“That doesn’t answer my question. Why did you come to the hospital, then?”
Jay shrugged. “I guess I wasn’t ready to give up Mason yet, either.”
Katie ran her hand through her hair, letting out a loud breath to calm herself. “Thank you for bringing him back, Jay. Let’s just give it a day or two, then we can talk and come up with a plan that works for both of us.” She disliked the diplomatic tinge in her voice, but it sure beat the high-pitched shrieks of outrage, anger, and overall exasperation that she wanted to hurl at him.
Jay shoved his hands into his pocket, nodding. “Thanks for not telling the cops. Or involving the courts.”
“I don’t want it to have to come to that. Neither of us do.” She chose her words carefully, but the connotation was clear: I don’t want to resort to it, but I would. She squeezed the police officer’s business card tighter in her palm.
Jay leveled a knowing glare at her. He understood. “We’ll talk soon, Katie. Let Mason know I’ll call him soon, too.” He took a tentative step back, swiveling his glare between her and Chad. “Again, I’m sorry. I am. And thank you.”
She opened her mouth to respond. His gaze had turned toward Chad, and it caught Katie’s attention. She wanted to stop him, to tell him to wait and explain what the unreadable expression on his face meant, but Jay was slinking out the door without another word.
“Is he all right?” Chad asked once he disappeared outside.
“I was just wondering the same thing.” She stared out the door, but there was no sign of him.
***
For the first time, Chad walked into the cafeteria with Katie, and the sight of him pushing his walker into the room with a slow but steady pace affected Hayden visibly. He looked him up and down as he moved, and fought to look away when he realized she and Chad were staring back at him. Instead of commenting on it, Chad focused his attention on Mason.
“Did you find that cinnamon bun you were on the hunt for?”
Mason glanced at Hayden, pursing his lips together. “Cinnamon bun? What cinnamon bun?” He held up his hands, revealing the frosting covered fingertips, and he and Hayden both chuckled together.
“He found it, and conquered it,” Hayden grinned.
“Well played, Little Man.” Chad rolled his walker up to their table and awkwardly maneuvered it around so he could sit on the seat. “Thanks for bringing him in here for a bit, Dad.”
“More than happy to, son.”
Chad looked like he wanted to say more, but instead, he turned to Liz, who was stirring a plastic stir stick in her coffee absently. “And thank you for bringing Mason back here, too.”
Liz ignored the comment. “Did Jay leave?” When Chad nodded, she bit the inside of her lip, debating whether to speak about him further. “Is he okay?”
“Funny, we both wondered that, too. I’m not really sure.” Katie took the seat opposite Liz, beside Mason. “Are you? Okay, I mean?”
Liz laughed at that. “Don’t worry about me. I was just trying to help rectify a situation as best as I could. All I knew was what he told me, which wasn’t much. He actually apologized to me, numerous times, said he needed time with his thoughts, and then said he needed me to bring Mason here, so I did. But after sitting here with Hayden for a few minutes, I’ve been brought up to speed on a few things...and so has he, I reckon.” She gave Hayden a sideways glance, not of amusement, but not completely serious, either. Mutual understanding, perhaps. “I didn’t know that Jay had take—” Her gaze cut toward Mason. “I didn’t know what he’d done. I want you to know that.”
“Thanks, Liz.” Katie meant it.
Liz stood, pushing her coffee into the middle of the table. “Oh, one more thing.” She dug into her back pocket, pulling out a folded envelope. She held it out to Katie.
Katie took it, seeing only her name written in a messy scrawl on the front of it. It was sealed.
“That’s Jay’s writing.”
“He asked me to give it to you. I don’t know anything more, I swear.” Liz held up her hands.
“You’ve been very helpful. I’m sorry you were brought even further into this.”
“At this point, Katie, I just hope I made a positive impact somehow, because we both know it didn’t start out that way.”
Katie was a bit taken aback at Liz’s reference to her affair with Jay, but Liz’s sad smile spoke volumes beyond her words. Liz bent and gave Hayden a quick hug before making her way out of the cafeteria, patting Mason on the head and giving Chad’s shoulder an encouraging squeeze before leaving them to talk amongst themselves.
Mistakes; they’ve been made by everyone, Katie thought to herself.
Chapter Eighteen
Katie knew she should take Mason back to Chad’s apartment so he could sleep somewhere comfortable. The cushions of the couch in Chad’s hospital room barely compressed where his little body lay across them, and the thin hospital blanket combined with Katie’s jacket was hardly comparable to the plush warmness of the comforters and cotton sheets that would cover him at the apartment. He’d awoken twice, though. Both times she’d tried to move him into a position where she could pick him up and take him to the truck, and both times he had groggily asked to stay and have a sleepover with Chad. Katie couldn’t bring herself to begrudge him that; he had obviously worried about Chad during his time away.
So she left him there, his arm slung awkwardly over the side of the couch, his knees bent to bring his legs up close to his body. He snored softly, and the sound made her smile.
“Are you going to open it?”
Katie turned to Chad when he spoke; unaware he’d been watching her so intently. She had been contemplating opening the envelope Liz gave her earlier, turning it over again and again in her hands. She hadn’t even broken the seal on it yet, though, let alone read it.
