by Leen Elle
Leen Elle
LIKE RAIN
This Novel is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and events are products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or to events or locations is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 2013 by Leen Elle
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
No part of this book may be used or reproduced, in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews
Chapter One
It was the fourth week of summer, hot and humid the way it always was in San Diego, California. But today there was a breeze in the air and the sky was gray with clouds. It was finally going to rain, about time too. We hadn't had any rain in almost a month, and the ground was starting to shrivel up.
This summer, unlike most summers which were over in an instant, was dragging by. My sister had already moved to New York where she was attending Columbia in the fall, Derek and I had broken up a couple weeks before school ended, and worst of all my best friend was gone.
It happened on the night of our very last day as sophomores. School was out and we were finally free after countless finals. I had just kicked my feet up and laid back on the couch, ready to enjoy a carefree summer at the beach or the mall with Maddy, when the phone rang. It was her mother telling me that she'd been in a car accident.
"What?" I'd said. "Is she okay?"
"No," she said through tears. "She's gone." Gone, I thought. How could she be gone? I had just seen her merely hours before at school. "See you tomorrow" was the last thing I'd said to her. I had no idea that was the last time I would ever see her alive.
I hung up the phone, threw on my shoes and walked out the door, heading up the street to Cael's house. He stood waiting in his open doorway like he knew I was coming. I stopped at the end of his driveway and just stared at him, trying to soak him all in; his sandy brown hair that hung over his face, his deep sky blue eyes, his tall, strong figure. There was no doubt that he was gorgeous.
He walked down his front steps and down the driveway towards me. He stopped directly in front of me, so close that I had to look straight up to see his face. "Maddy…..she-she," was all I managed to say before bursting into tears. I almost never cried, but when I did I really cried.
He immediately put his arms around me and drew me into a tight hug. "I know baby," he said. "I know." Baby, I thought. Weird, but he always called me that. We weren't going out or anything, never had. It was just what he always called me. And I didn't mind it. In a way it made me feel protected, but I always felt that way when I was with Cael.
Maddy had always been convinced that Cael and I would be the perfect couple. She tried desperately to push us together, but we always just remained friends, for one reason or another. I was never exactly sure why we were only friends except for the one explanation I always gave Maddy when she asked why I wouldn't date him. It would be weird.
Cael and I grew up together and had been best friends from kindergarten up until the 5th grade when Maddy moved in across the street and took his place. But that wasn't entirely true. She could never in a million years take Cael's place, but she was someone else to hang out with besides Cael so my spending time with him was split in half.
Maddy didn't buy my "it would be weird" explanation. The best couples start out as friends first, she'd always say. He doesn't like me that way, I'd tell her. But here I was lost in his arms, him there to save me at my first sign of weakness, and always my protector.
"Shhh," he cooed, while rubbing my back with one hand and his other hand running through my hair. "It's okay, it's okay." And the sky picked that moment to cry with me, and so it began to rain. "Come on, let's go inside," Cael said putting one arm tightly around my shoulder.
"No," I protested. "Let's stay out here."
"But it's raining," he said.
"I know. I love the rain." And so we sat outside on his front porch in silence, just feeling the cool raindrops on our skin, while the sky and I both shed our tears. It was funny how it always seemed to rain when you're sad, like the sky could somehow sense your sorrow.
Cael suddenly stood up and scooped me into his arms like I was a little kid. He walked out to the middle of the driveway and spun around, while kicking his feet through the puddles. Just moments ago I'd been crying and he already had me laughing.
"I see a smile," he said grinning at me. "It's good to see you smile." And then he just stared at me, for what seemed like forever, our eyes locked together. It was one of those silent, awkward moments when you know both of you want to lean in for a kiss, but you're each waiting for the other to make the first move.
Cael suddenly tore his eyes away from mine and looked up at the sky. "Drink the rain, Nevaeh," he said to me. I looked at him puzzled, but then opened my mouth and let the rain fall in. It was cool and moist on my tongue, and it was almost like being in heaven, laying there still in Cael's arms.
And now here I was sitting in the living room looking up at the cloudy, gray sky. Tiny water droplets began to fall, hitting the roof above me with a soft thud. I stood up and walked to the front door, stepping outside without bothering to put on shoes or a coat. I put my arms out, opened my mouth, and drank the rain.
Chapter Two
Maddy had been beautiful. She'd had long, straight golden brown hair, intense green eyes, and a curvy figure that I was always jealous of. She rolled her eyes whenever I complained about my stick thin body and said that I wished I had her curves. "You've got little curves," she'd tell me. "Cute ones." And maybe that was true, but I didn't want cute ones. I wanted her hips and her 36C bust size.
But Maddy had been somewhat jealous of my looks too. She'd wanted my soft blonde curls, sparkling blue eyes, and porcelain skin. So in a way, it was even. I had the face, she had the body.
