He shrugs playfully. “Usually.”
“You’re cute, but not that cute.” I stand in front of him with my arms crossed, challenging him to resist me. He won’t be able to for long…not if I do this right.
Hard to get. I need to play hard to get. I know I’m usually easy, but Drew…I wanted him to beg for it like he made me.
He crushes a hand to his heart. “Not that cute? Are you trying to kill my ego?”
“I’m sure it’s repairable. There ought to be hundreds of girls at your college willing to drop their panties for you.”
“College girls?” He shakes his head. “No thanks.”
I lean back, shocked. “Really? I pegged you for a college whore.”
“I do have standards, you know?”
“Well, good for you. So do I.” I reach around him to grab my door handle but he blocks me. “What? Now I can’t go home?”
He bumps his hip into my hand. “Not without me.”
“Desperation doesn’t look good on you, babe. Kind of a mood killer,” I quip, pushing him back so I can open the door.
“This isn’t desperate. This is a man going after what he wants. And if you’ll stop fighting it for one minute…” He grabs me and pins me to the car. “You’ll realize it’s what you want, too.” He stares intently at me, brushing my hair back behind my ears.
My body shivers at feeling his touch again, responding to him immediately, and giving myself away. I try to deny it, but it’s obvious my body craves more of him.
“And what is it you want, Drew? I can’t give you any of that relationship crap. I don’t commit, and I don’t let a guy control me, ever. You were my one exception, and it’s not going to happen again,” I say firmly, looking into his eyes so he takes me seriously.
“I’ll take you anyway I can get you, Doll. Whether it’s one more night…or a month. But I want it. I want all of it. I’m not a guy who begs, either. But I’m also not the type of guy to let something go that both of us need.”
He brings his hands to my neck, softly rubbing. He leans in brushing his lips against mine as if to ask for permission. I give in and kiss him, letting his tongue massage mine. I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him in closer to me. Having his strong hands on me makes me feel weak, as if his hands are meant to hold me up. His words repeat in my head, and for a minute, I doubt I can do this, but as his body presses harder against mine, feeling him and feeling my arousal for him, I know I can’t deny what my body truly wants—him.
“Get in,” I say, breaking the kiss.
I speed home, unable to think. I realize the less I think, the less I talk myself out of this. I like Drew. Well, I like him enough to invite him back to my apartment again.
I open the door and am relieved to see that Laney isn’t home. I hope this means she’s finally decided to talk to Eric.
“Well, come in,” I say, waving my hand inside. He slowly follows me in. I drop my bag and keys on the table.
“So, do I get to see it?” he asks, standing casually next to me.
I furrow my eyebrows at him. “See what?”
“Your vibrator,” he says plainly.
“Depends…”
“On what?”
“On if you plan to use it or not?”
“That depends…”
“On?”
“You.”
“On me, huh? Well, if you do the job right, I won’t need it at all.” I smirk.
He grabs me and hoists me in the air lifting me over his shoulders like a child.
“What the hell are you doing?” I screech, smacking his ass.
“You just challenged me. Now I must prove myself.”
“That wasn’t a challenge,” I defend. “Not that I mind, but really, it was just a statement.”
He sets me down as soon as we enter my bedroom. “Challenge or not…I’m not wasting another second.”
His eyes look hungry, desperate. He mouth is on mine before I can respond. His greedy hands are stripping my clothes off, throwing my shirt across the room, grabbing my zipper and yanking my pants down. He playfully throws me on the bed and pulls my panties down. I lay there willingly as I watch him. He lays over me, leaning his hands on the mattress to hold himself up, yet close enough to crash his mouth against mine.
I instantly wrap my legs around him, pulling him closer. He doesn’t budge, rather he brings his hands to his pants and unbuttons them. I bring one hand down and pull his dick out, ready and hard.
“Ohhh, fucking hell,” he moans as I wrap my hand around his hard cock. He kicks his pants the rest of the way down, brushing them away.
