“It's all right,” he said. “Give me your coat.”
Setting down his bag, Miko let Toby peel his coat off of him, pulling it on inside out to cover the blood in one fluid movement and picking Miko's bag back up. “You are such a good spy!” Miko laughed, feeling significantly better now that the blood was hidden.
Putting his arm around Miko's shoulders, Toby walked him out to the parking garage. “What the hell happened?”
“It is long story.”
Helping him into the car, Toby immediately went for the wound but he paused when he saw exactly where the blood was coming from. “I did this when I hugged you,” he stated with such guilt on his face that Miko doubted he'd ever forgive himself.
“Do not be silly,” Miko offered. “The bullet did it.”
Toby's jaw dropped. “You've been shot? How could you not tell me you've been shot?”
“You would worry?”
It looked like Toby would never do anything but worry from now on. “Oh my God. This is because I called you, isn't it? I distracted you—”
“You saved me. I let you make me late and it saved me. This,” he gestured to the wound that in his mind was flooding the car with blood, “is nothing but long story.” It didn't feel like nothing, and Toby could always tell when Miko was lying so he added, “Good story!”
Hugging him around his head like Nasir did, Toby buried his face in Miko's hair. “Jesus Christ, Miko.” He sniffled and released him, reaching into the glove compartment for some tissues.
“I have things in my bag.”
Toby gave him an unconvincing glare and bent down to go through Miko's duffel bag where he'd dropped it and the flowers on the pavement by the car. He handed Miko the flowers before carefully unbuttoning his shirt. “Don't look.”
Closing his eyes, Miko held the flowers to his face. These were flowers from home, not flowers Toby had picked up on the way to the airport. The stems were bare, unwrapped. Miko imagined he could smell the bedroom on them.
“Simon killed Hector?” Toby asked after setting a new layer of gauze over the saturated one. He'd left his hands on Miko's chest, lightly touching him where he'd placed the tape. Miko was glad for it.
“He thought Hector would convince me to leave it alone.” The conversation he'd had with his papa was replaying in his head on a loop.
Gently stroking his face to get Miko to look at him, Toby simply said, “I'm sorry.” He hugged Miko again, their foreheads together. “This isn't your fault, Miko. You know that right?”
Miko felt like crying all over again. “Simon did because of me.”
“No, he did it to manipulate you. That doesn't make it your fault.”
“If I listened to Hector—”
“Hector died trying to protect you. Don't you realize that? He didn't die of a broken heart, he died because he was looking out for you. He wouldn't have given up trying to keep you safe any more than you could give up your vengeance for Ophelia.”
Miko hadn't realized that. He'd been imagining Hector as Simon's victim, a weak old man killed in his bed. But Toby was right. Hector would've fought to the death with as little as he had, and he would've done it for Miko no matter who he was in love with. “He was protecting me.”
“And you know what Simon got out of everything? A single fucking hit. A hit that killed one of his men.”
“István. He drowned someone in a toilet.”
“Yeah, and think of how pissed Simon was to lose that skill set.”
“It is good skill to have,” Miko said with a smirk. He gripped Toby's hands even though there may have been blood on them. “Thank you for making me happier.”
“Don't think for a second that I'm not really annoyed with you for not telling me you'd been shot,” Toby warned. “Did you...take care of Simon?”
“Nas did.”
Toby sighed and turned away, looking just as sad as he'd been for Miko. “Poor Nasir.” He consolingly held Miko's hand tighter, proving just how well he understood him. “Is he okay?”
“I do not know.”
“People can come to terms with anything.” Toby smiled and kissed Miko's head. “Remember? He told you that.”
“Yes.” With everything that had happened, Miko hadn't remembered.
“Let's get you home.” Toby put the bag in the backseat and got in the car, taking a moment to steady himself before backing out of the space. “Did you get to find out who...um...”
“Rodrigo.”
“Shit.” Toby missed his turn at the distraction and had to loop around again. “Rodrigo? Really?”
“Simon told Nas that she said his name. She recognized him and she said his name, and now he's terrified that the Mako Shark is after him.”
