But once wasn’t enough this time. He was forced to watch it again, in that state of slow-motion that was agonizing and terrible. He couldn’t turn or close his eyes.
The raft glided toward the head-high, jagged spike, thrusting Chloe right at the apex. As the raft turned, the stone slashed her skin below the rim of the helmet, slicing her forehead open. The impact knocked the paddle out of her hand, and she fell onto her back. Blood gushed from her head, pouring down her face and washing over her suit as she collapsed onto the raft. Dark red swirled with the clear water filling their boat.
Josh’s face was frozen, eyes wide and his mouth agape. Jade’s delicate features were twisted into a terrified expression, although she hadn’t yet seen the wound. But worst among the statues, frozen in time, was the blankness on Chloe’s face. Either she was unconscious or something far worse.
And then it happened again.
Cam wanted to lunge to his sister’s aid, to catch her falling body—even to scream would have been something. But as his mind protested the sight, his body was unable to respond. He watched the scene, his stomach turning at the sight of her blood.
Again. And again.
If the point of the rock had been two inches higher, it would have glanced off the top of her helmet. Each time, he willed some aspect to change: her to move or the raft to dip below that spike. But it had already happened, and he couldn’t change history.
Instead, he had to watch in horror as it unfolded, each time with the same gruesome end. It was by far the worst thing he’d ever had to relive. Contrary to a normal, one-time episode, he was caught in some sort of déjà vu loop, like that first day with the snowboard accident. He couldn’t blink and wake up, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t escape.
Stop, Stop, STOP! he commanded, but it was only in his mind.
With each replay, new and intricate details became clear, but they only made it worse. He didn’t want a perfect memory of the moment. Other worries nagged at him. How many seconds, minutes, or hours had he been missing from the present, trapped and incapacitated like a character stuck inside a TV show? Had Chloe been helped? What if she was knocked into the river while unconscious? What if the cycle never ended? What might happen to his sister while he was trapped inside his own mind?
It did finally end, though. Cam woke disoriented. He looked around, trying to get a handle on his new location.
He was no longer in the moving raft. The hard, lumpy ground jabbed into his back, and the river roared nearby, loud in his ears. Chaos was unfolding all around him. Was this real? It had to be, because his super-senses were gone.
He saw Jade first, convulsing in the arms of one of the guides, wrought with fits of sobs that were only interrupted by intermittent, violent bursts of shrieking. The middle-aged man from their raft was pacing, his face plastered with a look of deep anxiety. The other guide ran back and forth between the raft, now tethered along the riverbank, and another spot about twenty feet away. There, Josh and the older woman from the raft were kneeling over a body on the ground. Chloe.
No!
Cam stood and stumbled across to the place where her limp body lay. Someone had pulled off her helmet. Josh held a bloody piece of cloth to the gash on his sister’s forehead. Chloe’s eyes were closed, and one side of her face was covered with a crusting layer of dark purple.
“It’s all right, she’s alive,” the woman said. Josh’s jaw was clenched and he didn’t speak, just met Cam’s eyes. When Cam saw Chloe’s chest moving in and out, he breathed a sigh of relief and knelt down on the rocky ground next to her. Taking her small, limp hand in his, he squeezed his eyes shut and prayed with all his might. Please God, keep my sister safe. Please take care of her. Keep her alive and let her be all right.
~
Trust. It was how Ethan made his catch.
Flickering rays of candlelight lit the small church, casting a dim glow about the place. A handful of people, mostly women, were scattered inside, lighting candles and praying silently in the pews. None of them noticed when he slid through the doorway, shutting out the blackness of night as the heavy door thudded softly behind him. Surreptitiously, he slipped off the dark glasses he often wore and stowed them in his pocket.
Head bent in contrition, he approached the table off to the side, stopping next to a dark-haired woman. A faint aroma of Mexican food mixed with a sweet, apple smell made his nostrils tingle. After a moment of hesitation, he lit a candle, looking away as the flame flared bright. He placed it amongst the other flaming votives, feeling their combined heat on his hand. Pulling his arm away, he took several deep breaths as a tear trailed its way slowly down his cheek.
A soft touch on his shoulder made him look over at the woman standing next to him.
“Are you all right?” she asked.
He nodded and looked down in pensive silence. After a moment she spoke again.
“Would you like to talk about it?”
Ethan shrugged. “I guess it couldn’t hurt.” He followed her back to one of the pews. They were shrouded in shadows. She waited for him to speak.
“Do you come here very often?” he asked once they were seated.
“Yes. I find that coming regularly helps me find sanity in life. How about you?”
“Only when I need peace.”
“Peace is something we all could use more of. Are you going through a tough situation right now?”
“A divorce,” he said, looking down at his hands knotted together in his lap.
“I’m so sorry.” She placed a comforting hand on his arm. “I’ve been there myself, two years ago. It’s not fun.”
“No,” he agreed.
“Have you tried counseling?”
“I think we’re past the point of help.”
“Really?”
“She had an affair.”
“That’s horrible.”
“She wants us to stay together, but I just don’t know how I can. How can I be with her after that?”