“I’m handcuffing you this time,” I say as I stroke him. I figure he can’t control me when I’m the one putting him in an orgasmic bliss.
“Unless you’re handcuffing me to you, I don’t think so, Doll.”
“Oh, you like it really kinky, don’t you?” I tease, biting his lip.
“I like anything with you.”
I bring my hands up and motion for him to take his shirt off. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this view.
“If you weren’t so fucking hot, I’d handcuff you to my bedpost and leave you there.”
“I’m glad to hear you like me for me,” he says in amusement. “However, I’m glad to hear you think so. Because I plan to use it against you as much as possible.”
“Unlikely,” I retort.
“And I plan to be against you as much as possible.” He grins.
“Yes. Yes…that one I agree with,” I say, laughing.
His smile is fucking amazing. It shows off his perfect white teeth, and when he’s really smiling, it practically reaches his eyes. The man has a great smile, ass and body. Basically, he has everything.
“I want you against the wall,” he mumbles in between kisses as I continue to stroke him again. “I won’t stop until every picture frame has fallen off.”
He hoists me up and releases my bra in one quick motion. He throws it behind him as his mouth finds my nipple. I sink into his touch, arching my back to give him as much access as possible.
“Oh god, that feels amazing,” I moan. His lips on me anywhere feels amazing, but when he kisses and pulls lightly on my breast with his teeth, it makes me explode at just the slightest touch.
His aggressive approach continues to turn me on, as much as I want to fight it and demand the control back. However, my body betrays me and gives in to his commands. He slams us into one of the walls and enters me immediately. I gasp at the sudden intrusion, but my body openly welcomes him.
I realize he’s not wearing a condom again and am prepared for him to pull out. But he doesn’t.
“Fuck, Doll. You feel so amazing.”
“Drew…” I pant, trying to make words come out.
He grabs my hands and pins them against the wall behind me above my head.
“I don’t want anything between us,” he says as if he reads my mind. “I promise I’m clean.”
“Are you sure?” I breathe out, worried.
“Yes, I swear. You’re on the pill?” he asks as if he already knows the answer.
“Of course.” As soon as the words come out, he pounds into me harder, making my head fall back at the amazing sensation that rivets between us.
“Good girl. I want to feel you, Carissa. All of you.”
His mouth is on mine again as he thrusts inside me—over and over, he gets deeper and harder—making it impossible to fight any emotions that begin to flood my heart.
I scream his name out as I climax, hard and aggressive. He makes sure I feel every second of it before milking his own release. My body surrenders to him as he continues holding me. His head falls on my shoulder as he presses light kisses up my neck.
“You feel amazing, Carissa. You are amazing,” he whispers in my ear. “I don’t want to give you up,” he growls.
I can feel my heart pounding out of my chest at his words. I don’t know what to say, so I don’t respond. I just let the moment
sink in, allowing the bliss and euphoria take over as I come down from the sensation.
We lay in bed for a while, saying nothing. He covers us up as we lay naked, my back pressed to his chest. I match my breathing with his, trying to organize the mess that’s now in my head.
He lightly brushes his fingers up and down my arm. It’s not like me to cuddle after sex, but for the first time ever, I’m actually enjoying it.
“Looks like you’re the one who needs the snuggling after,” I tease, breaking the silence.
“I’ll take any excuse to have you close to me,” he whispers in my ear. “Even if it’s torturous snuggling.”
I bust out laughing. “I’m glad you’re being tortured.”
“Oh, it’s not torture snuggling with you. It’s torture having your naked body pressed up against me and wanting you again, but knowing I have to wait for recovery. The snuggling I can handle, if necessary.”
“You’re just all kinds of romantic, aren’t you?” I quip. “First flowers, and now sentimental in bed?”
“I’m a man of many talents, Doll.” I can feel him smile against my shoulder.
“Guess that makes me lucky, huh?” I turn around to face him. I tilt my head as I examine his face—so perfect and structured.
