“The—” I began, but the other guard had returned with a second man in tow. He wore his nightclothes, and a chain was haphazardly placed around his neck. I assumed him to be a member of the queen’s household, though in the dim light I could not get a clear sight of the seal on his chain.
“Come with me. Her Majesty will see you in her chambers,” the new man said. He frowned at me, and I was given the impression he was not pleased to have been woken in the middle of the night. Had I been a clever woman, I would have requested to have the queen come to me, but I did not and followed the stranger instead.
“Thank you, sir, you are most gracious.” I bobbed a bow out of habit and followed him down the hall.
He walked before me at a brisk pace, and instead of heading towards the royal chambers, he opened a hidden door behind a tapestry hung on a wall.
“After you, my lady.” He motioned for me to enter.
The hairs on the back of my neck prickled. Why not take me to her front door? I voiced my concern to the man. “Does the queen not stay near the rest of the royal family?” I asked.
“Her Majesty prefers her privacy. She requested you come through a secret passage,” the man replied.
I glanced back towards the guards. They watched me, both with furrowed brows. Torn between fleeing in hopes of finding another way and the uncertain path, I decided to follow him.
He led me down a dark hallway. He removed a candle from a niche nearby, and the pale light illuminated our path. The rough chiseled walls, cobwebs gathering along the ceiling, and damp smell made me wonder how often this passageway was used. We continued in silence, and I was hard put to repress the growing feeling of unease. Every moment wasted, the king drew a step closer to death and Adair closer to winning his long-game plans. Plans I, as his pawn, had helped come to fruition. I ignored the bitter thought, but it reared its ugly head more than once during that short trip.
The hall ended at a wooden door. The man opened the door for me and stepped aside. Inside, lanterns had been lit and illuminated the room. I spied the corner of a table and a chair but not much else.
“Here you are, my lady,” he said without meeting my gaze.
“The queen is inside?” I asked.
He nodded and motioned once more for me to enter. I stepped inside, and the door slammed shut behind me. Footsteps shifting across the floor revealed that I was not alone. I whirled around and came face to face with the room’s other occupant, and my stomach dropped.
“Maea, you seem disappointed?” Adair purred.
“What are you doing here?” I took a step back, and my back pressed against the door. I searched for the knob and found it locked.
Adair smirked. “I don’t think you’re in a position to be asking questions, Maea.”
How long ago had he killed his uncle in cold blood? Did anyone know? Did anyone suspect? I could feel myself blanching.
We were alone. He took a step towards me, and I paced to the opposite end of the room from him. I was determined to keep as much space between us as possible. Just looking at Adair, I could see King Dallin’s death gaze reflected in his eyes. I shuddered involuntarily.
“What are you doing up at this hour of the night?” he asked as he leaned casually against the table.
I would not meet his gaze. How could he act as if he had not just killed a man in cold blood! “I could not sleep,” I lied. My hands shook, and I thanked the Goddess my voice did not follow suit.
“And you thought to have a chat with the queen in the middle of the night?”
I clutched my shaking hands into fists. There was no use hiding the truth. He would find out in the end anyways, if he had not figured it out already. “Yes, I know what you did. I saw you kill your uncle, King Dallin.”
His expression did not change. “I suspected you knew as much. I should have known when you collapsed at the hand fasting that certain unpleasantness might be revealed.”
He smiled, and it made me feel ill. Had I really once hoped for that smile? Now when I looked into his eyes I saw a conniving murderer.
“You are quick on the uptake,” I said snidely. “I am surprised how quickly you will turn on an ally once they are no longer of use to you.”
Perhaps if I could keep him talking, someone would discover King Dallin’s body and sound the alarm though I feared my prospects locked in this room with the murderer.
Adair also showed no signs of the deed on his person. He must have disposed of his soiled garments already.
“It’s so unlike you to be cruel, Maea. It does not suit you at all.”
I glared at him.
He took a seat in the chair and propped his feet up on the table. “Don’t give me that look. I never pretended to be without faults.”
“Which makes it fair that you killed the king? Why kill him? Because he sought to disinherit you? Does that truly warrant murder?”
“Now that is a complicated question. My uncle was very traditional, you see. He saw things a certain way. Like his uncle and his uncle before him, he chose his sister’s son as his heir. But the winds of change have come to Danhad, and his progressive queen’s whispers got the better of him.”
“What do you mean?” Despite my revulsion, I was curious.
He sighed dramatically. “I guess it’s time you knew all of it, Maea. I have been planning Sabine’s and my marriage for quite some time. With the Order’s and your help, we finally reached our goals.”
I felt as if I was going to be sick. He used me! “You said the Order fought for the greater good, not politicking!”
“And what greater good can there be than universal harmony between our two countries?” He planted his feet on the ground and stared at me.
I wanted to weep from frustration. Everything I knew about Adair was a lie. I grasped for a reason to shout at him. “So you killed your uncle to marry Sabine, why?” I pointed an accusing finger at him.
“Well, he was not so keen on the idea. He did agree in the end, but there were whispers of a change in succession. He did not like the idea of a Neaux queen. I had to sacrifice the pawn, as it were, before he ruined everything I have worked for.”
