by Eve Newton
“Stop fucking calling me fucking Alice!” I yell at him.
“Oh, my dear girl, our first night together and I think I am going to have to wash your mouth out with soap.”
“Try it and we will see just how much you like being impaled on the business end of a sword made from Hellfire,” I snarl at him.
“Your sense of humor is abhorrent.” He sniffs. “You know how sensitive I am about that thing.”
“Oh, poor you,” I say and turn on my side to face him. He stays on his back. “Tell me something. When you take me, will I just be asleep the whole time or will I be, you know, wasting away?” I ask him quietly.
He slowly turns his head to look at me. “Oh, bless you. You think I am going to take you for the whole seven days.”
“You aren’t?” I ask surprised.
“Of course not, my dear. I will only take you when you sleep. I want you healthy and focused, otherwise, yes, you will start wasting away. It will be slight in your case, you wouldn’t even notice it, but the process would begin.”
“Oh,” I say, a bit relieved that at least I don’t have to spend an entire week asleep and with him. Although, I do quite like the idea of sleeping for a whole week. “You feed off me to stay in the dreams?”
“In a manner,” he says shortly.
“When will you start?” I ask.
“When you leave here. You haven’t fed in a while. You are getting docile,” he admonishes me.
I do feel tired and hungry. Crap. It never even occurred to me about feeding. Devon and Constantine are right, I really am ridiculous. I agreed to stay here where there are no humans to feed from, and I can say with absolute certainty that a Faerie Feeder won’t be provided for me to snack on. It hits me like a ton of bricks then that this is what Constantine’s plan was all about. He knew I wouldn’t heal up properly without feeding, and he knew I wouldn’t be able to do that here. “Thanks for the reminder, ghost boy,” I say and turn onto my back again.
“Ghost boy? That’s very insulting. I am neither a ghost nor a boy,” he says, offended.
“How old are you?” I ask.
“In what sense?”
“Both,” I say, knowing he means how old he was when he died and how many years he has been in existence.
“I was in my twenty-first year when I was slain and that was over three thousand years ago.”
“How old is Tiamat?” I ask, dying to know Her real age.
“That creature is over six thousand years old,” he replies with disdain.
“Oh. Wow. That’s like Old Testament old.” CK had said he thought She was around four thousand. He was way off.
He snorts in amusement but doesn’t say anything.
We sit in silence for a bit, then I break it. “How come you aren’t trying to kill me anymore?”
“How come you aren’t trying to kill me anymore?” he asks me back.
“Because you aren’t trying to kill me anymore,” I say as if it’s obvious.
“Oh. Well, your part in the bigger picture is becoming clearer,” he says mysteriously.
“What is the bigger picture?” I ask. I am not so sure I like his tone.
“That I can have you in your dreams. I already explained this to you. I can give you everything you ever wanted out of life, or death.” He says this with an odd look, and I am fairly certain that he is lying to me.
“I already have everything I want,” I say quietly.
“I have been inside your head, Aefre. I know that isn’t true.” He looks at me again. “Don’t you get it? It isn’t about being with a certain somebody or having a life with them or a baby or any of the big stuff. It’s about all the little things I can do for you.”
“I don’t know what you mean.” I frown at him.
“Think about it, Aefre. If you could go back in time and have or do anything you want, big or small, what would it be? And don’t lie to me because I already know. I just want you to say it out loud,” he says.
“I don’t want to,” I sulk, and he laughs at me.
“You don’t have to be shy about it. Just say it. Go back a thousand years and say what the first thing is that you could do if you could relive it.”
“Kill Radulf myself for being an abusive, disgusting wife beater and a rapist,” I shout, suddenly sitting up.
“There you go. Does that feel better? I can give that to you,” Remiel says and I stare at him.
Actually, it does feel better. I sink back to the bed. “But it won’t be real,” I say sadly.
“It will be real in our world. The one I will create for you, and that is just the start, Aefre. Anything and everything you ever wanted, no matter how small or how big.”
“How can you do that? How can you have so much power that you can create dream worlds and yet you can’t exist in the real one?” I ask.
“Dream worlds are easy. The real one takes effort,” he says darkly.
“No shit,” I mumble. I turn back onto my side to stare at him. “Remiel?”
“Yes, Aefre.”
