by Amy DeMeritt
Sam scoffs and laughs as she shoves my shoulder, making me fall over onto Madison’s lap.
“You better not be saying I’m like my mother.” Madison and I laugh and Sam makes the most adorable pouty face. “No, you’re not exactly like your mother. Your mom likes to show her affections to embarrass you, but you show your affections out of love. Don’t you dare stop being like that. I love that you freely express your love and affections.”
Sam smiles really big and pulls me into a kiss. When she pulls back, she runs her fingers through my hair and playfully bites the tip of my nose with a smile.
“When we go home, what’s your dynamic with Symone going to be?” Her smile fades some, but she doesn’t look upset. “The same as it was before her operation, just like we talked about when we brought her home from the hospital.”
“No more kissing and sleeping in her bed?”
“No, and she knows that. Are you upset with me for being there for her like that?” Sam shakes her head and pulls back some to lean back on her hands and looks at the sky. “No. I keep thinking I should be, but I’m not. I know I used to hate her, but I actually love Symone now. I was really scared when you shot out of bed to check on her and we realized something really was wrong. I can’t imagine what it would feel like to go through something like that without someone who loves me by my side. I understand why you bent the boundaries of the relationship slightly before we had to leave. I just want to make sure those boundaries have been straightened out again.”
She looks at me with a blank expression, holding my eyes with her beautiful sage green eyes. I nod once and run my fingers through her bright golden blonde hair.
“Yes, the boundaries were restored before we left home. In all of the commotion before leaving and then the crazy schedules this week, I don’t think I actually thanked all of you for being ok with that. I hope you know I didn’t do that because I was desiring her or something. It’s not like I took advantage of a bad situation to bend the rules so I could be with her like that.”
“We know that. I’m not worried about you. I just hope Symone can easily jump back down a peg and not revert to her old ways to try to have you that way again. You’ve never kissed her like that unless it was for work. For three days, she had you to hold her and kiss her and love on her – not sexually, but in an even more meaningful way. I know you love Symone and would do anything for her, but now she knows that too. Is she strong enough to do this sexy love affair dance show you guys want to create?”
“I guess we’ll find out when we go home. Does this concern get me out of having to take pole dance classes with Symone?” Sam and Madison laugh and tickle my sides. “Definitely, not! I’ll put a shock-collar on that girl while she’s training you before I let you out of that.”
“A shock-collar? That sounds kinky.” Sam laughs, but looks at my neck with a naughty grin. “Don’t tempt me.”
“Do they make them for humans?” Sam inhales deeply and bites her bottom lip for a moment. “You would wear that?”
“Would that turn you on?” Sam’s delicate smooth milky white cheeks flush pink and she leans into me, placing a hand on the inside of my thigh. “Maybe, but only if you like it. I’ve never touched your neck with that electrical-stimulus wand we have. Maybe we should try that first.”
“Ok. We’ll also have to run it by Shannon first. She gets nervous with the neck.” Sam smiles and kisses my lips. “Of course, all of our wives have to be ok with it.”
“I’m not sure I’d be ok with you wearing a collar. After that stuff with Shane and her girlfriend, they kind of disgust me.”
“That’s fine, Maddi, we don’t have to try it.” Madison looks up at Sam with a small smile and leans over my lap to give her a kiss. “I’m sorry. I just think it’s too degrading and I could never do that to Kayla or any of you.”
“Don’t be sorry. It can be, depending on the person’s attitude when using it. I like how Kayla goes wild and kind of savage when we slap her and shock her while we’re having sex. It brings out an animal side of her that is so fucking sexy.”
My face spreads into a huge goofy smile and Madison laughs and tickles my side.
“That’s true. It is very sexy when you two go completely savage. Let me think about it.”
“Ok, but no pressure, baby. It’s really not a big deal. It could be fun, but it’s not a loss if we don’t ever try it. Have you heard from Shane lately?”
“No, I haven’t heard from her in about two months. I’ve sent her texts and I’ve tried calling her, but she doesn’t respond. She broke up with Vic after Halloween, and since then, she’s been really distant. I don’t know what’s going on, but it kind of concerns me.”
“Do you think Vic hit her again?” I look up at the sky with sadness filling my chest. “I don’t know. She didn’t give me details on why they broke up and she declined on my invitation to hang out so she could talk. I haven’t seen her in so long because my schedule is just nuts, so maybe she decided it’s not worth trying to stay friends.”
“Why don’t you try again when we get home? Invite her to the house or go out to lunch or something.”
“I guess. We should have the others over before spring break. I haven’t seen them in months. Well, except for brief moments when they come to work on filling boxes with you guys in the barn.”
“Yeah, we should have a nice dinner with them. Are you ready to go back inside? I’m getting really hungry.”
I climb down the ladder first so I can hold it steady for Madison and Sam. After putting the ladder away and locking the shed, I take their hands and we go back inside. We walk in the back door and find my parents kissing in the kitchen. They slowly pull apart and look over at us with small happy grins.
“Good morning, girls. I’m just getting ready to make some tea and breakfast.”
