by Xavier Neal
Because this game isn’t difficult enough normally, right?
Jovi is the first to fall. She leans over to put her hand behind her yet slides on a wet spot, completely wiping her out. As soon as she’s down she turns into a giggling mess, which prompts Merrick to laugh during his attempt to follow the instructions, slipping as well. He lands on the space beside her and playfully splashes some of the lingering paint at her.
Once they clear the mat, Soph spins again and prepares to announce the color when she’s interrupted.
“This looks awfully interesting,” my husband’s voice states with amusement. He tilts his head at the sight. “Father…are you actually playing?”
Kenneth tries to peer at him from the awkward angle he’s struggling to maintain. “A Kenningston has to win this game. I remember how poorly you two lost last time. It was embarrassing.”
“They cheated!” His sons croak in unison.
“I’m a Kenningston now,” I say from my location underneath Guy.
Stop glaring at me like I did it on purpose! It’s the game!
“So when I win, technically your dream will still come true.”
Soph snickers behind the game piece she’s holding.
Kellan’s eyes swing to me and his jaw immediately locks as he drinks in the provocative position I happen to be in. My body is sprawled out like a crab and Guy’s is towering over mine creating an unusual sexual implication.
“You’re awfully cocky,” Guy states, peering down at me.
“She always is when it comes to playing games,” Kellan says in an unsteady voice.
I drop my head backward to glare. “You’re just mad because I play them better.”
“Let me disprove that right now.”
“Can’t. Game’s already started.”
“You can take my place,” Guy volunteers. “You don’t have time to change but-”
“Done,” Kellan cuts him off, shedding his shoes and socks in the process.
Before I have time to object, the two have swapped places and a goggled covered face I would rather punch than kiss appears in my presence.
With a smug smirk, he whispers, “This is much better.”
I roll my eyes with a grunt. “For you maybe.”
His jaw drops but I choose to ignore it.
Harsh? Oh that’s harsh, but not coming home to your wife so you can play naughty boss and secretary with your ex is totally acceptable? Whatever. I know that’s not what they were actually doing, but it hurts quite similarly. Like waking up alone. Like feeling abandoned by your spouse for the hundredth time.
“Ready whenever you are Sophia,” Kenneth announces loudly.
There’s a long, deep breath out of her followed promptly by the next instruction. When we move, Kellan does everything in his power to stay hovering in my space. Rather than give him the satisfaction of voicing my annoyance, I simply let my mind wander to the amusement I will be getting the first time he gets a burst of paint on his pants. Or his tie. Or even right in the eyes. She calls out another set of directions but lets out a deep uncomfortable breath in the middle of them, which sends Kristopher rushing off the mat.
“Are you alright?” He asks from directly in front of her.
Soph’s silence grabs the rest of our attention.
Her eyes fall shut and she releases a worrisome wail.
“Soph,” Kris’ voice drops to a softer, more concerned level. “Soph, please tell me you’re alright. Is it the baby? Is it kicking? Do you need to pee?” His eyes dip down the front of her before he whispers louder than he realizes, “Did you…already pee?”
There’s a short delay, but she loudly states, “My water broke, you idiot!”
“Broke?!” We collectively shout.
She groans, “Yes.”
“Like isn’t just damaged or leaking?” Her husband question quickly. “But broke as in...as in…in…”
“As in it’s time to have a bloody baby!” Soph huffs. She gives all of our shocked faces the best smile she can muster up. “Unfortunately this means the game has come to an end and it’s a draw.”
Even about to pop out a kid, she’s still adorable?! Definitely jealous. Not of the fact she’s about to push out a kid, but the other part. Holy shit! She’s about to have a baby! Holy shit! I’m about to be an aunt! The future king or queen of this country is about to be born and I’m going to witness it! Another moment in their history is about to be made! I know I’ve already said it twice, but once more for good measure. Holy. Shit.
Kellan
“It’s going to be awhile,” my brother sighs from the doorway of his wife’s hospital room.
Another perk of living at the palace is when something goes wrong, we have an entire wing set up to treat it. When I landed on my arm after an impromptu horseback riding contest, being hauled off a couple minutes over beat the hell out of waiting to be taken to the actual hospital and having to wait to see a physician. Plus, I’m convinced we have better pain meds.
He strolls towards the chair I’m waiting in. “Her progress is very slow at this point.”
“Is that because something is wrong? Is it because the baby is early?”
“Not that early,” Kris corrects, dropping down into the seat beside me. “And according to the books I’ve read and the lecture the doctor gave me a few moments ago, sometimes these things go very slowly.”
