against the counter and lifts the coffee mug to his lips. “A little early yet, don’t you think?”
I paste on a smile. “The early bird has all the fun, right?”
As I turn to walk away, he puts his hand on my arm. His fingers are warm, and I fight off another shiver.
“Em, wait.” His voice is low and soft. “Look, I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings last night.”
“It’s fine. It’s not a big deal.”
“Bullshit,” he replies. “We admitted that we’re attracted to each other. We talked about having sex. It’s a huge fucking deal.”
Unbreakable Page 3