by Leen Elle
"What does that mean?" he asked.
"It means no," I said after only a moment's hesitation. I wasn't sure if that was absolutely true, but it seemed the appropriate thing to say.
"Okay then," he said. "What about us? Where do we stand?"
"Uh…I just met you. I don't know anything about you," I said.
"Well, what do you want to know?" he asked.
"For starters, how old are you?"
"I'm nineteen. You?"
"I turned sixteen yesterday," I said.
"Oh, really? Happy belated birthday then," he said flashing me his white teeth.
"Yeah, thanks."
"Any other questions?" he said.
"Yeah, why are you even here? What do you want from me?" I asked
"What do I want from you?" he repeated, almost laughing.
"Yeah, I mean you delivered me a pizza, that's all. Why such an interest in me?"
He seemed at a loss of what to say. "Well, for one thing, you're gorgeous."
"Oh, so you must do this a lot then if you go after every pretty girl you see," I said.
He shook his head and smiled. "I just think I have a connection with you. You seem like the kind of girl I can have fun with."
"What kind of fun?" I asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
He laughed. "Clean fun…or dirty, whichever you prefer." I smiled. "So, can I come by again?"
"You know where I live," I said. He stood up, and I walked over to the door.
"Can I get a kiss?" he asked. I turned my head to the side and leaned a little towards him to indicate that he could kiss only my cheek. He kissed me and gave me one last toothy smile before stepping out the door and shutting it behind him.
As soon as I heard his car pull out of the driveway and down the rode, I slipped on my shoes and went out the door. When I got to Cael's house no one was home. I figured he was at work. I had no idea when he'd be home, but I sat on his front steps and waited. I ended up falling asleep sprawled out on the porch and baking in the sun. I awoke with a jump when Cael tapped me on the shoulder.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, looking confused. I sat up and looked around, waiting for my memory to come back to me.
"I…I was waiting for you," I said.
"For how long?" he asked.
"Uh, I don't know. Since late morning I guess."
"Nevaeh, it's almost 3 o'clock!" he said looking worried. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up. "Come on, let's go inside." I followed him in and sat beside him on the couch. "So what are you doing here?" he asked again.
"I…I wanted to talk to you," I paused, "about last night." He nodded and looked down at the floor. "Cael, look at me," I said. He looked up. "Why were you even out there? Why did you come back?"
He stared at me, straight in the eye. He waited a moment before he spoke and looked back at the floor when he did. "No reason," was all he said.
"Well are you upset or something?" I asked.
"No, no. Why should I be upset? You're allowed to have boyfriends. You're allowed to kiss guys. I'd just prefer if I didn't have to see it." He smiled.
I laughed. "So we're good then? No problems?"
"No problems," he said. "One question though. Why in the world did you sit out there waiting for so long? You're burnt to a crisp!"
I looked down at my arms and legs and saw that my skin was pink. I laughed. "That's how important you are," I said, pointing to my burned skin. He smiled. "But I should probably go now."
"Alright," he said. "I'll see you later then." I waved good bye and walked back to my house. I saw Halley and her mother getting out of their car with loads of shopping bags.
"Oh, hello Nevaeh!" Margaret called, waving her arms violently.
"Hi Mrs. May. Hi Halley," I called back. Halley waved and smiled at me.
"Would you like to come over later?" Margaret asked. "You can stay the night if you like." I pondered the idea. I couldn't imagine sleeping over at Maddy's house again with someone other than Maddy. But I was sure Halley could use the company, especially after spending all that time locked up with her crazy mother.
"Sure," I yelled. Halley looked positively thrilled.
"Oh great!" Margaret called. "Come over whenever you like."
"Alright, thanks," I said. "I'll see you later." I waved one last time before walking up the front steps to my house. When I got inside I saw to my horror that Jasmine was sitting at the kitchen table stirring a cup of coffee. She looked up when she heard me.