“The Mako Shark is after him.” Toby anxiously licked his lips and asked, “Aren't you?”
“I will exsanguinate him.”
Toby nodded and said nothing, continuing the drive in silence.
Miko tried to get his bag out of the backseat when they got home, but Toby sternly said, “Don't even think about it” in a way that implied Miko would be sleeping on the couch with one more indiscretion, so he settled for carrying the flowers and let Toby do the not so heavy lifting. But when Toby put his key in the lock, it didn't click.
It wasn't locked.
“It's fine, Miko,” Toby said when he saw the panicked look on Miko's face. “I must've forgotten to lock it. I was in a hurry to pick you up and—” Miko held him back, signaling for him to be quiet.
Pushing the door open, Miko took in what he could see: empty hall, the light left on. He picked up the crystal candy dish from the side table that Toby kept his keys in, holding it in his hand like a weapon as he led Toby inside. Toby gripped Miko's wrist to avoid pulling off his fingers, stopping himself every time he tried to open his mouth and protest what Miko was doing.
Miko could smell blood but he wasn't seeing any. He wasn't seeing anything.
Finally Toby got words out that actually gave Miko pause. “You're scaring me.”
There was no one inside. Miko released him and put the candy dish back, dead-bolting the door and slumping against it, his heart racing.
“I forgot to lock it, Miko. It's not the first time.”
Miko shook his head. “I picked your lock, Toby. I did break in. You were not so tired you forgot it.” He could still remember Toby's expression when he came home from work and unexpectedly found Miko in his kitchen after not seeing him for months. It was a smile that had made it to Toby's face, more than fear or anger. He'd been happy to see him even under the circumstances.
“I thought so,” Toby said.
Rubbing his head, Miko admitted, “I am scared too.”
“Of what?”
He swallowed down a lump in his throat. “Being bad for you. Making you scared and worried. Losing you.”
Toby came to him, still wearing Miko's inside out coat, and he wrapped his arms around him in a way that wouldn't get him bleeding again. “I love you, Miko. I want to be together forever. And hey, if Simon's dead maybe people will stop trying to kill you so I don't have to worry.” Miko laughed, then winced. Toby rolled his eyes. “Come on, little spoon.”
He brought Miko to the sofa and went to wash his hands so he could address the wound properly. “This had better be a good story.”
“It is!” Miko exclaimed, wincing again and settling back down. “I was supposed to kill this man at exactly three o'clock but then you called and I got excited and was a little bit late.”
“Maybe now that Simon's dead you'll stop fucking up jobs,” Toby teased, gently taking off Miko's shirt. He pulled off the gauze and held his other hand above the wound so Miko couldn't see.
Focusing his eyes on the ceiling, Miko continued, “If I did at three o'clock I would not have seen his daughter and I would not do in front of little girl anyway, but she was wearing Nas's bunny ears!”
Toby gaped at him. “Bella's daughter?”
“And then I saw Fran
k was with him! He is civilian but like Frank's baby brother. Simon set me up to kill him so they would kill me, but they are my friends so I followed them and went to Frank to tell him.” Toby had completely abandoned his nursing duties, sitting on the floor enthralled while Miko bled on the sofa. Neither of them noticed. “The client wanted a witness but I didn't know who she was or who the witness was and I went to cafe with Frank and he was with little girl and there was a baby too, and then a man came who was the witness and he had a gun and I had vest so I thought I was okay so I took bullet for Frank.” Miko smiled, clearly pleased with himself. Toby was no longer smiling.
“Goddamnit, Miko.” Toby shook his head, then shook it even more when he realized the state of the sofa. He went back to patching Miko up. “These people should be idolizing you.”
“They are my friends. Really now. Frank gave me hug for two seconds even though he does not do hugs. Blondie apologized for beating me up. And when I went in the woods with Frank he said he would not carry me if I could not walk but I know he would.”
Toby sighed, trying not to laugh. “Why didn't you just stay there until you felt better? You shouldn't be traveling like this, and being there is a dream come true for you.”
