by Melvin, Jim
The arroyo eventually spilled off the side of the mesa, descending upon a lower range of flat land. By nightfall, they had left the dreaded highlands behind and were within sight of the western border of Barranca.
Tāseti could not have been more pleased. It would take their slow-moving band a week to cross the rocky wasteland, but they would have little to fear while doing so. And beyond Barranca lay the desert.
Her beloved Tējo was so close she could taste it.
AT THE CAMP that night, Sister Tathagata felt strangely lightheaded—and she had never been so thirsty. Though none of the ordinary Tugars dared chastise her, Tāseti found the courage to complain about her excessive consumption of water. But Tathagata couldn’t stop herself. The evening after they’d left the haven, her mouth had become constantly dry, more so even than the exertions of the journey should have demanded. She became concerned that she was coming down with a fever, which would make the march to Anna far more difficult. She found a quiet place on the rim of the camp and tried to meditate. Normally, she would be able to view her discomforts with detached concentration, watching them rise and fall in wave upon wave of impermanence. But this thirst was different.
When she watched her breath, it only made it worse. She found herself literally sneaking behind Tāseti’s back to drink. She noticed several others doing the same, their normally placid faces flushed and agitated. Did she look that way, too? Sister Tathagata, the Perfect One? This was the kind of behavior for which she had lectured others. Never before had she felt so out of control.
The Tugars gave them bread, dates, and berries. She ate mindfully but did not enjoy the small meal. She would have preferred the stew with the sardines. This time, she would have eaten the fish along with the broth.
After feeding the monks and nuns, Tāseti, Rati, and the desert warriors had roasted a bighorn sheep they had brought down earlier that day with a bead from a sling. The warriors were tearing into it with gusto, relishing the greasy meat and washing it down with Tugarian wine.
The High Nun stood silently off to the side and watched, her mouth watering. She almost felt like she could take a bite herself, an especially juicy bite—and she hadn’t eaten the flesh of an animal since she was a child almost three thousand years ago.
To somehow quench her newfound desires, she snuck over to the water-skins and drank until her stomach bloated. Then she staggered to her tent and slept. The nuns by her side smelled like raw meat.
Lucius’ Transformation
44
“HOW FAR to Jivita?” Lucius said to Bonny as they huddled together beneath the stars on the border of the forest Dhutanga, still only a couple of leagues south of where the druids had ambushed them earlier that day. They did not dare a fire.
Bonny lay on her side and placed her head on his lap. “I have never been to the White City, but I know the maps. It’s close to eighty leagues. With the Daasa wandering about as much as they do, it could take two weeks or more.”
“The druids will easily reach the White City before us, if that’s their desire—though it’s probable they’ll wait until Nissaya is under siege before they attack Jivita. But I can’t help but worry about Laylah and the others. What hope do we have of ever seeing them alive?”
“I believe the great wizard will save Missus Laylah. And if they can escape to the river, they will be in Jivita long before us.”
Lucius looked down at her face and stroked her short red hair. “I hope you’re right.”
The corners of Bonny’s mouth turned downward. “Do you love Missus Laylah?”
Lucius smiled. “Yes. But don’t worry, not in that way . . . anymore. I’ve fallen in love with someone else.”
Her face brightened. “Me?”
“No . . . Ugga.” Then he laughed, leaned down, and kissed her on the mouth.
The next morning, while the Daasa grazed, Lucius focused his attention on Ugga and Bard. Something about their behavior seemed odd. They were more sluggish than before, which was understandable considering everything they had been through the past several weeks. But they also acted as if they were as sore and stiff as worn-out old men. Come to think of it, they looked older, their beards flecked with gray. Had they been that way before?
After their encounter with the druids, Bonny, Ugga, and Bard wanted to head toward the foothills of the Mahaggatas, thereby staying as far from the forest as possible. But Lucius argued against it.
