by Steve Vernon
Gin Bottle Heaven: I used to make my bread and milk money by collecting empty beer bottles outside of frat houses, back in my early college days. I’ll never forget the feeling of isolation I got watching folks cross to the other side of the road when I walked by with my gunny sack of bottles over my shoulder. The tale hasn’t been published elsewhere.
Do-Overs and Detours, Somewhere North of Bigfoot: This tale originally appeared in my ill-fated first collection, Nightmare Dreams, back in 2004. Possibly fifty people read it since then. All you new writers out there should be careful who you get in bed with. Just because a company calls itself a publisher doesn’t necessarily make it so.
Tinselled Trailer-Court Viscera: This was written originally with Borderlands in mind but it belongs here. A dark moody tale for anyone who has ever lived in a trailer park.
Voodoo Trucker Clucker Fuck-up: This tale originally appeared in one of the last book’s put out by Hellbound Books, back in 2006, right before they went belly-up. It’s a great little collection entitled Deathgrip 3: Exit Laughing and I debated a long time before choosing this title. Perhaps I should have debated longer.
Under the Skin, Under the Bones: I’ve always been a big fan of weird war stories and was glad to get the chance to write this one for Carnifex Press’s anthology From The Trenches (2007).
Pray for the Clockwork Twister: One of the few sci-fi stories I ever wrote. This is its first time in print.
Death Rides a Quartered Horse: This was written as a fun little entry for an online contest back a year or two ago. I can’t remember if I won, placed or never showed up.
Once More Round the Block: An old favorite of mine, sold to a Midnight Zoo calendar back in 1992. I offered to pose nude for the calendar but was told that such a sight was far too horrific for the horror genre we were marketing to.
Jugular: This one’s been around the block as well. The story first sold as a radio play (2000) and then rewritten into prose format for an appearance in James Beach’s fine magazine Dark Discoveries #5, (2005).
The Last Few Coils of Gut-Rope: I don’t know what I was smoking when I wrote this but I’m very certain I was terrorized in the womb by a flock of renegade chickens. The story first appeared in Creeping Hemlock’s very fine anthology, Corpse Blossoms, (2005).
Nail Gun Glissando: I wrote this just because I fell in love with the word “glissando”. It originally appeared in Dark Discoveries #7.
Harry’s Mermaid: This tale was originally slated for another magazine that went under, and has surfaced recently in the pages of On Spec Magazine.
I hope you enjoy the read.
About the Author
Steve Vernon is a storyteller. The man was born with a campfire burning at his feet. The word "boring" does not exist in this man's vocabulary - unless he's maybe talking about termites or ice augers.
That’s all that Steve Vernon will say about himself – on account of Steve Vernon abso-freaking HATES talking about himself in the third person.
But I’ll tell you what.
If you LIKED the book that you just read drop me a Tweet on Twitter – @StephenVernon - and yes, old farts like me ACTUALLY do know how to twitter – and let me know how you liked the book – and I’d be truly grateful.
If you feel strongly enough to write a review, that’s fine too. Reviews are ALWAYS appreciated – but I know that not all of you folks are into writing big long funky old reviews – so just shout the book out just any way that you can – because I can use ALL the help I can get.
Also By Steve Vernon
My Regional Books – from Nimbus Publishing
Haunted Harbours: Ghost Stories from Old Nova Scotia
Wicked Woods: Ghost Stories from Old New Brunswick
Halifax Haunts: Exploring the City’s Spookiest Spaces
Maritime Monsters: A Field Guide
The Lunenburg Werewolf and Other Stories of the Supernatural
Sinking Deeper OR My Questionable (Possibly Heroic) Decision to Invent a Sea Monster
Maritime Murder: Deadly Crimes From the Buried Past
My E-Books
In the Dark and the Deep – Steve Vernon’s Sea Tales #1
Harry’s Mermaid – Steve Vernon’s Sea Tales #2
I Know Why The Waters Of The Sea Taste of Salt – Steve Vernon’s Sea Tales #3
Flash Virus
Fighting Words
Tatterdemon
Devil Tree
Gypsy Blood
The Weird Ones
Two Fisted Nasty
Nothing to Lose –Adventures of Captain Nothing, Volume 1
Nothing Down – Adventures of Captain Nothing, Volume 2
Roadside Ghosts
Long Horn, Big Shaggy
Author: Steve Vernon
ISBN-13: 978-1-927765-26-5
First Printing – July 1, 2014
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An altered version of this collection was originally published by the good folks at Dark Regions Press. The main change I have made is to restore three of the stories that were originally a part of the collection and not a part of the Dark Region collection.