I didn't know what to do that summer. I walked around the yard aimlessly, wandering back and forth between my house and Cael's. But Cael was working that summer so he wasn't always home. I didn't have my driver's license yet. I was still only fifteen. Maddy and I had been so excited when she got her license a couple weeks before school let out. We were going to have so much fun driving to the beach, or to the mall, or wherever it was that we wanted to go. It was the first summer we were finally going to have some freedom. But the freedom was gone before we even had a chance to enjoy it. Maddy lost her life, and I was stuck here alone.
The house was quiet. My dad worked during the summer and my mom passed away when I was five. I didn't really remember much about her, but I could still hear the sound of her laugh going off in my head. My dad had been dating various women in the ten years since she'd died, but he hadn't yet found someone he wanted to settle down with. The quiet of the house was finally getting to me, and so I got up, slipped on my flip-flops, and walked out the door.
I walked up the street to Cael's house, which was basically the only place for me to go. I wondered if he'd be working, but when I reached his house there he was, sitting on the front porch steps, soaking up the sun. He smiled when he saw me.
"Hey baby," he said as I sat down next to him. "What are you up to today?"
I shook my head. "Nothing. I don't know what to do."
"Well, I'll take you somewhere," he offered.
"Like where?"
"Like the beach."
"Okay," I said. And so I got back up and walked home. I threw on my bikini, shorts and a tank top over it, and grabbed my beach bag. It was already pre-loaded with a towel, sun screen, sun glasses, and money for the snack bar. I had been all ready to spend the summer at the beach with Maddy.
I heard the honking of Cael's convertible in my driveway, so I scribbled down a note for my dad and was ou
t the door. The sun was fierce and the sky was clear and blue. I hopped into the passenger side of the car and we were on our way. It was only about a 15 minute drive to the beach from where we lived in the center of San Diego. I rolled down my window and let the breeze hit my face.
I switched on the radio to find "I Will Survive," mine and Maddy's theme song, was playing. Cael looked at me with worried eyes, like I was a bomb that could explode at any second. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. The song had been our trade mark. We listened to it at every sleepover and requested it at every dance. I switched off the radio and leaned back in my seat, heaving a sigh and fighting to blink away my tears. It wasn't working. I turned to look out the window in attempt to hide the tears from Cael. He seemed to have sensed this.
"It's okay you know, "he said," to cry." I turned to face him, tears already streaking my face.
"I never cry," I said, my voice shaky.
"Yeah, I know that's right. The last time I saw you cry was in the 4th grade when I hit you in the nose with that football." I laughed between sobs. "But it doesn't make you weak."
"I know," I said, "but I don't like to cry. When my mom died that's all my dad ever did. I hated seeing him that way, so I've always tried not to."
"But it's good to cry," he told me. "It's how you grieve. If you don't everything just gets bottled up inside you."
"Do you ever cry?" I asked him.
"Yeah, even guys cry," he said laughing. I smiled.
"I miss her," I said sadly.
"I know you do baby," he said, gently squeezing my hand. "So do I." We pulled into the parking lot at the beach. I grabbed my beach bag, and we got out of the car. We found an available spot and laid our towels down. I took off my tank top and shorts and caught Cael looking at me the way Maddy always said he did but I had never noticed until now. Lust, she called it. He tore his eyes from me when he noticed I was looking at him.
"Come on," he said, standing up and walking towards the water. I followed after him, and he broke out into a run. I chased him into the water where he stopped, picked me up by my waist, and ran further out into the ocean. Once we were at a deeper location he dropped me into the water. I felt the cool water rush over my body and my face. I stayed under for a while, then came up for air.
Cael stood grinning at me when I came up to the surface. I threw my head back, laughing. We stayed in the water a while longer, walking out deeper. Once the water was up to my chest the waves were crashing up over my head. Cael picked me up and held me above the waves. He was a lot taller than me. I was just barely 5'4, while he was teetering over 6'3. I held my arms tight around his neck as he held me out of harms way, keeping me safe just as he always did.
Chapter Three
Derek and I went out for about three months. He was a jock, I was a cheerleader. It was just typical. I really only went out with him because I felt I had to, like it was expected of me. I'd never really had much interest in him before Marissa, a fellow cheerleader, decided we would just be the most adorable couple. So at all the parties and after the games she'd shove us together, forcing us to engage in awkward conversation. After a couple weeks of this he asked me out, and I said yes because it was "the thing" to do.
There was nothing particularly wrong with Derek, but then again, there was nothing special about him either. He'd hold my hand, kiss me on the cheek before parting to our separate classes, and let me wear his letterman jacket…all that traditional stuff. But there was nothing exciting about him, nothing that made me actually want to get up and go to school in the morning. In all honesty, he was just plain boring, and so after waiting it out a few months seeing if it got any better, I broke up with him because it never did.
Maddy never said much about it when we started dating. She'd just nod her head whenever I talked about him and act like she couldn't care less. But I knew that she secretly thought Derek and I were totally wrong for each other, and she turned out to be right. She'd mumble under her breath, "you should be going out with Cael," but I never acknowledged the fact that I'd heard her. I'd just pretend I wasn't listening.