“How slowly?”
“Some women are in labor for up to twenty four hours.”
My face morphs into a mortified expression.
“Exactly!”
“Bloody hell…”
“It’s insane.”
I shake my head. “Can’t imagine trying to push something out of my body for twenty four hours…Hell..hours period.”
“Seems like evolution would’ve invented an easier system by now.”
“My thoughts precisely.”
He attempts to smile. “On the positive side, Soph seems fine at this moment. They’ve given her something, but at this time it’s pretty much a waiting game. She refuses to even have me call her parents until we have an actual child in our hands.”
“Where’s father?”
“He prefers to wait like they did in the 50s, with a glass of brandy and a good cigar in his office.” Kris tips his head towards the exit. “You can go if you like. You don’t have to stay. I’m sure you have business to attend. We can ring you like everyone when the baby has arrived.”
A sharp pang pumps in my chest. “You think…You think I would miss being here to see my niece or nephew born for work?”
He shrugs. “What else am I supposed to think?”
His attitude as well as his words crack my jaw.
“You’ve made it very very clear the most important thing to you right now is getting Hannah’s Hope off the ground. Why would I have any indication something like this would outrank that?”
“Because you’re my bloody brother!”
“And you’ve been ignoring your bloody wife!”
No need to hum your agreement.
I divert my eyes to the ground.
A surprisingly long lull occurs before Kris quietly speaks, “Let me ask you something, little brother. Do you see kids in your future?” When I lift my head to give him my attention, he adds, “As in your own. As in ones Brie was kind enough to bare for you?”
It’s a question I’ve actually begun to deliberate more seriously on the daily. Between the ceaseless amount of paperwork, phone calls, and meetings, my mind isn’t given the smallest sliver of time to wonder about my future as I plan for so many others. When we were engaged and we discussed having them it seemed like an automatic response to say yes. When she was at the alter and our vows were being said, it was an absolutely. But now? Now that I can’t even manage to make it to fucking lunch on time? Now that I can’t seem to recall without assistance what’s going on in the world outside of Hannah’s Hope? It seems unfair. Not to me, but her. To them. To have Brie and my future child or
children live with my endless divided attention is wrong. Beyond bloody selfish.
My lack of response causes Kristopher to nod. “You may not have the answer to the question now, which is fine. Honestly. Some people know right away, some people need time, and some people don’t realize how much they want them until they’re holding their own. However, if you do, I truly hope that Brie is still around to give them to you.”
His words strike anger as well as panic. “A few missed meals aren’t cause for divorce, Kristopher. That’s a bit melodramatic, even for you.”
The bemusement on his face is frightening. “Is that really all you think you’ve missed?”
“Kris….” Soph calls.
“Coming!” He promptly pops onto his feet leaving the question to linger in his wake.
Guilt sinks me further into my seat.
Just…Just a few meals and the first day of our friend’s vacation. Well, I guess first two since I missed most of today. I haven’t missed anything else…Have I? She hasn’t been forgetting to tell me things, has she? Or has she been telling me and because of my tunnel vision I can’t seem to remember what they were?
His implication bounces around my brain so viciously my other senses barely register when I’m no longer alone.
Brie softly questions, “Any news on the baby?”
I try to shake away the disorientation my brother caused and let my eyes meet hers. “Not really. Slow start.”
She simply nods.
“Are Jovi and Merrick, alright?”
“Oh yeah,” she brushes off, leaning to one side of her chair and letting her arm rest on the edge.
“Birth of the next in line for the crown, probably isn’t what they imagined would take place on their tour of the country, huh?”
For the first time in what feels like ages, she lightly snickers. “Probably not.”
I move my hand to connect to hers, but she swiftly pulls away, folding it in her lap.
That’s a new level of anger. Can’t honestly remember a time when I wasn’t allowed to touch her.
“Do they have everything they need for the evening? Are they crushed we won’t be having dinner out tonight?”
Brie shakes her head. “Nah. I think they’re relieved. We’ve been going non-stop since they got here yesterday.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. After we picked them up, we drove the scenic route, which made Jovi take pictures like crazy. When we got to the palace, we went on a tour with your father who rambled off so much history about this place it was insane. Like I didn’t know back in the day there was a policy house servants couldn’t hook up with the guests.”
“I didn’t know that either.”
“Your dad’s actually got a bunch of amazing information and a car collection that brought Merrick to his knees. Like his actual knees…”
Her words ignite the urge to chuckle yet I can’t.
“By the time we were all finished, Soph had this sweet welcome party set up in the parlor with drinks and snacks. After that we met Guy for dinner at that steak house with the white chocolate brownies-”
“Declan’s.”
