As they swung forlornly, none of them could possibly have guessed how things were about to change.
On Monday morning Katie was the first one at The Café. She’d hardly been able to sleep all night. The only few minutes she’d had, she’d dreamt she was running down lots of dark corridors. She’d opened a door and found herself in a classroom. Dan was taking a lesson and there was a diagram on the blackboard which somehow she’d known was of hepatitis in rabbits. She’d backed away before he’d been able to speak, turned round and found herself under the sea.
She woke to the sound of rain. She looked over to her clock and saw how early it was. Then she remembered what today meant. Today was the first day with the new owners. Today was the first day of the rest of her life. Today she would be fired.
She rolled over. And then, oh joy, she was unable to move. She was, quite unexpectedly, more comfortable than she had ever been in her life. She focused on it so as not to forget the feeling. Yes, her body had chanced upon a position that made all other positions a nonsense. Her limbs felt light with the luxury of it. The spaces between them were perfection. There was probably an equation for it. Every feather in her duvet had found its optimum position, and as for her pillow, it was a cloud. Her head seemed to be cushioned in cotton wool. All thoughts were clear here. All emotions profound. Was this what heaven felt like? Why, she thought, had this not happened ten hours ago? Why had she spent an entire night trying to get this comfortable? Why had she not tried this position? It was hardly complicated. Her body almost hummed with happiness. She was the closest she’d ever come to purring. It felt as if time had stood still.
Unfortunately it hadn’t and when she next looked at her clock she almost jumped out of her blissed-out skin. She had ten minutes to get to work and it took fifteen minutes to walk it, let alone shower and dress. She was going to be late.
“Excellent,” greeted Sukie, already at the coffee maker when she arrived. “Start as you mean to go on.”
“I overslept.”
“You’re fired.”
“You’re ugly.”
When she arrived at Sukie’s side, they exchanged glances.
“How nervous are you?” asked Katie.
Sukie turned her hands upward. “My palms are sweating.”
Katie closed her eyes. “I couldn’t sleep.”
The café door opened and they both jumped. Hugh beamed at them.
“Hello!”
As Katie made him his usual, she and Sukie tried to remember what their new boss looked like.
“He had blond hair,” said Katie. “I remember thinking he might be an actor. I think he was good-looking, but sort of like a sad horse.”
“Oh God,” prayed Sukie. “Please don’t let me fancy him.”
“No sense of humor.”
“I always like men with no sense of humor. Much more of a challenge.”
The door opened again and they jumped. It was another commuter.
“We’re too nervous today,” greeted Katie. “You’ll have to make your own coffee.”
“Double espresso please,” said the commuter, approaching the counter.
“Our lives are about to be ruined and all you can think of is coffee.”
“Why, what’s up?” asked the commuter. “Not that I care, I’m just being polite to get my coffee.”
“Our new boss is coming today and he’s a gormless twat.”
“With no sense of humor,” said Sukie.
“Who thinks I’m obnoxious!” cried Katie.
“No!” cried the commuter.
“Yes!” cried Katie.
“Where could he have got that idea from?” asked the commuter.
“Oh,” came a new voice behind them. “Just from watching her.”
Katie froze. Sukie froze. Even the commuter froze. He looked past them both at the man standing behind them and his mouth twitched into a nervy smile.
“Hello,” he said. “I-I just wanted coffee. You must be the new boss.”
“That’s right,” came the voice. “Gormless twat to you.”
Katie closed her eyes.
“With no sense of humor,” continued the voice.
“Oh shit,” muttered Sukie, turning round.
“Hello,” grinned Paul Brown happily. “I’m Paul.” He held up some keys. “I let myself in through the back.”
“I didn’t know you could open that door,” said Katie.
“I didn’t know there was a door,” said Sukie.
“It’s behind the Busted calendar,” said Katie, trying a smile. “Hello,” she said.
“How’s it going?” asked their new boss.
“Oh, you know,” answered Katie.
“Not really,” he said. “I’m new to all this.”