“Hey.” Joey walks in and stands in front of me. “Can I talk to you?”
“Sure, where do you want to talk?”
“In the woods.” I raise my eyebrows in surprise, but his face shows he’s serious. “Ok, let me get some shoes on.”
Joey and I walk out to the woods and when we’re about thirty yards in, he stops and looks up at me with a grin.
“I want to give Bella a promise ring when we go to Orlando.” I nervously rub the back of my neck and sit down on a fallen tree, with Joey following and sitting close to me. “Do you know what that means?”
“I think so. I love her and she loves me. One day, I want something like what Mom and Dad have. But I want her to know I’m serious and I want her to be serious. Not like how Awenasa made you wait for so long and you dated other girls because you didn’t know she was serious. I don’t want to date other girls and I don’t want Bella to love any other boys.”
“You’re the same age I was when I gave Awenasa her promise ring. Are you doing this because you want to follow in my footsteps, or because you really feel in your heart and spirit that Bella is the one?”
“She’s the one. I just know it. I know I’m a kid, but I just feel something different with her. Didn’t you just know it? Isn’t that why you gave Awenasa the ring?”
“It is. I felt complete when I was with Awenasa.”
“That’s how I feel when I talk to Bella and see her. Was it hard going so long without seeing Awenasa after you knew she was the one?”
“It was very hard and painful, especially after I gave her the ring. I never wanted to leave her side.”
“Do you think it’s fair to Bella to ask her to wait for me?”
“Right now, you’re both kids. You have at least five to six years before you start to have a real interest in dating. That’s when the question of whether or not you can wait for each other will really mean something.”
“Why, what happens when we’re teenagers?” I look at him confused for a moment, but he’s just looking at me waiting. “Your body changes.” He blushes as he looks down at the ground and kicks at a stick. “You mean, sex? I learned about tha
t in school and Dad talked to me about it. He said it’s harder for boys than girls because our hormones or chemicals or something get out of control. He said girls have better brains for controlling that stuff. But he said just because we’re weaker doesn’t excuse us if we mess up. We just have to try harder to be as strong as girls.”
I laugh a little and ruffle his hair. He lays his head on my arm and takes my hand in his.
“Girls mess up too, buddy.”
“I’m scared. What if I ask her to wait for me, but I mess up? What if I can’t wait? Is that why you dated Sam, you couldn’t wait or control your hormones?”
“It was complicated. Even though we made promises and talked about our dreams of being together, I didn’t know for sure that Awenasa was really serious. When we were at that age, like fifteen or sixteen, if she had kissed me, then I would have known she was serious and I would have waited for her. My life would likely be very different and much simpler than it is now, though.”
“So, if I give Bella a promise ring, I need to kiss her when we’re old enough to do that stuff? Then she’ll know I’m serious and we’ll be able to wait and not want to be with other people?”
“Possibly. There’s no guarantee you’ll end up together, even if you give her a promise ring. You’re both still so young and you’ll continue to grow and change as individuals. You may be very different people by the time you’re an adult and can do something about the promises to be together. You both may meet other people you like better.”
“So, I shouldn’t give her a promise ring?”
“I know the promise ring represents the future, but try not to think about that right now. What does your heart feel right now?”
“I feel like Bella is my best friend. She is my favorite thought. I like thinking about her and talking to her, more than anyone else. I like to hold her hand, but I don’t like when other girls try to hold my hand. Her laugh and smile are my favorite.”
“I think you should give her the promise ring, but you both have to understand that anything in life is possible. Things may change in the future, and you have to be fair to your hearts to allow that change to happen if things don’t work out the way you plan. Do you understand?”
“I think so. If she meets someone else, or I meet someone else, we have to talk about it.” I smile and wrap an arm around his shoulders. “So, do you have the ring yet?” He looks up with a small smile and shakes his head. “No, I needed your advice first. Do you have time to take me shopping before you leave today?”
“Yeah, we can do that. Let’s go eat breakfast and get ready for the day.”
I’m so proud of my little brother. When we first met Bella at the premiere of the TV ballroom dance competition, she was still going through treatments for acute leukemia. Kids can be really mean and Bella was not immune to that, even though she has such a sweet fun-loving personality. When she lost her hair, most of her friends abandoned her, and many of the kids teased her. Joey never once looked at her as a sickly cancer patient. He looked at her as a complete human being that he has come to love.
The best gift that her mom and the rest of us received just before Christmas is finding out that Bella is finally cancer free after two years of treatments. Her light brown hair is growing back in, so she has a cute pixie style now, and her body is filling out a little more, so she doesn’t look as frail and weak anymore.
I’m really glad that Bella is in good health now and will be able to fully enjoy the trip to Disney World with us. We decided to do our first large convention center choreography camp in Orlando, Florida, so we can also have a nice vacation. For Christmas, we surprised the family and Bella and her mom, Karen, with tickets to join us. We have rooms in a beautiful fully inclusive Disney resort, VIP passes for all of the parks, and tickets for some special shows.
After eating breakfast with my family, and while Joey and Talia are getting ready for the day, I tell my parents and wives about my conversation with Joey. My parents look a little concerned, but also proud.