“For one thing, I don’t think the druids are much interested in us anymore,” he said. “For another, the Daasa always seem hungry, so we need to keep them near a steady supply of food. There’ll be more here on the edge of the forest than in the foothills. And we’ve reached a point where we’ll need to start fending for ourselves, even if it’s just wild berries, like Elu said.”
“I wishes the little guy was here with us now,” Ugga said. “I misses him.”
“I misses all of them,” Bard said. “Especially Jord.”
In low spirits, they began the tedious march toward the White City. The Daasa, however, seemed anything but downcast, charging about frenetically, climbing trees, tearing through shrubs, and splashing in streams. When they came upon large ponds, the Daasa squealed with delight and dove in by the hundreds. Lucius was amazed to see that they were excellent swimmers, almost more comfortable in water than on land. He wondered what they would do if they encountered a lake the size of Hadaya. How far and deep would they swim? And how long could they stay submerged? Lucius wished he could see for himself.
“The Daasa are cutesy,” Bard said. “But they make loud noises that scare everything away. Pretty soon, we’ll need to hunt. Maybe Ugga and I should go on ahead and see if we can get us something.”
“I’ve been thinking about that too,” Lucius said. “But I’m worried about how the Daasa will react if they see us eating a dead animal. As far as I can tell, they feed on only nuts, berries, and leaves.”
“Only when they are in their nicey state,” Bonny said. “When they turn mean, they eat almost anything. I have seen it up close . . . very close.”
“We have to eat,” Ugga said. “And more than just berries. I don’t know about ya guys, but I is not feeling so good. I needs something hot in my tummy so that I can get strong again. I is so hungry . . . I thinks I smell something cooking right now.”
“Me too,” Bard said.
“So do I,” Lucius said. “It can’t be all our imaginations.”
Without warning, Bard and Ugga took off in the direction of the delicious aroma, though the handsome trapper was limping, and the crossbreed was as hunched over as Rathburt. The Daasa charged after them, squealing and whistling in their peculiar manner.
Bonny shrugged. “Let’s go see what it is. If it tastes half as good as it smells, then I’m all for it.”
They approached a broad hill. Despite their new infirmities, Bard and Ugga were the first to surmount and then disappear over the crest. The Daasa poured after them, kicking up a cloud of grass and dust. Lucius jogged and then ran—and still he was losing ground. Even Bonny was outdistancing him.
“Come on,” she shouted back at him. “Run!”
Then Bonny disappeared, and for a few disconcerting moments, Lucius was alone, as if his companions had vanished from the world. When he finally reached the top of the hill, he stopped and stared down. At its base, a dozen oaks—huge and ancient—encircled a longhouse. A trail of white smoke poured from a hole in its roof. Apparently, Bard and Ugga already were inside, while Bonny was charging toward the door. The Daasa, meanwhile, lay outside the cabin like well-trained pets waiting patiently on their masters.
Lucius panicked. How have you gotten so far ahead? “Wait!” he screamed. “We don’t know who’s there. Wait!”
And then Bonny was gone also. Lucius stumbled down the hill, shouting and cursing. But he didn’t seem able to make any progress.
What’s happening? Where am I? His face was hot and swollen, his vision blurred. Rage and turmoil consumed his th
oughts.
And the pain . . . such terrible pain.
Such angry pain.
Such sweet pain.
Then darkness.
WHEN LUCIUS woke inside the small room, it really was dark, but a merry fire blazed a few paces from his mattress, which smelled like pine needles. For the first time since Duccarita, he noticed that his magically healed arm no longer throbbed. Bonny sat beside him, caressing his brow with a damp cloth. He bolted upright, his eyes wild.
“Shhhhhh! Shhhhhhhhhh!” she said soothingly. “Lay back, sweety. Everything is all right now, though you had us worried. It was Jord who finally found you and helped us bring you back here, safe and sound. Where did you think you were going? You were wandering around the woods like a madman.”
“Jord . . . the eagle-woman? I thought the dragon killed her.”
