by Jolie, Mika
Anniversary. That word was for couples.
Jason smirked. “Fuck buddies celebrate anniversaries too, at least they want to. They just don’t say it.”
“Like you did with Rita,” Adam mumbled, reminding his friend of the incident between him and Rita before Minka came into his life.
“Touché. See, that’s how I learned my lesson. Even fuck buddies have expectations.”
“We don’t celebrate anniversaries,” Adam grunted. “We don’t celebrate anything. We fuck.”
“And now you’re having a child with her.” Forrest added, his voice low and controlled. “I suggest you get her to like you, maybe even love you a little, if you really want her to consider marriage.”
What was happening? The man who couldn’t get the woman he had a thing for to look his way was giving advice on relationships.
“From what I know of Lily, she’s her own person and stubborn,” Forrest continued.
“Like most women,” Jason added for good measure, and Blake nodded in agreement. Adam shared their pain.
“But,” Forrest paused, choosing his words carefully, “she has to feel something for you to continue this no strings attached but exclusive bullshit. No woman can go that long without getting somewhat emotionally invested.”
Adam heard those words before from his mother. If he didn’t know how alpha Forrest was, he would have insisted he turned in his Man Card. The other two dumbasses nodded their heads as if Forrest’s words were gospel. Okay, so maybe his friend had a point.
“You just have to make her want to admit it. And perhaps you should try to look beyond her ability to fuck your brains out on a daily basis. You know, try liking her back.” This came from Jason, the man who spent most of his life thinking with his dick first.
“I do like her.”
The admission didn’t surprise Adam. It was true, he did like Lily. Otherwise, sex or not he would not have hung around this long. But he’d never admitted it before. He never even considered whether he liked her as a person.
“Then show her.” The three men said collectively, as if they’d spent their whole lives waiting for this moment.
“I fucking got it,” he growled, though now he was a whole lot less pissed off.
Jason was the first to push his chair back and rise to his feet. “Good, because Blake and I have work to do and Forrest has sick fake patients to see. Good luck, bro. That’s some deep shit you’re in but fun for me to watch.” He patted Adam’s shoulder then started toward the door.
Blake and Forrest did the same, leaving Adam sitting by himself at Vapor. He reached for his phone and scrolled to Lily’s number. She was quick to answer.
“How are you feeling?”
“Better,” she answered in a low voice.
For the first time he detected a naked vulnerability in her tone. It made his heart squeeze. “I’m stopping by Jason and Minka’s to get your luggage then coming home. Let’s talk.”
She sighed. “Adam, I’m not marrying you.”
“No marriage.” For now. “Let’s just talk. Can we do that?”
“Yes,” she answered after a beat.
“Good. See you soon, Liliana.”
After he disconnected the call, Adam ran his palm over his face. He felt as if he’d been shoved off a cliff and ended up under a boulder. A heavy weight bore down on him, making him more unsettled and off balanced than he cared to admit. Maybe, just a little spooked.
In a few months he’d have a child. And if he succeeded at getting Lily to marry him, he’d be a husband. Adam let out a quick breath and scraped a hand through his hair. He rose from his chair, took one last swallow of his beer and headed for the door, ready to embrace the last thing he ever wanted to be in life…someone’s father.
Chapter Fourteen
“No matter how attractive a person’s potential may be, you have to date their reality.”
Mandy Hale
Tired and weary after her fourth trip to the bathroom to heave, Lily had hoped the shower would help. It didn’t. She slipped into another of Adam’s T-shirts, stepped inside the sunlit bedroom and came to an abrupt halt. There sat Adam on the bed, with his back against the ecru upholstered headboard, one leg hanging off the edge with the other planted on the floor. He vibrated tension and looked morose, a complete contrast to the room’s relaxed, sophisticated atmosphere.
His gaze swept her from head to toe, rested on her bare thighs, then went back to her face. For a brief moment, she caught a glimpse of the passion that existed between them, but it was quickly masked as he brought her attention to the dress in his hands, the one she wore last night. At some point, he’d torn it from her body, she just couldn’t remember exactly when that occurred.
“I’m sorry about your dress,” he apologized, his voice quiet. “It looked good on you.”
Tension filled the room, not the good sexual kind. More like, shit you’re pregnant with my child kind of tension. It made her uncomfortable. Not quite sure how to react, Lily walked over and took the dress from his hands. “It’s not a big deal.”
“Liliana.”
The way his voice rippled her name in that seductive accent caused her insides to quiver with apprehension and she clutched the dress for comfort.
“I assume you’ve been to the doctor.”
She nodded, her posture rigid.
“I am going to ask Forrest to stop by later to check up on you.”
“Adam, I’m fine.”
But his fingers were already typing away on his phone.
He looked her over once more. “You look pale.” He noted. “Let him check your blood pressure or something.” He put up a hand to stop any incoming argument. “For my own sanity.”
