The Rabbit Great And Terrible

by Chereta, Nelson

  “But what if it comes back to you, darling?” Alice asked worriedly.

  “Then my reputation will be made, and mother will be really proud.”

  Alice gave a despondent sigh. “Well, done is done I suppose. But promise me one thing, once we get to Torikai you’ll stop preaching about magical rabbits.”

  “You don’t need to be worried about that, Alice. Starting tomorrow I’ll be much too busy with real work to be a religious leader.”

  Alice rolled her eyes and lay down to go to sleep. “I just hope none of this causes any problems for us later.”

  Waldo laughed as he got ready to go to sleep too. “How much trouble could seven people with a new religion possibly cause?”

  XXX

  Early the following morning the caravan came to a halt. Still miles short of Torikai the Gold Road was jammed tight with wagons, carriages, and carts going in either direction. Seeing it would be faster to go the rest of the way on foot, Waldo and his party set off. As they were leaving Derren and the other followers came to say farewell.

  Waldo placed his hands behind his head. “The love of the Rabbit unto you.”

  “And unto you as well.” The seven of them replied.

  “I wish all of you the very best,” Waldo said. “And remember, no matter how many people may laugh or refuse to believe you, keep telling everyone about the Great Rabbit Kookoocachoo. Especially that we White Mages serve him.”

  “We will, Master Rabbit,” Derren said as the others nodded. “We will spread his truth to all the world.”

  “Good to know.” Waldo gave them a cheerful wave and set off down the road and past the wagons and horses stuck in place. He didn’t bother to look back even once. Being a cult leader had been fun and definitely kept him from being bored.

  As Alice went with him, Cleptus, and Belle she turned back for a moment. What she saw was Derren, Cuthbert, Gerta, and the others all rooted to the spot staring at them. Derren’s eyes were wide and unblinking, like a starving man staring at a table covered with food. When Alice looked away she felt a little nervous. She reminded herself that she would probably never see any of them again, so it didn’t matter.

  XXX

  When Master Rabbit was finally gone from sight Derren spoke to the rest of his herd.

  “The first thing we need to do is establish the church. Then we can begin spreading the word of Kookoocachoo.”

  They all nodded.

  Chapter 5

  The City Of Fortune And Ruin

  As Waldo and the rest of his party set out he motioned Cleptus over.

  “You go on ahead. As we discussed, you’ll be on your own from now until I’m ready to leave. Check in with the Mouse’s Ear Tavern every day. I’ll leave a message for you when the time comes.”

  Waldo had spoken with Derren and the others quite a bit and learned a lot about Torikai. The Mouse’s Ear was a popular drinking hole about a mile outside the Gold Wall.

  Cleptus rubbed his hands together. “Got it.”

  “Do whatever you like and steal to your heart’s content. But don’t get caught. I have no use for an incompetent thief.”

  “I know what I’m about. I used to run my own thieves’ guild remember?”

  “Yes. It seemed a fine establishment. If you hadn’t tried to kill me, it might still exist.” Cleptus sent him a hooded look, which Waldo ignored.

  “You don’t need to worry, I’m the best at what I do.”

  “Well, you’re certainly competent,” Waldo admitted. “But the Gold Guards are said to be very good at dealing with thieves, and they have the help of a mage guild.”

  “If you could make me invisible that might make things easier.”

  Waldo shook his head. “I’m not going to meet with you just to cast spells on you. If you don’t think you can manage without being invisible you’re worthless to me.”

  “I didn’t say I need it, just that it would help. Don’t worry, I’ve been thieving since I was knee high to a goblin.”

  “That’s good, but keep in mind what will happen if you get caught.”

  “I know, I know,” Cleptus held out his right hand in front of himself. Then brought his left swinging down towards the wrist. “Chop. Chop.”

  “That won’t be the worst of it. If you get caught and lose your hand I won’t need your services anymore. So, I won’t have any reason to renew the morio seal and your heart will explode.”

  Cleptus grimaced. “I’ll keep that in mind. Since I’m leaving could you do it now?”

  “Certainly,” Waldo waggled his fingers on both hands. “Est vet morio. There, now your heart will continue beating for three more days.”

  “You won’t forget to keep doing it every three days, will you? Sometimes I have to remind you!”

  “Certainly not. And remember, you have no connection to me. Don’t mention me to anyone and absolutely do not try and get in touch with me. If you run into anyone from the caravan tell them you’ve left my service.”

  “I should be so lucky,” he muttered. Cleptus hurried ahead and was soon lost among the wagons and carriages.

  Alice walked at her husband’s side. “Darling, is this really a good idea? Just letting him be on his own?”

  “Don’t worry, so long as he believes the seal is genuine he won’t abandon us.”

