by GR Griffin
I will always be with you Arthur…
Opening his eyes frantically, Arthur lunged at the source of the voice, collapsing onto the ground. His mother was nowhere in sight, the surrounding area empty and dull. Panic clouded his mind. He pushed himself to his feet, outstretching a hand towards where she had once stood.
“Come back.” He ordered into the silence.
Nothing.
“Please come back.” His voice cracked octaves as he spoke, rough and bruised.
A hand grasped his shoulder. Spinning around hopefully, he was graced with Merlin’s morose face. Their eyes met steadily, Arthur found himself unable to protect himself from exposure. Merlin was witnessing his raw, unrefinedemotions. His defences had been obliterated, revealing the catastrophic damage inside. The druid looked almost as distraught as he was, eyes watery and lips pulled into a tight line. Parting his lips, mouth dry, Merlin searched for the right words to say, for something, anything to say. A fragmented ‘Arthur’ was all that left his lips. Arthur heard it, the pity, the way he simply had no idea what to say. It dampened his spirits. The blonde inched out of Merlin’s grasp, eyes cold and distant.
“My whole life is a lie.” He admitted darkly, eyes widening at the realisation. “MY LIFE IS A LIE!” he roared, voice echoing around the clearing. Grabbing the necklace from around his neck, he tossed it forcefully onto the ground. Holding a trembling hand to his temple, Arthur swallowed-hard. His syllables were fractured, words rough to the ears as he whispered.
“I’m a lie-“
Stepping forwards boldly, Merlin reached for the necklace, heart racing as he ran his fingers across the delicately engraved Merlin bird. He wouldn’t let Arthur believe this.
“-That’s not true Arthur,” he placed a hand on Arthur’s shoulder, only to have it shoved off forcefully. Gripping the necklace in his hands, Merlin frowned. “You’re a great man, with a great destiny.”
Arthur laughed, this time he was able to commit to the gesture; he saw Merlin wince at the harshness of it from the corner of his eyes. Destiny and Merlin’s talk of sunshine and rainbows was the last thing he wanted to hear right now. Making his way to the stone alter table, he leant his knuckles against the stone, head bowed. Merlin remained put, unsure how to approach the wild, unpredictable man. Abruptly his hands slashed across the table, knocking the candles down aggressively. They fell, flames dwindling out into nothingness. The fire was gone; all that held him together was now darkness, emptiness.
“Destiny.” Arthur muttered ominously, chewing the word in his mouth, tasting its components, examining its consistency. Funny. Destiny didn’t feel fucking consistent right now.
“Destiny,” he repeated, only this time the word was brittle and injured as he spat it out his mouth.The syllables meshed close together; a slight elongation of the ‘y’ as it screamed for help. Arthur ignored it, turning from the table. “There’s no such thing as destiny Merlin,” taking another step towards the druid, his words quickened. “When are you going to fucking wake up and see the world for what it is?!” Drawing his eyebrows together, Merlin gazed at the dishevelled man in anguish. “People do not change, times do not change. It’s all the same do you hear me?!”
The druid recoiled at the abrupt change in Arthur’s voice; he was now thriving in this newfound rage.
“There is no good in this world. I was wrong to have trusted magic, wrong to have trusted anybody-“ that was enough to snap Merlin out of silence.
“-Arthur.” He growled, levelling his own voice to meet the blonde’s. He was not going to let Arthur throw away all he had learnt so easily. “You’re wrong, you’re not thinking straight-”
“-You’re wrong.” The blonde snapped back, eyeing his friend dangerously. “Life is evil, magic is evil. I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.”
Throwing his hands despairingly into the air, Merlin blinked rapidly to avoid the tears streaming down his face.
“How can you say that? How can you just dismiss everything you believe in?”
Glowering at the druid, Arthur clutched the druid by his shirt belligerently.
“How do you know what I believe in, Emrys-“
Merlin’s eyes darkened, upset streaked over his face. Pushing himself out of the man’s grasp, he glared at Arthur threateningly. How dare he bring this up, now of all times, when he knew Merlin’s resilience had been breaking down.