Damara wanted to put Layton on the throne instead of Adair, and now I knew why: to prevent this, to prevent Adair from taking the throne. The prophecy had been set in motion, and I had been too blind to stop it. I drew back. How had I not seen how ruthless he was? Because I was blinded by his charm, I berated myself.
“How can you be certain the people will accept your queen? They have not forgotten the war.”
“I am sure, but if we were to obtain the rich lands and trading Neaux has to offer with the security of a male heir.”
He was after Neaux all along. Sabine’s father had no male heir. Their son by Neaux succession would be third in line to the throne, after Sabine’s uncle, Sarelle’s former intended. “You plan to take Neaux using Sabine; is that why you had Sarelle killed? This will never work. You’ll start an uprising or even another war!”
He laughed. “Do you truly think me that crass? Honestly, I thought you knew me better than that, Maea.”
I shuddered at the sound of my name on his lips. Even now, after everything I knew, he still had that kind of effect on me.
“I thought you were better than this,” I said.
He stood up and strode over to me. I backed away, but he captured me around the waist.
“You knew what I was, Maea. I’ve never pretended to be anything I am not. I have always been honest.”
I squirmed in his grasp, but he only tightened his grip.
“You tricked me,” I spat.
“I let you believe what you wanted. If you did not know what my goals were, then you should have asked.”
I damned his logic, but it did not justify his actions and I told him as much. “Not lying to me does not justify murder!”
“And does the life of two equal one, Maea? What about thousands? Because if we are going to point fingers, neither your hands nor
my uncle’s are clean.”
I blanched at the memory of Count Braun’s glare as they tied him to the executioner’s block. Adair had struck me in an unhealed wound. “I didn’t kill Count Braun with my own hand!”
“No. But you were the direct cause, and what about Damara and Johai? Their lives are forfeit should they step foot in Danhad, and Layton has been banished from court. How can you claim innocence when so many lives have been ruined because of you? My uncle ordered thousands of men to their deaths, and you think his death was not justified?”
Despite my resistance, his words were like a spell, and I began to doubt my conviction. He was right, a part of me thought, I was no innocent. I had ruined so many lives in my selfish quest to regain my memories, and for what? Johai was banished, and I had not prevented the marriage I had set out to prevent.
Then I thought of Johai and all of the sacrifices he had made, for my sake, and everything came into focus. I pushed Adair on the chest. He seemed unprepared for the action because he stumbled back a step, giving me enough time to put distance between us and face him, shoulders squared.
“Tell me one thing, Adair, why kill him by your hand? Surely you could have someone else do the dirty work.”
“Ah, now that will have to wait until I know where your allegiances lie.”
The smile that curled his lips said it all: he wished for me to condone what he had done. He had deceived me and used my abilities to meet his own ends, and he expected me to look the other way. I had nearly done just that, intoxicated by his sweet charms once again.
“You want me to overlook the king’s murder while you deceive the nations and take control?”
“You always were clever, Maea.” He strode over to me again. I backed into the wall, and he smiled dangerously. “I meant what I said before. I care for you deeply, and I would take good care of you. It is not unheard of for a king to keep a mistress. It is essential that Sabine gives me an heir, but you and I… we could have fun together.”
I could not express my revulsion properly in words. I spat in his face.
He stepped back and wiped the spittle from his face. “I take it you are adverse to the idea.”
“What would make you think that I would desire to be the concubine of a murdering snake!”
“I do not think you understand the consequences of your decision. Either you are for me or against me, Maea.”
There was finality in his tone, and we both knew it. I stood as straight as possible and said, “I would rather die than let you deceive everyone this way.”
I flattened myself against the wall as he leaned in close. I could nearly smell the iron scent of blood on him as he grabbed my chin and upturned my face, forcing me to look him in the eye. Adair’s hand slid down to my throat. I grabbed his wrist and tried to push him off me, but he was prepared this time, and he tightened his grip.
“If that is what you wish, I could kill you now. No one would ask questions. My people love me beyond doubt.”
He tightened his grip upon my windpipe further, and I gasped for breath. I struck him blindly, my fists landing on his arms, and one shot to his cheek. He did not relent. Stars burst behind my eyes as the world swayed. My movements were sluggish, and I struggled to keep my arms up, let alone strike him. This could not be where it ended, not now, not after I had risked it all. It was getting harder and harder to breathe, and each gasp stole a little more of my breath from my lungs.
Adair slackened just a minute amount. “Don’t worry, I won’t kill you, but by the time I’m done, you’ll wish I had.”
Then everything went black.
Chapter Twenty-three
When I awoke, everything hurt. My head throbbed, and my joints ached. A buzzing sound resonated in my ears. Disoriented, I climbed to my knees and scraped them along stone flooring. I cast about my surroundings.
I lived; why not kill me outright? I crawled over to the wooden door once more, my knees and stomach protesting the entire time. My body trembled, and I rested both hands against the rough wood of the door.
Voices murmured outside my door, and I called out. “Hello, is someone out there?”
The voices stopped, and I stayed with my ear pressed against the door, awaiting an answer. The door rattled as a fist came down hard upon it. I lurched back as a gruff voice said, “Shut your mouth in there.”
