“I’ll just have to trust you on that one.” He sighed. “The stuff’s actually in my locker. I just wanted him gone.” He stood up and unlocked the locker, pulling out a small box. “It’s just some clothes, some books she was reading, and some of Gabe’s toys. Nothing that interesting.”
“You never know. Thank you,” I said, taking the box.
He frowned as I took it. “I was going to ask her to marry me, you know. Bought the ring and everything.” He was quiet for a moment, his normally joyful face contorted with sadness. “I wish it was me, you know? I’d give my life to have her standing here. Just the thought of not having her laugh at one of my stupid jokes is too much. I feel like I’m in hell.” He paused. “Does it ever go away? The pain?”
“No. It just…becomes more bearable. Or maybe you just get used to it; I don’t know. But it never leaves you. Not even for a day.”
He nodded slowly. “He loved you, you know? From the moment he saw you. He came to me the next day and said, ‘Chuck, I met the woman I’m gonna spend the rest of my life with last night. And she is…brilliant.’ You made him so proud. So happy. He never stopped loving you. Not for a second. Even though…” He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t even look at me. “I thought something was going on between you and Luke,” Chuck confessed. “I saw how comfortable you were together. How he looked at you. Hayden just wouldn’t believe it.”
“It only happened once,” I said, “and I regretted it the second it did.”
“I know; I heard everything. I was surprised it was only the once. From the way he looked at you all those years, I thought for sure it had been going on longer. I just thank God Hayden never found out.” He sighed. “It took me a while to forgive you, but he would have wanted me to.”
“You have no idea what that means to me.”
He just nodded. “I miss him. He was my best friend for twelve years. First him, and now…” He wiped the tears away again. “When you catch this prick I want you to give him a message from me.”
“What?”
“Tell him he’d better pray he never gets out. Because if he does, I’ll be there. Waiting.”
A nurse walked in, breaking the tense mood. “Dr. Winkler, you’re needed in Trauma Two.”
“I’ll be there in a second.”
The nurse closed the door, leaving us alone again. “I have to go,” I said. I stood from the table and took the box. “Thank you. I promise I’ll keep you posted on our progress.”
“Thank you.” He paused to give me a sad smile. “You have a good life, Iris.” Then he walked out of the room.
I took a deep breath, letting it out slowly before leaving myself. That went better than I ever could have hoped for.
Luke was already in the car when I got in. His usually unreadable face was scrunched up with impatience. I shut the door and just sat there, waiting for him to say something. He didn’t. Guess it was up to me. “Care to tell me—”
“It’s nothing,” he said. “He’s still upset about the fact that I had to question him. Two of my men had to subdue him when he tried to attack me in the interrogation room. It was…I was surprised when he called me this morning.”
“Yeah, well, it was a tough situation. For all of us.”
“Are you okay? I mean, he didn’t…He wasn’t…What’d he say?”
“He forgives me.”
Luke nodded. “I’m glad. For your sake.” He cleared his throat. “So, anything interesting in the box?”
I opened it. Inside was a pair of blue jeans, five shirts of various colors, a few action figures, two books, and a pair of sneakers. I pulled out one of the books, Live in the Now, and flipped through it. The receipt fell out, and I put it back where it was. “I never pegged Justine for a self-help type of person,” I said, reading about “Step Six: Acceptance of Your Second Chance.”
Luke glanced at the book. “That one’s actually not that bad.”
My mouth gaped open. “You’ve read it?” I asked, totally dumbfounded that stable, sane Luke would even give a book like this a second look.
“Parts. Basically it teaches you that the past can’t be changed, and you should just move on with life.”
“Whatever,” I muttered while closing the book.
“Half of America’s read it. It’s been on the bestseller list for months.”
I scoffed. “So was Twilight.” I put the book back in the box. “You really believe that shit? About living in the now?”
“I believe we shouldn’t dwell too much on what we can’t change,” he said pointedly.
“You mean I shouldn’t?”