"Oh Nevaeh, I was wondering where you were. Come over here and sit by me," she said pulling out the chair beside her and tapping it with her hand. I sighed and dragged my feet over to the kitchen.
"Where's my dad?" I asked after sitting down at the kitchen table.
"Oh, he's upstairs. He'll be down in a minute," she said. "I took him down to my office and showed him where I work. He got to see everything involved in the making of Vogue. He just loved it." I rolled my eyes.
"I bet," I said sarcastically. She didn't notice.
"So what have you been doing today?" she asked, staring intently at me. I hated her fake interest in me. I could so easily tell that she didn't really give a damn.
"Nothing really," I said. "I was just at my friend's house."
"Oh, you're boyfriend?" she asked.
"Um, no."
"Oh, I was going to ask you," she said, "which one of those boys is your boyfriend."
"Uh…what boys?" I asked.
"You know, there was that one who was over here yesterday. What was his name?"
"Cael," I said impatiently.
"Yes Cael, that's it. And then I saw you outside last night with that other boy…dark hair, kind of mysterious," she said, trying to describe him.
"Nathan," I said.
"So which one is your boyfriend?" she asked.
"Neither," I said. I heard my father coming down the stairs.
"Hey Nevaeh, where ya been?" he asked, leaning over to kiss Jasmine. I gave them a look of disgust, but he didn't see.
"Cael's," I said. "Dad, don't you ever go to work anymore?"
He laughed. "Sure I do, but I'm not needed as much right now."
"Yeah, now that you got Miss Vogue to tie you down," I said under my breath.
"What was that?" he asked me.
"Nothing," I said. I got up and walked towards the stairs.
"Come back here Nevaeh, I'm not done with you," he said.
"Well, I'm done with you," I called, marching up the stairs and stomping into my room. I started to pack my bag to go to Halley's. I was already sick of being in this house, and I'd only been there for 10 minutes. I hated Jasmine, I hated my father. I was just biding time until she was gone for good and my dad went back to burying himself in his work. I didn't really like that either, but it was all I knew. I figured that was the way it should be.
Chapter Eleven
"Hello? Earth to Nev," I heard Halley say.
"Oh, sorry," I said, bringing my attention back to the present. I was sitting in Maddy's old room, and I hardly recognized it. It looked completely different now that it was inhabited by someone else. "Could I used your bathroom?" I asked.
"Sure, it's-," Halley started.
"I know where it is," I said before she could finish.
She squinted her eyes at me. "How do you know where it is?" She looked confused.
"My best friend used to live here," I said. "I've been here a million times."
"Oh my God, I didn't know that. So did she move?" Halley asked.
I looked down at the floor and heaved a sigh. "She passed away," I said, "a little over a month ago."
Halley's eyes widened and she put her hand over her mouth. "Oh my God Nevaeh, I'm so sorry. I had no idea."
I shook my head, still looking at the floor. "It's okay," I said, holding back tears the way I always did. "I'll be right back." I headed down the familiar hallway to the bathroom. It was basically the same. The walls were the same, the floor, the sink, the tu
b, the toilet were all just how I remembered them. I stood in front of the mirror where Maddy and I often did to do our hair or our make up.
I walked out of the bathroom and down the hall to what had been Maddy's brother Scott's room. He had been my very first crush until I finally realized that 16 year olds don't date 9 year olds. Maddy and I had both cried our eyes out when he left for college. I could still remember peaking in at him in his room and watching him while he played his guitar. Of course, he'd always catch me and tell me to come it. He'd pull me up next to him on his bed and play me a song. I never saw him again after he went off to college. He never came back to visit.
I looked at the wall opposite Scott's room where you could still see the pencil marks marking Maddy's, Scott's, and even my height. Mine and Maddy's final mark had been made a couple months before she died. I had been about 2 inches taller than her. It took me a moment to notice that Margaret was standing behind me.
"Oh, I've been meaning to paint over that," she said. "Must have been left behind by whoever lived here before."