“Why can’t you feed off live creatures?”
“Excuse me?” He turns onto his side as he frowns at me.
“Live creatures. People, Humans, Vampires, whatever. Why do they have to be dead?”
“Why do you ask?” he queries.
“It’s a valid question, under the circumstances,” I say.
“Why are you so concerned? Do you want me to be real and stay in this world?” he asks, and I can hear the hope in his voice. I reach out to touch him automatically in comfort, forgetting about the barrier he keeps around himself, but I actually touch him. He had dropped the forcefield and my hand is resting on his chest.
“I just want to understand you. Understand what you are. Is it possible? If you feed in the dreams why not right here, right now?” I don’t really know why I want to know so badly; I just do.
“I told you, dreams are easy, guards are dropped, it is easy to siphon off enough energy to maintain a creation. But it requires so much more,” he admits.
“I am so much more,” I say and wonder vaguely why these words are coming out of my mouth. “You are part Dragon, man, buck up. If I can do it, so can you.” I sit up and cross my legs, holding my hands out to him.
“Aefre, what are you doing?” he asks me seriously.
Good fucking question. What am I doing? Have I lost all of my senses?
“Trying to understand you,” I say again.
“I don’t want to be understood,” he says huffily.
“I think you do. You are miserable and lonely and your need for revenge isn’t even there anymore. What else is there, Remiel, except to try?” I press.
“I don’t get you,” he says and sighs as he sits up. “You are the most baffling creature I have ever come across and believe me, I have seen my fair share of puzzlers. Why would you do this after what I have put you through?”
“Mean and confusing as that was,” I say and frown at him, “I understand your need for payback, but you shouldn’t have taken it out on me. I feel what happened to you was unjust. You couldn’t help who you were, that your powers were stronger than everyone else’s and they felt threatened, so they executed you instead of helping you. Trust me, I know what it’s like to be born under a cursed moon.”
“Hmm, how do you know I didn’t deserve it? I have hardly told you anything about myself, girl. Maybe I was a monster who needing putting down,” he says, an evil glint in his eye.
“Maybe you were. But haven’t you paid enough for your sins?” I ask him gently.
“Simple as that? You forgive at the drop of a hat. You are a silly girl,” he admonishes me.
“Do you want me to help you or not? The insults are not endearing you to me,” I say, holding up my hand in protest.
“I mean it with all affection. For the record, I was not a monster. I was simply a powerful being who wanted to use his power to rule,” he explains.
“Well, then, what is there to forgive?
And FYI, ruling sucks. I would much rather have carried on with my normal Vampire life without any of these additional hassles,” I tell him.
“Those additional hassles are shaping your future, Aefre. I know what your hopes and dreams are. I know what you hope will happen in the future with your sire. That wouldn’t be possible without your extra Powers,” he says quietly.
“Yes, well. After being slashed to ribbons and thrown out of a tower window by that sire, he can forget about any future with me. Not to mention the other thing,” I say forcefully.
“Ah, yes the other thing. You finally believe me then?” he asks.
“Unfortunately, yes, it does appear that you were right,” I say, holding back the tears of betrayal. “I apologize for not believing you.”
He shrugs. “And what do you plan on doing about it?” he asks somewhat slyly.
“I am going to kick his arse and then never see him again!” I exclaim with gusto.
“Ah, not so forgiving then. Yet you came here to rescue him. Bargained with me to take him back. Baffling.” He smiles.
“He is still my sire. I still love him; I just can’t forgive him. Now shut it and give me your hands.”
He takes my hands in his. “What exactly are we doing?”
“I am offering you my energy to see how it affects you,” I say.
He narrows his eyes at me, but he pulls on my energy anyway. I am going to have to find something to feed from myself soon and this is not helping, but I will do it anyway. “Do you feel any different?”
“Yes,” he breathes. “It is incredible, but it only works from your Dragon side. You see. It is pointless.”
“Why?”
“Because I cannot get to the Dragon Realms and I don’t exactly see Tiamat sending over a bunch of Her subjects just so I can walk the Earth full time.”
“Then use me.” I shrug.
“No, I cannot sustain this from just you alone. It will kill you,” he says.
“Aww, you really don’t want me dead anymore. So sweet. And by the way, I don’t die easily. If at all, in fact,” I point out.
