by Callie Rose
My head stops spinning after a while, my vision clearing and my breath returning to semi-normal as he thrusts gently.
“I wanted you,” he murmurs, and I know I’m the you he’s talking about, but I don’t even know if he’s speaking to me right now. It sounds more like he’s talking to himself. “Even when I knew I shouldn’t. I knew you were trouble.” He makes a low sound that’s almost a laugh. “I was wrong about what kind of trouble, but I knew.”
I want to ask him what he knew and how he knew it, and why he thought he shouldn’t want me. But before I can say anything, he slides all the way out of me. Lifting me up, he gathers me in his arms and deposits me on my back on the bed.
I gaze up at him as he straightens. His cock is still hard, jutting out over his pants, which hang low on his hips. It’s slick with his own cum and my sticky wetness, and as I watch, he finally reaches up with one hand and tugs his shirt off. His muscles are thick and well-defined, his arms bulging and his abs contracting as he reaches down to shove his pants off next.
Part of me wonders why he’s bothering to get naked after the sex, but another part of me already knows the answer. The part of me that can feel the thread of tension between us, still unbroken even after the intensity of our first fuck, knows the truth.
This isn’t over.
We’re not done.
As if summoned by my words, Rome crawls up onto the bed with me. I spread my legs for him immediately, and he braces himself over me, his hips between my thighs. He’s looking at me the same way he did when he had his hand around my throat earlier. Or… almost the same way. His gaze is just as intense as it was then, but there’s something else behind it now. As I’m trying to figure out what that is, he reaches down between us, fisting his wet cock and bringing it to my entrance. He drags the tip over my clit a few times, stoking the fire inside me and proving that it hasn’t burned away everything yet.
There’s still plenty of tinder to fuel this flame.
Keeping his gaze locked on mine, he presses into me.
Where the first time was fast and hard, this time is slow and so deliberate it feels like he’s claiming every inch of me as I stretch around him.
When he’s fully rooted inside me, he takes my hands, lacing our fingers together before pressing the backs of my hands to the mattress above my head. I can’t touch him like this, can’t stroke the broad muscles of his chest or shoulders or back, can’t grab his ass to pull him closer or run my fingers through the rich brown of his hair.
But I think there’s a reason for that. I don’t think he wants me to touch him like that, even though he obviously craves the closeness of our bodies. We’re rocking in unison, our sweaty skin pressed together, our lips so close that our inhales and exhales combine. His fingers are tight around mine as if he’s trying to weld our hands together, but that’s the only touch he allows me.
I take it, squeezing his hands back and locking my legs around his hips, undulating beneath him to match his rhythm.
I’m going to come again. I can feel it building in the base of my spine, as inevitable as death and fucking taxes. But I don’t let it come too fast, clenching my toes and taking deep, gasping breaths every time I’m almost at the peak. I wait until my body is shaking, so full of pleasure it feels like it might burst. I wait until every brush of his skin against mine feels like lightning.
I wait until Rome is right there with me.
Only when he lets out a deep groan, his cock swelling inside me as the first lashes of his hot cum fill me up, do I let myself go. I come with him, straining against his hold on my hands as I lift my head from the mattress and crush my lips to his, locking my ankles together and grinding against him as he spills inside me.
And as he slumps against me, his body warm and hard and heavy against mine, the thread of tension between us finally snaps.
Chapter Twenty-One
We lie like that for several long moments. My entire body is limp, except for my hands, which are still clutching Rome’s so hard I’m afraid it might take a crowbar to separate us.
Finally, he drags in a breath through his nose and lifts his head up. We both unpeel our fingers from the knotted tangle of digits, and then Rome rolls off me, settling onto the mattress at my side. He pulls me against him, and I lie cradled in his embrace, my head resting on his chest.
If he were human, I’d be listening to his heartbeat.
It should bother me that there’s nothing to hear, but for some reason, it doesn’t. Whatever else he is, he’s Rome—the honorable vampire. The vampire who somehow pissed off an entire nest and earned his way back into the fold. I don’t want to know how he did the latter, but somehow I don’t think any human paid unnecessarily for it.
He strokes my hair, and I close my eyes, relishing in the brief moment of calm and connection.
“Why did you come here?” he asks me after a while. His voice is quiet, almost soft.
I could lie to him, but I don’t want to. He already knows so much. If I don’t tell him, he’s going to come to his own conclusions. The idea that he’ll be murderously angry at whatever those conclusions may be doesn’t bother me as much as the thought of him assuming that I used him. Which, to a certain extent, I did—but I think he’ll understand why once he knows the truth. At least, I hope he will.
“Nathan is my brother,” I murmur. “The tall, skinny tribute with the prison tattoos.”
“Ah.” He sighs. “The one you asked me to protect. Is the other your sister? Cousin?”
I shake my head. “No. Just a woman who’s doing what she thinks is best to make sure that her mother never has to suffer.”
He tightens his arm around me, comforting me. I return the embrace, then pull away. If I’m going to get through this, I’m going to need to not be distracted by his touch. I tuck my knees up to my chest and hug them.