I nodded. Suddenly the memories were flooding me and I couldn't take another moment in that house. I ran back into Halley's room
"Halley I need to go," I said.
"Why? What's wrong?" she asked me. "Oh God, what did my mother say to you?"
"No, it's nothing," I said quickly. "I just really have to go. I'm sorry."
She nodded. "Okay." I grabbed my stuff by the side of her bed, ran downstairs and out the door.
The air was cool and felt good on my face. It wasn't very late yet, just beginning to get dark. I could see my dad's car parked in the garage, which meant he and Jasmine hadn't left for their date yet. I didn't feel like going home so instead I walked down the street to Cael's house. When I rang the doorbell it was his father who answered.
"Nev!" he said with a huge smile plastered across his face. "I haven't seen you in ages! How've you been?"
"Pretty good, I guess. And yourself?"
"Oh, I've been alright, just exhausted," he said with a sigh. "I've been swamped with work for the past few weeks." Both Cael's parents had just recently opened a new 50's restaurant on the other side of town. They seemed to be having a little bit of trouble getting things running smoothly.
"So, what's with the stuff?" he asked. "Camping out?" I looked down at the back pack, pillow, and sleeping bag in my hands.
"Oh, I just came back from a friend's house," I explained.
He nodded. "Well, come on in," he said. "I'll get Cael for you." I went in the door and closed it behind me. "Cael, could you come down here?" his father called. "Nevaeh's here."
Cael came bounding down the stairs. When he saw me he looked surprised, not to mention uncomfortable. And then behind him, a girl came trotting to his side. I felt myself do a double take.
"Oh, hi Nev," Cael said quietly, looking slightly embarrassed. Not baby or babe, just Nev.
"Um, hi," I said. I suddenly felt stupid standing there with my pillow and sleeping bag.
"Hi," the girl said smiling brightly. "I'm Kyla. Cael's obviously not very good with introductions." She nudged him in the ribs. He blushed. She was pretty. Not gorgeous, but still pretty. She had dark brown hair that was a mass of curls, brown eyes, and somewhat dark skin. She was thin and real short, much too short for Cael.
"So you're Nevaeh," she said. "Cael told me about you."
"He did?" I asked surprised.
"Yeah, he told me you guys were really good friends," she said.
I nodded. "Well, he didn't tell me anything about you," I said eyeing him.
"Well I guess I'll just have to tell you about myself then," she said. She came the rest of the way down the stairs and sat down on the couch, motioning for me to come sit next to her. Cael sat down in the chair opposite the couch in silence.
"When did you meet Cael?" I asked her. I could tell that Cael was avoiding my eyes.
"Oh, just a few weeks ago. We work together," she said.
"Oh, okay," I said. "So what are you guys up to this evening?"
"Oh nothing really," she said. "We're just hanging out. We were thinking about going to see a movie. Do you want to come?" Cael still wouldn't look at me.
"Oh thanks," I said, "but I'll just let you two go on your own."
"It's no trouble if you want to come. We don't mind," she said. I smiled a slightly fake smile.
"Thanks for the invite," I said, "but I've got to get home anyway."
"Okay, if you're sure."
"I'm sure. I'll see you guys later. Have fun." I got up and started to walk towards the door.
"Bye Nevaeh," Kyla called. I smiled and stepped out the door, not even waiting for a word from Cael.
It was hard to believe Cael had a girlfriend. It wasn't like it was surprising, considering how gorgeous he was. I just wasn't used to him having another girl in his life. Sure he'd had girlfriends before, but he wasn't one of those guys with a new girl every week. It never seemed a big deal when he had girlfriends before, but he never brought them around. It was easier when I didn't have to see them, so this time it was already hard. The worst part of it, though, was that I liked her.
Chapter Twelve
My father's car wasn't at our house, but someone else's was. It was Nathan's, and I could see him waiting for me on the front steps. He smiled when he saw me.
"Hey," he said.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
"I was waiting for you. What do you think?" he said.
