by Dean, Taylor
“Surely Mary has told you everything there is to tell. I think you know more about me than me.” Marisa smiled at the thought of Mary, her foster mother, and Joshua’s aunt. Mary liked to tell anyone who was willing to listen of Marisa’s accomplishments. It was downright embarrassing.
He chuckled. “I admit Mary is rather proud of you, with good reason, as is Jerome. But I want to hear it from you.” He leaned forward in his seat, his gaze direct. There was a lot going on in the crowded restaurant, but his eyes didn’t dart around. His attention was focused solely on her. There he was, sitting across from her; she could reach out and hold his hand if she wanted to—and he wanted to know about her.
Dreams do come true.
Her words gave no hint as to her crazy thoughts. “Pretty boring, really. I spent the last several years at San Jose State, working towards my degree in Elementary Education. I never took a break; attending summer school to get ahead of all that darn general ed., doing my student teaching, earning my credentials, and so on. I spent the last year teaching first grade and I love it, don’t get me wrong. But summer hit this year and I’m burnt out in a big way, ready for a break.”
“Mary said you enjoy being a teacher, but you were a little bit at a loose end.”
“Major life decisions, what to do next, and all that…”
“It’s not easy.” He reached out and covered her hand with his. “But I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”
She nodded, hoping that was the right response. She hadn’t heard a word he’d just said. All she could think about was her hand in his. Their sandwiches came then and he let go of her hand.
“Mary says you’ve wanted to come here for quite some time.”
He painstakingly removed the red onion slices, took a bite of his sandwich, and licked his lips. She was distracted by the action. Stop thinking like a hormone-crazy teenager, Marisa.
“I have. I’ve been unable to convince Mary to go though. Jerome has always wanted to see her childhood home also. Do you want those?” she asked, pointing to his discarded red onion slices.
“Be my guest,” he answered politely.
Marisa piled the red onion onto her sandwich, lathered the bread with an ultra thick layer of mayo and took a big bite. He raised his eyebrows, but didn’t comment. Oh well, he may as well know I like to eat. I’m not going to starve for a man.
“I’m afraid Mary doesn’t have very good memories of the ranch,” Josh continued.
“She doesn’t like to talk about it.”
“Well, I’m glad you decided to come. I can’t tell you how much help you’ll be to me. Bethany is in need of a woman’s touch.”
“Tell me about her.”
“Her mother left when she was only six weeks old,” he said quickly as if he didn’t want to talk about it. “We’re divorced. I’ve divided my time between her and the ranch the best I can. Constance helps me care for her, but she divides her attention between Bethany and all of her other duties. It wears her out.”
“Mary always speaks fondly of Constance. I look forward to meeting her.”
“Constance has been at the ranch since, oh, I guess I was six when she became our housekeeper. It seems as though she’s always been there, I can hardly remember what it was like when she wasn’t. She’s more like family to me. She runs the household with an iron fist and what she says goes. Don’t let her fool you. Underneath the stern exterior is a heart of gold. You’ll love her. I don’t know what I’d do without her. At any rate, back to Bethany. I hired a tutor to home school her for kindergarten. I can’t face sendin’ her away for school. I’d miss her too much. I worry about her, she’s a very quiet child. She doesn’t get out much or see other children much. Honestly, the idea of havin’ you come for the summer is a lifesaver.”
He was a good father and obviously loved his daughter. Marisa sighed out loud. Blue eyes. Jet-black hair. White teeth. Tanned skin. Smile that makes his eyes sparkle. She could sit here all day and simply stare at him.
Then she realized he was waiting for a response. “Are you kiddin’…I mean, kidding?” For heaven’s sake, the accent was rubbing off on her already. Pretend like it didn’t happen, Marisa. “I’ve always wanted to come. This is an opportunity of a lifetime for me. A summer job vacationing on a Texas ranch and playing with Bethany all day—it doesn’t get better than that.” Not to mention getting to see you every day, but I’ll keep that comment to myself.