I dared not press my luck, and I went back to a straw pile in the corner of the room.
I drew my knees up to my chest and stared at a shaft of light coming from the slit window. What was going to happen to me? Stone walls greeted me in all directions. I jumped up, and the room swam. My head pounded, bile rose to my throat, and I emptied the contents of my stomach onto the floor. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. Where am I? I thought.
I stumbled over to a rounded wooden door. A shaft of light invaded through a slit window high up in the wall. I clutched it for support as the realization struck me. I was in the tower. If I stood on my tiptoes, I could see the horizon in the distance and gulls sailing on the wind. This proved to be a poor choice because I lost my balance and fell to the ground with a thud.
A bitter taste remained in my mouth, and I did not think it was only bile. Adair gave me something to keep me unconscious. Why put me in the tower? What did Adair have planned for me? Why did he not just kill me? How could I have miscalculated him? He had played us all for fools. Sabine had doubted him the entire time. Too late, I saw all the signs of mistrust in her carefully worded warnings. Damara, too, had warned me. He had blinded me with his charm, and I was no better than any other woman he had seduced. If I ever got out of here, I would find a way to make it up to both of them.
The door opened, and light spilled into my cell. I blinked into it as a barrel-chested guard stomped in.
I attempted to climb to my feet but found myself too weak to do so. I settled upon kneeling.
“My lord, you must help me. The prince has imprisoned me falsely.”
He laughed low in his throat. “Tha’s wha’ they all say.”
He tossed a bowl of broth onto the ground, spilling half its contents.
“Please, if you will not release me, at least let me send a letter to the queen!”
“Murdering traitors don’ get to make demands.” He turned towards the door to leave.
I scrambled to my feet, using the wall to steady my spinning head. “I am not a traitor, I swear! I have not killed anyone!”
He laughed humorlessly and closed the door. I stared into the darkness long after he had gone.
“Murderer?” I asked the empty cell. That was why he had left me alive, to take the blame for his evil deed?
I spent the next couple of days in solitude, except for two times a day when the guards brought my meals. My guards alternately ignored me or, once, a wiry red-haired guard with missing teeth struck me for demanding once more to speak with the queen. I reeled back, my hand pressed to the irritated flesh.
“Shut your damn mouth!” the guard snarled.
I skittered backwards as he made his way towards me with his fist raised. Presumably, having heard the commotion, the barrel-chested guard burst in and grabbed him about the middle before another blow came.
“Don’t stop me, Torello. That sorceress wench needs to learn her place—mocking me, asking me to speak to the queen on her behalf. She knows damn well the queen has been exiled for treason.”
“Enough,” Torello rumbled.
I trembled as they exited, and they continued their argument outside. Adair had covered his tracks well. Anyone who might have come to my defense was gone. I thought I had known despair before now, but that had only been the beginning. I did not even have the energy to weep. I felt numb. My dinner had been spilled during the tussle, and once I recovered my sense, I made do sopping some bread in the dregs of stew left in my bowl.
A week passed. I had no news of what was happening outside my cell. I wondered endlessly and took every opportunity to question my guards. I even learn
ed their schedules, the barrel-chested guard, Torello, was my morning guard and brought my first meal. The second shift alternated between an older man, who would not look me in the eye when he came to take away my chamber pot or leave my supper, and a young man who did a sign of warding before entering my cell.
The guard that struck me, I never saw again. Torello was the only one who would speak to me, and it was on him I focused my efforts.
“When am I to be tried?”
“Don’ know.”
“What is happening outside?” I gestured towards the door. “I assume Adair is king now, but what of Princess Sabine? Is she well? Is she safe? Have any other prisoners been brought in?”
He paused then and regarded me for a long moment. “Queen Sabine is well. As for other prisoners, there are none in the tower but you.”
It was a small relief. Johai had managed to evade capture. That is, if he had not been killed. I must stay positive, I chastised myself. I sank back down on my straw mattress. “Thank you,” I said.
Torello nodded and left with my empty food bowl.
Three days after that, I heard the bells. I could see nothing but the endless blue sky outside my window, but I imagined the sound was for the coronation of Adair and Sabine. He had won.
After that day, I thought about revenge.
I resolved to break free of my prison and have my vengeance upon Adair. How I could do such a thing, I did not know, but it helped to while away the days of imprisonment. I alternately amused myself by sitting near the door of my cell, hoping to catch the guards gossiping, but either they did not gossip or had the forethought not to do so near my cell, or plotting my escape. I would not ask my guards questions any longer. What did they owe me, someone they thought had killed the king?
Once, I tried asking for pen and parchment so I could document what I knew about Adair’s plot and leave it for someone to find. The answer to my request was a resounding no. I counted the days, and I tried not to think about the unknown or about those I cared for and had hurt with my selfish actions. I just hoped they were safe. Though I did not want them to, my thoughts turned to Johai more than once. I wished I could see him just once more to apologize and tell him that, despite everything, I still loved him. My only consolation was that if I died here, at least I would not be the cause of his demise. It was of little comfort. I continued to wait on a trial that had yet to come.
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