by Amelia James
Will rolled off me and I tried to get up, but Alex held me tight, his face a mixture of pain and sadness. I kissed him and he let me go.
We lay on the floor, silent and still. Will grabbed a blanket to spread over us. I leaned on his chest, listening to his heart beat steady and strong. He stroked my hair while Alex stretched out beside me, keeping space between us.
“I have to….” The words stuck in my throat and my heart pounded. I knew what I must do. My inaction was hurting people, and I had to find the courage to make it right. “I’m going to turn in Holland Spencer.”
“You’ll lose your job.” Alex leaned up on his elbow. “You might even face criminal charges.”
“I know, but I can’t let him get away with this any longer.”
“I’ll start an investigation.”
Will touched my face and looked into my eyes. “Maybe I can find a way to nail him without involving you.”
I squeezed his hand. “I appreciate that, but I’m the only one with proof he’s guilty.
And I can do it now.”
“I’ll defend you.” Alex sat up. “No. Damn it, I can’t.”
“Why not?” said Will.
“I’m leaving the firm. I’m leaving the whole damn state.
The DA’s office in Charleston, South Carolina offered me a job, and I took it. I turned in my notice yesterday.”
“Oh, Alex, why?”
“It’s a good opportunity.”
Alex smiled, but it faded quickly. “And I need to get away from here.”
Tears stung my eyes and I sat up, letting the blanket fall to my waist. His gaze lingered on my bare breasts, and I moved close to him. “You said you loved me.”
Will tensed behind me.
“Don’t believe anything I said, Talia. I manipulated you. I kept secrets from Will. I can’t be trusted.”
I touched his arm. “I trust you.”
“I don’t.” Will pulled me back.
Alex stood and pulled on his pants. He threw on his shirt and draped his tie around his neck. Picking up his coat, he headed for the door, but turned back with a sad smile for the man he used to call his best friend. “I’m sorry, Will.”
Will stood. “Good luck.”
“Thanks.” They nodded good-bye, and Alex turned to me, his eyes shiny and wet.
I stood and wrapped the blanket around me, wanting to say somethinganythingbut not knowing how to say goodbye.
Alex stepped closer and took my face in his hands. He kissed me, soft and slow. His lips parted as if he wanted to say something more, but he just shook his head and left.
My illicit lover walked out the door without looking back.
I stood in the cold, empty room, clutching the blanket to my chest.
I heard Will put his pants on. An innocent move, really
natural, normalbut nothing about this night was normal.
We weren’t normal. I felt everything at oncepain, guilt, anger, loneliness. Betrayal.
Alex had fucked me, loved me, and left me. Will had loved me, fucked with me, and stayed beside me.
He touched my shoulders and pressed his lips to my hair.
“He’s gone. It’s just us now.”
Just us? Of course. This had never been about me at all. Or Alex. Will had been protecting himself. I turned in his arms and stepped back.
“When your fiancée cheated, the sex didn’t hurt you, did it?
You were hurt because you didn’t see the affair happening.
You, a detective, got fooled.”
He dropped his gaze.
“You thought if you
controlled when and where, how often and even how Alex fucked me, you wouldn’t be humiliated again.”
“He broke the rules.”
“Rules? Will, your rules are so twisted I can’t even begin to understand. Did you really think Alex would satisfy my craving for something different, and I’d decide I only wanted you?”
He couldn’t bring himself to answer, but I didn’t need to hear it.
“You understood me better than anyone. That’s why I loved you. You thought you held me back, but I needed that security, especially when Holland threatened me.”
“You should’ve told me. I could’ve protected you.” He tried to pull me close, but I stood firm.
“By the time I met you, I was in too deep. Holland was taking advantage of me, and I couldn’t….” I stopped. I couldn’t blame Holland for my
problems. Or Alex, or Will.
They’d taken advantage of me because I let them. I’d destroyed the strong, smart, honest woman I used to be.
But Alex and Will had brought her back. How? They’d been my shelter, my friends
all the love I needed. And I’d lost them. “I couldn’t see I had everything I needed right in front of me.”
“I’m still here.” Will’s husky voice cracked.
“You were the one thing that kept me grounded. When everything else in my life was uncertain, I knew I could come back to you. We might have lasted, but….” A sob caught in my throat, and I shook my head. “But we screwed up too much. I want to forgive you, but even if I could, I can’t trust you.”
He turned away, yanking his fingers through his hair. “I know.”
In profile, I barely
recognized him. Pain distorted his strong, stoic face. Jagged lines of grief ran from his haunted eyes to his determined jaw.
“I can’t forgive myself.”
I reached for him, caressing his weary cheek, then threw my arms around his neck.
He pulled me close and we held each other, clinging to the love we’d once shared. When it ended, when his heart had turned cold again, he gently pushed me away.
“Don’t go.” Damn it, I can make this work.
“I have to.”
“I need you.”
He kissed the top of my head. “You don’t need me. You don’t need Alex. You’re stronger than both of us.”
“Only because of you.”