“-Don’t call me Emrys-“
Grinning sadistically, Arthur pulled Merlin back into his clutches, toying with the druid. Their faces were close, Arthur’s ragged breath fanned over his face. Arthur moved his hands to Merlin’s face, holding him in place. Averting his gaze, Merlin gulped a lungful of air nervously, furiously. He could cast one spell and Arthur would be propelled backwards at any moment. But he wouldn’t, because what Arthur needed right now was something to trust.
“-Why?” eyes never leaving Merlin’s face, Arthur raised is eyebrows questioningly. He received no answer, only Merlin’s sad eyes. “Does it make you feel small-“
“-Arthur-“
“-Or…” the blonde laughed resentfully, pacing back from Merlin. The druid stumbled back, one hand pressed to his sore face. “Does it make you feel all high and mighty, knowing how great your fucking destiny is? How every druid thinks you are the equivalent of Jesus, the savoir of their kind.” Merlin shuddered, feeling the tears prickle against his eyes. This was hardly fair. Knowing he’d hit a weak spot, Arthur heartlessly continued with this emotional assault.
“Well guess what Merlin, you and your little magical friends need to wake up to reality. You are not special. None of you are special. If anything you’re outcasts, rejects of modern society.”
Merlin wanted to tell himself Arthur didn’t mean it. He was angry, upset. Merlin was the only person available to lash out at, the only person he could emotionally pummel. The words stabbed his heart viciously, increasing the likelihood for his body to succumb to the tears. Somehow, Merlin restrained his emotions, speaking hoarsely over the distress building in his body.
“You’re angry. I’m trying to understand Arthur, really I am but I can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now. You have to listen to me and not do anything-“
“-Shut-up.” Arthur spat, turning away from him.
“-Arthur-“
“-SHUT-UP.”
Arthur walked through the blinding light back into the tranquil forests. Merlin followed. But he did not shut-up. Arthur wasn’t thinking clearly, he needed someone to at least try and ground him before he did something he would regret. He continued talking. As he spoke, Arthur strode forwards resolutely, eyes blazing with fury. He resembled a man on a mission; a dangerous, very angryman who should not be meddled with.
“Your father still loves Igraine-“
Arthur spun back around viciously.
“-No he doesn’t. If he still loved her then Morgana, my sister, wouldn’t be here.”
Resting a hand on his shoulder, Merlin frowned.
“Please stop it Arthur this won’t solve anything-”
Forcefully, Arthur wrapped his hand around Merlin’s wrist, burning the skin in a tight vice grip. He shoved the hand away with brute strength, too livid to fully control his actions or restrain himself.
“-What part of shut-up don’t you fucking understand? This has nothing to do with you so keep your fucking nose out of it.”
Failing to notice Merlin’s anguish, he began to utter a spell, a very familiar spell. Widening his eyes, Merlin gasped. When the spell was finished, the blonde glared menacingly into the distance.
“I think it’s time I paid my father a little visit.”
Rushing forwards, Merlin lunged for Arthur desperately.
“-NO!”
But he was too late.
Arthur Pendragon had teleported back to Camelot Base, to confront his father in blinded fury. Merlin supposed any other druid would have been thrilled at this prospect. All he felt was panic and dread. Not even L
ucinda could stop the tears that slid down his face.
Arthur was going to kill Uther Pendragon.
Chapter 32
He entered the room quietly, expertly weaving his way around the door in a manner that avoided unnecessary sound. For a moment he just stood there, staring at the man. His eyes were watery and he could barely control his shaking body. Every part of him was on edge, everything inside hurt. His mother was dead, she had been ruthlessly sacrificed- it was all Uther Pendragon’s fault.
“Ah Arthur. There you are,” the man said in relief, too engrossed in the paperwork on his table to look up and see the stern expression. He continued sorting out the piles on the desk. “I suppose you’ve come to tell me good news.”
Silence.
