“What the hell are you doing in here?!” I shriek in absolute shock.
He nonchalantly leans up against the counter, his arms folded across his chest and one foot swung on top of the other, in a lazy stance. Meanwhile, water is dripping down my body as I cling to the curtain to shield me from the grin that forms on his face and has me about to jump out of my skin.
“Well, I figured if I wanted to talk to you, my best bet was to catch you in a compromised position like this . . . that way you can’t run.” His lips quirk up as if he is trying to hold back laughter.
“Like hell I can’t! I can leave if I want to!” I snap back, fully ready to storm out.
He smiles and pulls the bathroom door open slowly. “Really? Ok, leave then.”
A blast of cool air sweeps across me and has goose bumps spreading over my legs and arms. Then again maybe it isn’t the air at all.
His face breaks open into a full blown smirk as he waves his hand in front of him. I look down at my naked soaking wet body, covered by a thin sheet of vinyl and second guess my escape plan. Ok, so maybe I won’t bolt! I clutch the curtain for dear life and level him with a firm glare.
“How did you get in here anyway?” I demand.
Judd keeps the grin painted on his face as he swings the door shut and casually leans one hand on the sink behind him and shoves the other in his pocket.
“I used a key Bethany loaned me.”
Pulling his hand out of his pocket, he dangles it by his finger between us like a ball of yarn luring a cat into a trap, and of course, I take the bait. What, now he has a key to our apartment?!
I reach out and swipe my hand to grab it and nearly slip out from under the security of my shower curtain. Judd kicks his head back and snickers, clearly finding my reaction amusing.
“Why do you have a key and why are you in my bathroom? Do you mind?” I say sarcastically, trying to calm my nerves so he doesn’t see how uneasy I am in his presence.
He lays the key on the counter behind him and then looks straight at me.
“I left my hat here and when I came to get it, I decided to leave you the brownie.” He shrugs his shoulders after he reveals this tidbit of information.
I’m confused and curious and it must show on my face.
“I wanted you to know I still cared and that I still thought about you, even if it was too late,” he reluctantly says in a much lower tone.
I stand up taller and feel that familiar flutter in my heart that only Judd can invoke within me.
“Why?” I breathe out in a barely audible whisper, and then raise my voice an octave, “Why? When all you did was play me? What . . . was Bethany not enough? Did you want . . . ?”
I stop talking, remembering what Bethany had told me about the ex he was not over. Then I take in the scowl on Judd’s face. His body shifts and I can tell I hit a nerve.
“What the hell are you talking about? Played you? I never played you!” He steps forward only a foot away from me and clinches his fists to his side. “Lyssa, I told you I was in love with you. How do you figure I played you? It felt more like I was the one that was played! How do you think it felt to know I was just some summer rebound for you until you got back home to your boyfriend?”
My eyes widen and I let go of the curtain, pointing at his face.
“Wait just a minute! Rebound?! Kyle and I were over when I met you! Why would you think you were a rebound?!” My puzzlement starts to quickly flow into anger as this conversation moves forward.
Judd’s eyes widen and he pushes my finger out of his face.
“I don’t think that. I know I was!” His voice kicks up a notch and my adrenaline level rises as he goes on, “How long did you wait to go back to him? Was it the day you got back home or the next?”
I fold my arms across my bare chest, not even caring that I am standing in front of him stark ass naked.
“What!!” I spit out. “I never went back to him! Where did you get that idea! Just because he came to my apartment the night I saw you with Bethany! News flash, we ended almost three months ago when my life was falling apart and you were nowhere around! Did you expect me to sit around and wait for you to call this whole time?” My voice has elevated to a full out shrill.
Judd’s face distorts to astonishment and this time he points his finger at me. “Don’t give me that shit! When I called you, the guy that answered said he was your boyfriend. That was only four days after we left the lake. Four days!” he roars out with more venom than I have ever seen, yet my anger level muddles out as soon as he utters the words “when I called.”