“Then maybe something good came out of this. Good for you.” He picked up his jacket and headed for the door. “I gotta figure out what I learned, if anything.” A deep sigh wracked his body. Then he opened the door and walked out of my life.
For the second time that night, I watched a man I loved leave me. A hysterical giggle escaped my lips as I silently thanked God I wasn’t sleeping with anyone else. More giggles erupted, and I laughed out loud at the ridiculousness of it all.
Tears streamed down my face, and when the laughter stopped, sobs overwhelmed me, rattling my body from head to toe.
Eventually my tears ran out, the sobbing stilled, and the sun came up.
***
I called in sick, spending the morning writing my letter of resignation. When I’d signed the final draft, I took my time getting dressed and driving into the office, determined to remain calm for my last day.
As I passed Alex’s office, I overheard his assistant Lindsay tell a client that he was in court, then leaving as soon as the trial was over.
I cleaned out my office, collecting every scrap of evidence I had implicating Holland Spencer. I hesitated over a piece of paper, deciding finally to put it in my pocket and not in the box. Holland’s client listmy personal insurance in case things ever went sour.
At the police station, the detective in charge of white collar crimes frowned suspiciously when I asked him for the name of a good defense attorney, but I couldn’t trust anyone at my own firm.
Will brought in a suspect as I left, wrestling the man to the ground when he tried to escape.
My heart pounded, and I fought the desire to surrender and beg Will to put me in handcuffs. He never noticed me, and I walked outside unrestrained.
The pale yellow sunlight failed to penetrate the overcast sky. I buttoned my coat all the way to my chin, but the winddriven cold pierced the damp wool, stabbing my body with chilling needles. Another storm was coming. Winter had gone on too long, and I was tire
d of it. I needed something new, something different.
Will believed I was stronger alone, but I didn’t feel it.
Not yet.
Her Twisted Pleasure
I still wanted to give Alex the beating he deserved, but I couldn’t let him move away
maybe for goodwithout buying him a beer.
He raised his bottle and tapped it against mine. “Here’s to better days.”
“I’ll drink to that.”
“And nice titties.” He smiled at the stripper bending over him. “I’m gonna miss this place.”
“I’m sure there are strip clubs in South Carolina.”
He shrugged and stuffed a dollar in the dancer’s G-string.
“Have you talked to, um…?”
“No. I think she’s done with us.”
“Yeah, looks that way.” He polished off his beer, and we ordered another round.
“Probably for the best.”
“Uh-huh.” He might be finished with Talia, but I wasn’t gonna give up so easily.
“Hello, boys. Would either of you like a lap dance?”
“Hell yes.” Alex scooted his chair back and patted his thigh before I even got a look at the dancer.
“Thank you.” She sparkled from head to toe, her radiant skin glowing like a beacon in this dark, dank place, her brilliant smile drawing looks from men all over the room.
Alex stuffed her purse with a wad of bills as she tossed her thick black hair over her shoulders, leaning close and teasing him with her perfect breasts.
“You are beautiful.” Alex shifted under her.
“You’re rather handsome yourself.”
Too beautiful and wellmannered.
She looked more like
a princess than a stripper, but she was taking her top off, so I kept quiet.
“What’s your name?” She gyrated in his lap, slightly out of sync with the music.
“I’m Alex. He’s Will.”
She flung her leg over him and spun around, flashing that gorgeous smile in my direction.
“Hi Will.”
“Hi, gorgeous. What do we call you?”
“I’m Daliah.” She leaned back against Alex, arching her boobs toward his face while her shiny hair cascaded down his arm. Her nipples stayed soft and flat. Either she just did this for the money, or management needed to turn up the AC.
Alex whispered something in her ear, and Daliah sat up, giggling. She leaned close to me and dragged her short, French manicured nails down my thigh. “Is he always so naughty?”
I rolled my eyes. “He’s just getting started.”
His fingers drifted across her ass, and she swatted his hand away. “No touching…
unless you want to give me a nice tip.”
“Oh, I’ve got a tip for you, baby.”
Her laugh tinkled like champagne glassesway too classy for this place. “Cash, sweetheart. You pay, I play.”
She winked.
Guess she didn’t know she was talking to a cop. I had cause to arrest her, but suspected this kind of solicitation came from someone further up. Better to come back later and go after the source.
And Alex was looking at her like he wanted to play hard.
Not a bad idea. Why sit on the sidelines?
Daliah grabbed Alex’s shoulders and leaned back, her silky black hair spilling across my lap.
I grabbed a handful and held her down, admiring her beautiful, ample breasts.
“Wanna play with both of us?”
Her pink nipples peaked. “I do love team sports. There’s a motel across the street.”
Alex shook his head. “Nah, that place is a shithole.”
Should I ask how he knows that?
“I turned in my keys this morning,” he said. “So I booked a room at the Hilton for tonight. Beautiful lady like you should have a nice place.”
Did she blush? Hard to tell in the dim light. But Alex was rightshe deserved better than a sleazy motel.
“Let’s go,” she said.
Daliah covered up with a boring beige trench coat, and we shared a cab to the hotel.