Raising his eyebrows, Uther gazed up at his son expectantly. Instantly he knew something was wrong. His son’s face was rife with anger, eyebrows drawn close, teeth gritted together. The blonde hair was stuck to his forehead with sweat; his eyes were blotchy and reddened. The eyes were the most shocking, for they were burning, searing with something. Calculatedly, Arthur placed his hands on each side of the desk with a feigned calmness. He looked more like a predator waiting to strike its prey, dangerous and deceptive. Uther almost felt unnerved by this.
“I know what you did to my mother.” He spat each word out bitterly, eyes locking threateningly on the man before him.
Standing up gradually, Uther met his son’s gaze.
“What are you talking about-“
“-You were so desperate for an heir you were prepared to use magic-“
“-Whoever told you this is lying.” Uther barked dismissively, waving a hand towards his son who loomed closer.
“My mother is dead because of your selfishness and arrogance. Her blood is on your hands.”
♦☼♦
Merlin landed in an empty, disused room of Camelot Base. He made his way towards the door urgently, walking out into the corridor. He didn’t bother looking if anyone was there. He knew this was reckless, walking amongst those who could imprison him any moment. But he had to find Arthur, fast. Arthur was going to make a huge mistake; he had to stop him. Breaking into a frantic run, he sped through the dreary corridors. This merely led to more corridors and useless signs that didn’t actually specify where everything was. Finding Uther’s office was going to be the biggest problem, this place was huge.
“Merlin!” A voice called out in blatant surprise.
Merlin skidded to a halt, darting round to meet Morgana – Arthur’s sister. Yes he could see it now. Her eyes were laced in confusion, sensing the panic in his system as she rushed towards him cautiously.
“What are you doing here?”
“There…he…I…where’s Uther’s office?” he said quickly, heart pounding in his chest.
“You can’t be serious Merlin.” She replied sternly. “If Uther knew you were here he would take you straight to the lab himself-“
Right now, he hardly cared about his own wellbeing.
“-It’s Arthur. He’s going to do something terrible I have to stop him. Please! Morgana, you have to take me there.” Morgana chewed on her lip, uncertain.
“Now Morgana!” he demanded with a hint of wild anger. There was no time to talk or dwell on this. He had minutes, possibly seconds.
Nodding, she gestured to the corridor behind them.
“Follow me.”
♦☼♦
“I have heard enough of this!” Uther demanded, voice ominous, eyes fierce.
But Arthur was no longer afraid of him or his authority. After all this man had done, he had no right to command Arthur, to tell him what to do. Snarling, he kept his distance from the man. Everything was all clear now. The labs, the way he treated the druids.
“This is what fuels your hatred for magic. Rather than blame yourself for what you did, you blame them.”
Uther appeared unaffected by the statement, bringing a hand to his chin thoughtfully.
“I should have never let you near the druids, they have clearly enchanted you.”
Arthur shook his head in disbelief. Camelot Enterprise was founded on disruption and lies. This whole project was a sham; the whole business was worthless and immoral. Finally, he was not afraid to accept the truth. A wave of relief washed over him, freedom. He was no longer chained to the will of this man. This man had pushed him around like a pawn on his chessboard long enough. Now the pawn was taking a stand, fighting back with his battalion. The pawn was now a knight, a knight for justice.
“You have captured hundreds of innocent druids, extracting their magic, torturing them for answers, testing them and god knows what else you haven’t allowed me to see-“
“-Those that practice magic are evil.” Uther recited, holding a hand out warily.
Clenching his fists, Arthur took a step towards the man, finger pointed in an accusatory manner.
“You’re nothing but a hypocrite and a liar-”
“-I am your father.” Uther growled menacingly.
A few weeks ago, a few days ago these words would have crumbled any resistance building inside Arthur. He would have succumbed to his father obediently, bending under his will to do what he was told- like a good son. The words recoiled brutally; they lay obliterated on the floor, murdered savagely between the two men. Lifting his head defiantly, Arthur reached back for the blade in his belt, ignoring the flash of alarm in the other’s eyes.
“I no longer think of myself as your son.”
