Cold Hard Magic

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Cold Hard Magic Page 2

by Rhys Astason


  "That's downright instinctive of you, Pegster," Walt said. "I'm thinking if you had taken that deputy exam, I might have had some competition for my job."

  Peggy giggled and batted his arm with a lingering touch. "Don't be silly, Deputy Walt. Little ol' me couldn't compete with a big, strong man like you."

  "I'm just saying," Rob interrupted, "that you can't discount all the possibilities. There are forces out there we can barely understand even in a small town like this."

  Peggy snorted and turned away to grab Walt's pancakes.

  "Well, why don't you tell me what you think happened, Bob?" Walt smiled again at Peggy as she carefully placed his plateful of food and topped off his barely tasted coffee. "You know, with that mumbo jumbo nonsense of yours." He forked a large chunk of pancakes and shoved it in his mouth.

  Peggy sent Rob a look of pure condescension. “Yeah, didn’t the magic didn’t tell you nothing?”

  Rob looked disappointed. “Not yet. I did all I could in my line of work, but there's nothing definitive." He shook his head. "Doc said she got killed with an axe," he continued. "That rules out the locals because…" he paused and scratched his head, "well, they mostly all prefer guns—"

  "See," Peggy jumped in, "it has to be a drifter then. Case solved."

  "Well, Pegs," Walt said between mouthfuls. "They might give you a medal for solving the case so quick."

  Peggy giggled. Rob sighed.

  "You keep working on the magic thing of yours, Bob," Walt said. "Let me know if it pans out any."

  "Well, I got a new tarot pattern to try," Rob said, pulling out his wallet. "So, I'll give you a call, Walt, if anything comes up."

  "Deputy," Walt said without looking at Rob. "Say, Peg, is there any more of those pancakes?"

  Rob slipped his payment under his plate and headed out. "See you later, Peggy," he called out from the door with a wave, but she was all eyes on Walt.

  Chapter 3

  The routine back home was the same as always for Rob.

  Checking orders. Printing orders. Packing orders.

  It turned out to be a light day, overall. Cold Hard Coats always did well this time of year, especially the heavy coats, but Cold Hard Facts… Rob sighed, looking at the lonely tarot deck in his hand. He slipped it into mailing envelope and sealed it.

  Jimmy's idea was great, but Rob had no idea how to promote the Cold Hard Facts website and merchandise on the Cold Hard Facts show. He scratched his head and looked at the packages. Maybe what he needed was some sugar to help him think. With that plan firmly in his mind, Rob picked up the boxes and set them outside the front porch for mail pickup, then headed for the kitchen.

  He stopped in front of the refrigerator, closed his eyes, took a deep breath and placed his hand on the door. Another deep breath and he drew a circle of energy on the door, before opening his eyes, then the door. With a refrigerator almost fifty years old, every little bit of good energy helped and it did so again.

  He learned the circle of energy bit from Betty Richardson of Milwaukee during one of Sioux City trips. She shared her guarantee to keep any appliance, regardless of age, running, over tea and cookies. Rob looked at the refrigerator.

  "It definitely works," he said. "Thanks, Betty." He grabbed a Mountain Dew and headed for his computer.

  "Now all I need," he said to himself, "is to figure out a way to mention the site. If only I could guarantee another showstopper revelation like Jimmy's."

  Rob stared at the practically glowing green soda can in front of him.

  Glowing.

  The doe!

  Cold Hard Facts quickly forgotten, Rob pulled up Google and searched for glowing deer and glowing deer Boydon. But the only results he got were Harry Potter, John Deere dealerships and a weird link about glowing lingerie.

  After thirty minutes in the lingerie website, he decided he needed a different type of inspiration. He went into his living room and got out his favorite Ouija board and set it up.

  "There is a land where we all go,

  Whence ne'er the frost nor cold wind blow,

  And friends remembered reunite,

  And those who hate, forget their spite,

  In glow surround these gentle beings,

  We call you now to bless our meetings,

  Heaven's promise, our spirits thrive,

  So now for the living, let the dead come alive.

  Greetings spirits,

  Speak thee to me?"*

  Rob looked at the board and waited. And waited.

  "Spirits are you here?"

  Nothing.

  After trying for several minutes to get a reading, he sighed and gave up, carefully packing the Ouija board away. The he grabbed the magical dice. He picked those up at Sioux City, too. Finding nothing with the dice, he tried throwing bones. Then made tea and looked at the leaves. Nada. He finally tried his trusted tarot deck. Zip.

  "It has to be a new species," he finally declared. "It's the only explanation."

  Rob poured himself another cup of tea, this time with a regular tea bag, and went back to the computer. Who could he ask about a new deer species? He suddenly closed his eyes and smacked himself in the head.

  Then he picked up his phone. Speed dial was a wondrous invention.

  "Hey! This is Larry. Listen to some good music and I'll be right wit'cha."