“You can kill yourself with all your ‘what ifs.’ What if you hadn’t joined the FBI? What if you never met Hayden? Would he still be alive?”
“Your point?” I snapped.
“The point is that you did all those things. They can’t be taken back. So why think about them?”
“Because all those things made me who I am today. My mistakes shaped me, and they teach me, even now. They’re a part of my life, a huge part, and to totally discount them is idiotic.”
“We’ll just have to agree to disagree.”
“Whatever.” He started the car and pulled out. I folded my arms across my chest. “And second chances are few and far between. If we’re ever lucky enough to get one, we always manage to screw it up.”
He was silent, then said, “I hope for both our sakes you’re wrong on that.”
So did I.
It was the waiting I couldn’t bear. Not when they hurt me as they attempted to fight back, not even when it was all over and I knew it could be weeks before I would feel that bliss again. No, it was the hours before, when she was so close and I could not go to her. I couldn’t touch her, feel her under me, and yet there she was, walking out of her office building, chatting on her cellphone to the nanny about the children. It took all my considerable willpower not to climb out of the car and take her that instant. But that would not be wise, and I was nothing if not wise. Willpower and an astute mind were what separated the greats from the plebeians. She unlocked her car door and got in. Off to lunch and away from me. I hope she enjoyed it. It would be her last.
I took the respite to check my supplies. In the case resting on the passenger seat were six syringes filled with thiopental sodium. On the floor in a black duffel bag were leather gloves, twelve feet of rope, four metal stakes, a surgical saw, a scalpel, and water. I got parched after each session, as one does with vigorous activity.
As I stowed the bag, her car pulled back into the lot a few spaces down from mine. She must have forgotten something, sadly not unusual. My beauty was scatterbrained on occasion. I pulled down my cap as she walked past, oblivious to everything but her phone conversation. Her brown hair swung in perfect unison with her small hips. I could just imagine them naked and writhing under me as I rode her like a mustang. I grew hard just thinking about it. My hand touched the door handle, but I forced it away. Now was not the time…
Soon.
Chapter 9
The rest of my day was spent in a windowless, gray box with low lighting, going through close to a thousand files consisting of suicides, rapes, assaults, and murders from New York State, Pittsburgh, and Philadelphia. These were women from all walks of life who were strangled, drugged, found in the woods, or dumped in water. Nothing really struck me as our guy. At four, after close to nine hours in my box, I decided to take a break. I hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Luke since we arrived back at HQ, so I left a note on his desk telling him I returned to the hotel.
The moment I stepped into my room, I peeled off my clothes to take a luxurious bath. The water was close to scalding, just the way I liked it. As I soaked, my thoughts fell to Hayden and his suspicions. I never knew he had any, though I couldn’t say that I was surprised. Whenever Luke would come over, Hayden did get distant. They’d never had more than a two-minute conversation in all those years. I knew others believed the rumors. I heard the whispered tones as I walked down
the hall, and saw the sideways glances as we sat with our heads together huddled over crime scene reports. It was only natural to assume a man and a woman who worked so closely together might be interested in something other than cases, especially since it was more by choice. We were never officially partners, but Luke and I always seemed to gravitate toward each other, even at the Academy. I just wished Hayden had been spared such thoughts. It must have been hell for him those nights I worked late with Luke. I knew he was resentful that at least ten of my hours were spent with another man and the rest were spent sleeping—how could he not be? But I knew he understood. I knew he trusted me. And I made a fool of him.
I climbed out of the bath and cooled off by lying naked on my bed. The breeze from the air conditioner wafted over my naked flesh, giving me goose bumps. Heavenly. My eyes seemed to close on their own. This triggered my whole body to relax one muscle at a time. I couldn’t remember being so tired in my life. I didn’t even get under the covers; I just curled into a ball and fell asleep.