“It makes me the fucking luckiest guy ever to be here with you. Even if you plan to kick me to the curb.” He smirks, pressing a hand to my cheek and rubbing it softly with his thumb.
I shrug casually. “No expectations here.”
“And why is that? Why do you have no expectations when it comes to men?”
“I’m not having that conversation, sorry.”
“C’mon. Tell me,” he insists.
“Sorry, but I don’t do personal. It’s easier that way, trust me.” I jerk my head out of his hand, suddenly feeling vulnerable.
He tilts my chin up to meet his eyes and says, “What ever it is, I can handle it. You can tell me. No judgments.”
“Shit, you’re persistent.”
He shrugs and winks. “I know how to get what I want.”
“Well, you’re getting the short version. That’s all.”
“And as usual, Doll, I’ll take what I can get.” He kisses me lightly on the lips. “So spill.”
I huff, really not wanting to get into details. I don’t know why Drew is different than my usual one-nighters. Perhaps it’s because he doesn’t judge me and takes me as I am.
“I had shit parents. I was only good enough to get them what they wanted—cigarettes, booze, groceries. They never took me out. Never spoiled me. My dad being sober was my Christmas present. My mom stripped for a living and stuck needles in her arms daily. The only time she wasn’t getting high or ripping her clothes off was on my birthdays, which was supposed to be my birthday present since they never bought me anything. So…in a nutshell. My parents should’ve never had me. Or been parents, period.”
“And what about the mate?” He barely flinches at my confession.
“Mate?”
“The one who screwed you over?”
“I was talking about my parents…in case you missed that part.”
“I heard. But that doesn’t give me any information on why you’ve closed men off your list? Or why you have the need to push men away? Or why—”
“There you go again, Dr. Phil.” I push a hand against his chest. “Enough with the questions. That’s all you’re getting tonight.”
“So there was a mate?” His eyebrows rise in suspicion.
“Isn’t there always?”
We lay in comfortable silence. I’m surprised how easy it feels to open up to him, even though I didn’t tell him everything. It’s more than I’ve ever told any guy before though, so I guess that’s a start. However, I’m not sure what it means. I don’t open up to men. Ever.
10
I wake up to an unfamiliar smell. And an empty bed. I shift and realize the bed is still warm where Drew was laying. I look down and see I’m still naked. Guess I never bothered to get dressed last night.
Flashes of last night enter my mind—sex, great sex and then opening up to Drew about my past. Well, opening up a little. I didn’t give him much and that’s a good thing. That’s all he’s getting, period.
I’ve had my fun with Drew. Now it’s time to kick his ass out and tell him to get lost. If I let him in any more, he’ll just get too comfortable and weasel his way in. And what I’ve seen of Velaney’s experience—and various heartbroken sob stories from Julia and Kenna—I don’t want to get too close to the relationship status.
Watching Jake tear Velaney’s walls down, and then just gutting her like a fish, left her wrecked for months. I picked up the pieces, glued them back together, and got her back on her feet. He wasn’t worth the tears in my opinion, but Laney clung to him like a damn guppy. Watching her just reinstates why I don’t let guys in. Why give them the chance to hurt you at all? Just take what you really want, and in the end, everyone leaves happy.
I grab a shirt and a pair of shorts before heading out into the kitchen. I see Drew—a shirtless Drew—standing by the stove, cooking something up.
I lean casually against the doorframe, watching his every move as his back muscles flex with each solid movement. Fuck me. Rugby player. Hot as sin. British accent. Am I really kicking this guy out?
“Good morning, Doll,” he says without even turning around.
“What? You have eyes in the back of your head, too?”
“I have very good senses.” He finally turns around, flashing his gorgeous smile. “Kind of have to when I’m on the field, ya know?”
“I’m sure you do. However, it kind of adds to your creep factor.”
“I’ll take it.” He grins, crossing his arms over his chest.