Bonny laughed. “If he did, then a ghost is taking care of us now.”
Lucius sat up again, more deliberately this time, and looked around the room. In addition to the hearth, he saw a roughly hewn table, several chairs, and some small barrels by the door. Otherwise the chamber was empty, as if whoever lived here did so sparingly.
“Where is everyone?”
Bonny laughed again. “They are outside with the Daasa. Do you want to go see? I think Jord wants to talk to you, anyway. She seems to think you are important or something. I can’t imagine why.”
Bonny leaned forward and gave him a wet kiss on the mouth that tasted like beer. Then she leaped up and rushed to the door. “Come on, sleepyhead. There’s some good eating out here—the food’s still hot. And some good drinking too—the beer’s still cold.”
Lucius remained confused. When he stood up, he felt nauseated and dizzy but determined to follow. Bonny had left the door ajar, and he pushed it slowly open. About fifty paces away, a skinned and spitted deer was suspended above a crackling fire. Bard and Ugga stood next to it, drinking with gusto from large pewter mugs. Beside them was a woman with long white hair that hung past her waist. She wore a white gown that nearly matched the color of her skin.
“Master Loo-shus!” Ugga bellowed. “Come and have some beer. It is ex-cell-lent. I had almost forgotten how much I loves it. And we roasted a deer while ya were sleeping. We’ve eaten a lot of it, but don’t worry, there’s plenty left.”
Jord turned to him. When she spoke, her voice was strong and clear. “You are safe in the house of Jord. Now is the time to build your strength for the difficult times ahead.”
Ugga handed him a mug of beer.
Lucius sniffed it, almost suspiciously, and then took a sip. Not since the inn at Duccarita had he tasted anything so delicious.
Ugga and Bard were already several mugs ahead of him—Bonny, too, for that matter. The pirate woman gave him a wooden trencher with chunks of sizzling venison, white cheese, boiled cabbage, and stewed berries. He picked at it with his fingers, amazed to discover that he wasn’t particularly hungry. But he was thirsty and soon downed second and third helpings of beer. The others watched him with amusement, their eyes sparkling in the firelight.
Finally he quit drinking long enough to speak. “Where are the Daasa?”
“They are just a little ways away, fast asleep,” Bonny said. “They ate too many of the young berries, I think. It made them drunk and tired.”
“I must be a Daasa because I is drunk and tired too,” Ugga said. “I thinks I will go inside the cabin and lie down.”
“I’ll join ya,” Bard said.
Bonny yawned. “I must be a Daasa too,” she said to Lucius. “Would you mind if I went with the boys, sweety? Just to sleep, I mean. I promise I will behave myself.”
“I trust you,” Lucius said.
“A little jealousy would be nice,” she said, before leaning down and kissing him on the cheek. Then she staggered to the cabin, barely making it inside the door. After she was gone, Lucius looked up at Jord, whose hair swirled as if in the midst of a magical maelstrom.
“I thought you were dead,” he said at last.
“Dead? Alive? I am neither.”
“I don’t know what that means. Who are you, really?”
“I am a friend . . . to you and the others. Will you walk with me?”
“Where? Why?”
“There is something I must show you. Do you not trust me?”
“I neither trust nor distrust you.”
Lucius stood and brushed off his breeches. It was only then that he noticed he was wearing a different outfit than before he arrived at the cabin. “What happened to my clothes? And where did you find these new ones?”
“You ask many questions, firstborn.”
“That’s what Torg always says. And—like you—he gives me few answers.”
Jord threw back her head and laughed. It was a rich and pleasant sound. “Sometimes the wise don’t answer because it takes too long to explain all that they know. But we must delay no longer. The night grows old. After what you’ve been through, you need sleep even more than the others.”
“After what I’ve been through?”
Jord took his hand and led him into the dark forest. The gibbous moon glowed in a clear sky, providing enough light to see for about a hundred paces. The Daasa were all around him. Though they were quite large, even in their gentle state, many of them had managed to climb into the trees and were asleep in the branches.
