by Ann Lister
“What time did you say the charter service can fly us back to New York?” she asked.
Ben stepped in front of her. His head tipped in confusion, shock registered on his face. The weight of her question hit him hard in the chest.
“You still want to leave?” he asked.
“I have to go, Ben.”
His face grimaced as if she had slapped him.
“Why, Sydney? Why do you have to go?”
“Because I live in New York,” she said quietly.
This was going to be more difficult than she realized. She wanted to hear him ask her to stay, maybe suggest she move-in with him, or even better…propose.
Ben turned away from Sydney and drifted toward the deck. If Sydney didn't want to be with him, he certainly wasn't going to beg her. He stood beside Jenna, slid his hand beneath his daughter's chin and bent to kiss the top of her head.
He was so upset, he could barely draw a breath. The thought of Sydney leaving him again was painful enough, but this time she'd be taking his daughter away with her. It was far more than he could stomach. Without saying anything, he walked to the steps that led to the beach.
“Ben?” Sydney called to him.
“I need a minute, Syd,” he said, without looking at her. He walked down the stairs and across the beach and stood at the waters edge. He stayed there for several minutes, blankly staring at the horizon. He didn't know what to do or what to say. Sydney's mind had been made up and it seemed pointless to continue the conversation.
He returned to the house and called the charter service. He booked a plane for Sydney, then spent the remaining two hours alone with Jenna. He was too distraught to even look at Sydney and the right words to say escaped him. The pain he felt deep in his chest made him feel like he was dying.
The limousine service picked them up at Ben's house and he rode with them to the airport. He held Jenna on his lap, occasionally kissing her, while he read a series of books aloud, keeping the child entertained.
It killed Sydney to see Ben struggling with this, when to her the solution seemed so simple. Her heart ached at the thought he may not be thinking in terms of a permanent commitment and she couldn't spend another night in his bed without one.
They were almost to the airport when Ben finally spoke to Sydney. Even when he did, he barely made eye contact with her.
“At some point we need to discuss visitation,” he said softly.
“Ben, you can come visit us in New York anytime you want…or we can come back here - if that works better for you.”
“Bullshit!” he muttered under his breath.
“Ben! Watch your language.”
The limousine pulled into the private gated area of the airport that serviced the charter flights and came to a stop a few yards from the airplane. Ben walked across the tarmac carrying Jenna in his arms. They went up the stairs and onto the plane with Sydney close behind. Ben selected a seat and secured Jenna into it. He turned to leave the plane and felt Sydney touch his shoulder. He faced her with reluctance, praying he'd be able to control his emotions and not say something he'd regret.
“We'll see you soon,” she stated, but the words came out of her mouth sounding more like a question. She ached to be pulled against him, but he didn't move toward her. He stood frozen, pain creasing his face, tension tightening his jaw.
“Will you?” he asked.
Sydney tipped her head and forced a smile. “I hope so.”
Ben stepped toward Jenna again and kissed her on the cheek. “Daddy loves you,” he whispered, then he exited the plane and returned to the limousine. He asked the driver to wait until Sydney's plane taxied to the runway. Seeing her plane leave was excruciatingly real for him. It felt too final and he hated it.
He sat alone in a back corner of the limousine on the way back to his house. The darkness inside the car hiding the emotion that was rolling in waves through him. He couldn't understand why Sydney didn't want to be with him. They were perfect together, in every way, and now they shared a child. Her behavior didn't make sense to him. The pain of losing Sydney the first time all but killed him, but this time it would be even worse because it felt like he was losing Jenna, too. For one day, he had a family and, in the blink of an eye, they were gone.
When the limousine dropped him back at his house, he didn't even bother to go inside. He sat in a chair on the deck and watched the sky turn from daylight to dusk. He felt empty and the one person that had ever made him feel full was in New York City.
He saw only one way to resolve their situation, but he had no way of knowing if Sydney would see his solution as the answer. For all he knew, she'd think his suggestion offered nothing more than another problem. He knew one thing for certain: he did not want to live without Sydney or Jenna in his life. It was time to toss it all out on the table and see what happened.
Ben pulled his cell phone from his pocket and called the charter flight company, this time he booked himself a flight to New York City. With any luck, he'd be at Sydney's apartment before she went to sleep.
Ben frantically knocked at Sydney's door. He felt desperate to see her and paced the hall while he waited for her to answer the door. Finally the door swung open and Sydney stood before him, wearing nothing but a pair of boxer shorts and a tight white t-shirt.
“I was expecting Maddy,” she said. “What are you doing here?”
She stepped aside and let him enter, then saw the exasperated look on his face and a feeling of doom crept into her.
“What's wrong, Ben? Has something happened?” she asked.
Ben cupped her face with his hands and held her in place. “We need to talk. Where's Jenna?”
“It's late, she's sleeping.”
She brought him into the living room, thinking he'd sit and start talking, but he didn't.
“Ben, you're scaring me. What's going on with you?”
He reached for Sydney's hand and tugged her down the hall toward her bedroom.
“Talk to me,” she said.
He flopped across the end of her bed, his feet still resting on the floor. His forearm crossed his face. Sydney sat beside him and waited for him to speak.