He called?
“You called?”
Judd lowers his finger and his expression softens.
“Yeah, I called. Four days after we left and a guy answered the phone saying he was your boyfriend and asking me who I was.”
I look down at the bathroom floor and my mind races. Four days . . . four days! What was going on four days after . . . ? My mind comes to a dead stop and I stare directly at him.
“Four days after I got home, my dad told me his cancer was back,” I breathe out in an unfamiliar voice with a million different emotions crashing down on me and burying me alive.
Judd’s facial expression relaxes into a look of understanding and concern.
“I’m sorry, Lyssa. Bethany told me about your Dad. That’s why I left the brownie the next day. I remembered you telling me that your mom made them when you were upset. I just figured it might make you smile and maybe . . .” His voice trails off and despite the fact that he brings up Bethany’s name; my heartbeat speeds up at his compassion.
I can’t believe he remembers that little detail from when we went fishing together.
That day, I had finally let my guard down and told him everything about my father’s battle with cancer along with the tests that were weighing so heavily on my family’s shoulders.
That day, I had made my mind up to completely trust him, open my heart and let him in.
That day, I fell in love.
He clears his throat and his tone is laced with sorrow. “I am sorry to hear about that and I wish I had gotten the chance to be there for you, but why . . .”
I decide to interrupt him. Something still isn’t adding up. He called? He said he called that day.
“You said you called?”
He nods his head.
“But I never saw your number on my phone. And what guy?! There wasn’t anyone that could have . . .” I stop midsentence as an image of Kyle sitting on my bed, holding my phone emerges in my mind.
Oh no! Kyle had my phone and I swore I had heard it ring when I was downstairs.
“I called from Evan’s phone. Mine was crushed so I had to borrow his to call. I called as soon as I got out of surgery and was awake enough to think,” he says weakly, looking me in the eyes.
Surgery? I struggle to breathe as I tumble his words around in my head.
He dips his chin down and steps forward to close some of the space between us. I can’t look away from him. I don’t understand.
“Lyssa,” he pauses and a pained expression sweeps across his face. “Tristan and I had a wreck about an hour out from the lake. I was in the hospital for three weeks. I couldn’t call you right away, because I was in and out of surgery, plus I wasn’t even conscious. When I finally was able to, I called. I wanted you there so bad. You’re all I’ve thought about.”
My heart snaps in two and my eyes fill with water. The shower is still pounding against my side but the tears streaming down my face rival its current.
“I didn’t know. I wish I would have known. Oh God . . . you were hurt!?” I half ask, half tell myself, trying to overcome the utter shock that is engulfing me.
My bottom lip trembles as I bite down on it and look at him through foggy eyes, feeling completely ashamed of thinking he was playing me all while he was laid up in a hospital bed. My mind rewinds to the morning I first saw him again; to the deep scars and marks that lined his shoulder
and rib cage. In my selfishness, I hadn’t even questioned them or the tattoo.
My body shudders with remorse as Judd reaches a hand up to brush away a tear slipping down my cheek. As soon as his soft touch grazes my skin, every ill feeling, every bit of anger and sadness I felt over him dissolves.
His brows are pulled together and his eyes sparkle with tenderness and devotion; with the same look I had seen so many times before. Pressing my cheek into his hand, I close my eyes and revel in his soft, gentle touch that I have missed for so long.
Still needing to explain some things, I open my eyes and meet his stare.
“I didn’t know. And that day . . . it must have been Kyle. He came over to try and get me back, but I told him I had met someone and then my dad came home.” I halt my rambling to catch my breath and I can see understanding in his eyes. “Dad needed to speak with us and I couldn’t get rid of him. He waited for me and he must have answered my phone and felt threatened when he heard your voice. I promise you, I never . . .”
Judd’s fingertips softly trace the edge of my face down to my lips, letting me know that he needs no further explanations.
“I get it. I believe you.”
