by Wendy Vella
“You look tired this morning, Claire. Did you not sleep well?”
Pulled from her thoughts by her brother’s voice, Claire looked across at Mathew. He usually never conversed in the morning—well, at least until he had finished reading his paper. She searched for her mother and noted she had left the room while Claire had been deep in thought. “All you have said to me in the past two days, Mathew, is how tired I look,” Claire said, keeping her tone light.
“Perhaps that is because you keep swallowing a yawn when you think I’m not looking.”
Her family did not know she had trouble sleeping since Anthony’s death, and why would they, as they were sleeping when she was not. Furthermore, she wasn’t close enough with Mathew to confide in him. And she had no wish to worry her mother.
“More tea, Miss Belmont?”
Claire gave Plimley a grateful smile. He was always near when she needed a diversion. Her mother, she could usually distract, but Mathew tended to be more tenacious. “Thank you, Plimley, and how is Helen this morning?”
“Much better, thank you, Miss Belmont. Her headache is passing, and she should back to work tomorrow.”
“Who is Helen?”
“Honestly, Mathew, Helen is one of your maids and she suffers terribly from headaches. But we seem to be getting them sorted, as this is the first in many months.” Claire lifted her cup and took a sip.
“Do you know the names of all the staff here, Claire?”
Simon Kelkirk was the only other person who stared at her the way Mathew was doing right now. It was as if no one else existed at that moment. For the most, Claire avoided her brother’s penetrating looks and probing questions, but occasionally, when she wasn’t concentrating, he caught her out.
“Yes, Mathew, I do.”
He looked at her steadily. “You haven’t answered my question little sister. Are you tired this morning?”
“Of course I’m tired, Mathew. I danced until my feet hurt and did not find my bed till well past midnight.”
“Before he died Anthony told me he was worried about you because you had stopped sleeping since he returned, as you insisted on caring for him during the night. He feared that with his death this would not change. Is that the case, sister, do you struggle to sleep?”
His question surprised her, as they rarely mentioned their brother. The subject was too painful for both of them.
“Claire?”
“Why are you asking me this now when he has been dead many years?” Claire kept her eyes on the plate before her. “All this brotherly concern is quite overwhelming,” she added, keeping her tone light.
“Because he also told me you needed watching, and to my lasting regret, I have provided for you but perhaps not watched over you as well as I should have.”
Claire gripped the sides of her chair hard as she looked up at the concern in his eyes. Why now did he want to play the big brother when before, he was indifferent to her?
“I am all grown up now, Mathew. There is no need for this, I assure you. We are not like that, you and I–”
“Like what, Claire? Close, do you mean, as you were with Anthony?”
She had told Anthony everything. There had been moments since their brother’s death in which Claire had needed Mathew, had wanted him to hold her and tell her everything would be all right and that the pain of missing Anthony would ease, but he had never been there for her, and perhaps she had not been there for him, either, but it was too late now to establish that kind of relationship. “I am not sure why we are having this conversation now, Mathew.”
She wanted to pull away from his intense gaze, yet could not do so. It was almost as if he was willing her to look at him.
“I hope you would come to me if you had a problem, Claire.”
“What problem could I possibly have, Mathew? My life is exactly as it should be.”
Again, she was subjected to a long, silent look.
“And yet you received a note yesterday, delivered to the servant’s entrance, and then you left the house without your maid.”
Dear god!
“I want to know what was in that note, sister.”
“I-It was just a note from a friend in need, Mathew. Nothing nefarious, I assure you,” Claire said with a dismissive wave of her hand. Who had told him?
“What are you two talking about?”
Dragging her eyes from her brother, Claire looked gratefully at her mother as
she walked back into the room. Forcing herself to let go of the chair, she reached for her cup and took a large mouthful of the lukewarm tea. “Mathew was telling me his eggs were cold,” Claire said quickly.
“Well, perhaps if he had eaten them when they were hot instead of burrowing into the paper, he would have enjoyed them more.”
“Thank you, Mother, I had not thought of that.”
Claire knew she should have told Mathew about the note. However, she hadn’t because it had singled her out, and said not to tell anyone. She also believed that whatever Anthony had left behind was very important, and Claire wanted nothing to hinder her chances of retrieving it.
“Are Eva and the baby still coming for a visit this morning, Claire?”
“Indeed they are, Mother, and I had best get ready to greet them,” Claire said, rising. “Excuse me.”
Mathew’s eyes followed her from the room, and Claire was glad to close the door behind her. One of the staff must have told him about the note, and like Simon, Mathew was tenacious and would ask her until she told him what it had said.
“Lord, what a conundrum,” Claire muttered as she made her way back to her room. Her life had been so simple just a few days ago, and now she had the note, Simon, and Mathew to contend with.
Her maid helped her change and prepare for Eva’s visit, and she applied more powder, then pinched her cheeks, hard.
“The Duchess of Stratton has arrived, Miss Belmont.”
“Thank you, Plimley,” Eva called through the door.