♦☼♦
“How far are we?” Merlin snapped, walking briskly beside the woman.
Anxiety was consuming his body, swallowing any hint of optimism and bleak hope. His wrist was still sore from Arthur’s firm grip. He could feel the bruising forming around it. As usual, Merlin was selfless. He ignored it. He didn’t even blame Arthur for it. The man had just been told horrific news from his deceased mother who had vanished from sight as quick as she appeared. The whole situation was tumultuous and messy, yet alone complicated.
“A few more minutes.” She replied, heavily disliking this side of Merlin. However, the reasoning for his behaviour panicked her. He had mentioned Arthur and Uther- she had not questioned him. The words burst from her mouth spontaneously.
“What’s going on Merlin?”
“We don’t have a few more minutes, it’ll be too late.” He hissed under his breath, suddenly breaking into an agitated run.
“Merlin?!” Morgana yelled after him.
♦☼♦
“I want nothing to do with you and this company. The deal is off. I’m not doing your dirty work ever again, just because you asked me to. I’m through with all this shit. I’m through with Camelot, for good. Consider this my resignation with immediate effect-” Arthur spat, hand tightly gripping the blade in his belt.
“Arthur-“
“-Find yourself a new heir. Though I’m sure you won’t need to look too hard…” his eyes pierced mercilessly through his father’s. The recognition of what Arthur really meant struck Uther in the chest, panic and shock sprawled over his face. Morgana. Before he could conceal it, Arthur saw it. It was a confirmation of everything, and it disgusted Arthur. The man’s resolve broke quickly, his words lacking in their austerity. Funny, Arthur seemed to now be in command of the situation.
“Arthur. Think about this logically. These accusations against me, you have no proof. I am your father-“
Arthur thought to pull the gun from his belt out and get it over with quickly. Instead he reached for the blade savagely, pointing its sharpened edge towards the man ruthlessly. His mother had died a slow and painful death, why should his father’s not be the same? Defenceless, Uther paced backwards slowly, well aware of his son’s agility and vigour.
“-Don’t move!” Arthur yelled authoritatively. “Don’t fucking move.” At his words, his father became motionless. “Or I will strike you down where you stand.”
Their eyes met, Arthur’s full of darkness and Uther’s overwhelmed with apprehens
ion. His son looked like a ferocious killer, insatiable and totally possessed by anger. Unable to hold his gaze, the man averted his eyes back to the sword in his son’s hands. He swallowed-hard.
“You wouldn’t kill me.” Uther said cautiously, holding his hands up to gesture surrender.
At this challenge Arthur tightened his grip on the blade, striding forwards.
“-ARTHUR!” the doors burst open dramatically.
Merlin rushed towards Arthur hysterically, not caring that Uther Pendragon was in the room. The blonde man clutched the sword tighter, not looking over towards the druid.
“Arthur, don’t! Please.”
“You saw what he’s responsible for Merlin, everything he’s done!” Arthur cried, tears welling in his eyes, anger melting away into melancholy. It took a hell of a lot of force to keep the sword upright in his trembling hands. “How can you show him mercy? After what he’s done to Gaius, to your people?”
Grimacing, Merlin caught Uther’s eyes. Instead of the expected hatred and fury, Merlin found curiosity. This didn’t settle him, it made him feel anxious. Turning his attention to back to Arthur, he placed his hand gently onto one of the broad shoulders.
“This is not what your mother would want you to do-“
“-He’s right.” Uther muttered, instigating a final outlet of anger from Arthur.
“-Don’t speak. I don’t ever want to hear your voice again.”
Another figure entered the room, stunned at the sight. Arthur had Uther cornered, sword dangerously close to his father. She remained silent, too shocked to find words. Her eyes drifted from a furious Arthur, a cowering Uther and a bold Merlin who was standing beside the blonde man.
“Arthur. Drop it.” His low voice mimicked the tone a person would use to speak to a disobedient animal. Outstretching his palms, his eyes flickered gold tauntingly. “Don’t make me use my magic.”