She shook her head. “She must have been crazy to cheat on you. I don’t blame you for wanting a divorce.” She patted his knee. “You have every right.”
“What made her do it? Was it me?” he asked, looking into the woman’s face for an answer.
“No. Don’t be silly. Of course it wasn’t you.” She took his hand and held it between hers. “You can’t start thinking that way.”
Ethan gulped down a sob and looked back down into his lap.
“Listen,” she continued, “do you want to get a cup of coffee?” She glanced around at the visitors in their vicinity. “Somewhere that we can talk privately?”
He looked back at her, his eyes moist. “Sure, that would be great.”
“What’s your name?”
“Adam,” he said with a soft smile.
Catch made.
In such a short time, he had already gained her trust. Sometimes it was too easy. But it wasn’t about the catch. It was about what came next.
Cam wrung his hands as he rode in the ambulance with Chloe to St. Thomas Moore Hospital. It was torture to see her incapacitated and vulnerable. Worse still was his own complete helplessness. He was supposed to be her protector. He felt like a failure. Recurring memories from his recent episode haunted him, mocking his insignificance in the matter.
He stared at her face, her entire forehead obscured by a large bandage. The medics had hastily dressed her wound, but a small patch of red had soaked through part of the bandage. Cam couldn’t stop picturing her once-smooth temple marred with the bloody gash.
The trip felt longer than the actual ten minutes it took. When they arrived, the medics wheeled her to a small holding area separated by only a curtain from the other patients. He stood by her side the whole time, hand on her arm, willing her to stay with him.
Josh entered with a worried expression.
“Where’s Jade?” Cam asked.
“She’s outside.”
“In the waiting room?”
“No
. Outside the building.”
Cam sent his brother a questioning look.
“Apparently she has something against hospitals.”
“Oh.”
Josh stared at Chloe for a moment longer and started pacing, a frown creasing his brow. Abruptly, he stopped and looked at Cam.
“What?”
“I think one of us should take her home,” Josh said.
“Who—Chloe?”
“No. Jade.”
“Is it that bad?” Cam asked.
“I’m not sure what the deal is, but she’s really freaked out.”
Cam looked back at his sister. “I need to stay with Chloe. Would you take her home?”
For a moment, Josh looked like he was going to argue, but then he sighed. “Okay.”
“Thanks.”
“Call me if anything happens, okay? If you find out anything.”
“Yeah. I will.”
Josh gave Chloe a last glance, patted her hand, and left the room.
~
For the third time, Jade tried to enter the hospital, but the minute her foot was past the ER doors, feelings of self-loathing surged around her. She halted in the waiting room, fighting with all her might. Hoping for a distraction, she let her gaze flick to each person in the room: a mother with a crying child, an elderly man behind a walker, a very pregnant woman squeezing the hand of her husband. Jade got snippets of other emotions—a thin layer of fear, short bursts of anxiety, and a faint trace of anticipation. But the depression dominated, a thick fog that edged into every crack in her mind, telling her life was hopeless.
Why was she here? Chloe had been hurt, but why did it matter? Why did anything matter? Jade wanted to shrivel up and die, to close her eyes and be rid of the world and everything in it for good. Her lids drooped as the thought came. If she killed herself, she wouldn’t have to deal with emotions anymore. She would finally have the peace she’d longed for. Her eyes shot wide. No! Those weren’t her feelings—she had to fight them. I don’t want to die. It might feel like it, but that’s not me talking, it’s someone else. It’s… She spotted a teen guy with long, stringy, black hair and bloodshot eyes sitting next to a woman that looked like his mom. He hung his head and stared at the floor.
Spotting the kid didn’t make the feelings stop, and though she tried to distance herself mentally, to convince herself it was that guy who was depressed and not her, it didn’t help. She felt hollowed out inside, like the empty shell of a decaying jack-o’-lantern, with no purpose, no drive, and no desire for anything. The fog thickened, pulling her down. She swayed and grabbed the arm of the nearest chair, but not in time.
He knees buckled and she went down. Falling hard on her rear made her gasp and shot pain through her like electricity. The jolt woke her, and for a split-second, she was in control again. She scrambled up off the floor, refusing to make eye contact with anyone in the waiting room, guessing most were staring at her, and ran for the door to outside. The faint voice of the woman at the admitting counter called after her, asking if she needed help, but Jade didn’t answer.
The feelings lessened once she was outside, and diminished even further when she sank against one of the brick walls and the automatic door closed. She breathed deeply for a few minutes, exhaling the tainted feelings a little at a time. Finally she calmed.
Why was it that when she thought things were going well, all hell broke loose? She’d grown confident lately, using Cam as a shield against the turbulent emotions all around her. But that strategy didn’t always work. When Chloe had been hurt, Cam’s emotions were as bad as everyone else’s—a new flavor of anxiety and a deeper, more intense pain. And she hadn’t been with Cam that day in the woods when she’d encountered the bear.
She wasn’t sure which had frightened her more—the bear or that strange creature exuding rage of an intensity she’d never known. Jade hadn’t told anyone about what had happened to her, not even her mom. How could she? It didn’t make any sense, and she was pretty sure talking about it would make her sound like a lunatic. She might have thought she was crazy if those emotions weren’t so vibrant in her memory.