Claire made her way down the stairs to where Eva and Georgia were waiting. The smile on her face was now genuine. She had fallen in love with the little cherub, and at least for a few hours, she could be herself, chat and laugh with her best friend and mother without a brooding male questioning her. Hurrying inside the parlor she came to an abrupt halt.
CHAPTER FOUR
Simon was standing by the windows with Georgia in his arms. He was having a conversation with Mathew, and both men seemed oblivious to the fact that the little girl had undone Simon’s necktie and was sucking on it.
“Hello, Claire.”
Dragging her eyes from the picture Simon presented and forcing the smile back onto her face, Claire hurried to greet her friend.
“Simon insisted on accompanying me when he heard Grandmother was visiting with Daniel. You know how she terrifies him.”
Claire kissed Eva’s cheek and tried not to look at Simon.
“You don’t mind, do you?”
Yes, she shrieked silently. “Of course not.”
“You had best go and give Georgia a kiss, Claire. She has noticed your arrival.”
The little girl was waving her hands about and making noises and looking at Claire, who did not want to go anywhere near the male holding her or her brother, yet could not resist the child in his arms, so she made her way to where they stood.
Claire curtsied to Simon, avoiding his eyes as he stopped speaking to Mathew and looked at her. She then took one of the hands Georgia was waving about. “Hello, sweetheart, how are you today?”
“Very well, darling, and you?”
The deep words were whispered in her ear as Mathew turned to speak to a footman. Ignoring them and the small shiver they produced inside her, Claire leant forward and kissed the baby’s cheek.
“She likes it if you make disgusting noises whilst you kiss her.”
“I don’t make disgusting noises, Lord Kelkirk,” Claire said in a prim voice that made her sound like her mother. She wanted to take the chi
ld from him, yet did not want to ask.
“What? Never? How very controlled you are, Miss Belmont.”
She refused to acknowledge those words or the meaning behind them, so she ignored him and ran a finger down the baby’s soft cheek.
“Excuse me for a moment. There is a matter I must attend to.”
Simon and Claire nodded to Mathew, and then he left the room with the footman at his heels. At least one of her problems had gone.
“I like to be in control.” Claire knew she sounded defensive, yet couldn’t help herself.
“Surely there are times when you can let someone else take up the reins?”
She always felt he was saying one thing and meaning another. The man was very taxing to converse with. “I prefer to handle my own reins, thank you, my lord.” Claire took the tiny fist Georgia waved at her and opened the fingers to press a kiss on her palm.
“I have quite a steady hand on the reins, so I’ve been told, should you need to share.”
Blowing out a frustrated breath, Claire looked up into his twinkling grey eyes. “Can you never be serious?”
He did not answer straightaway, and Claire held her breath as she waited for a response.
“If you’ll remember last night, Claire, I was very serious.”
Babies presented the perfect opportunity to avoid answering difficult questions, so Claire ignored Simon and began to tickle Georgia under the chin until the little girl gurgled back at her.
“It constantly amazes me that such a small creature can captivate a room full of adults. She is a constant delight, isn’t she? I swear she holds my heart right there in that tiny palm.”
The sincerity behind his words touched Claire, and for that brief moment as they looked at Georgia, she knew they were of one mind. This little girl meant so much to both of them.
“It is no different for me, my lord.”
“I know,” he said and then handed her Georgia. “Don’t you think it grossly unfair that when she belches, moves her bowel, or makes a lot of noise, everyone applauds, telling her what a good baby she has been, yet if I did the same I would be run out of town?”
Claire had always kept her distance from Simon Kelkirk because there was something about him that unsettled her. He wasn’t like other men; he didn’t observe the correct distance when conversing or dancing with a woman, nor did he guard his tongue. In fact, he was the opposite of everything she strove to be, and she had never known how to handle him. He was the darling of the ton, perhaps because of his uniqueness and perhaps because everything he did was usually accompanied by a smile. Even the hardened old tabbies loved him.
Their relationship had started with her provoking him and had never really changed. He was to her like the stable master’s son had been growing up. He had thrown things at her, pushed her over and generally tormented her, and because she had thought him the most handsome boy she had ever seen, she had done the same back. Of course, she didn’t think Lord Kelkirk the most handsome man she’d ever seen; he just produced the same reactions in her.
“I hardly think that is something that should be discussed on a morning call, Lord Kelkirk.”
He studied her so thoroughly that Claire held her breath again, and then he bent down and spoke to the baby. “Aunty Claire will be gentle with you, Georgie. It’s just men she doesn’t like.”
“I…I do so like men!” Claire spluttered, clamping a hand over the baby’s ears.
She was subjected to another steady look. “So it’s just me you don’t like, then. I had wondered.”
Claire had worked hard over the years at not losing her composure. She rarely blushed. The few times she had, she’d been in this man’s company. She hated the heat that stole into her cheeks at his words now. It suggested he could unsettle her, which obviously, he did. “Perhaps if you were not hellbent on provoking me, we would not constantly be at each other’s throats,” she snapped, ignoring the heat in her cheeks. “And my name is Miss Belmont.”
He gave her a wide smile that showed off his white teeth and made him look far too handsome. Horrid beast. He knew what his smile did to a woman–not her, of course, but the more foolish of her sex. “Is that your way of telling me that if I was nicer, you would like me, Claire?”