“So what exactly are you making? It smells horrible.” I sit across from him on the breakfast bar.
“Poached eggs with fried mushrooms, sausage, toast, and tea. Would you like some?” he asks genuinely.
I wrinkle my nose. “Why?”
“Why?” he asks amused. “Well, because it’s morning. And typically, you eat breakfast in the morning.” He leans over the bar, inching closer to me.
“Yes, I’m aware.” I shoot him an annoyed look. “Why are you making breakfast at my house?”
“Where would you like me to make it?”
“Preferably, at your own house. This smell is going to be here for days.”
“Ah, the cold shoulder.” He smirks, leaning back.
I tilt my head. “No…the morning-after brush off. There’s a difference.”
“Really? Enlighten me. What’s the difference?” He spins around to turn the stovetop off.
“Why are you still here?” I ask bluntly, ignoring his question.
“I need a ride to my car, but I can take a taxi if you’d like.” His eyes are strong, holding mine. However, I can tell he’s ready to back down if I invite him to stay.
“I’ll grab my keys.” I make sure to keep eye contact with him, challenging him to break down first.
I slip my shoes on and open the door, waving him out into the hallway. My neighbor across the hall, Collins, leaves his apartment at the same time. We exchange quick hellos before Drew grabs my hand as we walk down the hall, making this goodbye a lot more intimate than I want. I don’t know how to brush him off, although I know I need to.
One night with a man is easy. Quick and done. Two nights, still easy. Hello, goodbye. Done and done. But anything after that will start to get complicated. And I have a feeling this just went from quick and done to super complicated.
I drop him off at his car and say a quick goodbye. He grabs my face and slowly leans in before brushing his lips against mine.
“Goodbye, Carissa,” he says just above a whisper. I can tell he knows it’s the last goodbye. I can sense he knows. And yet, it breaks my heart.
I drive back home, pretending I’m unaffected. I push him out of my head as I need to get ready for the day.
I walk bac
k into my apartment, smelling the breakfast Drew made. I walk to my bedroom where the sheets are piled at the foot of the bed and my clothes from last night are still spiraled on the floor. I close my eyes as I inhale his familiar scent that continues to linger in the air. I open them back up and spot the wall that he pinned me against—the part of the wall that made my body go completely undone around him.
And then I know.
He’s affected me.
I rip off my sheets and gather my dirty clothes from the floor. I make a pile and throw them by the outside door. I frantically clean the kitchen, throwing out any evidence of his presence. I even toss the damn cooking pan that he was cooking with, needing all memories and reminders gone.
Once I’m fully satisfied that everything he’s touched is gone, I get ready for my shift.
* * *
I walk in to work with extra confidence. I can do this. I push any thoughts of Drew out of my head as I begin serving customers. It’s slow at first, but as soon as the late afternoon hits, we get slammed.
Julia and Kenna are both working with me. Laney’s taken some time off, so drowning myself in work is always best when things are clogging up my mind.
We work swiftly through the evening. I work my charm on customers as the drunker they get, the easier it is to manipulate them into giving me bigger tips. I do quite well and end the evening with a couple hundred in tips.
“Damn, girl. You did good tonight,” Kenna remarks, looking at my pile of cash sitting in front of me on the bar.
“Sure did. The girls usually help with that.” I smirk, pointing down at my breasts.
“So what’s the game plan tonight, ladies? Going home or shall we have a ladies night of our own?” Julia asks, waving around a bottle of tequila.
It’s after bar hours, and we could get our asses in huge trouble for staying after, but we all nod frantically as Julia begins pouring us shots.
After a couple shots, we all have the case of the giggles. It feels really good to laugh with them. My mind is free and my body feels loose.
“Okay…okay!” I shout over their laughter. “Time to play…‘I Never.’”
“Oh my god…no way! You’ll get trashed, Carissa!” Kenna laughs.
FLAME (Spark Series) Page 9