Miko cocked his head, the same way Nasir did when Miko said something that didn't make sense. “Toby, I think you have been cooking with bad fumes.” Toby blushed and sat on the sofa with him. Miko slowly lay down on Toby's lap, his cheek on the place on Toby's thigh that had once belonged to Emmett and now belonged solely to Miko. “I would have come sooner if doctor said okay.”
Stroking his hair, Toby gazed down at him as if this were all somehow perfectly normal. Miko got shot, Toby changed his bandages. If the couch got stained, Toby could get the stains out. Toby could clean up anything. “Did you tell them about me?”
“A little. Not really details, but I talked to Frank about having civilian. It works, you know? He is with Bella and she is pretty scary. More than I am.”
“But they do know about me?”
“Yes?” Miko had a feeling he was walking into a trap.
“So instead of risking your life getting on a plane, I probably could've just flown there to see you?”
“Well...how could you come if you did not know I was shot?”
Toby laughed, then gave him a dirty look. “I'm gonna smack you.”
“But I am injured,” Miko said innocently.
“You're gonna be injured,” Toby threatened.
“In kinky way?” he tried, but they both frowned at the realization that it would be some time before they did anything in “kinky way.”
The frown deepened on Toby's face and his expression grew solemn. “You didn't call to say goodbye to me.”
“It was not so bad.” Miko left out the part about Frank taking his phone, and about blindfolding him because he didn't really trust him. In his mind they were best friends from the first moment, and he selectively omitted the parts he didn't like. It was only a matter of time until Frank did do hugs.
“You just about fainted in the airport when you saw the blood, you're telling me it wasn't worse when it happened?”
Miko reached for Toby's other hand, pulling his arm closer. The blood thankfully hadn't soaked through Miko's coat, but he wouldn't let Toby wear that shirt again even if he could get the stain out. Miko had no intention of keeping the coat. Maybe Sophie would want it. “The blood was worse, but it was not on you.” He amended, “I think it was worse. I am not best judge.”
“Now that is the truth.”
Miko snuggled against him. “There was a girl there, Sophie. She is au pair. She got kidnapped by Malkolm and now she is a bit crazy like me. I tell her assassin stories. She is going to take care of Fee's cat.”
“Sophie?” Toby smirked. “Of course.”
“Why of course?”
“Because you say her name just like that. So fee.”
Miko turned his face to hide his embarrassment. He hadn't even noticed. “She is more like Tola I think. Outgoing.” She looked more like Tola than Ophelia ever had. Dark hair and eyes, she and Miko could pass for siblings. “She wears red glasses.”
“Makes her bold. Are you gonna write to her?”
“You think is weird?”
“You, weird? Never!” Toby squirmed when Miko playfully pinched him, but not enough to jar Miko with the movement. “Where are her parents? MIA like yours?”
“Missing in action,” Miko confirmed, always pleased to get Toby's acronyms. “Her mother is dead. Her father is friend of Frank's. He runs Frank's bookshop for him. Frank owns a bookshop. That is how he knew about Fee's biography.”
“A bookshop?” he balked. “Your super cool assassin idol who killed someone with flowers owns a bookshop?”
“He was retired. You think is weird?”
Toby laughed. “Just...unexpected. It's so normal.” Miko shrugged. He considered it more along the lines of extraordinary, but that was just him. “Isn't he still working though? Or working again?”
“Again,” Miko said. He hadn't asked Frank about retirement. It was Sophie who told him about the bookshop. He was tempted to call Frank and talk to him, but he imagined they were very busy with all the other assassins they needed to kill as a precaution.
“And what about you?” Toby asked, his fingers slowing to a stop in Miko's hair as he looked at him expectantly. “Your handler is dead, are you...”
Miko had only gone back to work to stop Nasir from doing it. He didn't think Nasir would be killing anyone for a very long time. Miko only had Rodrigo to kill on the horizon. He smiled, knowing exactly “what about” him. “We travel, silly. That is what we do.”