“I watched your plane leave today,” he finally said. “And, I didn't like it. The pain I felt was like death. I don't ever want to feel that again.”
Sydney's gaze fell to her lap. Tears quickly formed in her eyes. “I didn't like it either, Ben. I cried all the way home.”
Ben rubbed at his eyes and sighed loudly.
“Do you really love me, Sydney?”
She moved up beside him and laid down, setting her head on his shoulder. “Very much.”
His arm cradled her head. “Then, I can't live like this - visiting each other. It won't work and I'm not looking for a part-time girlfriend.”
“Then what do you want, Ben?”
She placed her hand on his chest and felt it rise slowly, as he drew in a long breath. She could feel his heart pounding beneath her fingers.
“Do you remember the last few days of our vacation at my house?” he asked.
“I remember everything,” she replied.
“You kept asking why I seemed so distracted, but I never told you what was on my mind.”
“I assumed it was work.”
“I came very close to asking you to marry me, then decided to wait until the tour ended. But you left me before I had the chance to ask.”
He rolled his head to her.
“If I had asked you then, Syd, what would your answer have been?”
Sydney smiled and touched the hair on his chin. “I would have said yes.”
“Really? With no hesitation?”
“I've known what I wanted for a long time, Ben.”
He moved against her and kissed her mouth. “What about now?”
“That depends,” she said. “Are you proposing or is this purely hypothetical?”
“I'm asking, Sydney,” he said. “Will you marry me?”
She tipped her he
ad and brushed her lips against his. “I had given up thinking I'd ever hear you say the words,” she said.
“You've been waiting for me to ask?”
“I was hopeful.”
A loud series of knocks rattled Sydney's front door.
“That's got to be Maddy,” she said and slid off the bed. “She left her wallet here earlier.”
Ben propped himself up on his elbows and watched her run from the room and smiled.
“Is that a yes or a no?” he asked, and flopped back onto the bed.
Ben heard Sydney open the door then a muffled scream, followed by a loud crash. He bolted from the bed and ran down the hall and stopped short when he saw a man hovering over Sydney, wrestling her against the floor.
Ben lunged for the man and grabbed him by the neck and jerked. The man spun around and landed a punch against Ben's jaw. Ben staggered backward and tripped over the leg of a chair and slammed into a wooden bookcase, hitting his head. His eyes briefly connected with the man and recognition tore through his brain.
“Billy Iris,” Ben said, and slumped to the floor unconscious.
Ben woke slowly, his head throbbing and his vision blurred. He reached for his head and realized he was restrained. His hands and legs were bound to a chair sitting just beyond the foot of Sydney's bed. Duct tape covered his mouth.
“How nice of you to join us,” Billy said to Ben. “I was afraid you were going to miss the party.”
Billy tightened the scarf securing Sydney's hands to the headboard of her bed and double checked the tension on the fabric attaching her ankles to opposite foot posts. Ben heard her cry out in pain, then the slap of Billy's hand as it made contact with her face. Ben tried to stand up with the chair attached to him and fell back against the wall. He bumped against a television set positioned on a pedestal table and sent it to the floor with a smashing sound. In the next room, Jenna began to cry for her mother.
“That fucking kid is giving me a headache!” Billy screamed.
Billy unbuckled his belt and pulled it through the loops. It made a cracking sound like a whip and Sydney began to whimper. Ben screamed behind the duct tape. His efforts made little noise and only managed to make his head hurt more. Billy looked at him and laughed.
“Not so tough now, are you, Benny-boy,” Billy said.
Billy pulled at Sydney's shorts and stopped. “Looks like I'm going to need a knife for this,” he said, and stomped from the room.
Ben's eyes darted to Sydney. She was conscious but bruised. The duct tape over her mouth prevented her from speaking. Their eyes met and held. Ben could hear her anguished sobs. He would stop Billy if it was the last thing he did.
Billy returned to the bedroom, yelling at Jenna as he walked past her room. The child silenced briefly, but started wailing again. He held a steak knife in his hand. The room light reflected off the blade and made it appear larger than it was.
“Now we're going have some fun,” Billy said.
He walked to the bed and straddled Sydney's hips on the mattress. She thrashed in her restraints below him and Billy laughed at her efforts. He put the knife horizontally in his mouth, bit on the blade, and bent over her. He rubbed himself against her for a moment, then sat back on her thighs.
He took the knife from his mouth and dragged the metal tip over her hip and onto her bare thigh.
“Kind of hard to play when you're wearing all these clothes,” he said.
He traced patterns with the blade on her skin, leaving thin red lines but not drawing blood. Tears spilled from Sydney's eyes and again she fought with the ties holding her hostage. Billy used the knife to toy with the fabric of her shorts, then fiercely cut through it, exposing her to him. Sydney began fighting with force.
Ben could hear Sydney's muted screams, over and over, her desperate voice rang in his head. He jerked relentlessly against the pieces of cord tied at his wrists and ankles, oblivious to the pain it was causing. He rocked his chair, banging the wooden legs on the floor, inching closer to the bed. He saw Billy glide the knife blade up the front of Sydney's t-shirt, slicing through the shirt and revealing her breasts.
