by Rick Cook
"I claim quest companion’s right to stand in the front rank," proclaimed Glandurg, stepping forward.
Wiz sighed and nodded. "Okay. Take the extreme right of the line then. Jerry, you and Danny stay to either side of me." Malkin stepped forward. "Malkin, you stay with Jerry." June moved up next to Danny and Wiz didn’t waste breath trying to tell her where to stand.
"Now the first wave of the second rank will be mixed wizards and guardsmen. Shamus, I’ll leave it to you and Bal-Simba to order that, but I want Bal-Simba and some of the Mighty behind them. Moira, you stay in the rear with the guardsmen and Bal-Simba."
He took a deep breath. "Okay, then. We go in fast and try to hit this thing hard and all at once. Our primary objective is to get Taj close enough to this thing to throw the grenade at it." Then he paused and looked at his companions. "Our secondary objective," Wiz said grimly, "is to protect the dragon from my wife." No one mentioned the third objective.
Wiz looked at the people arrayed around him. One by one those in the first fine signaled they were ready. He looked over his shoulder and saw the second line was ready to go too.
"Wait a minute," Jerry said. "I’ve got something to go in first." He spoke a phrase, gestured and suddenly there were hundreds of fluffy pink Rambo bunnies on the floor, with machine guns slung and drums at the ready. The mechanical rabbits turned and started down the tunnel in loose order, some going straight on and some dodging from cover to cover.
Wiz’s eyebrows shot up, but he watched the "recon element" go marching, dodging and banging up the tunnel without comment.
"It knows how to deal with those," Taj pointed out.
"Yeah, but they’ll give it something else to think about."
Almost immediately the tunnel was filled with smoke, gunfire, roars, screams and colored lights. Bits of bunny, pieces of monster, boonie rags, cartridge cases, chunks of rock and other, less identifiable objects came flying out of the tunnel.
"That’s our cue, folks," Wiz yelled "Hit ’em!" With a yell the group charged down the tunnel and into bedlam.
The surviving rabbits were still blasting their way forward but not all the defenders had been suckered into attacking them. Three steps into the tunnel a giant spider dropped from the ceiling, aiming for Wiz’s face. He blasted it with a lightning bolt that sent showers of dirt and rock down on the party and kept going without breaking stride. Another step and a wall of flame came roaring down the tunnel, only to turn aside and break back under the impact of Wiz and Jerry’s spells. Meanwhile, Malkin speared something on her rapier that writhed horribly and screamed like a dying child. Wiz had only a sickening glimpse of it before Malkin tossed it back into the maelstrom before them with a flick of her blade.
Two more steps and an undead dragon reared up before them. It took the combined fire of all the wizards and several mighty strokes from Blind Fury to cripple the monster and a liquid-oxygen spell from Jerry combined with a deluge of water from Wiz to freeze the thing solid. As they scrambled over the still-straining monster, the walls of the tunnel began to constrict on them like a throat. Jerry used a spell to force the tunnel to dilate, but he could only handle a few feet at a time. They pushed on step by step with Jerry dilating and Wiz freezing the tunnel in place repeatedly.
That left Danny to handle the attacking monsters, and his methods, while generally effective, tended to be chosen for creativity. Wiz was especially impressed with the spell that created four equidistant points of strong gravitational potential around the circumference of the tunnel. It not only ripped a herd of charging tyranosaurs into little, bloody pieces, but it plastered the remains tightly against the wall so the attackers didn’t have to wade through them. His method of handling the giant acid slug left Wiz less impressed, primarily because the leftover slime was eating through his boots. The Tajmanian Devil was busy, too, although Wiz couldn’t be sure what he was up to. He thought Taj was responsible for stopping the horde of armored skeletons that fell apart into piles of bones as they came down the tunnel.
Wiz couldn’t see what was going on in the back, either. However, the yells, screams, banging and other noises told him the other waves had their hands full as well.
The air began to grow clammy and the temperature in the tunnel dropped perceptibly. Then mist began rising from the tunnel floor. Jerry and Wiz dispersed it as best they could with their staffs, but it came back ever thicker until it was a wall in front of them. Then it grew thicker yet, until it swirled around them, confining each of them in their own little bubble.
Almost touching, but isolated by fog and freezing wind, the party forged ahead into the chamber. There were bits of ice in the fog that stung against skin and eyes, distracting them and making them lower their heads. Wiz gripped his staff tighter and held his cloak before him to try to shield himself from the magical storm. Dimly he could see Danny and Taj as darker forms forcing their way ahead on either side of him, but the rest of the party was utterly lost from view and hearing. Belatedly he realized they should stop and regroup, but there was no way to communicate with the others. So he lowered his head again and concentrated on putting one foot ahead of the other on the treacherous icy floor.
The going was easier for some than others. In a few paces their neatly formed line had grown ragged and then dissolved completely.
"Wiz!" Taj yelled, and tossed the sphere to him. Wiz caught it in both hands, juggling globe and staff as the wind whipped and lashed at him.
Suddenly the wind tore the fog away and there was Moira, sitting on a throne carved of black glass. Rising behind her was a black, gelatinous mass that shimmered and rippled as if from the wind.
His wife stood and held out her arms.
"Come, darling," she breathed. "Come to me."
Wiz’s breath caught in his throat. She was as beautiful as ever. Her flaming hair a mane about her and her green eyes as wide and inviting as he remembered. Beneath the shimmering green gown he could see her belly swelling with new life. She extended her arms to him in open, aching invitation.
"Kiss me. Oh, kiss me, Wiz."
In spite of himself Wiz took a step forward, the grenade loose in his fingers. Suddenly Moira froze. She twisted and shrank in on herself. There where Moira had been was a large green frog.
