The Rabbit Great And Terrible

by Chereta, Nelson

  “I don’t know, and I don’t care,” Waldo said. “What’s important is that it matters to her. We get Belle in the tournament, she wins the tournament, I get my map where X marks the dragon’s lair, and I am one long step closer to completing my quest and going home. With any luck, one of the other contestants will be a knight. That’ll count as one of the conditions of my quest fulfilled. It’s simple and straightforward. What could possibly go wrong?”

  Alice drew a circle over her heart to ward off evil. “I have no idea, but whenever you say something like that something usually does.”

  He gave her a confident smile. “Don’t worry, the Dark Powers are finally smiling on me. Nothing can stop me now.”

  She drew another circle over her heart.

  XXX

  The Arena was a massive amphitheater that towered over everything near it. The exterior was four levels of arches, with statues depicting warriors, monsters, and beasts displayed within in each archway. Inside was enough room to seat sixty thousand. It was the largest gathering place in all the world. In sheer size, it was a match for Castle Corpselover and the other great castles of Alter. With its mass and beautifully carved arches and statues, Waldo would grudgingly admit that unlike the Gold Wall or the imaginary guildhall, this at least was impressive.

  So, (of course!) the local mages had slapped illusions on it. The entire exterior of the Arena was red. Not blood red, not brick red, not fire red; but all of them, and every shade in between. As you looked on, the stone darkened and then lightened, as though the building were going through bouts of embarrassment or anger. Also, there were two white stallions chasing one another round and round the top. Waldo found himself scratching his arm as they approached.

  XXX

  Adjoining the Arena on one side was a domed building trimmed in gold. Standing outside was an energetic young man promising anyone who would listen that they could make a fortune inside. The man hesitated when he saw a White Mage walking up to him.

  “I’m terribly sorry, sir, but I’m afraid mages are barred from playing in the gaming houses.”

  Waldo could understand why. Certain basic spells would let you rig any number of games. He would have to remember that for the future. “Is this where you can register a contestant for the queen’s tournament?”

  The man’s eyes widened. “It is. Just ask for Fornette.”

  Waldo gave a brisk nod and went inside. Hanging down from the dome, was a massive sign with foot tall letters painted in gold. It was the first thing anyone coming in would notice. Its message was simple.:

  WE HONOR ALL BETS

  Within the building, there were tables where men gathered about to play all sorts of games. Dice, cards, and cups were all to be seen. At a couple tables were massive wheels with sections painted red, gold, silver, and green, and each slice was given a number. When a man in a gold and red costume spun the wheel all the people gathered began screaming out a number or color. One section of the floor had been dug up and a miniature fighting pit created. Two dogs were inside attacking one another as spectators cheered. Women in low cut and revealing dresses circulated through the room with trays of food and drink. The air was heavy with pipe smoke, alcohol, and sweat. The crowd was loud and raucous and focused on the different games.

  To the rear of the room was a large cage with thick iron bars, six guards stood watch over it. In front of the cage were three separate tables, each had one man seated with a ledger, ink well, wooden pen, stacks of parchment, a scale, weights, a lit candle, sealing wax, and stamps. Behind each table was another pair of royal guards. Nailed up on the back wall of the cage was a blackboard with twenty-two names neatly written down with numbers following.

  QUEEN MADIS BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION TOURNAMENT

  Odds:

  Varca 1 – 100

  Sir Hector of Falmouth 40 – 1

  Sir Varnin of Lion’s Den 50 – 1

  Sir Draymor of Pinellas 50 – 1

  All the other names had 100-1 written after them.

  Waldo was not inside for longer than a minute before a rail thin-man dressed in a gold shirt and crimson trousers hurried up to him.

  “Welcome to the Arena Gaming House, Master.” The man said with a hasty bow. “I am Fornette, the manager. I sincerely hope you have not come here to cause trouble.”

  “Trouble?” Waldo asked.

  “Last week the ambassador stood outside and spent the entire day shouting that the games are murder and a sin.” The man ran a finger along his collar. “If you intend to do that inside I will have to ask you to leave. If you are going to scream abuse at us it will have to be from the street.”

  I see Melissa is as popular here as with the drow. Waldo thought. “No, I’m not here for that. I’m just here to enter my servant into the tournament.”

  “The tournament?” Fornette replied blankly.

  “The queen’s birthday tournament,” Waldo pointed up at the blackboard. “That one.”

  The man simply stood there a moment staring at Waldo.

  “Is there something wrong?” Waldo finally asked.

  “Master, could we perhaps speak in private?”