“Bethany’s gonna love you. She’ll love the constant attention. It will do her good. She gets left to her own devices more than a five year old should,” he added with a frown.
“It’s a dream job. I can’t wait to meet her.”
He finished his sandwich and started in on his chips. She watched him lick the salt from the chips off of his fingers and then looked away feeling silly. Stop it, Marisa.
He leaned forward and spoke softly as he asked, “How old were you when Mary and Jerome took you in? Ten?”
She leaned in a little closer. “No, eleven. My parents passed away unexpectedly.” He held her hand again and squeezed it softly.
“Old enough to remember them,” he stated, not questioned.
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry, I can tell you don’t want to talk about it. Mary has told me so little.”
“I’ve always appreciated Mary’s discretion. No one ever knew my story. I liked it that way. I didn’t want kids to be friends with me just because they felt sorry for me.” With their heads together, speaking softly, and holding hands, she wondered if they looked like lovers. Concentrate, Marisa, for goodness sake. “I don’t mind talking about it, but it’s a real downer.”
His eyes searched hers for a moment. “I understand.” He changed the subject. “It killed Mary when she was given the news that she couldn’t have children. She was thrilled when you came to live with her.”
“The feeling is mutual. I don’t know what would’ve happened to me without Mary.”
“My mother left when I was only three. Mary was in her early twenties at the time and in many ways took the place of my mother. I hardly think of her as an aunt, she’s been much more of a mother figure to me over the years. I wish she’d come for a visit, but, as I said, the ranch holds too many bad memories for her. She swore she’d never come back. My dad, her brother, was always hard on her. They didn’t get along. I knew that and recognized it even at a young age.” He spoke softly, telling her more in thirty seconds than Mary ever had.
Not knowing what to say, Marisa simply nodded, keeping her face blank. Marisa didn’t know about Joshua’s mother leaving him. How sad.
“Can I ask you something?” Josh queried.
“You just did,” Marisa responded cheekily.
His face was blank till he caught on to her remark. “Smart aleck,” he guffawed. “A smart aleck firecracker. Mary was right.” He laughed aloud.
“What did you want to ask?” Marisa asked in all seriousness, the sound of his laughter echoing in her mind.
“Was your life happy with your real parents?”
“Yes.” Marisa felt uncomfortable. Why all the questions?
He perceived her discomfort. “I’m sorry, I just realized that I really don’t know much about you and I had a sudden overwhelming curiosity to know everything there is to know about this beautiful creature who sits before me and who will be livin’ in my home and takin’ care of my daughter.”
Marisa ran her hand through her hair self-consciously feeling flustered at his words. He’d called her beautiful.
“I didn’t mean to give you the third degree.”
She blushed, knowing she’d overreacted. Talking about her past always made her uncomfortable. “You didn’t, really. I…”
“Perhaps we started out on the wrong foot. Can we start over?”
“Sure.”
He held out his hand, implying that she should shake it. She grasped his hand as he said in his best West Texan accent, “Hi, I’m Joshua Kensington. Welcome to Texas.”
“Hi, I’m Marisa Michaels and I love your accent.” Not to mention everything else about you.
Marisa glanced at their hands clasped together and felt her heart begin to beat a little faster. This was more than she had expected.
To hide the fact that she felt flustered, Marisa turned the tables on him. “So tell me about yourself, Joshua Kensington, I hardly know anything about you,” she said mischievously. “And I’d like to know everything. After all, I’m going to be living in your home and taking care of your daughter…”
Joshua again laughed. He had an easy laugh. She realized then that he was a naturally happy person. She didn’t know that about him. She’d always thought of him as the tall, dark, handsome Texan, brooding, intense, and mysterious, a man of few words. She liked the real Joshua so much better than her imaginary Joshua. Her imagination had failed her there. He was so vibrant and alive. She couldn’t wait to see the different facets of his personality. A little thrill of anticipation ran through her. It was going to be a good summer.
“What do ya wanna know?” he drawled.
“All about the ranch. From the very beginning.”