On the way, Alex stuffed more money in her purse, paying for the chance to make out with her. I slipped my hand under her coat and stole a touch of her thighs. She moaned and turned to kiss me as we pulled up to the lobby. I paid the driver and followed Alex and Daliah to the elevator.
Why am I always chasing after him and a woman I want?
“I have a king-sized bed so there’s room for all of us.” Alex unlocked his door held it open for her as she breezed in.
“Mmm… very nice.” Daliah scanned the room while Alex slid his arms around her and tried to unbutton her coat. She let it slide to her elbows as she turned and showed off her skimpy costume, and held out her hand. “Cash first, from both of you.”
My wallet held more money than usual. Maybe I’d hoped something exactly like this would happenmindless, nostrings-
attached sex to help me get over… her. I handed Daliah a couple of hundreds, but she cocked an unimpressed eyebrow so I gave her another one.
Alex gave her at least that much, probably more.
“Thank you, gentlemen.
You’re both under arrest.”
***
“You’re fucking kidding me.”
I snarled at Will. “How did you not figure out she was a cop?”
“Why didn’t you?”
Yeah, I should’ve known, but damn it, I needed to get laid, and I wasn’t too proud to pay for it. I hadn’t gotten any since we’d fucked Talia two weeks ago.
“Save your excuses for the judge.” The stripper had buttoned her coat up to her chin.
“Jesus Christ, what are we gonna do?” Will yanked his hands through his hair, pacing at the foot of the bed.
I could read his thoughts: his career was over. And with a criminal record, I’d never keep my new job as a prosecutor.
“Daliah… that’s not your real name. Officer…?”
“Detective Tanner.”
Will stopped pacing and stared at her. “Why don’t I know you? What precinct are you from?”
“Internal Affairs.”
He stumbled back, panic and confusion driving him toward the balcony as if he was trying to escape. “Why is Internal Affairs investigating me? I’m not dirty.”
“That’s classified.”
Classified? Was she a fed?
Holy shit, this is not good.
“Maybe we can make some sort of arrangement.”
Daliah backed off Will and raised an eyebrow at me.
Damn, that’s sexy. “Neither one of us can risk an arrest.”
“You should’ve thought of that before you solicited me.”
Will groaned, collapsing in the desk chair. “I’m a vice cop, and I’m gonna get busted for solicitation. I’m seriously fucked.”
We were both gonna be fucked if I couldn’t get us out of this clean. I crossed my arms over my chest, hiding my shaking hands. “Name your price.”
“I don’t have one.” She mimicked my posture, standing her ground.
“Listen, I’ve worked with cops and criminals too long to buy that. How much to forget you ever met us?”
“How much do you have on you?”
I frowned. “Plenty.”
“I do too.” Will stood up and dug out his wallet.
She looked at Will, at his money, then back to me as if calculating how many bills I carried. “Hand it over.”
Will waved a wad of cash at her, but I held up my hand.
“First, we agree to terms.”
“I’m listening.”
“Nothing leaves this room.
You forget our names and our faces. If you’re investigating Will, or me for that matter, this incident stays off the record.
This never happened, and we never see you again.” I nearly spit the last words at her.
She glanced at Will, and he gave her such a pathetic look I could’ve kicked him in th
e crotch to make sure he still had balls.
“Done.” She held out her hand.
We emptied our pockets, filling her purse until the sequins nearly popped off. She forced the zipper closed and tucked it under her coat.
“Pleasure doing business with you, boys.”
Will growled and I bolted the door behind her. “What the fuck just happened?” I stumbled back into the room, my legs faltering under me.
“What the hell were you thinking, man?” Will clenched his fist and slammed it against the wall.
“What was I thinking?
You’re the vice cop. You should’ve seen this coming.”
Really, I was berating myself.
Reading people was my specialty. I usually knew a liar the minute she opened her mouth… but not this time. Had I lost my gift?
“We could’ve lost everything our jobs, our reputations.”
“I took care of it!” My head spun, and I dropped down on the bed.
“How do you know she
won’t change her mind? You can’t trust a dirty cop.”
Not my problem. Tomorrow I’d leave Chicago behind me for good. “If it comes up again, I’ll bury it. I know how to make problems go away.”
Will snorted. “Yeah, keeping secrets is what you’re best at.”
I turned on him, about to snap back, but something about our stripper/cop encounter was bugging me more than his comments. “Did you see her badge?” I asked. “Was it real?”
“She never showed a badge.
I never asked to see it.”
Oh shit. “Don’t cops always show a badge when they’re making an arrest?”
“I do.”
Damn it! “Will, buddy, I think we just got screwed.”
“Who would want to…?” A light bulb switched on in his eyes.
Talia. “That bitch fucked us over! I am going to” I stomped toward the door, but Will grabbed my arm.
“You’re going to what? Get revenge? We screwed her over much worse than this. We deserved it.”
The guilt on Will’s face should’ve reached into my heart, but the humiliation of being conned by two women overpowered any shadow of remorse.
“She robbed us!”
“Let it go. If this is what it takes to make Talia happy, then I’m glad I could do something for her.”
“So I gotta let her walk away with my money and my pride?”