Wiz gasped and stepped back. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Danny blow on his fingertips, like a gunfighter blowing gunsmoke from the barrel of his six gun.
"Ribbet," said Moira.
With a convulsive jerk, Wiz hurled the golden globe over Moira’s head in the direction of the shining mass.
The sphere hit the dais beside the throne, but a hungry black pseudopod lashed out and scooped it up and into the glistening thing behind.
There were flashes within the ice, blue and green and red and orange, like the largest, most gorgeous fire opal that ever was. The cavern shook and a high, grating noise seemed to come from everywhere at once. The surface bulged and pulsed and heaved like gelatin going over speed bumps.
The mass seemed to slump in on itself and the flashes dimmed and died. Then it was an ordinary block of ice with shadowy forms embedded in it.
The wind died, the fog dissipated as rapidly as it had come and the party found themselves standing in a large room crudely hewed from the rock.
Moira was pirouetting in static little circles, her arms flung out
"Free!" she crowed, a wonderful silvery sound, "I’m free."
She stumbled back against Wiz and he caught her close. "I’m also a little unbalanced," she said, looking down at her swollen abdomen. Wiz lifted her chin and kissed her passionately, holding on as if for dear life.
Fluffy let out a plaintive wheep as if to say he wasn’t sure what had happened but he wasn’t at all happy about it
Wiz broke his hold on Moira and looked over her shoulder at Danny.
"If that change hurt the baby:"
"Relax," Danny said. "I didn’t morph her. It was just an illusion." He gestured at Glandurg and the dwarf instantly
shrank into a particularly warty and unappealing brown toad. Before anyone could react, he gestured again and there was Glandurg.
"Stupid mortal tricks," the dwarf muttered.
Moira laid her hand on her husband’s sleeve. "No, I am fine. Honestly love. Never better."
"You!" came a roar from the cavern entrance. Wiz and the others turned as King Tosig stomped into the chamber with a half-dozen dwarves trailing behind. Their armor was bent, their shields were battered and their battle axes were nicked and scarred. Tosig’s blade was as damaged as those of his followers and he held it aloft in a way that boded no good. Instinctively Wiz took a tighter grip on his staff and the guardsmen moved between the wizards and the oncoming dwarves. Tosig ignored the mortals. "Come here, you," he roared, pointing at Glandurg. "I want to talk to you."
"Uncle!" exclaimed Glandurg, a little apprehensively. "I mean Your Majesty. I am here:"
"I don’t care what you’ve been up to, you young hooligan!" King Tosig bellowed
"Come here and give me that sword!"
"Of course, Uncle." Glandurg whipped Blind Fury from its scabbard and brandished it aloft, nearly eviscerating King Tosig Longbeard in the process.
"Give me that, you silly nit!" the dwarf king snarled and grabbed the sword from his relative’s hand.
"I was going to present it to you proper," Glandurg sounded hurt. "With a bow and all."
Tosig only snorted.
"Well, there it is."
E.T. Tajikawa stepped up and examined the glistening mass. "It probably wasn’t alive anyway," Taj said.
Wiz looked at the wall of ice and the shadow forms embedded in it. So this was the Enemy. He knew he should feel something. Rage, triumph, something. But looking at the glassy mass he couldn’t work up any emotion at all.
Then he turned back to Moira and all the emotions in the world overwhelmed him. Meanwhile, the dwarves had been busy looting since the end of the battle. Parties of six or seven disappeared down every tunnel and poked into each room, returning laden with boxes, bags and chests. From the rapidly growing piles it appeared that they were almost as good at looting as they were at fighting. Malkin wandered over to inspect one of the piles, needless of the dwarves’ glares. Jerry could have sworn she kept her hands clasped behind her back the whole time, but she returned to him with a suspiciously lumpy tunic. Bal-Simba turned to Tosig.
"Will you come back with us to the Wizards’ Keep? We owe you a debt and wish to thank you properly."
"Alas, we must return immediately to our own land," the dwarf long said, "We will arrange our own transportation from here."
Down the corridor dwarves were carrying boxes and bales out of one of the rooms and stacking them in the middle of the floor. Bal-Simba pointedly ignored the looting.
"Mementos of our trip," Tosig said and Bal-Simba nodded.
"Do not delay your departure over-long. It is our intent to see that this place gives us no more trouble."
"Gone we shall be right enough," Tosig said and turned away. "Hey, you," he yelled to his scavengers, "hurry up with all that. We haven’t got all day." Wiz and Moira were still locked in an embrace, oblivious to everything around them until Fluffy pushed his head between them by main force and wheeped for petting and reassurance. Absent-mindedly Wiz compiled.
"Poor dragon," Moira said without taking her eyes off Wiz’s face, "This must be so hard for him to understand."
"I’m not sure I understand it," Wiz told her. "Except that you’re back just the way you were and all’s well that ends well."
"Well," said Moira, green eyes twinkling, "to tell the truth, I do feel an urge to go chase a cat"
She laughed at his expression. "No, I am fine." Then she looked down. "Bloated, swollen, clumsy, but fine."
"You’re beautiful," Wiz said with all the conviction in the world. "You’ve never been more beautiful than you are right now."
Fluffy wheeped because Wiz had stopped petting him. This time he was ignored. This isn’t the end of it, you know," Moira said softly.
She was right. There would be others like this thing to deal with. This wasn’t the last such entity that would come to be in out-of-the-way comers of the World. For the rest of his time here he and the others would face that problem and the problem wouldn’t stop when he died.
Then Wiz Zumwalt looked down at his obviously pregnant wife and hugged her even tighter to him. "No," he said softly, "it’s only beginning."
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