His lips curve up into a delicate smile and his warm hand runs back along my jaw into my wet hair as he steps forward to be closer. I grab the curtain, still not caring that I am bare but suddenly feeling light headed and dizzy from the rise of emotion within my heart. This whole situation got so heated and out of control over a misunderstanding and lack of information.
Judd’s Adam’s apple bobs as I hear him swallow. He straightens up his stance so that our bodies are only inches apart and separated only by the ledge of the tub. He drops his hand from my hair, both his arms dangling motionless at his sides. My body aches for his touch, but neither of us move.
“Do you still love me?” he asks quietly, yet I’m already prepared to shout out the answer for everyone to hear.
I don’t even hesitate, “Yes! I love you!” I’ve never felt more strongly about anything else in my life.
Now that all is revealed, all the tension and confusion between us melts and it is like no time has passed. I look at him, knowing he still owns my heart. Judd’s face lights up and he closes the remainder of distance between us.
OUR BODIES COLLIDE TOGETHER AND slam against the shower wall as water cascades over both of us. Water quickly seeps into every inch of Judd’s jeans and long sleeve shirt, but he doesn’t break away for even a moment. His hands dig into the flesh of my hips in a gentle, yet firm grip that has us both panting and our chests rising and falling rapidly against one another.
Whimpering at the sudden rush of electricity coursing through my body, I welcome his lips as they devour mine with so much fire and passion it could ignite a billion fireworks. A groan rumbles from his chest as his strong arms lock around my silhouette.
My hands are all over him all at once, reaching under the drenched fabric so I can touch his skin. I run my hands up his back into his hair, slowly wrapping my arms around his shoulders in an effort to get closer. Gripping my thighs in his hands, he swoops me off the ground and guides my legs around his hips.
After sliding one hand up the length of my leg, his hand squeezes at the skin of my ass as he presses me into the wall, locking us together.
His lips find their way from my mouth, to my jaw and down to the tender areas of my neck. I swallow gulps of air, trying to catch my breath, yet it is the sweetest feeling in the world. Tiny sucking noises have me shivering with desire as the wetness of his mouth glides across my neck back up to my mouth.
His other hand that is pressed to my back, supporting me, works its way up to my hairline. He pulls his face back just enough to look into my eyes.
“I love you, Alyssa. I couldn’t stop thinking about you these past months. I missed you so much,” he breathlessly says against my lips.
I can’t form a single syllable!
A whimper escapes my lips at his words and that’s about all the response I’m capable of giving at this point.
He pulls us away from the wall, still holding me in his arms and with his lips still attached to mine, he strains to reach down. The corner of my eyes catch him as he fumbles with the faucet to turn the water off and then steps over the ledge of the tub. Miraculously, nothing has slowed our hunger for each other. Once he has me pulled tighter into his arms with his hands braced at my ass, he stumbles through the bathroom and out the doorway. He never breaks our connection, keeping his lips firmly planted on mine while continuing on his path to my room. My arms hold so tight to him that I shudder from the pressure or maybe from wanting him so bad.
Once we fall onto my mattress, he quickly peels his wet shirt off and tosses it to the side. He kisses me down my neck and I see him struggling to fling off his shoe with the other foot. He looks at me frustrated; almost embarrassed.
“Hold on. Just one second,” he says with a self-conscious smile that highlights his dimple.
Standing quickly, he kicks his shoes off in one swift motion, then proceeds to battle with his soaking wet jeans, tugging and shifting his hips.
I’m so nervous, so excited and so happy that it’s making me giddy with anticipation. A loud giggle vibrates through my chest and out my mouth right as Judd peels them off completely.
Looking at me with a slight grin, he slides his body back over mine, sending tingles of excitement through me.
He places his face in my neck, tickling my skin with his breaths as he chuckles. I laugh at his reaction as he pulls his head up to look into my eyes. His face reflects all the love I feel in my heart. My eyes snap down to his lips as he smiles and laughs; I can’t stop staring. God, I missed his smile. I missed that adorable dimple.
