Anyway, Gabe still had time. I thought he would show up. I imagined him grabbing me from the steps of the plane and begging me to stay with him. I’d ask him why he fled. Why he didn’t call. He’d have a good reason.
I shuffled to the window of the airport and patrolled my eyes around the lot. My mind raced with anticipation. He would come. I forced myself to believe the lie. Then a cowboy hat appeared and disappeared behind the airport shuttle bus. My heart sprung to life and almost gagged me. I waited and watched. The hat rounded the vehicle slowly. The familiar body made long strides toward the door. I ran into the lobby and stopped cold, arrested by the sight of him.
I frowned. He wasn’t Gabe.
Caleb lifted his head in the doorway and removed his cowboy hat. “Hey legs, that’s no way to greet me,” he said as he extended an arm to cloak my shoulder.
“Where’s Gabe? Isn’t he coming?”
“He left for Texas. Don’t think he’s coming back.”
An avalanche of emotion smothered me. I wanted to fall down and pound the floor. I would never see Gabriel Halden again. It was real now. He was gone and I was leaving.
“He...he didn’t call.”
Caleb gently caressed the side of my face with his hand. I jerked my chin to shake off his fingers and he gripped me tighter. I knew what he was trying to do.
“Don’t touch me,” I told him and stepped back. It wasn’t going to happen and he knew it.
Averting my grim gaze, I listened as he said with a weary voice, “Go on, they’re waitin’ for ya. Forget about him, legs. I gotta split. Safe flight.”
His fingers raked over the skin on my hand and released. He exited through the same door he entered and replaced his hat on his head.
* * *
Returning home was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I immediately began my mental blackout, throwing away small pieces of my summer memories, one at a time. There was always something stopping me. Gabriel’s twentieth birthday landed on the last day of my first week of senior year. My birthday was weeks away. By the time I turned eighteen, I would be free of him. By the close of his birthday, I would have erased him clear out of my life. At least that’s what I told myself. I had a feeling I wouldn’t be able to get through the week if all I did was dream of him.
I could’ve skipped out on the first week of school, but the last time I tried that, I got myself thrown into a black hole and look where I ended up. I had practically trained myself to grieve inwardly without shedding visible tears or giving up my desperation. Managing to look sane while I was thirsting, hungering, and angering over Gabe was critical to keeping my misery low-key and my appearance normal. But before I fell asleep at night, the only time I stepped outside of my state of denial, I put on Gabe’s yellow T-shirt, inhaled his lingering scent, and let some of the summer seep back in just enough to keep me alive.
I continued to take one step forward and slide two steps back.
“It’s two sizes too big,” explained my mother when I pitched a royal fit after I caught her folding Gabe’s shirt into a pile of items to donate.
I snickered at the irony. Generally, she complained my shirts were too tight.
“Why do you want that ugly thing? You never even wash it,” she said as she turned her nose up at my most cherished possession in the entire world.
I was miserable at home. Other than my best friend, Janie, who couldn’t possibly understand what I was going through, nobody knew anything about my summer or my torment. My internal wounds failed to heal. They seemed to grow bigger. I wondered when I would be normal again, if I would ever be right. I longed for the day I could loathe Gabriel Halden. Maybe I would eventually forget his drawl, his humor. His eyes.
I was alone in a busy school among hundreds of students. I spoke few words and rarely made eye contact. I wandered through the crowded, rowdy hallways, shouldered and poked and bumped, but I didn’t react. I sat in solitude during lectures and classes and always chose the back row. I existed only in my sorrowful world, secretly asleep to everyone.
The last period bell rattled my bones. It sounded like an air raid drill. Still, I scarcely heard it. I was collecting my running sneakers from my locker when my practiced wall unexpectedly cracked. Someone in the hall uttered something bizarre that triggered me into a panic. It was so sudden and so unexpected. I thought I was dreaming. Or maybe hallucinating. I cursed myself for slipping. I had been doing so well.
I was standing at a mirror in the bathroom when I heard it again.