  XXX

  They were soon in Fornette’s cramped office. Shelves covered all four walls and went from floor to ceiling. Every shelf was loaded down with books. On the floor were still more of them, along with baskets filled to over flowing with paper. There was barely enough room left for a desk and a single chair. The room smelled of musty paper and ink. Fornette sat behind his desk and Waldo was in the chair. Alice and Belle were standing shoulder to shoulder just behind.

  Fornette’s hands were on his desk, twisting about. “Your request is very surprising, to say the least. Master…”

  “Waldo Rabbit of Avalon,” he nodded to his companions. “This is my wife, Alice Rabbit, and my servant Belle of Tarsus. She is the one who will be fighting.”

  “Ah, yes,” Fornette squirmed about in his seat. “Are you absolutely certain you want to do that, Master Rabbit?”

  “Yes.”

  “You… are aware all the matches are to the death? Without exception?”

  “I’ve heard that.”

  “Are you really certain you want to put your servant in such a dangerous situation?”

  “Thanks for the concern, sweetie, but I’m tougher than I look. I’ll scratch their eyes out.” Belle pawed the air. “Rawr.”

  Fornette chewed his bottom lip as both hands rapidly slapped his desk.

  “Is there a problem?” Waldo asked.

  “It’s just this is rather… unique.”

  “What? Never had a girl fight before?” Belle asked.

  “As a matter of fact, we have, though the last was more than thirty years ago. What I’m referring to is the fact a White Mage is sponsoring you. Given Mistress Cornwall’s behavior, I was under the impression all White Mages were against the games.”

  “We are, but I’m an exception. My servant is eager for a little bloodshed, and I figured this way everyone could enjoy it.”

  “Do we get to eat the people we kill?” Belle asked, sounding quite serious.

  “Wh…what?” Fornette choked out.

  “Doesn’t have to be all of them. Maybe just an arm? From each?”

  Alice dug an elbow into Belle’s side. “She’s joking! Nomads from the plains have a strange sense of humor!”

  Fornette gave an uncomfortable nod.

  “If her gender is not the issue, what is?” Waldo asked.

  “Well… the fact you are sponsoring her. Given Avalon’s attitudes, it is rather jarring to have a White Mage come here and say he wants one of his people to participate.”

  Waldo shrugged. “For all things, there is a first time.”

  Fornette hesitated. “It’s just, we wouldn’t want to offend you if she were to be killed. I’m sure she is a fine warrior, but we have knights and veteran mercenaries competing as well. The champion’s prize is five hundred gold marks, even with the risks many men are willing
to take the chance.”

  “That’s wonderful!” Waldo exclaimed.

  “It is?”

  “Of course! When she wins I’ll have five hundred more gold coins!”

  “But… well… Varca has been our gladiatorial champion for the past six years. He is the favorite to win again this year too. A heavy favorite.”

  Waldo recalled seeing that name at the top of the blackboard with 1-100 next to it. He didn’t give it a second thought. Even if this Varca was a great fighter, Waldo would still favor a Great Monster in any one to one match.

  “Darling?” Alice spoke up. “Maybe this isn’t-”

  “I understand,” Waldo said. “And I am willing to take the risk. If Belle should fall I will not blame you or anyone else.”

  Fornette wrung his hands together.

  “Is there another problem?” Waldo asked with a hint of annoyance.

  The man took a deep breath and slowly shook his head. “No, Master Rabbit. If you are certain. I will register her. I only ask you to remember your pledge should she fall.” He opened the book sitting on his desk and dipped a pen in the inkwell. He handed the pen to Belle and turned the book around. “Put your mark right here.”

  Belle put an ‘X’ on the spot he pointed to.

  “You are now registered as a contestant in the queen’s birthday celebration tournament.” Fornette stood up and bowed across his desk. “On behalf of her majesty, the mage guild of Torikai, and myself, I honor your courage, Belle of Tarsus. I wish you glory and the favor of all the gods. You must return to this building by an hour before noon, six days from now. Should you fall you shall be given a funeral pyre or burial at state expense. Do you have a preference?”

  XXX

  Following the registration, a man went up a ladder and added a name to the blackboard.

  Belle of Tarsus 100-1

  Waldo turned to Alice. “How much gold do we have?”

  She slapped both hands protectively to the purse she carried. “Why?”

  “How much?”

  “Twenty-seven coins total.” Alice didn’t need to count them. She always kept a careful track of how much they had.

  “Good. Let’s bet all of it on Belle to win the tournament.”

  “All of it?” She gasped. “How are we going to pay for food or rooms?”

  “We’ll only bet the gold. The silver and copper we have should be plenty.”

  “But twenty-seven gold coins is a fortune! What if Belle loses?”

  “Awwww, you don’t have any faith in me?” Belle pouted.

  “Oh, you know I do! But there’s still a risk!”