  “That’s not what I’m worried about. What if he gets in trouble? What if he gets caught?”

  “Torikai may not be the greatest city in the world, but it’s the richest. What’s the point in having a thief if I’m not going to take advantage of him? And if he does get caught, anything he claims will sound like a desperate lie. A thief stealing on the orders of a White Mage? A White Mage travelling with a pair of Great Monsters? Who’s going to believe that even for a moment?”

  Alice considered and gave an uncertain nod. “I suppose.”

  Waldo appeared to have no doubts at all and continued striding along the Gold Road.

  XXX

  They had to walk another two miles before they even got in sight of the city. They topped a hill and finally saw Torikai. When Alice laid eyes on it she literally gasped.

  “It’s true! There’s a wall made of gold!”

  “It’s an illusion Alice,” Waldo said completely unimpressed. “It’s not real.”

  She didn’t seem to hear him. “It’s shining so bright it’s hard to look at!” She had to cover her eyes with a hand.

  “Volcanoes are much more beautiful, and they’re real. Have you ever seen an eruption in the middle of the night? Utterly breathtaking!”

  She continued, still not seeming to hear him. “And look how huge Torikai is! I always thought Stratford was a big city. But you could fit fifty of them here, a hundred!”

  Most of the city was not enclosed inside the Gold Wall. Rather, it was surrounded for miles on all sides by tiny brown and gray buildings. A golden island in a sea choked with debris.

  “A mountain of shit is still shit.”

  Belle let out a sudden giggle. “Good one, master.”

  Alice turned to Waldo. “How can you not be impressed?”

  He looked back at her in surprise. “Really? Would you be impressed by shit just because there is a whole mountain of it?” He started walking again.

  XXX

  Six roads led into Torikai from six different directions, all of them converging at the Wall. The city also had the mighty Acushnet River running through it. The Acushnet ran through most of the lands west of Torikai and then went north until it emptied into the Storm Sea. There was a row of docks built just below the Gold Wall, with multiple boats tied alongside every single pier. Just as the roads leading to the city were filled with traffic, the river was lined with anchored boats waiting their chance to dock. It was easy to see why Torikai was said to have anything and everything available for sale.

  The road had two deep sets of ruts carved into it. The line of wagons and carts ran unbroken all the way to the Gold Wall. Their wooden wheels neatly inside th
ose grooves. There was traffic heading out of the city as well, but much less of it. Those drivers could move freely out of Torikai. Waldo and his group walked along the edge of the road, with a wagon to one side and the city itself to the other.

  Seeing Torikai close up only confirmed all of Waldo’s earlier opinions. Most of the buildings he passed could best be described as shacks or hovels. They seemed to have been put together with whatever bits and pieces people could find. Old wooden boards were stuck inside piled up rocks, sod, and crumbling mud bricks. Windows were gaps big enough to stick a hand or face through. Often, the door was simply a piece of cloth hanging down. These dirty, broken down structures were crammed in tight. Between streets, there would be fifteen, sixteen, as many as twenty small houses pressed together. And when there was the occasional alleyway in between, it would be choked full of trash and human waste. Rats skittered about openly and the locals paid them no mind.

  “I can see why they call this part of the city the Rats Nest,” Waldo said.

  Alice gave a dispirited nod. “How can people live like this? I’ve never seen anything so filthy!”

  “It’s not so bad,” Belle pointed at a nice big juicy rat pawing at a clump of grass. “At least there are snacks everywhere. Convenient.”

  “Not everyone has an ogre’s stomach,” Alice said as she rubbed at her nose.

  “In Alter, all the buildings are made of black stone and built to the same standard. The streets are pristine, and you won’t find a single rat,” Waldo said proudly. “It is the greatest city in the world.”

  “Didn’t you tell me the air there stinks of sulfur, the rain is black, and you never see the sun?” Alice asked.

  “Yes,” Waldo sighed. He had a sudden bout of homesickness.

  "When I was a barmaid I heard a lot of stories about Torikai, the Golden City. All the merchants ever talked about was how beautiful and rich it was. They told me about the Arena and the Gold Wall and the White Palace and the queen who is the most beautiful in the world. Somehow, none of the stories ever mentioned this."

  "I'm not surprised," Waldo said. "The boring parts always get left out."

  XXX

  Along with the buildings, the people themselves were different from what Waldo was used to. For a start, there were just a lot of them. Screaming children, weary old men, haggard mothers, teenagers, and all other sorts could be seen running about or else standing there watching the caravans inch their way forward. In the same way Waldo had never seen so many structures crammed together in so little space, he had also never seen such numbers of people for mile after mile.