“Roller skates,” said the lively voice outside the doorway.
I rubbed at my ear. What I really thought she said was Texas plates.
Then she added excitedly to her friend, “Come on, you have to see him!” Their footsteps scurried away.
I held my stomach as it clenched. My mind was making things up. I splashed my face in the sink, smoothed my untidy hair, and popped a peppermint Altoid. The candy reminded me of Gabe’s sweet breath. I began to tremble.
He was everywhere.
He was nowhere.
My steps were painstakingly slow and cautious. I was concentrating on voices, whispers, sounds. My mother would be along to drive me to the YMCA. I’d started working two afternoons a week even though I lacked enthusiasm for money or boys or driving. By the time I reached the parking lot, all of the busses had left. I held my breath as I stepped out the front door and noticed the commotion. The varsity cheerleader squad was waiting for a game bus along with the basketball team. I was about to push through the noisy flock when a strong gale blew under the entryway. I watched the girls huddle in tight and crouch to cover their precious hairdos.
That’s when my gaze flickered across the lot.
That’s when my wretched, miserable life flipped a one-eighty in the blink of my disbelieving eyes.
I mouthed the words, Texas plates. The shiny black pickup truck was parked in the center of the student lot, with its red, white and blue plates, that I’d spent my summer breathlessly anticipating under my attic window. Sitting high atop the pickup cab was none other than Gabriel J. Halden with his long legs propped up on a toolbox. He held a book in one hand and ate from a bag of cinnamon hearts at his side.
I gazed at his head. The cowboy hat tipped down, and his face remained shadowed. He was wearing green Converse with thick white soles. My mouth went drier than the Sahara. I swallowed so hard my throat hurt. I took another step as a stirring of air burst through again and blew my hair straight up.
I didn’t care.
Gabe’s hand reached up to catch his hat, and he lifted his chiseled chin my way. His eyes found me. I felt myself calm down for the first time in ages. My entire body was smiling, yet my mouth drew into an impassive line as I tried to mute out the whispered nonsense behind me.
My lips parted to say something. A crafty smartass barked at my back, “Hey, Ross! Your limo just pulled up front. Your mommy’s here!”
Laughter followed.
I turned, offered a scathing eye, and shot my sneakers at the boy. “Go chase yourself!” I yelled.
The entire cheer squad gasped. I imagined they were wondering why I was approaching the mysterious stranger. I took one hesitant step after another. Was Gabe planning to climb down?
He spoke his first words. “C’mere, Av’ry. I got something to tell you. Can you move any slower?”
His drawl caused an ice cube to launch up my spine. I lurched forward, took a running stride, and scaled the tailgate. Then I came to a standstill.
My nerves were exposed like open wounds.
Gabe slid off the cab’s roof onto the bed and met me with a striking pose. He looked amazing, relaxed. Our eyes locked. His chest heaved. His breath was as caught up as mine. I offered a welcoming smile. He hurried to return one just as grand, but I dropped my gaze.
“How long have you been here? Why are you here?”
“That ain’t any way to say hello,” he scolded loudly and then said, “Five hours, give or take.”
; Had he really been in my school parking lot for five hours?
His chin tilted and he lifted his hat and coughed. He willed me to look at him.
I gasped and covered my mouth to stifle my nervous chuckle. He revealed the words I Love NY on his forehead in blue marker. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
I was too happy to be mad.
“You ever miss a good chance to be funny?” I slapped his shirt and left my hand where it landed. He was so warm. So real. His heart was pounding.
“Nope,” he said shrugging his shoulders. “I was just wondering if you got me a present.”
I huffed a noisy sigh and released his shirt. “You drove how many days and how many miles to ask me if I got you a gift? Are you out of your mind?”
“Three days. Seventeen hundred miles exactly. And yep, I think I’m outta my goddamned mind. I brought you your present,” he said suggestively and lifted his brow.
“You didn’t call me or anything,” I scolded. “You just stood there and let her...”
“I had some thinking to do.” He reached for my hand.