  “If Belle loses, then I lose her, and she is worth far more than twenty-seven gold coins to me,” Waldo said.

  “Thank you, master! A girl likes to be appreciated.”

  “If she wins though, those twenty-seven coins will become two thousand and seven hundred. Along with the prize that will be three thousand and two hundred gold coins. All our money problems will be solved. I can buy a castle if I want or a fleet of war galleys. And when I return home my mother will be proud of me.”

  “Thirty-two hundred pieces of gold,” she whispered. “I can’t even imagine that much money.” She frowned. “But it’s still all the gold we have.”

  “If Belle loses we won’t care about the gold,” Waldo said. “And when she wins twenty-seven will be nothing. You can give that away to the poor if you want.”

  “Really?”

  Waldo thought about it. He pictured giving the dirty mundanes he’d seen actual gold. “No, not really, but you can throw away all the copper we have.”

  Alice nodded and untied the purse.

  XXX

  A man at one of the tables balanced the coins against lead weights. When he was satisfied, he recorded the wager in his ledger. He then wrote the name of the fighter, the amount wagered, the odds, and the volume and page number where the wager had been recorded. He then melted a bit of wax over the candle flame on his table. He poured the gold colored wax onto the parchment and pressed the mage guild’s seal into it.

  The clerk handed the paper to him. “Should your fighter win the tournament you must present your ticket here to claim your winnings. Winnings will not be paid out without possession of the ticket. The guild is not responsible if your ticket is lost or destroyed.”

  Waldo folded it up and slid it into one of the many pockets of his robe. “Well, this has been a productive day. Let’s get some dinner and find an inn.”

  XXX

  Fornette stood outside his office and watched them leave. One of his employees came up to him.

  “Was that smart, sir?”

  “No, probably not,” Fornette admitted. “But the instructions from the guild are clear, they want as many people in the tournament as they can get. They can’t blame me for this.”

  “Do you think the barbarian woman has a chance?”

  Fornette sneered. “Against Varca? Don’t be stupid, now get back to work.”

  Chapter 12

  Appearances Can Be Deceiving

  “Five silver coins per night! It’s outrageous!” Alice complained.

  “I’m sure if you’d used your Charm you could have gotten a significant discount,” Waldo told her.

  They had gotten a single room at the Silver Harp Inn. It was spacious enough and had two sturdy beds. It was certainly nicer than anywhere they’d stayed in before.

  Alice crossed her arms over her chest. “You know I don’t like doing that to people.”

  “Then don’t complain about the prices. The other two inns we checked weren’t any cheaper. It seems most of them are already occupied. A lot of people are here for the celebration.”

  “We could stay at one of the places outside the Wall,” Alice suggested. “I bet they’re a lot more reasonable.”

  “And more dangerous,” Waldo said. “Even if the Gold City makes me itch, it’s still safer than the Rats Nest.”

  “We’ve stayed in worse places. Remember Pigslaughter Junction?”

  “I liked that place,” Belle said. “They had all you could eat pigs’ feet for just two coppers.”

  “That was because the inn was right next to a slaughterhouse,” Alice reminded.

  “I remember,” Belle sighed. “It was scenic and had a great aroma.”

  “We are not staying in the Rats Nest for the next six days,” Waldo said. “We’ll stay here and pay the higher prices. It’s worth it for the extra safety.”

  “Darling, it’s perfectly safe for us. You have me and Belle to protect you, not to mention people there love you.”

  “I know,” a slight shudder ran through him. “That’s one more reason to stay here.”

  Alice was obviously going to continue arguing when Waldo held up a hand.

  “What?” Alice asked.

  “Someone who can use magic is coming.” Waldo placed a hand on his wand but kept it in his pocket.

  Alice and Belle both moved to stand near the door. There was a single sharp rap. Belle glanced over her shoulder, Waldo nodded. When she opened it, there was a figure in white robes standing there, looking furious.

  Waldo took his wand out and pointed it at her. “Please tell me you’re not here to confess your love again.”

  Melissa stormed into the room without invitation. She pointed to Belle and then to Alice. “You and you out, I want to speak to Waldo alone.”

  “We don’t take orders from you, sweetie.”

  “Why do you want to be alone with him?” Alice demanded.

  “I have important matters to discuss, matters that do not involve a beast or a barmaid.”

  “How did you know where I was staying?” Waldo asked. “I only arrived here a couple hours ago.”

  “The Order has many friends in many places.”

  “Spies you mean,” Waldo grunted.

  “Friends,” Melissa insisted.

  “And I suppose these friends of yours have been following me?”

  “That’s right,
I know what you’ve been up to and I mean to discuss it with you.”

  “Well that sounds like a conversation I’m eager to have,” he nodded to Belle. “Shut the door.”