  Oh, back in Alter he'd seen crowds gather on the solstices and on the feast days. This was different though; this unending throng hadn't come together for any kind of celebration or special event. They were here in such numbers simply because this was where they lived, and, he supposed, because they had nowhere else to be.

  They were all dressed in plain grey and brown homespun. All the clothes were dirty and muddy, some were so worn and holey they were little more than rags. Almost none of them wore shoes. Waldo found the sight of them rather depressing, back home even the lowest slaves were better off than this. Every master understood that living slaves needed to be provided food, clothing, and shelter. Weak and sickly slaves couldn't provide as much labor as healthy ones. Alteroth would never permit so many people to exist in these conditions. If owners couldn't afford the basic necessities for their slaves it made more sense to hire a necromancer and convert them over to undead labor. It was just one more proof of why Alter was superior.

  The locals were different in another way too. Everywhere else they’d visited, the mundanes had kept a respectful distance from him. They’d shown enough good sense to be wary of anyone dressed in white robes. But here in the Rats Nest, the commoners appeared to be a bit strange in the head. As he walked along they smiled at him and called out welcome. They looked him directly in the face. No one moved to get away from him, instead, they remained exactly where they were and nodded as he went past, as if they were friends who saw each other every day! Groups of children even approached him and got within arm’s reach, like some pack of feral rabbits seeking prey. Don’t these people realize I am the living embodiment of horror and despair?! Waldo thought.

  Some of the children asked him if he wanted to play with them.

  Then a gaunt fellow with a thick grey beard walked straight up to Waldo and held out a hand. "Could you spare anything, master? I'm so very hungry."

  Waldo stopped and stared at the man in utter confusion. "If you're hungry you should go buy some food then."

  "I don't have any money."

  "Then you should find some work or sell yourself into slavery. I'm afraid I don't need any slaves right now, and if I did I'd want someone younger and healthier."

  The old man's mouth opened and closed wordlessly.

  Alice came over and delivered an elbow into Waldo's ribs. "Ow!"

  "My husband is joking, he's a very funny man." She opened the bulging purse tied to her hip and fished out a couple coins. She put them in his hand.

  "May all the gods bless you!" The man said happily and turned away.

  "Why did you do that?" Waldo asked as he rubbed his side. "You're the one who is always worried about how much coin we have."

  "I only gave him a couple coppers."

  "You still just gave away coins we worked hard for."

  Alice rolled her eyes. "Darling, everything we have we stole."

  "Yes, and we worked very hard stealing it. Why would you give any of it away?"

  "He needed it more than we do."

  "So, we should just give our coins away to anyone who needs them more?"

  "That's called charity."

  Waldo frowned. "I've never heard that word before."

  "Why am I not surprised?"

  "So, charity is another word for insanity or madness?"

  Alice sighed. "We have plenty of money, it doesn't hurt for us to share some of it with the less fortunate. Terassa and the other gods will definitely show us favor if we do."

  "That is not true, and as a religious leader and prophet I can say that with authority."

  As they continued walking, more and more people came up to them with their hands out. And each time Alice would give them a couple copper coins. Throwing their money away as if tossing it into a river. Waldo knew better than to try and order her to behave, he didn't need another elbow to the ribs or kick to his back side. All he could do was watch and mutter to himself.

  "Charity, it's just sheer charity."

  XXX

  Along the way, they spotted a squad of royal guards with golden helms and chainmail leading a family of five away. There was a father, mother, and the three young children. The youngest was a little girl who looked about five. All had their hands bound together with a single rope. One guard kept hold of the rope, while all the others kept an eye on the people of the neighborhood. Every guard had his sword drawn.

  The locals didn't get in their way but made their feelings known. They mocked and insulted the guards. Called them whoresons and cowards and said none of them would dare come out here at night. The guards never said a word in answer, they just kept their prisoners moving.

  "That's horrible," Alice said.

  "I agree," Waldo said. "Where I come from people treat guards with more respect. Insulting them is the same as insulting the House they serve."

  "That's not what I mean. Why are they taking away a whole family?"

  "Well, from what Derren told me, the father probably has debts he couldn't pay back. When that happens, the man and his entire family are arrested and held until the sum can be repaid."

  "But that's completely unjust! Punishing a whole family like that just because they owe money!"

  "It's their own fault for borrowing more than they could afford."

  "What do you think will happen to them?"

  "The man looks healthy, so he'll probably be sent to the fighting pi
ts. The gladiators earn one silver mark per match. The woman looks attractive, but she has had three children, she might be sent to a brothel or made a servant, depends on how appealing her body still is. You can always find tasks for children; child labor is cheap labor. The important thing is the debt gets repaid."

  Alice made a revolted face. "So, they're all being made indentured servants just because their father borrowed money and couldn't pay it back? What if he only borrowed to pay for food or medicine for a sick child?"