I had to fight myself not to shake him off.
“I’m sorry, Av’ry.” His cinnamon breath blew out.
I bit my bottom lip as he continued.
“Things have been happening. Just listen. I know I’ve been stubborn.” He said this and winked. It was the understatement of the millennium.
“The lieutenant took over LOC. Sucked them dry as soon as Hunt was put on trial. He’s been working on a takeover for a couple years now. Nobody had a clue. That’s why he was letting everything unfold with Eli’s accident. That’s how come he never stepped in. He wants me to train as an operations manager.”
My eyes climbed up the boy in front of me. Was he going to work the fields forever? What about school?
“So your father owns Texas and North Dakota now?”
“Purdy much,” he said and cracked a crooked smile. “That night you ran off, Lane told me some stuff about Eli and my family. I got all messed up. I was so angry and pissed off about everything. I couldn’t think straight. So I left before I hurt anybody. I thought about you. I just didn’t know how to tell you. You left me.”
“I didn’t leave you! You never came back. Aunt Meggie and your father made me come home. You were the one who didn’t show up.”
“Nobody told me. I thought you were done with me.”
“No,” I started to tell him as he cut me off and spoke brusquely as if he was relieved and nervous.
“Molly’s pregnant. Don’t know who the daddy is yet.”
I shook my head. Somehow I wasn’t surprised.
“I’m curious. What’s with the new sneakers? You usually wear cowboy boots.”
“Hey, you like them? I didn’t want to stick out like a sore thumb in New York.”
I held back my laugh. Gabe Halden would stick out anywhere.
“Oh yeah,” he added. “I got something to show you.”
With one hand he reached into his back pocket, fished out a piece of paper and unfolded it. The wind nearly swept it away.
“You got another speeding ticket?” I couldn’t help myself. I was so nervy in his presence.
Gabe raised an eyebrow. “Actually I got me three new ones on the way here to see you. They’re your fault.”
He twisted his lips into a wry smile. With two hands he held up the rippling paper. I leaned in for a look at the vibrating words. The formal letterhead had a familiar logo. I read it out loud.
“Syracuse University.” I lowered my gaze to the body of the letter. “An acceptance for college next semester. Here?”
“You know where I can find the place? You think you could show me around?”
My jaw scraped the bottom of the truck bed.
“How...how did you get in there? When did this happen? That’s where I want to go.”
He folded the paper carelessly and returned it to his back pocket, all the while beaming a magnificent grin.
“When your dad’s So and So Halden and calls up his ex-Air Force buddy in admissions and says he’ll pay up four years in advance, they kinda jump. Not to mention I graduated with honors last year. Technically, I got myself in. He just expedited the process.”
“Jeez, Gabe.”
I wondered if he had a sliver fork to go along with his silver spoon. Gabe was going to college in my hometown, in my state, with me. We were going to be together. I knew I wasn’t being presumptuous.
He answered my unspoken prayer.
“I’m getting a place. I wanna live here with you, Av’ry. How about it?”
His father must have had second thoughts about making him work the oil business. My heart galloped behind my ribs. I couldn’t think of a response. I would be eighteen in a handful of weeks. I could move out. My parents couldn’t stop me. My boyfriend was a billionaire, for crying out loud.
I cautiously smiled my answer, my excitement, my bliss.
“No more oil for a while?” I waited and watched for his reaction. He probably thought I was going to jump up and down or scream. “We’ll see how it goes.”
I needed to kiss him more than anything.
“I love you, Gabriel,” I added, when he tipped his head sideways in question.
Gabe tossed his hat in the bed. “Heck, I love you too, Av’ry Ross.”
His chin tilted as he reached around me, and then his mouth contacted mine. He kissed me greedily while my arms tingled with pins and needles and pure joy. I joined his kiss, his wonderful lips, with eagerness. We stepped up the action and ran our hands through each other’s hair. He tugged on my ponytail. I feathered my fingers over the sides of his face. He smelled and tasted like the Gabriel I knew in Williston. I wanted to take him somewhere alone and tell him just how much I loved him.