“Oh,” said Katie.
“You look absolutely terrified,” he said quietly.
“I am.”
“Why? I’m the one who doesn’t know what I’m doing.”
She blinked. “Yes but I’m the one who was rude to you.”
“I know,” he laughed. “Priceless. Can’t wait for you to meet—”
“Double espresso please!” repeated the commuter. “I hate to get in the way of a lovely reunion, but I have a train to catch.”
“All right!” shouted Katie, sweeping back to the commuter. “Keep your wig on.”
She made the commuter his coffee while, to her astonishment, Paul chuckled and repeated, “Priceless.” The commuter looked at him. “I trust the first thing you’ll do is sack this one,” he said.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” said Paul.
“It’s like being at home,” muttered the commuter. “Except at least the wife cooks for me.”
“Maybe she could make you coffee in the morning too.” Katie slammed his drink on the counter. “Keep you out of my hair.”
“What and miss this delightful exchange every day?” He picked up his coffee, grinning happily. “It’s what keeps me going.”
“Talking of which,” Katie looked at her watch, “shouldn’t you be?”
“Don’t worry,” he said, paying Sukie. “I’m on my way.” He looked at Paul and gave him a cheery wink. “Best of luck mate. You’ll bloody need it.”
As the commuter queues continued throughout the morning, Paul introduced himself to all the staff. At nine-thirty, as the last of the queues died down, he asked them all to convene. As he did so, a girl of tender age, glowing skin and splendid breasts arrived. She beamed happily at everyone.
“Coffee?” asked Sukie.
“Ooh,” she squealed. “Don’t mind if I do.”
“Enjoy it,” said Paul. “It’ll be your last one on the house.”
“Oh hi, Uncle.”
The staff looked at him.
“Yes,” he told them, “you’re looking at the newest addition—another waitress.” He walked out to the front of the café where his niece stood and put his arm round her. “Everyone. I want you to meet my eldest niece Patsy.” He took in their expressions. “My brother’s fifteen years older than me,” he explained.
“Hello,” said Matt.
Patsy gave them all a big smile.
“Hiya,” she said and gave a little wave.
“The daughter I never had,” grinned Paul. Patsy giggled. “Thanks,” he added, “to contraception.” She giggled again, before stopping suddenly.
Within half an hour, they all discovered that Patsy was living proof that aesthetics and function rarely mix.
“Oh,” she said sadly, staring at toast she’d just burned. “How did I do that?”
Katie shook her head, tutting. “It’s a puzzler and no mistake. Sukie? Any ideas?”
“I can only assume you put it in for too long,” said Sukie.
“Yes, but how?” frowned Patsy.
Sukie and Katie exchanged glances. “I think it’s going to be a long day,” muttered Katie.
Paul had shut the café and asked everyone to wait in the front, showing Patsy the ropes, while he had a
one-to-one with them in turn in the kitchen. He had started half an hour ago with the chef. It didn’t take them long to work out the genius behind employing Patsy. With her here, they couldn’t discuss Paul. Or so he thought. Katie had other ideas.
“So,” she started. “What’s your uncle like?”
“Which Uncle? I’ve got three.”
“The one talking to the chef,” said Matt.
“Oh he’s not the chef any more.” She gasped and clasped her hand to her mouth. “I wasn’t meant to say that.”
“He’s sacking the chef?” they all asked.
“I didn’t tell you,” rushed Patsy.
“You’re right,” said Katie. “He’ll never guess how we know.”
Just then Paul arrived. They all stared at him in silence.
“Right,” he said quietly. “Matt. You’re next mate.”
They all watched, bug-eyed as Matt followed Paul into the kitchen.
Sukie and Katie stared at each other.
“So,” said Patsy from the other side of the counter. “How do you do this toaster again?”
Five minutes later, Paul was back.
“Sukie.”
“Yes?”
He raised his eyebrows. “Kitchen please.”
They exchanged glances and Sukie followed him down.
“So,” said Patsy again. “Never turn it higher than two?”