“Nathan got himself in a lot of trouble, but not enough to end up here on his own. He was played, funneled into position and coerced into accepting. He doesn’t deserve to be here, and he won’t last long if he stays. He’s not—strong.”
It hurts me to say it out loud. I don’t like thinking of my brother as weak, even if it is the truth.
Rome stands and reaches a hand down to pull me to my feet. We’re both still naked, and cum is dripping down my leg, but there’s no self-consciousness at all. After what just happened between us, I’m way past the point of feeling vulnerable with him just because I’m not wearing any clothes. Somehow, I feel like he’s seen more of me than almost anyone else I’ve ever known, and I don’t mean the outside of me.
I mean the inside.
The shit that truly matters.
“You’re here to rescue him,” Rome murmurs, stepping closer to me. “From us, or from himself?”
I laugh a little, soft and sad. “Both, I guess. But I can’t save him from himself while he’s in danger here. I need to help him. He needs—he deserves a chance to have a real life.”
He strokes my face, his thumb trailing down my cheek and over my jaw. He tips my head up, and his eyes glow as he gazes down at me. The usual hardness in him is melted away in this moment, leaving him soft and warm and sad. He presses his forehead to mine, cradling my head in his hand. He kisses me gently, first one cheek, then the other, then takes my mouth with his.
He kisses me like he’s pouring everything he is into the gesture, like it hurts him but he can’t stop.
I’ve never been kissed like this before, but I’m not an idiot. I know what it means.
He’s telling me goodbye.
My heart hurts. I cling to him, memorizing the feel of his body, the taste of his mouth. I’m vulnerable, but so is he. It strikes me, ironically, that I’ve never felt safer.
He pulls away before I’m ready for him to, and I can feel his walls go up. It makes the room feel cold, and the few inches of space between us feel like a gaping chasm. I wrap my arms around myself and shiver.
“I will not tell anyone that you are a slayer
,” he says in a formal tone that sounds like an oath. “But if leaving is your mission, you should complete it soon. If I was able to figure out what you are, others will too—and they won’t have reason to show restraint.”
I wonder what he would say if I ask him what his reasons are, but I feel like our private altercations and conversations have already gone on too long. Someone is bound to notice. It’s not usual for vampires to visit tributes in their rooms. Too intimate, I suppose.
Rome hesitates for a moment, looking like he wants to say more. There’s a flicker of something in his eyes—some memory or emotion—but it’s gone as quickly as it came, leaving me with no idea what it was or where it came from. He dresses quickly, then turns back to me and nods his head slightly, stiff and formal.
A moment later, I’m alone in my room again.
I know he’s right. I’m out of time, and it’s now or never. It’s well into the afternoon by now—the equivalent of the middle of night around here.
After cleaning up quickly, I go to the wardrobe to grab clothes, mentally cursing the fact that I have no tactical wear here. It’s just a bunch of fucking dresses, but I tug on the one that I think will be easiest to move in.
It’ll have to do.
Turning away from the heavy wardrobe, I start to gather my things to go get Nathan, then stop.
Jessica.
Even if she isn’t in immediate danger from James, she certainly isn’t out of the woods. Like Nathan, she isn’t strong enough to last long around here. Maybe she has the guts, but physically, she gives all the vibes of a small, adorable, defenseless prey animal. If I can sense that, being nothing but a human hunter, how much stronger is that sense to the vampires? The worst of them will bleed her dry. Even the best of them will be hard-pressed to keep her safely alive for the length of her contract.
I know she’s going to argue with me, but I have to try. Moving carefully and quietly, I sneak out of my room and down the hall, past the bathroom and Winona’s room, as well as the rooms of several other tributes. I tap lightly on Jessica’s door and don’t wait for a response before I open it. She’s sitting on her bed, and she raises her eyebrows and smiles softly when she sees me.
“Hey. Can’t sleep?” she asks, understanding filling her hazel eyes. “I totally get it. This backwards schedule’s been a pain to get used to. I thought it would be like jet lag, easy to get over after a few days, but my internal clock is all messed up.”
Not even bothering to answer her question, I close the door silently behind me and then cross the room in a few strides. I sit down beside her and take her hand, squeezing it harder than I mean to.
She gives me a surprised look. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m getting out of here,” I murmur, my voice shaking. “I’m rescuing my brother. That’s the whole reason I came here in the first place.”
Her eyes widen. “You’re what?”
“How would you like to see your mom again?” I ask her, talking fast because I can already see the resistance on her face. “Hug her and talk to her and hold her hand? I can get you out of here too, Jessica. Come with me.”
She stares at me for a long moment as she processes what I just said. Then she throws her arms around me and hugs me.
“Oh my god, Darcy. I had no idea.” Her voice is a hushed whisper. “I… thank you.”
I hug her back fiercely, squeezing my eyes shut against a wave of too many emotions.
“I have to get some things from my room,” I tell her, choosing not to mention that the things I need are weapons capable of decapitating any vampire in the place. “Grab what you need and come with me.”
Jessica sighs and lets her arms drop, leaning back to smile at me sadly. She shakes her head.