“Do you think Karen will be able to handle this? I don’t want her to freak out and Joey ends up getting hurt.” My mom smiles and takes my hand in hers. “I talk to Karen often because of how close Joey and Bella are. I think she will be nervous, but she will also be very happy. We’ve actually talked about this as a possibility. Joey looks up to you and everyone can see that. He may have genuine love for Bella, but he wouldn’t have thought to give her a promise ring if you hadn’t given one to Awenasa when you were his age.”
“Does it ever make you nervous that he looks up to me so much?” My parents laugh a little and shake their heads. “No, angel. We are so very proud of you every single day.”
“You’re not ready yet?”
I look behind myself to see Joey standing next to the kitchen counter with his hands on his hips. He’s dressed in a nice pair of dark blue jeans and a nice plaid button up collar shirt. He normally just wears tee shirts, unless he has a nice function to go to, or we have company over.
“I’ll be quick. Are we going out alone or can the family come so we can get lunch afterwards?” He puckers his lips in thought and scratches the back of his head. “Ok, we can all go. But Talia better not make fun of me.” I laugh a little and ruffle his hair as I walk past him. “That’s just what big sisters do. Sara makes fun of me all the time.”
Chapter Twelve
“Hey, puppy. What are you doing?”
Awenasa is leaning against the doorframe of the nursery giving me a loving happy smile. I pat the window bench, beckoning her to join me. Her closed lip smile spreads into a beautiful bright smile and she comes to sit next to me. I take her hand in mine and firmly kiss the top.
“I just got off the phone with the sperm bank. The donor checks out and they’ve begun the collection process. I, uh, was wondering, how do you want to do it? I mean, how do you want me to plant the seeds?”
“I’ve been researching it, and most people go with the sterile syringe method, but there’s also a flexible cup that can be inserted that basically just dumps it inside me. I also found a prosthetic penis that has a tube with a small bulb that you gently squeeze the semen into me, kind of like a turkey baster.”
“Is that something you’re comfortable with trying? You’ve never had a dildo in you before.”
“I’d like to try the cup first. We’re supposed to inseminate twice during my peek ovulation period, so the first time we try to get pregnant, I want to use the cup. If that doesn’t work, we’ll try the next month with the prosthetic or syringe.”
“I keep forgetting that this may be a drawn-out process. Is there anything I can do to help increase the odds?”
“The only thing we can do is track my cycle and try to plant the seeds at the right time. I’ve been tracking my cycle for months with a fertility app that helps to estimate when my egg has been released. But I found out there are some strips that we can use that will also help with narrowing it down more. They’re kind of like pH strips, but for hormones. If we’re unsuccessful, we’ll have to go for a consultation with a fertility doctor for help.”
“I’m sorry I haven’t been able to help with the research. I should have been looking at all of this with you.” Awenasa grabs my chin, lifting my head and turning my face to look at her. “Kayla, you’ve been working very hard and have had a ton of responsibility on you for the past few months. I know you really want a child, but your time right now is very limited. Since I have more time, I can do the research for us. A lot of the research is mainly just getting to know my own body better.”
“Well, can I order the supplies with you?” She smiles and pulls me into a kiss. As she pulls away, she caresses my cheek and runs her hand through my hair. “Yes, we’ll order the supplies as a family.”
“Are you scared at all?”
“A little bit, but I’m mostly excited. I’m just concerned about the morning sickness and other possible changes my body could go through. Some women have easy pregnancies witho
ut too much discomfort, and some women have a horrible time with sickness, diabetes, and heart problems. My mom had morning sickness for the first month and back pain for the last few months, but was ok otherwise. If I can have a pregnancy like that, I’ll count that as an easy pregnancy.”
“I want to be here with you for your first month and last month. We need to make sure we don’t schedule anything for those time frames. I wish I could be here with you for the entire pregnancy to pamper you and take care of you.” Awenasa smiles and kisses my lips. “You’re already scheduled for several big jobs this year, and may have a second movie to make early next year, but we’ll do our best to plan for you to be here for those two specific months. It’s not like you won’t be here at all for it, and I won’t be alone. Our wives will be here to help me through the entire pregnancy. I really want you here when I give birth though.”
I smile and lay my head on her shoulder. She runs her fingers through my hair and kisses the top of my head.
“I love you so much. I’m really happy we’ll be doing this soon. I’ve been having a lot of dreams lately about our children. I dream about all of us snuggling in bed with an infant cradled in the center of us. I’ve had a few dreams of big family gatherings with our toddlers dressed in dance regalia dancing around the fire with us. I even had one with you holding a baby in your arms, with Shannon sitting next to you with a pregnant belly.”
“I’ve been having dreams like that for years, but they have become more frequent since we’ve started the steps to have a baby. They’re wonderful dreams.”
“What totem do you think our first baby will have?” Awenasa laughs a little and kisses my head, before wrapping her arms around me, holding me against her chest. “I don’t know, puppy. It’s going to be wonderful watching our children grow up and learn who they are and the path they are meant to follow.”