by Bonnie Vanak
“I am Seelie Sidhe of the Los Lobos colony, guardians of the Orb of Light. I am pure and honorable, a protector of nature and innocents. I will never defy the land, nor bring shame to my people. I embrace all living things good and natural, and walk with honor.”
But the pledge sounded hollow to her ears. Walk with honor? Tim had not. One of her own kind!
Exhausted, confused, she needed to eat, regain her composure. Which was she?
Draicon or Fae?
Was either species truly honorable?
Lieutenant Matthew Parker certainly was. His actions dictated it. Tim may have recited the oath along with every other colony member, but it had been a lie.
Matt lived the oath of honor with every step he took.
And yet he was Draicon, like the man who’d fathered her, and then killed her mother.
Could she ever trust a Draicon?
Sounds of the shower began. Matt was so quiet, she hadn’t heard him wake up. An image, unbidden and erotic, filled her mind. He was soaping himself, running the bar along those smooth, taut muscles, water beading off his sun-darkened skin. His head flung back, eyes closed, growling with pleasure as she fell to her knees, removed the soap from his hands and began lathering him much lower…
No longer cold, Sienna gulped down a breath.
As a distraction, she paced the kitchen. It was pretty, homey and welcoming. Layered through the air was a scent of love and deep affection that pulled at her in deep yearning. It was the type of cozy house she’d always envisioned for herself.
“Hey.”
Dressed in jeans and barefoot, he stood in the doorway, hair slicked back, droplets beading the thick waves. The bandages were gone from his now-healed wounds. A long-sleeved flannel shirt hung open, showing a muscled abdomen strong enough to break bricks. Dark hair feathered his chest, arrowing down his stomach and vanishing into the waistband of the jeans.
Arousal filled her as she thought about following that line much lower. Her body loosened with want and yearning. Sienna felt warm and open.
His pupils darkened as he swept his gaze over her. Matt’s nostrils flared. He’d scented her desire.
She licked her lips. “There’s no meat here. Um, I mean, nothing here to eat…and I’m hungry.”
“Me, too,” he said, his voice hoarse as he stared at her wet mouth.
He pushed back at his damp hair. “Let me get dressed, and we’ll go out for a quick bite. I saw a sandwich shop around the corner.”
* * *
When they reached the restaurant, she ordered a hamburger with cheese and an order of fries. Matt paid for their purchases and brought them over to a quiet table by the window, facing the door.
He always had his back to the wall, facing whoever walked inside. Tension tightened his body, but not from the hot encounter with the pyro demon.
Nope, this tension was purely sexual from something equally smoking hot. He watched with avid hunger as Sienna poured ketchup over a fry and delicately licked it off with her small, pink tongue. Thinking about what delights that tongue could deliver…
Desire heated his blood until all he could think about was how much he wanted this woman in his bed. How much he wanted to bury himself deep inside her, driving into her until she clung to him and screamed, and all the animosity between them became animal passion.
Big mistake. He lowered his gaze and dove into his hamburger.
They had the dining area to themselves. Still, he kept a guarded eye on the street. Small houses dotted the lane, some with bicycles scattered over the driveways. It was a solid family area, known among his kind as a safe zone. Draicon lived here among humans.
His gaze shot back to Sienna, who was devouring her burger with zest.
“I thought Fae were vegans.”
She stifled a burp with her hand and gave an apologetic look. Damn, she was so cute, so charming.
So Fae.
Matt took another bite, grimly concentrating on his other, more appeasable hunger.
“I’m starved. I guess everything caught up to me.”
“I didn’t know Fae ate meat. I thought all they liked were sprouts. Except the ones who have an appetite for killing.”
Guilt shadowed her expression. She bent her head, studying the red basket containing her fries. “I doubt it.” Sienna glanced around. “We can talk openly here, right?”
Matt nodded.
“I want to know something.” Her fingers curled around the basket’s edge. “Tell me, how did Adam die?”
His stomach tightened. Out of all the questions he’d anticipated, it wasn’t this. As appealing as the hamburger had been, it turned to cardboard in his stomach.