The next thing I knew, a pounding pulled me out of my blissful state. “Iris, open up,” Luke said on the other side of the door. I leapt up from the bed, still a little groggy. I looked down at my naked body and grabbed the sheet off the bed, wrapping it around me as I opened the door. Luke stood in the hall, his mouth a straight line. Without a word, he pushed past me into the room. “Get dressed,” he said without looking at me.
“What time is it?” I asked.
“Three.”
“In the morning?” I’d been asleep since seven, over eight hours. I hadn’t slept that long in two years. No nightmares, either. Wow.
Luke turned toward me. “Get dressed,” he repeated.
“Why?”
“There’s a woman missing in Richmond,” he said.
Oh, shit. “Fit his type?”
“To a T.”
“How long has she been missing?”
“Reported to police about three hours ago. She failed to come home at nine to relieve the nanny. FBI in Richmond knew she fit our victim typology and called.”
“Shit,” I said under my breath.
“We’re on the first train out of Union in twenty minutes.”
“I’ll get dressed.” I picked up my clothes from the floor and went into the bathroom to change. I was dressed in a flash and threw all my things into my toiletry bag, checking the bathroom to make sure I got everything. I came out of the bathroom and tossed the bag into my suitcase. I reached under my pillow and pulled out my gun, sticking it in my purse.
I expected a lecture about permits and safety, but Luke was too busy on his cellphone. “Has a bulletin been sent out to all the state and national parks yet?” he asked. “Good, for once the state police are on the ball. Have them report anything out of the ordinary directly to us; I don’t care if it’s two teenagers making out. I want to know everything, got it?” He shut the phone angrily, muttering to himself. I was folding up my pants as he turned to me. “Are you ready yet?”
I zipped up the suitcase. “Ready.”
He grabbed my suitcase before walking quickly out of the room with me five paces behind. He pushed the elevator button three times in frustration. “Come on,” he muttered.
“That isn’t helping.” The elevator doors opened and we stepped in. He pressed the button before I could. “You need to calm down.”
“I just didn’t expect him to strike so soon,” he said.
“Neither did I. I thought we had at least another week.”
“At least Richmond was on the ball and caught it in time for us to actually be able to save this one.”
The doors opened and we stepped out. Without a word, an awaiting agent took my suitcase and gestured to the main door. We hurried out to a waiting black SUV at the curb. Before I could close my door, it was on the move. We were at Union Station in a matter of minutes, racking up a dozen moving violations along the way. As we stepped into the station, another agent ran over to us and handed two tickets to Luke. “Gate D,” he said.
Luke nodded, and we both ran through the empty station, barely making the train. A car must have been reserved for the FBI because we had it entirely to ourselves, and we had taken full advantage of the fact. Maps of the Richmond area on tack boards covered the main wall. A conference table stood in the center of the car cluttered with suit jackets and papers. Inside were five agents, none female. Typical.
I’d met most of the task force the previous two days, but two were new to me. Liu, Martinez, and Roth, the ones I’d met, nodded at me. The two I didn’t know glared at me, sizing me up. I stared back, appraising them as well. One man looked like a life-size GI Joe with his blond crew cut and perfectly square jaw. His muscles rippled through his long-sleeved dress shirt. Not really my type, but handsome nonetheless. The other I decided was the type of man who got beat up in high school and joined the FBI just to show he could. Round glasses covered half his plump face. The rest of him was not well built but not fat, either. You would pass him on the street and never give him a second look.
“Special Agents Clarkson, Jones, this is Dr. Iris Ballard,” Luke said. “She’s our consulting forensic psychologist.”
I shook hands. Both were firm but polite.
“I’ve heard about you, Dr. Ballard,” Clarkson, the nerd, said. “I even attended your lecture on geography and deviant behavior.”
“Hope I didn’t bore you.”
“Not at all.”
“Thank you.” I had fans coming out of the woodwork. Clarkson excused himself to go speak to Jones, leaving me the only one without a task.