A Different Kind of Story
Miko: Age 25
Still feeling like he was covered in the blood of his last marks, Miko traveled to Hector's home where he was certain he could get clean. After Tola's murder, Hector had taken Miko to a rest stop to wash his face and properly dress his wound. To rinse his mouth. But it wasn't until Hector brought Miko back to Germany, to his house where he bathed Miko and brought him clean clothes that Miko finally felt like the blood was gone.
He only spoke with Hector briefly to say hello and declare his intentions before heading upstairs, but he was twitching enough that the old man would've been able to see it, so Hector did not fault him for his breach of etiquette. Miko turned the water on as hot as it would go, which wasn't as hot as Miko would've liked because of the advanced age of the pipes. But it was enough that he could look down and see the water running clear as it should've been after only a few minutes.
Miko's eyes found the dark contrast of the bruises on his arms from the Kevlar, and he stared down at his body instead of the water circling the drain. The only hands to touch him in so long had been his marks, desperately fighting for their lives. He felt very much alone.
Ophelia had invited him to come live with her, locked away from the world. Hiding. There was nothing left for her on the outside, no reason to leave the house. In that moment he decided he would. There was nothing left for Miko either. Just his job. Just death.
Hector had laid out clothes on Miko's bed for him, and he was downstairs preparing lunch that Miko would not be permitted to refuse no matter how politely he tried. “You are having a hard time these days,” Hector said as Miko sat at the kitchen table, pulling the vase of flowers closer to himself and resting his head on his arms.
Miko wondered what exactly defined a “hard time” according to Simon. His handler was the only one who would've mentioned anything to Hector. “He gives me horrible hits.”
“He gives you what he believes you can handle. That is part of his job.” Hector patted Miko's back. “Perhaps Simon isn't nearly as good at his job as he thinks he is.”
Lifting his head, Miko asked, “Have you ever been in love?”
“I have been in love many times.”
Miko sighed. That wasn't true. It couldn't be true. He couldn't imagine feeling this way about anyone ever a
gain. He'd loved Toby with everything he had. He still loved Toby. “But you did not get married. Or have children.”
“This life is not meant for such things, my boy.” Hector pulled up a chair beside him. “For someone to know who you truly are, and accept you, is not common. Even if it happens, people get scared. Fear is stronger than love. It's in our nature to survive. Your heart can be replaced. Your life cannot.”
“You had someone that you loved? They got scared?”
“I've fallen for women who would never understand me, but there was one, a very special one,” Hector plucked a flower from the vase and twirled it in his hand, “she knew who I was. She knew everything. Then one day I went to see her and she was gone.”
“She was murdered?” Miko gasped, his eyes wide.
“No, Miko. She ran away. From me. She left her whole life to get away from me.” He put the flower back. “When you get close to someone, you may not see them clearly. I did not realize just how afraid she was. I thought it was enough to be together, but I was wrong.”
“Why was she afraid?”
“Telling them what we are is not the same as showing them. She and I were walking one night, and we took a shortcut through a tunnel. There was a gang of men in the tunnel, but I told her to keep walking even though she wanted to turn around and go the long way home. As we got closer, their intentions became very clear, but people like us, Miko, do not have the same sense of fear that a civilian might. We are the apex predators. They had clubs and bottles. I had my pride.” Hector paused to laugh, which made Miko twitch again. He knew this story had an unhappy ending but he still didn't want Hector to waste a moment before telling it. “I told her to run and she did, and I went at them with such ferocity. They had offended me, upset my companion, and I wanted to punish them. Now, I did not have to kill them. I disabled them very easily, but that was not enough for me. I finished them off, and then I saw that she'd made it to the end of the tunnel and stopped. She'd watched the entire thing.”
Toby had kissed Miko after he attacked Emmett. He wasn't afraid of Miko because he trusted that Miko would never hurt someone he loved. Then Toby had watched the news of Fee's attack, got the skewed information from the mouths of her parents. He'd probably watched for hours.
The Mercy of the Mako Shark Page 19