“And then your father surprised us all with a late night trip on this beautiful luxury yacht he rented to let us see the city lights. They were stunning….Almost magical.”
“Wait. He rented a yacht?”
She nods, but continues to ramble, “We sipped champagne and laughed for hours. Soph fell asleep before we even made it far from the shore. Then this morning, we all had crepes before we met Guy to sight see. He actually had a couple of the art exhibits we visited closed to allow us private time. We were even given the chance to meet one of the artists at our last stop. She was a total gem. Invited the four of us to visit her personal studio.”
The flood of information shifts me in my seat. My strained voice struggles to say, “Sounds…like you’ve been having a blast.”
Her eyebrows lift. “Shocked?”
“At?”
“At all the shit you missed because you couldn’t or wouldn’t walk away from the work? You know, whichever way you want to label it?”
“Love-”
“Or maybe you’re shocked at the amount of fun I was able to have in spite of you not being there?”
“So you did, have fun without me? You weren’t…” the word sticks to my tongue as I realize I don’t possess the right to ask, “miserable?”
“Of course I was fucking miserable!” She snaps and the pain in my gut increases. “My husband doesn’t love me enough to walk away from work to spend time with me!”
“That’s not bloody true!”
“That’s exactly how it feels, Kellan!”
“Brie-”
“I don’t want to hear it!” The anger in her voice increases. “Any of it!”
“You don’t want an explanation?”
“I want there to be no need for an explanation, Kellan.” Her face falls and I attempt to touch her again receiving the same brush off. “I want to believe you when you say shit to me. I want to believe I matter. I want to believe that our life together is going to be more than a series of broken promises and rescheduled dinners.”
The words are out of my mouth before I have time to rethink them. “Do you want me to give up Hannah’s Hope?”
“I want you to learn to have room in your life for both of us.”
Is it an odd thing to wonder if that’s even possible?
All of a sudden my brother begins to shout. “Doctor Morgan!!! Nurse Lisa!!!”
The two of us rush for the doorway.
“What?! What’s happening?!” I belt out noticing the look of discomfort on Soph’s face.
“I-I-I-I don’t know! I think the baby is coming!”
“Stop yelling,” Brie fusses at both of us. “That’s unneeded stress on Soph.”
“God…what she said,” Soph groans, hands on her stomach.
“How could it possibly be coming? You said it was a slow progress.”
“That was three hours ago,” he bites.
Was I really wallowing in self misery that long?
The pair flies past us, quickly insisting we exit as promptly as we came.
We relocate back to our waiting room seats and sit in anxious silence. Not sure what I can say or even should say, I remain tight lipped while I do my best to focus on the life being born in the room right across from us.
Eventually my thoughts lead me to mumble, “Kristopher and I were actually born in that room as well.”
Brie doesn’t bother looking my direction. “Oh yeah?”
“Yes. Renovations were done shortly after my parents were married to this entire wing. They thought it would be a better idea to have a more accommodating hospital area. Before that the Kenningston women gave birth about….six rooms, that direction.” I point past her.
“Why the change?”
“My mother’s idea, I believe. She was an advocate for shaking things up.”
“Like you.”
The comparison causes me to nod yet fall silent once more.
Sometimes I wish she would’ve left me a little book of secrets. Small clues on how not to spoil the opportunities you’ve been given while battling to make more of other situations. Sometimes…I wonder if she would be ashamed at the constant way I keep failing. You know, the world sees so many of my successes like MINOH. Then they praise my attendance at asinine charity events to benefit banana trees and fashion shows where I dance to shitty music. But they don’t see the forgotten anniversaries or how I almost missed the weekend away with my brother to honor the woman we both miss. They don’t see me barely remembering to kiss my wife goodbye or the pain in her eyes when I come in the middle of the night only to leave again three hours later. They don’t see the look of disappoint my brother, my father, my sister in law give me because I’ve missed a family attendance to a play or card night in the parlor…They don’t know how hard I’m trying to be the best for everyone and am slowly becoming the wo
rst. Sometimes I wish my mother were around to at least remind me it’ll all be okay someday. Then again…will it?
About an hour later, the sound of an infant crying echoes throughout the halls. Doctor Morgan dismisses himself first and announces we’ll be allowed in to see them shortly. He explains the necessity to wash our hands, keep our voices soft, and to make our visit short because Soph desperately needs the rest as well as the bonding time with her new child. We immediately agree and he gives me the go ahead to phone my father. Shortly after doing so, Kris cracks the door open, and motions his head for us to come in.