“All right, let’s see…my great-great grandfather was the founder. That was back in eighteen-ninety-six. He turned the enterprise into a very successful cattle ranch. With the advent of the railroad Amarillo had become a huge shippin’ point for cattle. People as far as England flocked to participate in the budding cattle business and my great-great grandfather and his son were a part of it. They immigrated here from England to try and make a go of it. It’s been handed down from father to son ever since. When my father passed away about six years ago, the ranch became mine. How’s that for the very beginnin’?”
“Perfect. I can’t wait to see the ranch.” Or to see you every day. She told her subconscious to shut up. Really, she could hardly concentrate. He was going to think she was a complete ditz.
“Enough about me. How about some dessert?”
They each ordered a milkshake and when the tall, frosty glasses arrived, Josh toasted her and said, “To a wonderful and excitin’ summer…”
“To summer…” she said as their eyes held.
–2–
After a two-hour drive, they turned onto a tree-lined road with a large metal archway overhead bearing the name, “Kensington Ranch.” Several minutes passed before they reached the main house. There was a long driveway framed by a large expanse of neatly trimmed grass. Marisa’s eyes scanned the old-fashioned, Victorian style home. It was absolutely charming with its huge wrap-around porch and black-shuttered windows. Through the white lacy drapes lining the bay windows you could see the lights on inside—hurricane lamps and chandeliers. It was inviting, welcoming.
Josh cut the engine, but neither one of them made a move to leave the jeep. “I had the house completely restored a couple of years ago. I tried to stay true to the time period. My great-great grandfather and his son built this home. I couldn’t bear to tear it down, even though that’s what everyone recommended. I’m glad I held my own over the matter. It was worth every moment of the pain staking restoration.”
“Will you give me a tour?”
Marisa listened raptly and hung on every word. Josh was enthusiastic over the renovations in his home. She watched the expressions on his face and the motions of his hands as he spoke animatedly.
She’d been in love with him all of her life, okay, since eleven, but that was practically all of her life. Her thoughts sobered and all humor left. Her thoughts wandered to one of her first nights in Mary’s home. She remembered feeling scared and alone, even though they were wonderful to her. She remembered wandering into the dimly lit hallway dotted with framed family pictures. She remembered the way she’d felt the first time her eyes had rested upon Joshua.
Warm, he makes me feel warm. Then and now.
Unbeknownst to Mary, Marisa had slept with the picture of Joshua—given to her on that cold and lonely night—under her pillow from that time forward, even to the present day. The image of Josh had created a calming effect within her and helped her through a trying time in her life. Over the years, she’d never been able to give up the habit of keeping him close. He’d come to represent security in her mind.
At the present moment, it suddenly dawned on her that this really was someone she could fall in love with—not just a silly childhood crush—a detail she hadn’t come to terms with as yet.
They’d only just met as adults, equals. He was the nephew of the woman who had taken her in at the age of eleven, and Mary was her mother for all intents and purposes. But Josh, only three years her senior, was the handsome prince of her dreams, her imaginary companion through long, sleepless, lonely nights. And so far he was living up to the ideal she’d created in her overactive imagination. Her older adult self simply hadn’t expected such nonsense to be real.
Marisa shook her head and came back to the present, concentrating on Josh’s words.
Quit being silly, Marisa.
The downstairs section of the Victorian style home consisted of a kitchen, modern and updated, a breakfast nook, a formal living room with amazing bay windows lined with stained glass, a large dining room, a family room with a huge stone fireplace, and a large picture window. Josh explained that this was where they spent most of their family time. Next was a movie room that boasted a large screen television and seating for at least ten on a huge wrap around couch. Josh also had an office downstairs, as well as a large bedroom with a connecting bath for Constance.
They stood at the bottom of the stairs as she met Constance for the first time. She was a huge cuddly bear of a woman, yet looked strong as an ox, with large gray eyes that bored right through Marisa as if she could read her thoughts. Her hair had been dyed a deep brown and hid how old she really was. She wasn’t someone who smiled much, but when she did, she meant it and it transformed her face. Marisa liked her immediately. While she was the housekeeper, clearly she was also the mother figure of the home. Constance surprised her with a big bear hug and a few tears while mumbling something about how much she missed Mary. Marisa was touched and hugged her back with equal emotion.
