When Aunty Lindy died, I shut myself off to any kind of emotion. Losing Dad had cut me pretty deep, but losing the woman who had raised me nearly cut me in half.
Being all open and telling people you loved them…telling them how you really felt, that only led to heartache, because you lost them and you were left with this gaping, raw wound that never really healed. The best thing to do was be numb to everything.
I’d resisted telling Rachel I loved her, like if I let it slip, I’d somehow jinx it. Even so, she’d made me feel again, and that’s why I had to believe she’d be coming back, because I wouldn’t recover from losing her, too.
I pulled out a chair and slumped into it. Cracking open my can of beer, I pressed it to my lips and drained half of it before slapping it onto the table.
Brock ambled over to my side and took a seat. “She ain’t the only girl in the world, Grizz.”
“She’s the only girl for me.”
Of that, I was sure.
I couldn’t guarantee if or when she’d come back, but that girl owned my heart and that wasn’t ever changing.
Chapter Ten
Rachel
The audition room was a small space with white walls, two chairs, and a high wooden stool. I followed Parker into the room and gripped the handle of my guitar case. Nerves had been beating on me all night, and the morning had brought no relief. I’d been awake at five and ended up going for a walk along the beach. The sand was cold against my toes, the vast expanse robbing me of breath. My soul soared as the fresh, salty air hit my skin, like a magical morning kiss. I stayed out there for a couple of hours watching surfers and early morning exercisers do their thing. I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face the whole time I sat there.
But reality caught up with me soon enough, and I had to brush the sand from my butt and head back to the hotel. I’d been too nervous to eat so I spent the whole time practicing and then making myself pretty. I shaved my legs and put on a little makeup. Millie showed me how to do my hair real nice and tame my reckless curls. I had the smoky eye thing happening and a bright lipstick that made my smile shine. I was wearing my sexy little skirt, and I chose my fitted white tank with the American flag on it. It was low-cut and made my boobs look bigger. I figured it couldn’t hurt, right?
“Take a seat.” Parker pointed at the stool. “Why don’t you get yourself tuned and ready to go while I find Aren.”
My curls bobbed as I nodded and headed over to the stool.
Laying down my guitar case, I took out my beloved instrument and sat down to recheck my tuning. I didn’t have to adjust anything and was soon tapping my fingers on the wood and waiting.
The door opened and I flinched, unable to stop my embarrassed, breathy laugh.
“Rachel.” A tall man with angular features and a long, pointy nose approached me. He was dressed in dark slacks and a white dress shirt that was unbuttoned at the top. He had on a fitted suit jacket that looked pretty stylish and matched his pointy shoes.
I took his outstretched hand and gave it a shake. “Hi.”
“I’m Aren Pierce.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” I rested my forearm against my guitar and smiled.
I wasn’t quite sure how I wanted to come across. Confident, most certainly, but was that all he wanted? Or was he after a more enthusiastic cheerleader-type girl? I didn’t know what to say as he stood there staring at me. His critical, dark gaze traveled the length of my body before coming to rest on my face.
His thin lips eventually drew into a smile. “Parker’s right. You are very beautiful.”
“Thank you.” I grinned, praying my cheeks weren’t going bright red.
“Well…” Aren hitched his pants and took a seat on the chair while Parker sat down beside him. “Please, play me a couple of songs, and I’ll see if you’re what we’re looking for.”
“Okay.” I nodded.
I decided to go with my Michelle Branch song first—“Set Me Free.” My boot tapped out a silent beat in the air and I started strumming. A smile hit my lips before the first word left my mouth. I loved the song because it made me think of Mama. I loved the sound of my voice as I sang it. Getting lost within the tune was easy, and I floated through the piece.
The one time I glanced up at the men, I nearly faltered so I decided to keep my gaze down. I knew that was bad performing. It was always better to make eye contact with your audience.
Come on, Rachel, don’t blow this!
As I reached the final chorus, I looked straight at Aren, giving him some sunshine. He grinned back at me, his head bobbing in time with the song. I strummed my last chord and sang the final line with a flourish.
A swift silence filled the room after I was done, and my already-tattered nerves went into a frenzy. Thankfully, they didn’t leave me hanging for long. Aren and Parker shared a grin, the agent looking pretty smug with his find.
“That was great.” Aren’s smirk landed on me and he ran a hand through his slicked-back hair. He and Parker were cut from the same cloth—city boys to the core. “Let’s hear another one.”
Parker winked at me. “That Jessica Simpson one you played the other night was really great.”
“Okay.” My giddy insides danced with a squeal as I placed my fingers on the strings and strummed out the first rift of “Come On Over.” I had to think of Josh as I sang the song; it was impossible not to. I was glad I did. My voice took on a husky quality when I sang it to him, and I could tell by the looks of approval from the two men that they might have found the girl they were looking for.
*****
“He liked you.” Parker grinned as he drove me back to the hotel.
“I sure hope so.”
“No, he definitely did. I could tell.”
I pressed my lips together, trying to contain the squeal wanting to break free. “So, um.” I cleared my throat. “What happens now?”