"Well, how'd you know I'd even be home soon?" I asked him
"I didn't," he replied. "So what's with the stuff?"
"Oh, I just came from a friend's house."
"That guy?"
"No. Well, yes. I was going to spend the night at my friend's house who lives across the street," I said, pointing at Halley's. "But then I changed my mind and just went over to Cael's for a little while."
"Why'd you change your mind?" he asked.
"Too many memories," I explained. "Remember, I told you my other friend used to live there..."
"But she died," he finished. I nodded.
"Well, you can come in if you want," I said.
"Okay, let me help you." He took both my pillow and sleeping bag and followed me inside the house. "So, where's your room?" he asked once we got inside.
I looked at him suspiciously. "It's upstairs," I said.
"Will you show me?" I stared at him for a moment. "I gotta take this stuff up there anyway."
"Okay." He followed me up the stairs and through the door to my room. "Here it is."
"Nice," he said, setting down my pillow and sleeping bag.
"Okay that was fun. Let's go back downstairs," I said walking towards the door. Nathan grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
"Wait," he said. "What's your hurry?"
"My room's not that exciting, you know."
"I can make it exciting." He pulled me towards him and planted his lips on mine. He kissed me long and hard, and I felt his hands running up my shirt. I pulled away. "What?" he said.
"Nathan, I just met you," I said.
"So?"
I sighed. "This isn't going to work. I can already tell that you're fast, and you obviously don't like to hear the word no. You should just leave," I said.
"Hey, hey," he said. "I can slow it down. I can handle no."
"No, I don't think you can," I said, starting to direct him out the door. He grabbed my hands and stopped me. He put his arms around my waist and held me against his chest.
"Do you like this?" he asked. I thought it an odd question.
"Yes," I answered honestly.
"Then this is all we have to do," he said. I looked at him and he met my eyes, the way Cael never would.
"Okay," I said. I didn't know why I was giving in to him, but I figured I didn't have anything to lose. I heard someone knocking on the door downstairs. "I'll be right back," I told Nathan and went downstairs to answer the door. My eyes widened slightly when I saw that it was
Cael.
"Hi," he said, looking at the floor.
"Hi. What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to explain," he said.
"Cael, there's nothing to explain. Like you said, we're just friends. It just surprised me, that's all."
"Kind of like seeing you kiss that guy surprised me," he said.
"Right. So I should warn you, he's here."
He looked up. "He is?"
"Yeah," I said. "He's upstairs."
"Oh, I guess I should go then."
"I thought you were going to a movie with Kyla," I said.
"I am," he replied. "She's still at my house. I just told her I wanted to come talk to you for a minute."
"Well, she must be pretty cool if she'll allow that," I said with a smile.
"Yeah, she is." He waved goodbye and I closed the door. I wondered what Maddy was thinking, seeing all this happening. She would say it wasn't right and Cael and I were just dating other people to hide our true feelings for each other. And maybe she was right, but it didn't look like Cael and I were going to be together anytime soon, if ever. He had someone waiting for him at his house, and I had someone waiting for me upstairs. Whether or not that was supposed to be what was happening, I didn't know. I only knew that was the way it was, and all I could do was go with it.
Chapter Thirteen
I heard a soft tapping on my bedroom door late that night. I sat up and looked at the clock. It was 2am.
"Nevaeh? Can I come in?" It was my father.
"Yes," I said. He opened the door and came in my room I couldn't make out his shape in the dark, but I felt him sit down on the bed next to me. My eyes began to adjust to the light, and I could clearly see his face. His eyes looked serious.
"I want to talk to you," he said quietly.
"Okay. About what?" I asked.
"About Jasmine," he said. I sighed and leaned back against the bed post. I waited for him to continue. "We're getting pretty close."
"Unfortunately," I mumbled under my breath. He ignored it.
"I think you should spend some time with her," he said.
"What?! I don't-," I began to say.
"Now Nevaeh," he said cutting me off, "I think you need to get to know her.