“Watch out for this one,” Constance told her, glancing at Josh. “The stories I could tell you about him, the little whippersnapper. But I guess he’s gone and grown up well in spite of it all.” She winked at Josh, her affection towards him obvious.
“I want to hear every single story, don’t leave out any details,” Marisa coaxed.
Josh protested to that. “Two can play at this game you know. I’ll just call Mary and get the dirt on you.”
Their eyes met and held. “Joshua Kensington, there is no dirt on me. I was the perfect child, an absolute angel.”
He took a step closer. “Really, we’ll just see what Mary has to say about that.”
“You wouldn’t…”
He took another step, even closer. “Try me.”
“You don’t play fair, do you?”
“Not when my sterling reputation is at stake,” he said, his eyes flashing.
“Believe me, I’ll be hanging on every word I hear about you.”
“You don’t really want to know about all that,” he said in a ‘you are getting very, very sleepy’ tone, as if he could hypnotize her.
“I think I do.”
“I guess I’ll just have to sidetrack you, Marisa Michaels.”
“And how will you do that? I’m not easily sidetracked.”
“I’ll find a way, rest assured.”
“I’m waiting and filled with anticipation,” she teased.
“I’m warnin’ you, you won’t wait long.”
“Good, cuz patience is not my virtue.”
“I’m more concerned with vice.”
“Right back at ya,” Marisa told him with attitude.
“I have my ways of making Mary talk.”
“You may be sorely disappointed.”
“Somehow I doubt that,” Josh told her with eyes that glinted.
Constance bustled off, chuckling at their banter, and saying the word, ‘whippersnapper’ under her breath.
Marisa found herself feeling slightly breathless after the exchange. She hadn’t expected to feel so…comfortable around him.
Just then a high, breathy voice, so soft they barely heard it said, “Daddy?” Josh and Marisa turned as the tiny little girl slowly climbed down the stairs, her eyes watching each step she made, her little hands gripping the railing as if she was scared of falling.
Joshua’s demeanor changed completely. “Bethany…” he said in a quiet voice filled with affection. He met her at the bottom of the stairs and picked her up into his arms, making her look even smaller. Her femininity only served to accentuate Josh’s masculinity. “Hi sweetheart, did you have a good nap?” He spoke kindly in a tone that was meant for a small child. Bethany nodded. He kissed her forehead and said, “Come and meet Marisa, she’s excited to see you.” Josh set her down as Marisa knelt on the floor, placing her at Bethany’s level. Bethany approached tentatively.
Marisa fell in love with her immediately. She had the blondest hair she’d ever seen, it was almost white. Her eyes were large and bright blue—Joshua’s eyes. She was tiny for her age, her movements slow and shy. She was thin, a little wisp of a child. Her breathy voice, utterly female, said, “Hi, Marisa.” Marisa’s heart swelled in her chest. She looked like a little porcelain doll. She wore a pink sundress and pink sandals to match. “My favorite color is pink.” She spoke clearly and perfectly, totally at odds with her outward appearance.
“Hi, Bethany. I’m happy to meet you. I like pink too. We’re going to have so much fun together this summer.”
Bethany’s eyes lit up and she smiled. To Marisa’s surprise, she wrapped her little arms around her and hugged tightly. Marisa picked her up and Bethany latched onto her, seemingly content to be held. Marisa stood, holding the feather light child in her arms. She seemed to weigh almost nothing. Bethany rested her head on her shoulder and buried her face from sight. Marisa was touched at the affection and rested her cheek to the top of her head. She was overwhelmed with the feeling of love that coursed through her. Josh was right. Bethany was in need of a woman’s touch, a mother’s touch. Marisa looked up to find Josh watching them intently. They smiled at each other.