“Please. I need to know.”
“Why?”
Direct, commanding, curt. She raised her chin.
“Maybe that will help me understand why you hate my people.”
Fair enough. Though he doubted it would change anything. They were too opposite. Too different in their worlds.
Matt closed his eyes, seeing the sand swirl around him, feeling it sting his face. Smelling the heat and the arid air, the sharp tang of metal. He told the story, each word slicing open wounds that were still fresh. When he got to the part where Adam died, he struggled to speak.
“The pyrokinetic demons caught up with Adam outside. I heard him…”
Scream.
Moisture filled Sienna’s eyes. She slid a hand over the table, but Matt pulled back. He couldn’t let her touch him. Couldn’t break apart.
“You tried to help. You were amazingly brave in facing the demons. You did the best you could,” she said gently.
“It wasn’t enough.”
The image came back to him, searing pain from the burns, shoving down the oily panic clogging his throat as he lapsed into unconsciousness.
“When I regained consciousness, I didn’t dare radio back for help. The Darksider Fae could be imitating any one of the troops. Shay was on standby. Called him and made him give me the code of our squad. He came and fetched me, did a glamour so it looked like I was fine. Our C.O.—you met him, Lieutenant Commander Curtis—made sure I had private quarters to recover. Then he did a cleanse of everyone who’d come into contact with Adam. No one remembered him, or that he’d ever come to Afghanistan.”
“Oh, Matt,” she said softly. “That must have been horrible.”
Here was the one person he could talk to about Adam. Sienna, a stranger, who silently forged the connection he’d needed back on the subway. The safety clicked off his hard-won control. Words burst out of him like machine-gun fire.
“It was as if he’d never existed. He was my swim buddy. We went through BUD/S together—we were teammates, best friends. I was closer to him than my own family. I was there at his mating ceremony. And I couldn’t even be there at his damn funeral because I had to pretend I never knew him. Because no one is supposed to know about the Phoenix Force. So when we die, all memories die with us.”
A stray tear escaped, sliding down Sienna’s perfect cheek. Seeing her cry for Adam made him no longer feel alone in his grief, but also made him protective. Made him want to cup her face in his hands and kiss away her tears. He hated seeing her cry. Matt lifted a hand, then dropped it. Gods, he felt so damned confused lately.
“What about his body?”
“We made a promise in the team. No man gets left behind. Shay returned for Adam, but couldn’t find anything. The pyro demons had reduced him to ash, and his ashes had been taken by the wind. There was nothing left of him to return to Tatiana, his widow. Nothing.”
After wiping her eyes with a napkin, Sienna covered his hand with her own. “I’m sorry, Matt, for what the Darksider Fae did to you. To Adam.”
First-name basis. No more Lieutenant Parker. And she’d said Adam’s name again. He struggled against the urge to kiss her senseless in thanks and took a long pull of his water.
Backhanding his mouth, he shook his head. “I should have saved my buddy. We were tight. Alwa
ys watched each other’s backs.”
She stroked his wrist, her thumb making little circles. Always calm and cool, his rare outburst was alarming. It was Sienna, her soft, sweet smile and genuine air of concern. She dug beneath his defenses, past the emotional berm he’d erected since Adam’s death.
“Too crowded in here,” he muttered, glancing around. “Let’s get back. I’ll arrange for transport, airline tickets.”
“To New Mexico?”
Matt nodded. “Home of your friend Tim. I’ll do some initial recon…”
As she gave him a questioning look, he sighed. “Reconnaissance. Scout out the shop and the lay of the land for a couple of days. And then move in. If the pyro demons know he has the Orb, those guys aren’t patient. I need to retrieve it before they do.”
* * *
Back at the house, Sienna watched Matt type on his laptop. Since returning, he’d been quiet and aloof. When he snapped the computer shut, she waved a hand.
“Hello? Remember me? The one who’s working with you?”
He gave her a long, cool look. “Not anymore. The stakes have changed. I know who has the Orb, and how to get it back. I’m sending you home.”