What was enclosed inside intrigued her, but she was frightened by it as well. It wasn’t so much the words that might be written on the paper within it. The memory of the bleak desolation in Jay’s eyes when he’d left the hospital, and the hollowness and raw emotion in his voice when he’d apologized to her on the phone...those were the things she feared most.
“I want to,” she replied in a low voice, looking up at him. The nurse had lowered the height of his bed, and Katie, for the first time, had helped him to transfer himself from the wheelchair to the bed, without the assistance of nursing staff or therapists. Katie had planned to ask him if the doctors had perhaps mentioned anything more about being discharged home in the near future, but so many other subjects had come up beforehand, she hadn’t had the chance yet. “But I’m afraid to, even though I know I have to.”
Chad reached down beside his bed where Katie had pulled the armchair up again, and he squeezed her shoulder gently. “So much has happened to you, Katie. And Jay just walked out of here after all of it. I know that it was your choice to make, but maybe if you read that letter, you’ll have a real sense of closure or something. I can tell you’re not completely at ease with the outcome.”
Katie hadn’t mentioned her feelings about Jay’s retreat. Chad was right; knowing he’d walked away without any true consequences for his actions was a little disheartening, but she’d been the one to let him go, with the only comfort being that the police now had a record of the discord between them. Katie had Officer Phillips’s phone number. If anything were to be said or done from here on in, she wouldn’t hesitate to call her.
Many people undoubtedly thought her to be ridiculously gullible and naive for not turning him in, but Katie had her reasons. She had every right to turn him over to the police, and she hadn’t. Jay was well aware of that fact.
After everything, would he try a similar stunt—or worse—again?
Katie couldn’t say for sure, but something about his demeanor, his seemingly genuine embarrassment, made her believe deep down that he wouldn’t. The worst with Jay was over.
It had to be.
“Just open it.” Chad chuckled, leanin
g his head back on the pillow. “I don’t need to know what it says, but you do. Just go ahead and do it.”
Katie glanced up to see him let his eyes fall shut. The day’s events were catching up to him, weighing his eyelids down with exhaustion. She didn’t think he would fall asleep just yet, but he was trying to give her a moment to herself, the only sliver of privacy he could offer.
She slid her finger under the sealed edge of the envelope and let the outer edge of it rip in a jagged line. Only one sheet of paper tumbled from inside, and it was creased deeply, the paper soft with wear. It had been folded and refolded many times.
His familiar lopsided writing greeted her when she unfolded it, a mix of cursive writing and printing that was signature to Jay. The black ink was smudged from his left hand dragging across it as he wrote.
Katie,
I’ve said it once already, but I may never be able to say it enough to make up for all that’s happened.
I’m sorry.
You’re right, it didn’t have to be this way. But it is, and I am more sorry for my part in it than you’ll ever know. I let my jealousy and my pride dictate my actions, and those actions were cruel, uncalled for, and dangerous. More hurt has been felt because of what you and I have become than was ever necessary, and it was felt by all parties, for different reasons.
None of us are innocent in this whole mess, Katie, but maybe none of us are really the bad guy, either.
Mason is in good hands, I know that. I’ve always known that. You’re a good mother, Katie. I hope there was a time when you could say the same thing about me as a father.
I owe Chad an apology, as well. He is a good man, and I know he will be good for Mason. He’s good for you, too; better than I could ever be. Be sure to thank him for his phone call last night. Between your words and his, I know we’ll be all right.
You deserve happiness, Katie, and I know now that you won’t find it with me. It took too much time and too much pain for me to realize that, but please know that I do hope you find it, whatever—or whoever—your happiness is.
Love, Jay
Katie felt a lump forming in her throat, and she turned the page over twice in her hands, willing more words to appear, something to explain Jay’s mindset while writing it. There was nothing else, though, and purely to force down the worry that rose acidly in her stomach, Katie read the letter out loud to Chad.
“Why does it sound so...final?” she asked him, turning the letter toward him as though he could see something she couldn’t.
“Maybe we’re just reading too much into it,” Chad offered, but his tone betrayed him. He was interpreting the tone of Jay’s words the same way she was. With a niggling concern. “Keep in mind, he wrote this before your confrontation with him and the police officers today. Didn’t he say he hadn’t planned on facing you?”
“He did. But what did he plan on doing, then?” she whispered hastily.
“I think you’re getting worked up about nothing, Katie. When Jay left here, he was ashamed and dejected, sure, but things were on more solid ground between you and him than they had been in ages, and there was a plan to make everything work for everyone regarding Mason. He’ll be okay. We all will be.”
“What did you say to him?”
“Pardon?”
She held up the letter as proof. “Jay said you called him. What did you say? I had no idea you did that.”
“And I’d have preferred you didn’t,” Chad smirked. “I called him a few hours after you talked to him yesterday. I wasn’t sure if I should, but I figured the worst thing he could do was hang up on me. Don’t worry, I was completely civil. I wanted to help, if I could.”
“You still haven’t told me what you said.”