Katie could only nod. He was clever, this Paul. He’d separated her and Sukie and left her with Patsy. After what felt like a year, she heard Paul’s footsteps approach. She turned to him and he gave her a tight smile.
“After you,” he said, opening the door for her.
“Shall I wait here?” asked Patsy.
“Yes, I’ll be back in a moment.”
Katie opened the kitchen door with trepidation. There sat Matt and Sukie on the counter. There was a moment before Paul followed her in, but their expressions gave nothing away.
“Right,” sighed Paul. “This is all a lot more harrowing than I thought.” He checked his watch. “My partner should be here right now, but he’s been delayed picking up the new chef.”
Katie gasped. The others gave her grave expressions.
“That’s right,” said Paul. “I’m afraid there were a few things we wanted to change and the cooking was one of them. The other one was you, Katie.”
She nodded.
“I had hoped I wouldn’t be alone to do this, but so be it,” said Paul. “Katie—”
“I can be nicer.”
There was an awkward pause.
“Pardon?”
“I can be nicer. It won’t be easy, but I can try. Please.”
She glanced at Sukie for help, but Sukie was shaking her head.
“God no,” said Paul. “We don’t want you being nice, this place would lose all its charm. No, we’d like to make you manager.”
Katie heard the words, but didn’t get the meaning. She heard Sukie breathe in sharply and felt herself being hugged by Matt. As Paul continued, she grew overwhelmed with emotion.
“We have great new plans for this place.” He was now pacing the kitchen, slaloming round bags and ovens. “We’ve hired a new chef—he’s fantastic and will be here any minute. A new menu. Totally new design, new outfits and new look.” He turned to them suddenly. “Porter’s Green is up and coming,” he declared, “and this place is gonna be up and coming with it.” Just when Katie thought he was going to break into a rendition of Oklahoma, he satisfied himself with a beam. He opened his arms to his new team, and Katie, drawing on all her reserves of self-control, managed not to run into them sobbing with joy. She could do that later. “We have every faith in you lot.” Paul went on. “You coped with Alec—we think you can cope with everything. Any ideas you have will be gratefully received. You’re the experts—we have a lot to learn from you.”
“I have lots of ideas,” rushed Katie. “For recipes and menu design and waitress outfits and children’s meals. And, and…” She stopped and looked round at everyone. They were looking back at her. She decided not to suggest organizing a parade and designing a float for it. They could do that next year.
She turned back to Paul. “You know,” she shrugged with a smile. “Just some ideas.” She’d have to remember not to act as if her inner core had just been pumped full of light and air. It might annoy the others.
“Good. We’re going to change the menu completely, and the name of the place.”
“What’s it going to be called?” asked Sukie.
“Crichton Brown’s. That’s our surnames, my partner and me, and it’s all going to be re-painted coffee and cream. Soothing yet trendy, fresh yet warm, smart yet casual. The menu will have organic everything, rice milk, soya milk, you-name-it milk, wholemeal, unrefined flour in the pastry and quinoa in the salads.”
“What?” asked Matt.
“Salads,” said Katie.
“What will we give people who want stuff that tastes nice?” asked Sukie.
“I think it’s brilliant!” said Katie excitedly, trying not to bounce.
“And here’s the best part,” said Paul, “you’ve all got two weeks’ paid leave—yes, paid—while we totally refurbish.”
There was a pause.
“Don’t all cheer at once.”
“But what will the commuters do during those two weeks?” asked Katie.
He shrugged. “I’m sure they can cope for a fortnight.”
“No no no!” said Katie. “They might cope for one week. For two weeks they’ll settle into a new routine and never come back.”
Sukie nodded. “And then Crichton Brown’s would be a bit trendy yet empty.”
“How about we just do coffee,” suggested Katie quickly, “while the rest of the place is being done up? All you’d need is the coffee machine, milk, coffee, paper cups, and one of us, of course, to make the coffees and serve the regulars. I’ll do it. Then I can work with you on the new menu ideas at the same time.”