A quivering began in her belly. Sienna took a controlling breath. “Not so fast. I understand you’re angry at my people.”
Matt remained silent.
“But I didn’t steal the Orb. We’re a team in this, got it? Those were the terms. We both get the Orb and I show my people it’s safe once more.”
A bitter laugh escaped him. “Safe for how long? Your people did a helluva job guarding it. It’s because of them Adam’s dead.”
Sienna’s throat tightened. She felt his anger, his pain and frustration. But she had to convince him to let her stay. If he forced her return, he’d wipe her memories….
Her precious memories.
Worse, the name of her people would be forever smeared with disgrace. Now more than ever, it was crucial she finish this task and restore their honor.
Sienna took his palm and unfolded it, studying the rough calluses and strong fingers. “The Fae believe that when someone dies and their ashes are scattered to the four winds, it doesn’t mean that person is lost. He then becomes part of the earth and part of every living thing. That’s what became of Adam. He lives on in every breath of wind, in the laughter of every child.”
Silence draped the air. His shoulders relaxed, losing the tightly wound tension that knotted them. He lifted his face, his eyes very blue.
“All Fae are not evil,” she said gently. “Even the Unseelie, the Dark Fae, have their good side. The Darksider Fae are rogue, but they are few and live outside the boundaries and clan system of Fae. We Seelie Sidhe Fae are secluded and insular, but compassionate. We respect all living beings.”
His gaze sharpened. “A compassionate people. Then what put the chip on your shoulder about me, Sienna? About werewolves?”
Dropping his hand, she studied the tips of her faded sneakers. Fae preferred bare feet, touching the earth to maintain contact. She never had.
“Hey.” A firm hand cradled her chin, lifting it upward. His palm was warm and strong. “Tell me. What did we do to you?”
The gentleness of his touch made her toes curl inside the sneakers. Sienna took a deep breath for courage. Maybe if he knew, he’d cut her a break and let her stay.
“I’m not pure-blooded Sidhe. I’m only a half-breed. Half Fae and half Draicon.”
At his startled look, she yanked away and grated out the damned truth. “Mothered by a Fae from the Los Lobos colony, and fathered by a Draicon who raped her…and then killed her when his pack came back to try to claim me.”
Panic squeezed her heart as flashes of the past emerged, like a rapid slideshow. “Probably killed her when he raided the Fae colony to get me.”
“Sweet gods. How old were you?” His voice was gentle, contrasting with the hard edges of his expression.
“I think around five, maybe four. I don’t remember that much.”
“No wonder you dislike Draicon.”
Dislike was a lukewarm term. For years she’d hated them. It was a relief to finally talk about what happened. Among her people, it had been an ugly secret no one ever discussed. “It’s so much easier to hate than try to understand. It’s fueled me for so long that it’s hard to let go.”
“Hate does that to you. It feeds you power to seek justice.” Matt’s expression tightened. “You were just a little thing. I’d kill the bast…the Draicon who did that to your mother. Did she ever say who it was?”
“I don’t remember much. I’ve tried.” Hands curled tight, she watched her knuckles whiten. “Aunt Chloe rescued me during the attack. The Fae beat back the Draicon pack. I think…they killed my father. I don’t know! I want to know, but I can’t remember.” Misery knotted her throat. “I have snatches of dreams, of images. Chloe told me when the time was right, I’d learn the truth. About what, and who, I really am. But I know what I am. The daughter of a vicious killer.” Her voice dropped to a bare whisper. “So what does that make me?”
Compassion flared in his gaze. “You’re Sienna McClare. What your parents were isn’t important. It’s what you make of yourself that counts.”
“That’s why the Orb is so important to me. If I find it and bring it back, my people will accept me back into their colony.”
At his incredulous look, she sighed. “They turned me out on my twenty-first birthday, because I’m a hybrid and don’t belong. I do belong, and once I prove my loyalty to their side, I will.”
“Is that what you truly want?” he asked quietly.
“More than anything. I need my people. They’re all I’ve ever known. With them I’ll feel…”
Connected.