“I neither like nor dislike you, Lord Kelkirk. We are acquaintances.”
Suddenly he looked serious. His eyes lost their friendly sparkle, a sight she had rarely seen. “I had hoped we were friends, Claire. Friends who are there for each other, should we be required.”
She suddenly felt warm all over, as if him saying he was there for her had lit a torch inside her and was heating all those places that had never been warm before. “Don’t…please.” Claire stumbled over the words as she looked down at Georgia nestled against her.
“Don’t what, Claire? Tell your brother I saw you in a distressed state yesterday and you will not tell me why? I’m concerned for you–can’t you understand that?”
She shouldn’t feel a rush of joy just because he was worried about her, she told herself. The baby must have felt the tension between them, as she started to fuss. Lifting her over her shoulder, Claire rubbed Georgia’s back. How did she answer him? “There is nothing wrong with me, Lord Kelkirk, and the reasons I was there are mine alone. Now if you will excuse me, I have neglected Eva for too long.”
She hurried to sit next to the duchess, who did not notice her agitation, having eyes only for the child she instantly took onto her lap. Ignoring Simon as he moved to take the seat beside her, Claire started to chat about the previous night’s engagement until tea arrived.
“How do you take your tea, Lord Kelkirk?” Claire said, looking down at the pot in her hands.
“Milk and sugar, Claire.” He said her name slowly, drawing out the single syllable to make it sound as though it had four. “And I will take one of those biscuits. Perhaps two,” he added.
Claire placed the cup and plate on the small table to his right.
“You are, indeed, kindness itself, Miss Belmont.”
“And you are are bloody irritating,” she hissed before she could stop herself. His laughter followed her back to her seat.
“Daniel has been called to Stratton, Claire, and I have decided to accompany him. We are to leave in three days.”
“How long will you be gone?” Claire said, looking at her friend. She would miss her dearly, and her daughter, too.
“Only a week or two but I had wondered if you would like to accompany us? Daniel thinks the rest will do you good.”
Claire replaced her cup on its saucer slowly. “Why does he think I need a rest?”
“He said he caught you yawning several times behind your hand last night, and that you had smudges beneath your eyes, if one got close enough to notice.”
He hadn’t said anything, but she felt the intensity of Simon’s gaze sharpen on her face as Eva spoke. Whereas before he’d been listening with one ear while his mind had seemed to wander, as most men’s did when women gossiped, now he was focused fully on the conversation she and the duchess were having.
“I had not realized I looked so haggard.” Claire tried not to make the words sound shrill, yet they did, anyway. She suddenly felt panicked. First Simon and Mathew, now Daniel. Had anyone else seen the smudges and yawns?
“Now, darling, you know that’s not true–it is simply that Daniel knows you better than most and was concerned.”
Claire felt small for her peevish behavior. She took the hand Eva held out towards her and squeezed it briefly.
“I’m sorry, and, yes, I have been a bit weary. Perhaps the break is just what I need. However I will need to ask mother first–”
“Ask mother what?” Lady Belmont sailed across the room. She wore her favorite color of blue, and her hair was immaculately arranged. As usual, she presented an elegant picture. Her smile widened as she saw Georgia. “Give me that baby at once!”
“The duke and duchess are going to the country for a few days and wished my comp
any on their travels, Mother.” Claire realized she really wanted this break–nay, needed it.
Lady Belmont picked up Georgia and took the seat beside Simon as Claire poured her tea. “We have just received an invitation for the Botheringham house party, which is in three weeks, so perhaps a break now will do you good, Daughter. I think you should go with them and this delightful child.”
Claire felt her heart sink to her toes. House parties were horrible for her because if she was having a sleepless night, she was confined to her room in case other guests came across her wandering the halls in the early hours of the morning.
“We are all going to the Botheringhams’, aren’t we, Simon?” Eva said. “Lady Botheringham has asked that I bring Georgia, too.”
“I can hardly contain my excitement,” Simon drawled, looking at Claire.
Why, after so long in his acquaintance, was she struggling to find her usual poise? Because he saw you in that lane and he suspects something, although he’s not sure what. Suddenly, she felt exposed and vulnerable.
There was only one way to deter Simon and his suspicions, and that was to throw him off the scent. To do that, Claire needed to do what she always had. Provoke and challenge him, make him think of something other than seeing her in that lane.
“Of course you can barely contain your excitement, Lord Kelkirk–there will be everything you love at that house party.”
Simon uncrossed his knees and braced his hands on them, giving her his undivided attention. Grey eyes fixed on her face, he said, “And what do I love, Claire?”
Me. Claire had no idea where that thought came from and quickly banished it as ridiculous. “Flirtations, food, and attention.”
Eva and her mother laughed, as she had meant them to.
“You think you know me so well, Miss Belmont?”
He was smiling, yet his eyes were still serious, and Claire realized that, in all honesty, she didn’t know much about him other than what she saw when he was in public. She knew he was the most loyal of friends to Eva and Daniel, and that he would protect both of them and their daughter with whatever means it took, but what else was there to this man?