This made her smile. “Okay, if it will keep you sane.” She walked over to the battered Ludlow trunk at the end of the bed and placed the dress on top of a mocha-colored cable-knit throw. “But you do realize Forrest is a family doctor.” She glanced over at him, a small smile touched his lips and her heart squeezed a little.
“Did you cancel the room you booked at Martha’s Way?”
Lily shook her head and his jaws clenched.
“What do you want from me, Adam?” she asked after a moment of silence. It was time to address the big elephant in the room. He did say he wanted to talk, so might as well get to it. “I mean, I won’t keep you away from our child. That was never my intention.”
“Then what is your intention?”
She shrugged because really she had no clue. “I don’t want to be the one to turn you into someone you’re not.”
“And what is that someone?”
“A father, a husband,” she answered without a beat.
He rose from the bed, walked to where she stood, cupped her face in his hands and kissed her fully on the lips, rocking her universe and claiming her and their child in the process. Automatically, her hands thrust into the silky strands of his hair and Lily opened her mouth to urge him in. When he finally broke for air, she leaned into him, craving his touch.
“As of today, we are officially dating,” he said, with his arms around her.
Caught off guard, her body stiffened and she squeezed her eyes shut. Once again, Adam was taking over and mentally she was too weak to fight. Space. She needed to put space between them so she could think clearly. With a little shove, she broke away from his hold and walked to the opposite side of the room and sat on the bed.
“You said no marriage,” he continued, “so I will not push. But we deserve a chance to see if we like each other. I’m asking that we try.”
“Would you have suggested that if I wasn’t pregnant?”
Adam glanced at her and she met his gaze straight on.
“Probably not,” he answered. “But,” he quickly added, “It’s not because I don’t like you, Liliana.” He paused. “It’s because I’m not the type of man a woman dates, falls in love with, or marries, for that matter.”
“From what I can see, you’re pretty date
able.”
“You don’t know me,” he answered, his expression etched in stone.
The words floated in her head and pulled at her heart. There was something in his voice, if she didn’t know better, she could label as pain but dismissed it. From the outside looking in, Adam had the perfect life, rich, carefree with doting parents, and a wonderful group of friends. For the first time, she wondered if there were more layers to the man she had been sleeping with.
“Are you still hung up on that cheating asshole?” he asked when she didn’t speak.
The question surprised her so much that she almost laughed. “It’s been over a year. I think it’s fair to say I’m over the whole disaster.”
“I’m your rebound,” he reminded her.
From the bed, she glanced at him and was surprise to read the seriousness on his face. Maybe that night on the beach he had been, but somewhere along the way he’d stopped playing that role. “You’re not my rebound,” she said gently.
He shoved his fingers through his hair then came to sit next to her, his thighs brushed against hers. His hand reached for hers and netted their fingers. “I will stay committed to you.”
She chuckled because he didn’t have a clue how fast he made her heart race. “You make it all sound like a business deal.”
He shook his head, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “No, this is the start of our story.”
Had it been up to her, Lily would have never opened herself to another man again. Been there, done that with Nate, the two-timing bastard. There was no need to end up with another engagement ring in the ocean. And this time, there would be no Adam to turn to, make love to; he’d be the reason for her heartbreak. Not that she was afraid to take a stab at love again, maybe just afraid of getting hurt all over. The pain would be more intense this time around, and it scared the crap out of her because there wasn’t one person in the world she wanted more than the man holding her hands.
Loving him terrified her.
Still, she was more afraid of the idea of walking away without giving them a chance.
With their fingers laced together, she glanced at her left ring finger and exhaled. Maybe there were no right moments, right guys, right answers…maybe sometimes one just had to say what the heart was feeling.
“All right,” she said quietly. “I will date you, Adam.”
She just had to stick to her initial decision and not let him convince her into a loveless marriage. But hell, at least there’d be guaranteed great sex.
* * * *
Adam tried to focus on anything but the relief that hit him like a gush of cold air. Only his mind went flying to how hot she looked and how easy he could have her naked. With one swift movement he could tear off the small barrier of clothing between them and jump her. Shit. Semi-hard, he jerked upright and released her hand. He needed to have another talk with his conscience.
“You said you’ve been to the doctor,” he repeated the words from earlier; baby talk should do the trick.
Her eyes narrowed. “Yes.”
“Ultrasound to make sure…” His voice trailed off the last words. Just the possibility of not discovering a heartbeat gave him agita.
“All done.”
“By yourself?”
Staring at him, she shook her head. “No. One of the nurses stayed with me. She’s a friend.”
But her voice trembled and Adam cursed himself for letting her go through such an ordeal technically alone. “From now on I go to all doctor appointments with you. Is that understood?”
She gave him a faint smile. “I live in New Jersey, Adam. How do you intend to do that from here or wherever you may be?”
“I’ll be there. Just tell me and I’ll be there.”
She held his gaze. “You’ll drop everything to be by my side for our child?”
“Yes.”
She stood up and came to stand in front of him. His friends’ words echoed in his mind. During the drive back to the house, the sudden thought had hit him like a snowball made of granite—no more sex between them. He needed to quench his desire to own every inch of her and connect on a deeper level besides the physical intimacy. Whatever the fuck that meant in guy-land.