“Well, we’ll give him a little time to think, but I’ll call him as soon as I’ve dropped you off and find out exactly where he’s sitting. If he wants to take you on, we’ll draw up a contract over the weekend, and I’ll bring it by on Monday.”
“Okay.”
“Once you’ve looked it over and are happy, then I’ll move you into your new digs and you can get to work.”
“New digs?”
“Yes, Aren provides a little apartment for his singers. The rent comes out of your paycheck, but I can show you all this in the contract.”
“So, what’s the basic package then?” I held down my curls. They were dancing with the wind and tickling my face as we wove through the sunny streets.
“Well, like I said the night we met, you sign on with him and become a regular act at his club. Throughout that time, he’ll train you and help you find your best marketing image—I’ll be helping with that, too. Aren has really good connections and gets producers through his place all the time, so working with him, plus having the security of my services, will land you a deal for sure.”
“So, Aren doesn’t mind losing his entertainment to other producers?”
“Well, he’ll get a cut, you see, so it works in his favor to help his singers and performers get noticed. And in the meantime, he’s able to entertain his patrons while training you. His club is amazing and busy every night of the week. This is a great opportunity for you. It will definitely put your name on the map.”
“This all just seems so easy.” I laughed, still in shock at how it was all coming together.
“Sometimes these things just fall into place. I can’t help thinking that it was providence that I walked into Clark’s Bar on Wednesday. Who knows, maybe it was providence that had my rental car breaking down, too. Whatever it was, I’m really happy that I discovered you.”
I grinned. “I’m happy you discovered me, too.”
He chuckled, turning toward the beach and my hotel.
“So, can I check out Aren’s club this weekend?”
Parker nodded. “We have to play this caref
ully. If he thinks we’re stalking or hounding him, it might put him off.”
“But how do I know I want this job? I kind of feel like I should see what I’ll be doing before I sign something.”
Parker’s grin was wide and toothy. “Trust me, you want this job. You’d be a fool to turn it down, but if it makes you feel better, I could take you out tomorrow night. There’s a club near here that’s really similar to Club Liberation, so you’ll get an idea of what you’ll be doing.”
“Okay.” I nodded, feeling better for asking. I didn’t want my sheer excitement overriding my common sense.
“You don’t have anything to worry about, Rachel. Struggling singers would kill for a chance like this. I work with Aren a lot, and we’ve helped many kick off their careers. You give us twelve months, and we can turn you into the superstar you were born to be.”
“I like the sound of that.” A wide smile stretched across my face and stayed there…until I decided to call Josh.
Chapter Eleven
Josh
The bar was meant to open in less than ten minutes, and it was not the time for my phone to be ringing. I’d had one too many beers with Brock and my head was buzzing, which I did not need, especially when I had Denny yelling at me for not ordering in more frozen fries.
“We’ve got a whole crate of potatoes, make fresh ones!”
“Do you know how long that will take me! I can’t be slicing up french fries when I have a million other orders to fill!”
“I’ll order some as soon as I’m done with this call, damn it!”
“They won’t get here in time!”
“Then start choppin’!” I hollered over my shoulder before lifting the phone to my ear. “Hello!”
“Hey, honey.”
Rachel’s voice liquefied my insides.
“Hey.” A broad smile lit my lips, and I made a beeline for the stairs. “How’s it going?”
I clomped into our room and perched on the bed, my knee bobbing the second I sat down.
“Good. This place is amazing. I can see the ocean from my room!”
“The ocean? Wow, what’s that like?”
“So beautiful. Josh, I wish you could see it.”
I swallowed, thick emotion clogging my voice. I ran my hand over the unmade bed, missing her with an overwhelming ache. I wanted to ask her how the audition went but couldn’t form the words. What if it went great?
“The audition went real great today,” she chirped.
Closing my eyes, I held my heavy head and nodded.
“He really liked me, and I think he’s going to offer me a contract.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but couldn’t. A cool breeze from my open window whistled in and curled around my neck. I rubbed at my prickling skin with rough fingers.
“Josh?”
“Yeah,” I croaked.
“You not gonna say anything?”
I swallowed, gripping a handful of the crumpled cotton sheet. “What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know, that you’re happy for me!” Her sweet tenor disappeared.
My lips pursed to the side, my vocal cords protesting.
“Come on, honey, this is my chance. You can’t stay mad at me forever.”
“I’m not mad.” I cleared my throat. “I’m proud. I knew they’d love you.”
“Don’t ruin this for me, please.”
“I ain’t ruining anything. You’re over there, doing what you want.” I flicked my hand in the air before slapping it down on my knee.
“It’d just be real nice if I knew my man was behind me, supporting me.”
“I—I want to. I just…I miss you, baby.”
“I miss you, too.” She sighed.
“If you—” My jaw worked to the side, fear of her answer making me stumble over my question. “If you sign a contract, how long’s it for?”
She paused. Dread seeped through my system. It was an effort to inhale. I dug my elbows into my knees and braced myself.
“Twelve months to start, but more often than not he finds a big producer in that time, so I’d be signing a new contract with them. I really can’t say how long I’ll be gone.”
“Twelve months,” I whispered. That felt like a century. I remember crossing off my ol’ man’s tours of duty. Counting down the days was agony, yet I’d had to do it.