I was more madly in love with this boy than I knew possible. I finally accepted he loved me back.
“Avy! Avy! Hi, Avy! Hi!” The little voice squeaked out her song.
I thrust Gabe’s face off mine and passed him a rattled look. I could feel the horror of the moment as it sunk in. I didn’t want to look away in case he disappeared.
“My mother,” I mumbled.
I shot a glance over my shoulder. My mother was standing at the foot of the truck. Brianna was squirming like a kitten in her arms. The maddening expression on my mother’s face was priceless. She set Brianna down on the tailgate and watched her as she edged over to me and stood up in her fairy princess dress.
“Avery Norah Ross—I want to talk to you this instant,” my mother called.
I turned around and patted Brianna’s head. She was standing on her tippy toes and grabbed at my leg to get me to lift her.
“Pick me up.”
I obliged as I ignored my mother in every way possible.
“Hiya,” said Gabe to my little sister.
She buried her head in my chest.
“You must be the little lady your big sis has been talkin’ about.”
“This is Gabriel, Banana,” I introduced. “I love this boy. Someday I’m going to mar—”
Gabe’s eyes spread wide at my lost words.
The three-year-old had no clue what I was confessing.
“Nice to finally meet ya, Banana. I never met a banana before,” he told her. His southern drawl seemed to grab her attention. The way he talked to her melted my insides.
She pulled her head out of the hole and studied his marked up forehead.
“I’m not a nanana, I’m Bra-nana,” she corrected in the cutest voice.
“Avery Ross. Bring her down here.”
My mother was still there.
“Mama. Mama,” Brianna called.
I lowered her into my mother’s arms and turned to address Gabe before something bad happened to me.
“I’m sorry if this ends badly,” I said half joking. I really didn’t care one way or the other. He came for me. “I’m going with you.”
I grabbed his arms and planted a kiss on his open mouth that caused hi
s whole body to tremble with surprise.
“Avery, what do you think you’re doing?” my mother asked loudly.
I began to laugh, but it got stuck inside. I whispered to Gabe before I let go. “What does she think I’m doing—straightening your tie?”
Gabe laughed.
How in the world did my mother ever have children?
“This is Gabriel. My, uh, boyfriend.”
I hopped out of the truck bed and Gabe followed. He winked at Brianna, and she hid her head in my mother’s shirt.
“Howdy, ma’am. Good to meet you,” he said as he extended a hand and stood tall and straight.
He looked as if he had morphed into Lieutenant Colonel Joel J. Halden.
When my mother got wind of his accent and his eyes, her face flashed white as a ghost. Apparently, she hadn’t noticed the Texas license plates.
“He’s from Williston. He lives at Meggie’s. When you sent me out there, I met him. And we fell in love. Well, actually he’s really from Texas,” I said self-righteously.
I was going to rub it in as much as I could. From the look on her face, I guessed she was calculating something fierce.
My mother cleared her throat.
“Hello, Gabriel,” she forced out.
I think she started to put two and two together. The hazel eyes were unmistakably Halden, even if she hadn’t seen them in years. How could she ever have imagined Joel Halden’s youngest would sweep her daughter off her feet?
I wanted to scream it at her, that he was nothing at all like his rich, controlling, philandering father who she believed messed up Meggie’s life, but I gave her another moment to choke on her astonishment.
“I know who you are,” she told him with a phony smile. “What is it with you kids and markers?”
I interrupted her thought, working my angle into a deeper dig. “He’s Aunt Meggie’s fiancé’s son. She’s having his baby brother or sister. You know, Joshie’s half-brother.” I was quite pleased with myself for thinking fast. “Gabe’s a Halden. His father owns Halden-Remington and Longbranch Oil. He’s moving here and going to SU and I’m moving in with him.”
I succeeded in grabbing Gabe’s full attention as well as my mother’s. She could hardly hold my little sister anymore. Her nerves were frayed to itty-bitty threads.
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