Just to be on the safe side, he took a step back but Lily was already pressing her sweet sexy body against him. She kissed his ear. He could hear her breath as she did so, making things more intense.
“Let’s use the next few days to discover each other.”
Her voice carried implications as she wrapped her arms around him. For a brief second, he thought about going at it once more. What was once more? He sucked in air and released her arms from his neck. A frown crossed her face.
“We have one rule though.”
Her head fell back. Eyebrows squished together, lips pursed, she gave him a look. “So no more any-strings-attached-but-exclusive rule. That’s out the window, right?”
“Right.”
“But there’s a new rule to us dating?”
“Yes.”
She rolled her pretty brown eyes, tucked a handful of hair behind her ear and laughed. She never looked more beautiful to him. And everything about her was screaming take me. He ached for her. This was going to be harder than he thought.
“Liliana.” He tried to sound curt but failed.
She cleared her throat. “Oh boy, I’m scared. You look serious.” One delicate hand touched her flushed face. A sigh slipped through her lips. “Okay, give it to me.”
“No more sex.”
Her eyes widened in shock. “What?”
“Liliana.” He reached for her hands but she swiped him away.
“Don’t call me that.”
“That’s your name.”
“Yeah, but…” she let out an exasperated sigh. “When you say it in that sexy Italian drawl, I immediately get wet. And now you’re saying no sex.” She paused, crossed her arms over her chest. “What do you mean no sex?”
“Sex will cloud our judgment.” Yeah, even in his own ears his excuse sounded weak.
Her teeth caught her bottom lip, mulling over his words.
So he decided it was the best time to lay the ground rules. “We’ve been having sex for over a year now and barely know each other. All I’m asking is for a chance for us to do that.”
Who the fuck was this person talking? Adam wanted to know. And while at it, he’d like to get his balls back.
“And after that?” she asked in a low voice, filled with suspicion.
“We continue as we were.” And I intend to kidnap you to an island and keep you there until you become Mrs. Aquilani. But she didn’t have to know that.
“Continue having sex, you mean.”
He huffed. Shit, he was beginning to feel like the one being used. “Yes, continue to have sex if that’s what you want, but you’ll be pregnant and all.”
“So.”
He stared at her.
She tossed up her hands. “Pregnant women still have a sex drive, Adam. As a matter of fact, it increases.”
That’s right; he read about that once somewhere. “Like now?”
She nodded. “Yes.” She released a deep breath. “Thank God I brought Bob.”
Now he was lost. “Who the fuck is Bob?”
With a jutting chin she deliberately raised her eyebrows. “Battery Operated Boyfriend, also known as BOB,” she spat out the words.
He frowned, his muscles and veins straining against his skin. Lily had a dildo. How the hell did he not know about that? His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer. “You have a dildo.”
It was a statement, but she smiled and gave him a dismissive nod. “You’re not always around. A girl has needs.”
“Okay, then play with your dildo. But—” He stopped and stared at her. “I get to watch.”
She shrugged. Whatever. Crossed her arms over her chest, gave him another uneasy look before dropping her sweet ass on the bed and turned her back to hi
m. From any other woman, he would have found the act irritating and annoyed the shit out of him. But not with Lily. For a minute, he studied her, sighed and put both hands on his forehead. He was torn between the devil and the angel sitting on his shoulders; one wanted to remind her a fucking dildo couldn’t do the job, not like he could, and the other wanted to take care of her. Finally, he walked out of the room and didn’t look back until he was by the door.
“You and I are going on a date tomorrow,” he announced.
She didn’t answer. Adam swore under his breath before closing the door behind him. Thoughts of Lily pleasuring herself in the room burned his brain. His friends were idiots, which made him an even bigger idiot for believing he could be around her and not want sex.
Chapter Fifteen
“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone. Take risks.”
Anonymous
The salted sea air was solid in the village of Menemsha, a small fisherman’s town in Chilmark, where Adam’s restaurant, The Wharf’s Side, was located on the historic harbor. As they drove through the light breeze of the early evening, Lily admired the fishing cottages. Being on the quiet coast, the town felt like a remote oasis, secluded from the bustle of tourists and shoppers typical of Edgartown and Oak Bluffs.
She had been surprised upon learning their date was to be at his famous restaurant, the “must” place to dine when on the island. Not only had she never been there, it was one of those things she learned about Adam in passing. Today, she was entering his world for a glimpse of all the little things personal to him. In fact, this was her first time in the town located just fifteen minutes away from his house.
Her heart began to race the moment the car pulled into the reserved parking spot. With anxiety curled in her stomach, she ran nervous hands over the skirt of her dress. This was it. Their first date.
He turned to face her, and those gorgeous, breathtaking eyes caught a wink of sunlight. A perfect blend of molten chocolate marbled with rich flecks of gold, they seemed full of life as his mouth opened in a broad smile.