  "Who let yo puppies out? Woof, woof, woof, woof?"

  Rob smiled as he listened to Larry's version of a popular song.

  "This is Larry. What's your animal emergency?" A serious voice came on the line.

  "Hey, Larry. This is Rob."

  "How ya doing, Rob?" The voice was suddenly much friendlier. "It's not Mrs. Sampson's cow again, is it?"

  Rob shook his head, then remembered the phone. "I'm good. No, not it's not Sassy. I was just wondering if you've heard anything about some weird looking deer."

  "You mean like that two headed calf Mr. Longtrout used to scare us with?"

  "Well, no," Rob said. "More like glowing deer."

  There was a distinct scratching noise from Larry's end.

  "Can't say that I have," Larry answered after a long pause. "But then I wouldn't hear about deer unless they are snacking in someone's garden. You might try them university folks. No one pays me no mind, but I still swear they are doing some weird experiments over there."

  "Really?" Rob's head tilted in interest. He was always looking for a new story.

  "Oh yeah," Larry said. "The bird poo in that area is eating through everything and anything including that statue they have and it's made of metal and all. Hey, maybe that's something you can put on your show?"

  "Did you watch the other night?"

  "Oh yeah, Big Jimmy is amazing," Larry said. "Almost made me want to get up and go get his book. I didn't. But I thought about it."

  "Yeah," Rob said. "It was a showstopper. Listen, thanks for the head are up on the university. Maybe you can take some pictures when you're over there and come on the show to talk about it?"

  "Sounds great, Rob," Larry said. "I just have to find my camera. Dang grabby kids make everything disappear then don't know nothing about anything."

  "Don't know much about that," Rob said. "But I'll take your word for it. I'll talk to you soon and thanks again."

  "Later, gator."

  Rob snapped his phone shut and turned back to his computer. In no time, he found the university's web site and their animal husbandry department. Professor Gloria Wallenstein was the person to talk to if all her degrees and published papers were any indication.

  Rob stared at the faculty photo. She looked nice, too. There was a warmth that emanated from her eyes even in the photo. Professor Wallenstein — Why did that name sound so familiar? — was sure to be interested in his glowing deer. Easy peasy.

  He grabbed his phone and called.

  Unfortunately, it wasn't so easy.

  After being transferred, put on hold, disconnected, put on hold and transferred again, Rob was starting to get frustr
ated. He was relieved when a live person finally came on the line for longer than ten seconds.

  But that too, was short-lived.

  "No, sir," the sharp sexless voice said. "I cannot give you Professor Wallenstein's home number or address regardless of how important your new discovery is."

  "Could you give her my number and have her call me back?" Rob asked.

  "Sir," the voice said with an annoyed huff, "you will just have to wait for when classes resume after the holidays and visit Professor Wallenstein's office hours. I’m sure your new species can wait until then. Good day."

  Click.

  Rob sighed, then looked at his computer and smiled. Pulling the chair closer to the keyboard, he hit Google. After all, if it wasn't on Google, then it didn't exist.

  After ten minutes, Rob decided that Professor Gloria Wallenstein didn't exist.

  At least not outside academic papers, the university faculty page and an occasional photo, also related to the university. It was almost as if she had magically hidden all information about herself.

  Rob sat back on his chair. Wallenstein. Wallenstein. It felt so familiar in his mind. He looked at the icon on his desktop. It couldn't be that easy, could it?

  He clicked on the database of orders and did a quick search.

  No Wallenstein on Cold Hard Coats. On a lark, he tried Cold Hard Facts.

  Bingo!

  A Nancy Wallenstein had ordered a chalice set which was shipped to one Gloria Wallenstein. Rob smiled. He remembered that order even though it had been over a year ago. Nancy emailed a couple of times asking about the details of the chalice. She had been really nice, too.

  There was no guarantee that this Gloria Wallenstein was the same Professor Wallenstein, but then again, if she wasn't, he could ask her how she was liking the chalice set and ask about Nancy.

  Rob wrote down the address and grabbed his coat. It was only bitterly cold outside. Perfect day for a social call.

  Chapter 4

  Rob pulled up to the address he had written down. The house was in a newish neighborhood. It had only been around for ten years and consisted of spacious single story houses with wide driveways.

  Good thing too since the address he was headed to had several cars already packed in tightly like metal sardines.

  Undaunted, he trudged up the sturdy rock path to the house, passing several bright flowers. That stopped him in his tracks. Hyacinthus, Calluna vulgaris, Lavandula. All associated with protection and blooming. In the middle of winter.

  "Huh," Rob muttered. He leaned forward and touched a silky petal. "I thought you were fake there for a minute." He took a big sniff. "I have to remember to ask what she's using for fertilizer."

  He turned away from the plants and headed up the porch steps. There were more colorful flowers but this time in planters. All had extra meanings. Symbols of protection, wisdom and watchfulness.