“Thank you for trying to get me out of here,” she says quietly. “But I can’t.” She blinks rapidly, her eyes glistening. “I hope you’re able to get your brother out of here in one piece. I really do. I’m going to miss you so much. But I can’t go with you.”
I frown at her, my heart sinking. “Jessica—”
She shakes her head, her lips trembling. “If I violate the terms of the contract, they’ll kill my mother. Or remove their support and let her die slowly, which would be infinitely worse. The doctor they hired put my mom on this experimental drug—it’s stupid expensive and ridiculously difficult to get—but it’s working. She can walk with a cane again. She can grab things too, if they’re big enough for her to get a good grip on. She still can’t write or open pill bottles, and her vision is still spotty, but she’s getting better.”
I clench my jaw, hating that this sweet, selfless girl is caught between saving her mother’s life and her own. It should never have fucking come to this.
“We’ll figure it out,” I promise. “Whatever they’re paying for her care, I’ll come up with a way to get it. I’ll protect her from retaliation, and you too. It’s not going to be easy, but we can make it happen. Don’t you want her to be able to see you when she gets her sight back?”
Maybe that was manipulative, but the determination in Jessica’s eyes is making me panic.
She shakes her head sadly. “You can’t save everybody, Darcy. No matter how much you want to. Let’s face it, the vampires are the only ones with enough money and power to do what they’re doing for her. I can’t mess that up. I won’t. She doesn’t deserve to live in pain.”
“Neither do you,” I say desperately, but I can see that the argument is over. Jessica smiles at me and squeezes my hands again.
“You can’t keep everyone safe,” she repeats. “Sometimes you have to choose. I can’t leave—so go save your brother. He needs you.”
My stomach clenches. Her mind is made up; I can see it in every line of her face. She’s one of the softest, sweetest people I’ve ever met, but she’s clearly just as damn stubborn as I am.
More and more arguments tumble through my head, but I know none of them will convince her. None of them are strong enough to bend reality to my will.
I get up stiffly, forcing my unwilling feet to move. I don’t want to leave her. I always thought of Jessica as my best friend in this place, but now that it comes down to it, I realize with a shock that she’s become my best friend, period.
Jessica gets to her feet too, calm everywhere except her eyes. She’s as worried about me as I am about her, but she isn’t fighting me to make me stay. Maybe she has more faith in me than I do in either of us. Maybe that’s her strength—or her weakness. I can’t tell the difference anymore.
She hugs me so hard my bones creak, and I return the gesture. I have the sudden, stupid impulse to pick her up and carry her out of here, as if that wouldn’t attract way too much attention. She’s shaking. I wonder if she has the impulse to knock me out and keep me there. I guess we all have different ways of staying safe.
“Don’t die,” she orders, her voice hoarse. “Don’t you dare die.”
“I won’t if you won’t,” I say, then stop talking before my voice breaks.
Her face is wet with tears when I pull away. Maybe mine is too, I don’t know. I give her hands a final squeeze. She nods solemnly. I want to say something more, but what is there left to say?
We are, each of us, marching knowingly into mortal danger and probable death.
With pain burning a hole in my heart, I slip back down the hall and strap my weapons on.
Chapter Twenty-Two
My random wanderings have given me a better understanding of the palace layout. Vampires aren’t straightforward creatures, and the Baltimore underground is a twisted ruin. I’ve learned that getting to the men’s quarters undetected is infinitely easier if I walk away from it first, toward the dining hall, then keep going until I come to the passage which cuts diagonally across the back corner. From there, it’s a bit of a maze, but I’ve wandered it enough times to know where I’m going.
As I walk on silent feet, I pass the little alcove where Connor kissed me, and a wave of sadness threatens to break my focus.
I don’t want to think about the fact that I’ll never see him again.
I want to go find him. I want to get him out of here, have him come live with me somewhere sunny and bright like his personality.
But that would kill him. And he, eventually, would kill me.
I keep forgetting he’s a vampire. He seems so fucking human to me, and it’s not fair that he’s trapped as an undead monster. If there’s a way to un-turn a vampire, I’ve never heard of it. The magic that makes them what they are also keeps them alive. I can’t imagine a vampire,—especially one who had been mortally wounded in the moments before his turning—would survive a reversal, even if one was possible.
It’s pointless to keep thinking about him, but I can’t seem to get him out of my mind.
It’s the vampire magic, I tell myself. Not that I believe it.
Still, the thought gives me hope. If it’s just magic, it will fade. Then I’ll be able to shove all of these feelings and memories into a box in my mind and lock it up tight like I’ve done with so many other things.
I make it to Nathan’s room without seeing or hearing anyone. More importantly, I make it there without being seen. I don’t bother knocking this time. I just slip right in. My brother jerks up in bed and then scrambles to his feet as I close the door, looking foggy-eyed and tousled. Unlike Jessica, he was definitely asleep.
“What’s going on?” he asks, his words slurred and his voice rough.
“Shoes. Shirt. We’re leaving.”
“Wh—bu—Mimi,” he protests. “I’m not ready. I’m still sick from those damn women.”
“You’ve jumped fences with the cops on your ass after being up for four days spun out of your mind on meth and dehydrated within an inch of your life,” I snap briskly. “Get your damn shoes on.”