Twelve months.
I ground my teeth together, holding it all in.
“I might be able to come back and visit. I don’t know when, but I’m sure I’d get Thanksgiving off…or maybe Christmas.”
Thanksgiving! That was over five months away!
I clamped my teeth together and reminded myself to breathe.
“Well…” Rachel cleared her throat. “I guess I should let you go open up then.”
“Uh-huh.”
Her sigh was heavy, but short. “Thanks for the riveting conversation. Should I even bother calling you again? I mean, do you even want to know what I’m up to over here?”
“It’s just hard, baby. I didn’t want you to go, and I can’t pretend to be happy about it. I’m proud, but I ain’t happy.”
“That’s fine. Maybe I was asking too much. Have a good night.” Her voice was void of cheer when she hung up. I’d managed to slice her enthusiasm in half, and I felt bad for it, but at least I was honest.
Dropping the phone on my bed, I scrubbed my face and sucked in a slow breath.
“Josh! You up there?” Harriet’s voice pulled me back to earth.
“Yeah, I’m coming.”
“Well, hurry it up. I need my bartender. We’re short-staffed as it is!”
I closed my eyes, reality beating me like a bullwhip. We were short-staffed, and we were going to stay that way for a good long while if I didn’t do something about it.
Standing up, I snatched my phone and shoved it into my pocket. I didn’t want to think about hiring someone new. The weight of Rachel’s terse farewell sat heavy on my shoulders. She was gone…and maybe Brock was right. Maybe she was never coming back.
How the hell did she expect me to be happy about that?
Chapter Twelve
Rachel
The painful call with Josh really soured my mood. I spent the rest of my day in the hotel, ordering room service and watching movies. I couldn’t even play my guitar. I went to bed on a sugar high, feeling like a whale after all the food I’d stuffed into my face.
On Saturday morning, I woke up with a tummy ache and tried to get rid of it by going for a really long walk. I got lost quicker than I expected, but I did find a postcard, a real pretty one of the sun setting over the Pacific. I bought it and shoved it into my bag, hoping that I’d be able to write something pleasant.
Josh’s words still hurt.
I mean, I guess I understood how he was feeling and it was nice to be missed. I just really wanted him to be happy for me. This whole experience was a dream come true but he was tainting it, and I didn’t think that was fair.
Thanks to a lovely couple, I managed to find my way back to the hotel in one piece. I wasn’t sure what to do with myself, so I ended up playing my guitar and singing until my voice was hoarse. I wasn’t used to having so much time on my hands. It was a luxury that I quickly tired of. When Parker knocked on my hotel door that evening, I stumbled over myself trying to get to it.
“Hi.” I chuckled, flicking a wayward curl over my shoulder.
“Good evening.” He grinned, his brown gaze traveling down my body.
I’d decided to go a little fancy and was wearing the black dress Millie gave me for my birthday. It had thin shoulder straps and kind of flared out ‘round my knees. It made me pretty…at least that’s what Josh said, although he was hardly a reliable source. I could be wearing a trash sack, and he’d think I looked good.
“You are perfect.” Parker’s voice sounded a little in awe, which made me blush…again!
“Thank you,” I murmured, grabbing my purse and following him to the elevator.
We drove, with the top down, to Helium. It was a club on Sunset Boulevard that had a line of people going ‘round the corner. My lips parted as I approached the dazzling purple sign. Gorgeous girls and handsome guys were lined up waiting to go in. Parker led me straight past all of them and murmured something to the bouncer who took us straight through. It was like being a celebrity. A heady giddiness rumbled my insides as I played with the idea that one day I might actually be a celebrity! I was on my way!
We climbed the stairs and entered through the big black doors. Behind those was a set of thick purple curtains. A man in a tux pulled the curtain aside, and I gasped as we walked into a plush-looking club. Live music pumped from the stage as a singer with a crew of expert back-up dancers performed. The guy was amazing and so talented. His voice was like chocolate—smooth and creamy. My heart near-melted at the sound.
“This way.” Parker took my hand, laughing at my expression as he led us to a table in the corner.
“This is unreal.” I giggled, squeezing his arm. “So, you’re telling me this is like Aren’s club?”
“Yeah.” Parker nodded. “Really similar. There’s tables dotted throughout and a dance floor at the front, not quite as big as that one.”
He pointed down to the space and I nodded, smiling at the fans who were jumping around on the floor in front of the stage.
“But the stage is a similar set-up. Depending on what Aren thinks is best, and the performances that you guys put together, you’ll get a live band some nights and back-up dancers and singers.”
A thunderous applause filled the room as Mr. Amazing finished.
“Thank you, Helium!” he shouted into the mic, causing a second wave of cheers and applause.
He loped off the stage as the next act teetered on. She was in heels and a flowing gold dress that was stunning. Her tight black curls were teased high and her glossy red lips drew my eye when she smiled. She did a spin, her dress sparkling under the spotlights as she came to stand in front of the microphone. I was entranced. She had a smooth, husky voice that reminded me of KT Tunstall. When she started singing “Suddenly I See,” I hooted with laughter.
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