“It was nothing earth-shattering. I just told him the truth; that I wasn’t trying to steal his family from him, I was just trying to protect my own. I told him I wasn’t married to you, and Mason wasn’t my son, but that I loved you both more than anything, so I hoped that counted for something.” He smiled down at Katie as she slid her hand into his. “I swore to him that I’d never try to replace him as Mason’s father, and reminded him that it wasn’t possible, anyway.”
“So, you said most of the things I’d already said to him,” Katie pointed out with a crinkled brow.
“Basically, but somehow, coming from me—the man he saw as the biggest threat against him—I think it meant something completely different. I tried to level the playing field. To remove the perceived threat, so to speak.”
“Well, it seems you did exactly that. Did he say anything in response to that?”
“I did most of the talking, really. He listened without hanging up on me, though, so that was enough of a response for me,” he shrugged. “I just wanted to be honest with him, and say what I needed him to hear.”
“Is that really all you said to him?” she asked.
“It’s all I’m willing to admit to right now,” he grinned. “It’ll all work out, Katie. I’m not trying to dismiss what happened, I swear it. I just want you to give yourself some time to think about something other than the what-ifs and countless scenarios running around in that pretty little head of yours. Give yourself a break.”
She let out a large puff of air to calm herself. “All right, what else have you got in mind to talk about, then?”
“Oh, Katie, don’t leave me open to answer a question like that with just anything. I’ve got quite a few things running rampant in my head, too, and not all of them are things that should be topics of public conversation.”
Katie rolled her eyes. “You know what I meant. You’d better pick a topic that is suitable soon, or else I’m liable to continue on my tangent all evening.”
“Let’s talk about next week.”
“What’s next week?” She fought to pinpoint the date, and she couldn’t come up with anything that she thought he could be referring to.
Chad met her gaze with a slow, mischievous smile. “Today, they mentioned discharging me from here. Maybe next week.”
Katie swung her legs down off the arm of the chair, pushing herself upright in her excitement.
“Chad, that’s fantastic! I can’t believe you didn’t say anything until now!”
“I wouldn’t have let you go to sleep tonight without letting you know,” he remarked. “Nothing is written in stone yet, but the therapist said as soon as they can get home supports in place, I should be able to go home. Finally.”
Finally. Katie cherished the word. He had worked so hard, and it had been so long since he’d seen the inside of his own apartment—or even outside the hospital grounds, for that matter. She wondered what a triumph it must be to have the same doctors who hadn’t been sure whether he would live or die, be able to tell him that he could finally go back to his own life. “That’s amazing.”
“I’m feeling pretty good about it,” he laughed softly. “But I’ll admit, it’s an odd feeling. I mean, where do we go from here?”
“Anywhere you want, I suppose.” She thought of mentioning their agreement with Jay about creating a schedule, and how that might affect their decision as to how to move on, but she choked the thought back down. Chad had told her to give herself a break from thinking about it, and she vowed to try.
“Anywhere we want, you mean. I hope that’s what you mean.”
“Of course. It goes without saying at this point.” Her eyes glistened. “As long as that’s how you want it.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Katie.”
“Just checking.”
“Good. Now that we’ve got that out of the way...” He cleared his throat. “You mentioned once before wanting to get back into nursing. You loved your job before taking over the farm.”
Katie nodded hesitantly. “Well, yes, but it sounds like you’re going to require home care of some sort as well, before they’ll let you out of here. Maybe we should focus on that first, instead of on me and the prospect of another position right now. And, speaking of the farm�
��”
“Maybe that’s where we should be. The farm.” Chad shrugged at his own idea, as though it were the most natural decision in the world. “At least until I get out on tour again.”
“I actually meant to tell you about that.” Tension bunched in Katie’s shoulders. “I had an offer on the farm. And I accepted it.”
Chad’s eyebrows rose high on his forehead. “You did? You didn’t even negotiate?”
“The buyer put an offer in at the asking price, which was well above what I would have expected it to be worth. More than I’d need to pay off the mortgage, so I’d still have a bit left over.”
“Katie, are you—”
“There was no bickering about price.” She continued to ramble. “No back and forth, none of that. The offer came in from some incorporated company for what it was listed at, and I accepted it. It was simple, really. If I had given myself time to think about it, I might have chickened out.”
“All right. So, I’m assuming you have had time to think about it now. How are you feeling about your decision now? Is it still what you want?”
“I’m conflicted about it,” she admitted, staring down at her fingers. “Was it the right or the wrong decision? I really don’t know. But what’s done is done, and I can’t go back on it. We have to move on, right?” She asked, but her attempt at optimism was feeble.
“Jesus Christ, Katie...”
She lifted her head to glare at him, alarmed. “Are you mad at me for selling it?”
“No. God, no.” He shook his head, and a slow smirk began to form at the corner of his mouth. “But seeing how unsure you are now, I’m certainly glad I’m the one that bought it, and not someone else.”
Katie stared at him for a long time, not comprehending. “You bought the farm.”
“So, you did hear what I said,” he joked. “Yes, I bought it. I told you I would pay you back for the medical bills.”
“Well, I know, but—” she stammered. “You didn’t have to do that. Why would you do that?”
When Worlds Collide (My Kind Of Country Book 3) Page 16