“Pay attention, Benny-boy,” Billy said. “I want you to watch how your girlfriend really likes to get fucked.”
Billy stabbed the knife blade into the mattress and unzipped his pants. Sydney jerked and tugged until she managed to free an arm. Her hand went to Billy's face, fingernails poised to draw blood. Billy grabbed the knife and pressed it to her throat. A small droplet of blood appeared on her skin beneath the blade.
“You may want to rethink scratching me,” he said, and laid down on top of her, holding her free arm still. He ran his tongue across her cheek.
“I forgot. You like it rough, don't you?” he said.
Ben attempted to stand up a second time with the chair attached to his back. He staggered once, then gained his balance. He saw Billy push his jeans below his hips and the fury inside Ben exploded. A muffled scream erupted from the depths of his soul. He threw himself onto the bed, the chair knocking Billy off Sydney.
Billy reached for the knife, but Sydney already had it in her hand. She slashed at Billy and drove the blade into his forearm. Billy rolled off the bed in agony. It took seconds for Sydney to cut through the scarves to free herself then rip the tape off her mouth. Billy came back at her and she thrust the knife again, this time hitting him in the thigh.
She turned quickly and went to Ben, doing her best to cut through the cord. Billy grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled her to her feet. In the scuffle, Sydney dropped the knife.
The screams coming from her made every hair on Ben stand on end. Ben watched Sydney struggle in Billy's arms, then her knee slammed into Billy's groin. He fell to the floor a few feet from the knife and Ben. Sydney bolted from the room to get help.
She made it to the living room, just as the police were breaking through her door. One cop held onto her and wrapped a blanket from the couch around her. Three more cops crept down the hall toward the bedroom with their weapons drawn.
“He's trying to kill us!”
The cops entered the bedroom and Sydney struggled in the officer's arms. “He's going to kill Ben!”
“He won't have the chance,” the officer said.
“Drop the knife!”
Seconds after the warning was shouted, a blast from a service revolver reverberated through the apartment. Sydney screamed Ben's name and ran back toward the bedroom and knelt beside him on the floor.
“Please tell me you're okay,” she said, pressing her cheek to his.
“It's over, Sydney,” Ben whispered. “He can't hurt you again.”
Billy lay on the rug a few feet from Ben; a growing circle of his blood soaking through the shirt around a single gunshot wound in his chest.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Ben rolled beside Sydney on the bed and brushed the hair from her forehead.
“You still haven't given me an answer,” he said.
“An answer to what?” she asked with uncertainty.
Two weeks had passed since Billy's attack and not a day went by when Ben didn't think about how close they came to losing everything that mattered. Mrs. Fitch across the hall from Sydney's apartment had called the police that evening. Had she not intervened, Ben wondered if he, Sydney or Jenna would be alive today. In thanks, Ben wrote Mrs. Fitch a very large check and slipped it beneath her apartment door.
The terrifying ordeal made them look at life in a whole new light. They held each other tighter, started each day saying I love you, and cherished every moment with Jenna. Every day was a precious gift.
The experience also kick-started Ben's musical ambitions. He began writing songs again and often used the melodies he played on his acoustic guitar to lull Jenna to sleep.
Ben did his best to instill a new sense of security for Sydney and move her beyond the trauma. The first step was getting her out of her apartment in the city. A moving company had packed her belongings the day after the attack and
delivered everything to Ben's home in Maryland.
She went into seclusion there, having Ben install a high-tech security alarm system and still she was fearful of a new threat coming from an unknown assailant. It had been two days since her night terrors had stopped waking her and only one night since Jenna had been moved into her own bedroom to sleep. Sydney was finally at a point she was relaxing in Ben's embrace and warming to his touch.
“Marry me,” he said, nudging his nose to hers, then covering her mouth.
“It feels like your proposal happened a lifetime ago,” she said.
“No more looking back, Sydney,” he said. He pulled her toward him and rolled on top of her. “From now on, we move forward. You. Me. And Jenna.”
Sydney slid her arms around Ben's neck and pulled him down to her. “I like the sound of that, Ben.”
“And I like the sound of your new name. Sydney Gallo. It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?” he asked.
“Or Sydney Willows-Gallo.”
“As long as my name is part of it, I don't care.”
Ben started unbuttoning her pajama top and eased his hand beneath the fabric to caress her breasts. His lips dropped to her bare skin. His tongue swirled around a nipple, then sucked it inside his mouth.
“Will you marry me?” he asked.
Sydney nodded and Ben kissed her mouth again.
“I need to hear you say it,” he said.
His hand moved between them and began inching inside her panties.
“Yes - I'll marry you.”
Ben smiled and pulled his shirt over his head then laid down beside Sydney. Her fingers went to the tie of his pajama bottoms and tugged until she felt it release. Ben rolled onto his back.
“I don't want a long engagement, Sydney. I think we've waited long enough.”
“I would agree.”
“Take off your pajamas for me,” she whispered against his stomach.
When he was naked, he moved up beside her on the pillows and pulled her against him. “This is where I want you from now on, Sydney…right beside me every night.”