  "Well, it's the right house for the chalice," he said. "That's for sure."

  Rob looked at the Greenman doorknocker and smiled. He tapped once at the handle and was about to do so again when the door opened.

  “Come on in!” A voice from inside called out. "We just started."

  Nice voice. He shrugged and made sure to wipe his feet before entering. Rob closed the door behind and looked around the hallway. Nice house. Turning the corner, he stopped at the doorway to the living room.

  The white robed women, lined up in a circle surrounding a table, looked up. Then stiffened.

  "Hi there." Rob smiled and waved, looking at each woman until he recognized a face. “Professor Wallenstein?”

  The woman at the apex of the circle nodded.

  “My name is Rob," he said as he stepped forward and into the room. "Hi. How are you?" He nodded to each woman he passed until he met the warmest brown eyes he'd ever seen and stumbled.

  Soft, pink tipped hands reached out to right him, holding his arms even after he straightened.

  Their eyes met again and time, at least for him, stood still while he stared at the lovely, pixieish woman. She was a tiny little thing, barely coming up to his chest, but she had hands of steel that were still gripping his arms tightly.

  "Excuse me," he said in a raspy voice that to his embarrassment nearly cracked as if he was fifteen again.

  A slight movement in her cheek drew his eyes to her lush pink lips. He must have stared too long because she suddenly folded her lips inward and dropped her hands.

  A sharp, clearing of the throat caused Rob to look up and meet Professor Wallenstein's quizzical gaze.

  "How you doin’?” Rob stepped forward, hand outstretched. "I'm Rob."

  Wallenstein met his eyes through a slightly furrowed gaze. Her eyes dropped to his hand, then she sighed and reluctantly took it.

  "May I help you?" she asked, guardedly meeting his eyes again.

  He was slightly disappointed that she didn’t appear to recognize him, peer to peer and all, but he shrugged it off.

  “Sorry to bother you," he started, "but I have been troubled about something. Could I ask you a question?"

  She nodded reluctantly.

  "That’s gracious of you," he said trying to keep his focus on the Professor and the pixie blonde now behind him.

  "Yes?" Professor Wallenstein prompted.

  “Oh, right," he stammered. "I saw a doe off of highway 810 near the Oldhousen’s place."

  "You don't say," one of the other women muttered.

  Rob licked his lips and forced his eyes to remain on the Professor. "Do you know that area? It's about a quarter mile or so away from the Rumhilde's?"

  "Do you know anything about what happened there?" Professor Wallenstein asked sharply, her posture stiffening further as if priming for an attack.

  "Very disturbing, that's for sure," Rob said. His eyes unfocused and he shook his head. He thought back on his conversation with Walt and Peggy. Something just didn’t sit right about it being just a drifter. "A drifter, they say."

  "You don’t think so?" The voice came from behind him. The same nice voice that had invited him. He wasn’t surprised that it belonged to his pixie. He turned.

  And forgot what he was going to say. She looked at him expectantly, but all he could think about was that she was as cute as a button.

  "You don’t think so?" The pixie asked again.

  His voice, or brain, started functioning again. "Well, it just doesn't feel right, you know?' He shrugged. "I haven’t been able to divine anything and I've tried just about anything I could think of but nothing came to me. It just….Well, it doesn’t seem like a drifter to me."

  Her head tilted sideways, considering what he said and slowly nodded.

  "Say," Rob said turning back to Professor Wallenstein, "you ladies haven't tried to divine anything, have you?"

  Professor Wallenstein sighed and crossed her arms. "The doe?"

  "Right," he nodded. "Well, this deer was real friendly," he said. "Came right up to me and all, butted me with her head to get my attention, but what struck me odd was that it glowed."

  Professor Wallenstein blinked. Slowly.

  "I searched on the internet but all I could find was…" His voice trailed off as his brain went immediately to the glowing lingerie. "Well, Christmas decorations and all," he continued. "I was thinking, maybe it could be a new type of deer." He looked at her expectantly. "Have you heard of glowing deer? I figured you'd be the one to ask because the university website says you would know these things.”

  "Glowing deer?" she asked. He nodded. She looked at him for several long seconds, then shook her head. "Can't say that I have."

  Rob cocked his head to the side. “Well, now that’s odd.”

  “Could it have been a trick of the light?” One of the other women asked.

  “No," he shook his head. "I thought about that before coming here, but I don't think so. It was pretty dark and nothing was glowing but my coat compass. I don’t see glowing things as this, everyday, you know.”

  "A coat compass?"
Another woman piped up with interest only to shrink back when her sisters glared at her.

  "Oh yeah," Rob continued, unperturbed. "It's going to be my new bestseller for sure. I run Cold Hard Coats and this new coat has the compass attached to it. Works great, too."

  He smiled at the woman who asked the question, but she only returned a small tight grimace that could pass off as grin if one looked real hard.

 

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