“And here you thought I was a player. I can’t even manage to be smooth with you.”
A bubble of laughter bursts from my mouth and I squish my head back into the soft pillow as visions of our first time surface in my mind. He was so embarrassed that time and now he gets stuck in his wet jeans!
I softly kiss his lips and speak from my heart, “You’re smooth enough for me.” He is everything.
My hand runs along the slight stubble of his jaw, over his cheek and around the slight dip from his dimple as he smiles. I circle my fingertip causing it to deepen and then his lips are back on mine.
We don’t hold back and this time, there is no waiting for the perfect moment or ideal place. He is here and we love each other; it doesn’t get any more perfect than that.
Our bodies move in a perfect rhythm with one another. What started out as desperation and need turns into tenderness and passion.
He handles me so carefully, keeping his movement slow and steady. His mouth roams my skin licking and tasting like a man that has been starved for months. I run my hands over his skin, letting my fingertips memorize the curves of every muscle, the rigidness of each scar along his rib cage and then down to the v’s in his hips.
I continue my path up and down his body, listening to his breath pick up with every touch. His hands and lips work their own magic as sensations build and build inside me, making my thighs quiver and my stomach swirl and tighten.
Right as I am spinning out of control, he whispers into my ear through heavy breaths, “I love you.”
“Juuuuddd,” I call out in a breathy whimper as bolts of electricity shoot through my body, making my center pulsate and my breathing come in quick spurts.
His muscles tense and his movements slow as a deep moan escapes his lips. He collapses against my neck and tenderly kisses my skin between breaths. My fingers wisp through each lock of his thick brown hair as I try to calm the passion that is still ignited within me. I can’t get enough of him. I want more of him; I need more of him! My chest expands in a deep deliberate breath and then I slowly let it out.
Judd slides down to rest his chin on my chest as he stares at me with contentment in his eyes and a sweet smile. My heart swells and my eyes water with so much happiness that anot
her tear escapes.
“Hey, don’t cry. I’m here now,” he whispers so gently.
He knows I’m not sad; he knows exactly what I am feeling, because he is feeling it, too.
“I thought I had lost you forever.” My voice cracks as it dawns on me that all the pain and hurt from losing him is behind us.
He scoots his body up so that he is hovering above me and looking into my eyes.
“You never lost me. Didn’t I tell you that it wasn’t goodbye forever?”
I smile, remembering his words the morning that he left.
We hold each other for a long while, lost in the reality that we are together again. I still can’t believe it. Not even a minute is allowed to pass by before he is whispering “I love you” or “I missed you” and each time, my heart melts a little more.
Finally, I slip something on, gather his heavy wet clothes into my arms and run them to the dryer down the hall.
Once I’m out of Judd’s sight, my feet tread carpet like it is on fire so that I don’t miss more than a second with him. When I return, his bare body is still lying comfortably in my bed with a smile on his face and the sheet strategically placed, making me want to rip it off. My hand inches up to my opposite forearm and I pinch a small amount of skin between my fingertips just to make sure this is not a dream. Hooking his finger in front of him, he wiggles his eyebrows playfully, beckoning me back to bed.
My knees sink into the mattress as I crawl in beside him and then decide to bring up the tough subjects that will need to be talked about. As I lean my body across his chest, I carefully run my hand over the deep scar on his rib cage that I had seen the other morning along with the one on his shoulder.
“What happened?”
He shivers from my touch and his face changes to a serious expression.
“Tristan was in a foul mood and we ended up getting into a heated discussion. He got distracted for a minute and rounded a corner too fast. We flipped and I was thrown from the car.”
My body shudders when he says the word ‘flip’ and my adrenaline races when I imagine the pain he must have experienced. I wasn’t there with him; I should have been there with him.
Take My Breath Away Page 20