The hospital door slid open, and for a moment the self-loathing wafted her way again. Jade tensed, but soon the door closed, and when Josh walked up to her, she let out the breath she’d been holding.
“You okay?” Josh’s anxiety was tolerable compared to what was inside the waiting room.
“I think so. I’m sorry—I should be in there with Chloe.”
“It’s okay, she has Cam. Why don’t I take you home?”
Jade hesitated, finding only concern in his dark eyes. “Okay. Thanks.”
She clung to his emotions all the way home, not because they were reassuring or peaceful, but because sharing his worry for his sister was the only way Jade could think to absolve herself of her own guilt for leaving Chloe.
~
The waiting was the worst part for Cam. Doctors and nurses were in and out to monitor Chloe’s wound and vitals, but it was thirty, maybe forty minutes between each visit. They gave him no clues to her status. His only solace was that her chest continued to rise and fall.
The minutes ticked by as he stared at her, his heart in turmoil. Finally, almost two hours later, the doctor on duty came to tell him they had to take her to do an MRI. They wheeled her bed from the room and out of sight.
More restless now that she was gone, he paced the room. A figure entered the curtained area, and when Cam saw Josh’s face, he breathed a deep sigh. “Hey.”
“Do you know anything yet?” Josh asked.
“No.”
“Where is she?”
“MRI.”
Josh nodded silently. “I called Mom and Dad. They’ll be up as soon as they can.”
“Good,” Cam said. “Thanks for taking Jade home.”
The brothers stood in silence with no words to express their feelings, staring at the mottled, gray floor tiles. After a few minutes, a nurse returned with Chloe, rolling her bed into its spot in front of them. Cam watched as Josh greeted her silently, stepping close to the bed and placing his hand on hers. He didn’t speak, but seemed to exude unspoken emotions.
It was another hour before a doctor came in to give them the results. Chloe’s head wound had caused a small amount of bleeding on her brain. The unthinkable question was whether or not there was a chance of brain damage. But until Chloe’s state improved, there would be no way to know for sure.
Cam refused to leave Chloe’s side, spending the night in an undersized, uncomfortable recliner in one corner of her room. He met the barrage of nurses, doctors, and visitors that came to check on her.
Early before dawn the next morning, he was awakened by the sound of stirring close by. His eyes shot open and he leapt out of the recliner, dashing to Chloe’s side. Her head rolled slowly from one side to the other and then her eyelids flickered.
“Chloe… Chloe.” He spoke softly, watching for a response.
Her eyelids opened and her head turned at the sound of her name. She met his gaze for a brief moment. Then her lids drooped and closed again.
She was awake later that afternoon when Charles and Marie Schuyler were there. Nurses were in and out, monitoring her vitals and giving good reports. Seeing her smiling and talking was a relief, and fears of brain trauma were gone. Soon she was eating with gusto and even moving around on her own. Cam continued to stay with her in the hospital, refusing to leave except to grab takeout. She teased him, telling him to go home and take a shower because he was starting to stink. Still he refused. It wasn’t worth driving an hour and a half both ways just for a shower.
From that point on, Chloe’s recovery was swift. On Thursday evening Cam was sitting in the recliner next to her, the two of them watching television, as happy and comfortable as if they were back at home.
A knock at the door interrupted the show. Cam got up to answer it. “Jade!” he said, throwing his arms around her. It had been too long since he’d seen her. “I thou
ght you didn’t do hospitals.”
“Not usually, but I needed to see Chloe.”
“Hi, Jade!” Chloe called from across the room.
“How are you doing?” Jade asked.
“I’m great. Other than these horrible staples in my forehead. I’m going to have some pretty nasty scars after this whole thing is over.”
“Does it hurt?” Jade asked.
“No,” Chloe said, then hesitated. “Not at all.”
“That’s good.”
“Yeah…” Chloe’s voice trailed off, and she seemed lost in thought. “It’s weird though, you’d think that it would hurt… a little at least.”
“Are you on any pain medication?” Jade asked.
“No. I haven’t needed anything since Tuesday.”
“She’s been a quick healer,” Cam said. “The MRI this afternoon showed that the blood on her brain is totally gone. The doctors say she’s healed great. If nothing changes for the worse, they’re going to let her come home tomorrow.”
“That’s awesome!” Jade said. “I bet your parents miss you.”
“Actually, they’ve been here to visit every day,” Cam said. “You missed them—they left a little while ago. They’ll be on the road a few hours and wanted to get back before dark.”
“I bet they’re ready for you to come home,” Jade said.
“Probably. But actually, I’m going to stay with Cam for a few more days before I go back to Denver. After all, he still has a free room until Sunday, and I’m not going to let a stupid accident ruin our week together.”
“I’m going to keep an eye on her and make sure she obeys the doctor’s orders and rests—‘no physical excursion.’”
Chloe looked at Jade. “I’d really love to hang out if you have any free time. You should come over to the house this weekend.”
Jade smiled. “Of course. Maybe I’ll bring dinner one night. I’m not sure if you’d have much to eat with the guys cooking for you.”
Empath: The Flawed Series Book One Page 9