Derek didn't seem much effected when I broke up with him one day after school. If he was upset or disappointed he didn't let it show. I was relieved by this. I wanted the break up to be as easy as possible because I definitely didn't deal well with confrontation. I'd put off breaking up with him for days, even debating whether or not I should, because it just wasn't an easy thing for me to do. I wanted to be sincere, without being blunt, which I thought nearly impossible. But he just said okay, smiled weakly, and walked away. He made it easy.
Maddy seemed near ecstatic when I dumped him. She tried to hide it, but I could see right through her. Now's the perfect chance for you to snag Cael, she'd told me the day I broke up with Derek. I just rolled my eyes and shook my head, wondering if Maddy would ever stop trying to get me and Cael together. Whenever she'd mention it to him that we should go out he'd just smile and continue with whatever he was talking about before Maddy interrupted.
I lay on my stomach on the front porch absorbing the sunlight, and I though about what Derek and I would be doing at that very moment if we were still going out. Probably at some football player's house, swimming in the pool and drinking beer. The only time I ever drank was when we were at those parties together. It wasn't that I felt a lot of pressure to, it was that I thought it would make the situation easier, seeing as I didn't want to be there in the first place. Drinking just made me relax and feel more comfortable. But I hadn't drunk a single drop of alcohol since Derek and I broke up.
"Another reason you should go out with Cael," Maddy would say. "He doesn't drink or go to lame parties." I always wondered why Maddy didn't just go out with him herself if he was so perfect.
I sat up on the porch and looked across the street at Maddy's house. I thought about all the late nights we spent there talking and watching scary movies, the countless makeovers we performed on each other, and all the dances we prepared for at that house, continually checking and rechecking our hair. There was now a 'for sale' sign in front of the house and I didn't know if I would ever even set foot inside it again.
The phone started to ring and I ran inside the house to answer it. "Hello?"
"Hey Nev."
"Hi Dad," I said.
"Listen honey, I'm going to be late coming home today," he said.
"Again?"
"I know, I'm sorry. I've just got a lot of extra work to do for this new advertisement I'm working on. You can make something for yourself for dinner, right?"
"Sure," I said.
"Great," he said. "Thanks. I'll see you later tonight."
"Bye Dad," I replied, hanging up the phone and returning to the front porch. All my dad ever did was work, ever since I could remember. After my mom died it was my sister who raised me, not my father. He never had time for me or anything else, except his work and an occasional date. So now I was alone in the house because Jane, my sister, moved to New York the day after graduation.
I was pondering over what I should have to eat when I saw Cael coming up the street to my house. "Hey babe," he said when he reached my front porch. I stood up and he hugged me, which was unusual, even for Cael.
"Hey," I said.
"What are you up to tonight?" he asked me.
"Nothing. My dad just called and said he was going to be late tonight, so I'm on my own."
"No you're not," he said, "you'll be with me."
"I will?" I said with a smile.
"Yeah you will," he grinned at me. "Come on." He grabbed my hand and we walked back down the street to his house.
"So where are we going?" I asked.
"You'll see," he said. When we arrived at his house he led me up the porch steps, through the front door, and into the kitchen where he already had a full course meal set on the table. There was salad for starters, followed by corn, potatoes, and chicken for the main entrée, and a vanilla cake with chocolate frosting for dessert. It was all my favorite f
oods.
My mouth dropped slightly and then a smile spread across my face. "What's all this?" I asked.
"This," he said, pulling a chair out for me, "is your dinner, made by the most famous chef in this house, me." He smiled.
I laughed and sat down. "Well what's the occasion?"
"You think it has to be a special occasion for me to do something nice for my best friend? I'm hurt," he said jokingly while putting his hand to his heart.
"Okay, okay," I said laughing. "I'm sorry. I just didn't realize I was special enough for this royal treatment."
He grinned. "Course you are."
Chapter Four
I walked into my dad's room the next evening. He appeared to be in frenzy, rushing back and forth from one end of the room to the other, to the closet, to the bathroom.
"What are you doing Dad?" I asked him, while he was digging through his drawer of ties.
"I'm getting ready for a date," he replied, picking out a striped blue and red tie.
"A date?" I was used to my dad going on dates, but he'd been so busy he hadn't gone on one in months. "Aren't you too busy with your new advertisement?"
"Finished it early this afternoon," he replied, while assembling his tie.
"So who's the girl?" I asked.
"Just a woman I met at lunch today. Look Nev, I don't really have time for this right now. I have to finish getting ready. We'll talk about it later," he said with a tone of irritation in his voice. He directed me out of the room and shut his door. There was never time for me. I was always second or third priority, never first.
I went to my bedroom and looked out the window and across the street at Maddy's house. I looked at the sign in her front yard. Sold. I could see her mother, Scarlet, standing in front of the kitchen window. She was looking at me. She raised her hand and motioned for me to come over. I turned and walked out of the room and slowly down the stairs. I stepped out the front door barefoot and walked the 48 steps it took to get to Maddy's house. I recognized every crack on the sidewalk, every flower, every blade of grass that I passed on the way. I could make the walk backwards, deaf, and blind.