“Right,” said Sukie. “I’m glad that’s all been decided then. Well done Paul. You’re doing a cracking job.”
Paul swallowed. His mobile rang. He turned away and whispered frantically into it, the shirt on his back a darker color due to sweat. All Katie heard was “already a fucking coup” before he rang off. He turned back round and gave them another smile.
“That was my partner and the new chef. They’re just parking. Traffic’s been lousy apparently.”
“It always is this time of day,” said Sukie.
“Right.”
They heard a high-pitched voice from the café.
“I think the toaster’s broken!”
“Ah,” said Paul. “Patsy. Who’d like to bring her in?”
“I’ll go,” said Matt, moving faster than Katie and Sukie had ever seen him move.
“So,” said Paul. “Everybody happy?”
“Yeah,” said Sukie. “I think it’s brilliant, Paul. And on behalf of all the staff, I’d like to say how much we’re looking forward to working with you.”
“Thank you, Su—”
“I feel I can talk on behalf of everyone,” continued Sukie, her smile rigid, “because, as you may know, I’m the longest serving member of staff here.” Paul nodded slowly. “By quite a long way I think,” she went on, turning to Katie. “How long had I been here when you came to do part-time shifts?” she asked. “You remember, when I had to show you how to use the coffee machine?”
Katie stared at her friend. It was only the pain in Sukie’s eyes that stopped her from asking what the bollocking hell she was playing at. “Er,” she spoke softly. “I’m not sure.” She turned to Paul and gave him a resigned nod. “It was quite a considerable while, I think.”
Sukie nodded. “Mm. It was two years actually.”
There was a pause and Paul started visibly sweating. He licked his lips, swallowed hard and turned to Sukie. “You’re an actress, right?”
“Hmm,” allowed Sukie, crossing her arms.
“Wel
l,” said Paul. “After careful consideration and of course, Alec’s opinion taken into account, we finally decided that we couldn’t possibly have a manager who might have to go on tour suddenly. After I’ve finished my sabbatical from my job, I’m going back to work full-time and my partner has absolutely no restaurant experience, so we needed a manager who was one hundred percent committed to this job. No other commitments at all. No other priorities. No other career goals. And, if I’m honest, for a while, no other interests at all. Being manager is going to be a hugely responsible, largely thankless job at first, with longer hours and only a little more pay.”
Paul stared intently at Sukie, while beside them Katie felt her inner core slowly shrivel up and topple over. She stayed motionless, hoping the others might not have noticed the subtle implication that her promotion was actually a public declaration of failure. That might have been embarrassing.
Sukie nodded, convinced. “I didn’t mean to be funny or anything,” she explained kindly. “I think Katie will be absolutely fantastic. But you know, I just wanted to know.”
Paul smiled uncertainly, wiping his forehead with a handkerchief. “Blimey, I hadn’t realized it would be this hard,” he joked with his new staff.
“Well, what did you expect?” Sukie asked with a big smile. “You come here with your ‘smart yet trendy; bijou yet bollocks’ and expect us to just take it.”
Suddenly Paul walked to the kitchen door, muttering about Patsy. He called and was answered by the sound of giggling. Patsy was holding a mug of coffee as she came in with Matt.
“I was just showing her how to fix the toaster,” Matt explained. “And I made her a coffee.”
“Ooh! That would be lovely,” said Sukie. “Mine’s an espresso.”
They heard the strangled sound of the café door opening.
“Did someone just kill a cat?” asked Sukie. Everyone laughed and Katie managed a smile.
“Aha!” cried Paul almost ecstatically. “That’ll be my partner in crime.”
They waited, Sukie, Katie and Matt all watching Patsy sip her coffee.
“Ooh,” she enthused, licking her lips. “It’s lovely coffee.”
“Yeah,” said Paul thinly. “We’ll be changing it.”
Ignoring their response to this, his face lit up at the sight of a tall, broad blond Adonis who had appeared in the kitchen doorway. All eyes left Patsy.
The Waitress Page 13