Then Lucius stopped and gasped. A few paces from where he stood, the trunk of a thick pine had been split in two near the base, splinters of wood jutting skyward. The upper portion of the tree had been dragged more than a stone’s throw away. And beyond that, there was more damage: other trees gashed and scarred, bushes uprooted and shredded, and most disturbingly, a Tyger the size of a mountain wolf mangled and partially devoured. Lucius stared in dismay, especially at the ruined carcass of the wild cat. What could have done such a thing? And would it return?
“I don’t . . . understand,” Lucius said. “Why are you showing me this? Shouldn’t we go back and warn the others? Something this dangerous could harm even the Daasa.”
“What makes you so sure the Daasa didn’t do this? You’ve seen what they’re capable of. Yet it did not even enter your mind?”
He slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand. “You’re right, you’re right . . . of course it was them. When they saw the Tyger, they must have transformed and killed it.”
Jord shook her head. “Your first inclination was correct, firstborn. It was not the Daasa. Do you not remember?”
“Remember what? This?”
Jord did not answer, but her eyes glowed green. She walked over to the broken tree and pulled something off it . . . a torn piece of cloth.
“Do you not remember?” she repeated.
There was something; he couldn’t deny it. He was running. Feeling lost. And then pain. And a blazing rage.
Jord placed her hand on his shoulder, startling him. “You were born of the Daasa. Their flesh is your flesh. Their way is your way.”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“I think you do.”
Lucius backed away from her . . . slowly.
“Listen, nothing like this has happened before. I’ve been angry many times in my life. And afraid, too. If you’re saying what I think you’re saying . . . why now?”
“The Mahanta pEpa no longer exists,” Jord explained. “But even that is not the true reason it has taken so long for your first transformation. That being’s power had little effect on you. Instead, it is your recent proximity to so many of the Daasa that has awakened a part of you that before had lain dormant.”
Lucius became so dizzy, it was a struggle to stay on his feet. “Then . . . I’m a monster?”
“You were born of the Daasa . . . a creation of great magic. Are you a monster or a miracle? That will be for you to decide.”
Lucius lowered his head. Tears fell from his eyes. “What about Bonny? She’s falling in love with me . . . and I with her. What will she do when she finds out ab
out . . . this?”
“She already knows. She saw.”
“She saw?”
Jord nodded.
“She saw me change?”
Jord continued to nod.
“And she wasn’t sickened?”
“Do not underestimate her. She is strong. There is a reason she has grown to love you so quickly. For you see, she is also not fully human.”
Lucius’ jaw dropped. He could think of nothing else to say.
Jord smiled compassionately. “This is enough for one night. We all have endured sorrows. The mountain eagles are dead. What could be worse than that? Return with me to the cabin and sleep without fear. Over the coming days, there’ll be plenty of time to talk—for I will be with you. At least for a time. If it is within my power, I will see you safely to Jivita.”
45
THE MORNING after his transformation, Lucius still wasn’t hungry. While Bonny and the others gorged on deer meat, blackberries, white cheese, and brown bread, Lucius wandered back into the woods to study the destruction in daylight.
The Daasa followed him, almost ten thousand in all, squealing and leaping about excitedly in his presence. Lucius ignored them, concentrating on the task ahead. The carcass of the Tyger had been dragged away, presumably by something large. Another Tyger? A bear? One of his own Daasa?
Lucius walked over to the trunk of the tree that had been split in two. How much strength would it take to perform such a feat? Far more than he contained. Or believed he contained. Now he was no longer sure. If Jord’s assertions were correct, a beast lurked within him that could knock down trees and kill Tygers with its bare hands. If so, he really was like the Daasa. The thought filled him with horror—but a part of him was tantalized. While living in Avici, he had been pushed around far too often. Did the monster within give him powers that would enable him to seek revenge?