Luke was back on the phone, speaking to Richmond. “Very good.” He listened for a second. “Well, if the timetable’s correct, he should have her in the woods now.” He paused. “No, that’s not acceptable! We need our people searching as well.” He breathed raggedly as he listened, his face constricting with tension with each second. “We have the technology and the experience. We have to.” He stopped dead. “Well, fix it.” He hung up the phone, muttering under his breath. I knew from experience it was best to just let him be. I walked over to Clarkson and Jones, who stood by the map.
“Are they still treating it as a missing persons?” I asked Clarkson.
“Yeah, till further notice.”
“They find her car?”
“Yeah, with the keys and one of her shoes on the ground next to it,” Clarkson answered. “That’s why they decided to forgo the forty-eight-hour waiting period.”
“What about the ex-husband, assuming she had one. Has he been ruled out?”
“His girlfriend alibied him. She was with him when the nanny called. He went to the site, found the keys, and called the police.”
“And that’s all the information we have,” Jones said. “We don’t really know much.”
“Then let’s concentrate on what we do know,” I suggested. “It takes him about an hour to get to the park, then he spends approximately two to four hours with her. And she was supposed to be home when?”
“Nine,” Clarkson answered. “She supposedly left work at eight thirty.”
“So the clock starts at eight thirty.” I turned to the clock on the wall. “It’s about three thirty now. That’s seven hours, two past the deadline.” I sighed. “I hate to say it, but we need to start thinking of this as a homicide. Clarkson, get on the horn to the parks service. Have them—”
Out of nowhere, Luke’s voice jolted us with its ferocity. “I give the orders!” he snapped from across the room. “Not you. We don’t treat this as a homicide until I say so!” The room had fallen silent with our collective shock. Luke scanned the room, daring the men to say something. “Get back to work!”
Clarkson, Jones, and I all exchanged glances, then averted our eyes to the spotted carpet and returned to our jobs. Luke shook his head before stalking out of our car. I started to chase after him but stopped myself. Best to let him cool off first.
“He’s been on this thing since the second victim,” Cl
arkson informed me. “There’s a lot of pressure on him right now.”
“I know,” I said. “I don’t take it personally.”
Liu, who towered a foot above me, gave me the evil eye for irritating the boss. “You should read this,” he said, shoving a file into my hands. “It’s all we have so far.”
“Thanks,” I said with a smile. After a scowl he retreated to the other end of the car. I turned to Clarkson. “Okay, what the hell was that about?”
Clarkson glanced around the room to make sure nobody was watching us. They weren’t, so he leaned into my ear. “Some of the guys don’t like the fact you were brought in.” I was about to open my mouth to protest, but Clarkson cut me off. “No matter what you were before, you’re a civvie now, but you get first crack at evidence and interviews. They resent it.”
“For fuck’s sake,” I said under my breath. “Thanks for telling me.”
Clarkson nodded and stepped toward the map. I opened the file.
Audrey Gloria Burke, age 35. Hair: Brown. Eyes: Green. Height: 5’3”. Weight: 105 lbs. Occupation: Orthodontist. Marital Status: Divorced from Kevin Burke, dentist. Children: Tiffany, age 7; Andrew, age 5. Home address: 2654 Goldfine Ct, Richmond VA. Reported missing by Tammy Collins, babysitter. Believed abducted from Virginia Medical Center parking lot between 8:30 and 8:45 P.M.
It was definitely our guy.
“Has anyone checked hotel reservations in Richmond yet?” I asked nobody in particular.
The men all looked at each other. “I think so,” Jones replied.
“You’d better call and make sure,” I said. “If he stayed at one he would have checked in between the seventh and the eleventh, and probably checked out earlier this afternoon.” Clarkson grabbed the nearest phone. I was sure Richmond was already looking into it, but you couldn’t be too careful. “Tell them to focus on the upscale ones,” I continued. “No way this guy stays at the Motel 6. Then cross-check names with van and SUV rentals from D.C. two weeks before. He probably drove down from D.C. if he drove, but check the rentals in Richmond as well.”
Beautiful Maids All in a Row Page 9