“Wolves aren’t so bad, either,” he murmured. Matt stroked a thumb along her jawline. “Draicon. No Fae could pull off that effective a glamour with scent, as well. I knew there was something sweet about your scent.”
A half smile touched her mouth. “That’s my Fae half.”
His gaze locked on her lips. “So sweet,” he murmured.
He’d put his life before her own. Gotten burned, cushioned her fall, kept her safe. For so long, she’d functioned on her own, accustomed to fending for herself. Not one single Fae had risked his life for her.
She thought about how much she wanted to draw close. Feel that tensile strength holding her close, the slight abrasion of his day whiskers against her soft cheek.
As he leaned down to kiss her, Sienna closed her eyes.
She sighed on a breath as his mouth met hers. It was a sweet kiss, his lips warm and soft. He was gentle, his mouth reverent as if he held back, waiting for her. All the other kisses from the few Fae males had been cold, lacking in passion and tenderness. Sienna wanted more. When she parted her lips and licked his mouth, he deepened the kiss. He tasted like the most exquisite wine, of moonlit nights and dazzling starlight. The kiss melted her bones and spoke of sheer need, a painful longing finally met.
Her senses spun as he slid his arms about her waist. It was breathtaking and dizzying, searing her with wicked heat. Sienna clung to him, feeling the thick muscles of his wide shoulders, the sheer solidness of the man.
She was hot, her clothing constricting her, needing to get bare, feel his skin warm and smooth against hers…needing more, needing his mouth against her body. Needing him to lay her on a soft, wide bed and take her as a man takes a woman.
Sweet mercy.
Alarmed, she pulled back, breathing hard. Surrendering to desire for him meant surrendering all hope of belonging to her colony. She couldn’t align herself with any wolf.
Not even an honorable navy SEAL who’d risked his life for her.
“Stop it. Leave me alone.” She pulled out of his arms.
“Sienna, talk to me.”
Shaking her head, she retreated into the bathroom. Sienna closed the door and leaned against it. Gods, what had she done? It should have been just a kiss.
Bu
t it felt like so much more.
Chapter 5
The city of Santa Fe was pretty and artsy and normally Sienna would have enjoyed seeing the sights. But not now.
Sienna paced the lobby of the elegant downtown hotel as Matt dealt with the front desk. Wide sofas with a taupe and sienna Indian print were scattered around the luxurious lobby. A distressed wood round table held a welcoming pitcher of fruit punch and crystal glasses. It was very upscale and luxurious.
Something about this city, despite its charming, artistic flair, screamed danger. Beneath the exciting energy and charm, she sensed an undertone of unusual darkness. She couldn’t tell if it was real, or her imagination.
Somehow, she was losing the Fae ability to sort truth from fiction. And if she lost that ability, what was next?
The more time she spent with Matt, the less Fae she became. The flare of attraction between them proved too much. Too confusing. Too upsetting. Once she was inside her room, she’d change back to her Fae form.
Sienna clenched her hands as Matt turned, swinging his heavy duffel bag over one shoulder and lifting her suitcase as if it weighed no more than a lunch box.
“The key to my room, please.”
He gave her a cool look. “We’re sharing.”
Dumbfounded, she gaped at him.
“I’ll take the sofa. I’ve slept in much worse.” He began climbing the stairs.
She scurried after him. “I can’t stay with you.”
“I warned you, no going solo. You’re sticking with me at all times.”
Gritting her teeth, she waited until they ascended to the second floor. As he set the bags down and inserted the room key into the lock, she grabbed his arm. Smooth muscles rippled beneath warm skin. Matt raised an eyebrow.
“I can’t stay with you. I need my own room. Besides, aren’t we supposed to be brother and sister?”
His mouth was a grim slash. “After what happened in Forrest Plains, no way, pixie. I registered us as a couple staying together. I’ve agreed to let you stay on this op and I’ve been charged with your care and protection. What I protect, I don’t ever desert. Got it?”
The door swung open. He gave her a gentle but firm push inside.