“Everyone dies,” he says. “There is always a way.”
“Gee, doom and gloom much?”
“Thank you for your offer, but it is impractical.” He averts his eyes.
“So is your wanting to take me into a world of dreams,” I say.
“Not for me,” he sighs.
“Very well. I will find a way to make this happen.”
“Will you still give me my seven days with you? I have been looking forward to it all day,” he sulks.
“I gave you my word. But no funny business,” I say.
“What is funny business?” he asks.
“No turning into Fraser or trying to get into my pants. Again. It’s creepy. Even more so now I know we are related.” I shudder at the thought.
“I told you we are not related. And even if you insist on making the Tiamat connection, we are distant relatives at best,” he scoffs.
“Distant relatives is still relatives,” I point out.
“But you don’t let that bother you with young Xane,” he points out and I gulp.
“His lineage is so far below mine; it is but a speck on the horizon. A speck that you can’t even see without one of those space telescope thingies. You, on the other hand, have a very clear title of ‘grandnephew.’ Even if you were born two thousand years before me, there’s no getting away from it.”
“Why are you so stubborn?” he asks.
“Why are you so creepy?” I retort.
He laughs loudly. “Fine, you win. No Fraser and no roll in the hay. Refuse a starving man a meal, see if I care.”
“You are incorrigible. Go find yourself a nice little ghost girl to ease your needs,” I say to him.
He laughs again and says, “Any words you want to pass on to your entourage before I go?”
I shake my head and say, “No, I’ll do it myself.”
He nods and vanishes without another word, leaving a single red rose in his place. I pick it up and lean back again and sigh. One more thing to add to my “to-do” list: Save Remiel. Formerly out to kill him before he killed me, but now he needs saving. Oh, joy. How do I get myself into these situations?
Chapter 5
Buckinghamshire, England, March 2013 – Cole
He wakes up with his hand wrapped around himself. He often finds he wakes up this way when she isn’t here, in this big bed all alone. He hates it. He hates her being gone. He wishes there was a way that she could always be here with him. Just him. He is aching for her. It hurts, but he can’t tell her. She will feel bad and try to arrange to stay with him. That will lead to more bargaining and yet more secret promises that she has to make to him. Cole hates him. He hates him more than he hates being alone. He tolerates him in her presence, as no doubt Constantine does to him, but on the rare occasions they are alone, their mutual hatred shines through.
Fuck, he misses her. The ache gets worse as he thinks about her. It is this ache that caused him to nearly end up in bed with Tanya on Tuesday night. He wanted to do it, to fuck her so that the ache would ease, but also out of spite. He knew what Liv was doing. He didn’t have to think very hard on that and it pushed him to the brink of doing it. But he didn’t. He couldn’t. And that is why he is now in bed alone with his dick in his hand.
Thinking about his wife now, he strokes himself. He is already so hard it doesn’t take much to get him going. He thinks of her golden hair that falls to brush her nipples when she is naked. Her mischievous green eyes that hold a million promises, her luscious red lips the color of cherries. Ah, cherries. Her blood tastes just like them. Oh, fuck, her blood. He can feel his balls tighten and he comes with a soft moan that he smothers in the pillow as he spurts out all over her side of the bed. It still smells like her. That mix of lavender and J’adore perfume. Fuck, he misses her.
He groans in frustration and rubs his hands over his face. Why does she have to be so stubborn? Why couldn’t she just let them bring her back?
He glances at the clock; it’s only midnight. He has been asleep for an hour. He’s not even that tired. He always ends up in bed at her time even when she isn’t here. It’s ridiculous. God, he loves her. He loves her completely as his sire and he would do anything for her. He does do anything for her. He puts up with all of her demands because the alternative is too hard to think about. But he is in love with her as a woman, as his wife. She is so strong, and he likes that. He loves that she could kick his ass into next week, it is a major turn-on. So sexy. But when she is vulnerable and he can take care of her, that he loves even more. It makes him feel powerful and useful. This feeling of being inadequate around her is the only downside to being turned. If he could just embrace the life that she keeps harping on about, multiple lovers like she does, maybe it will make things easier. He has no shortage of women throwing themselves at him. He didn’t even before she turned him, but now he has to fight them off with a stick.
She doesn’t know, he has never told her that he could have fucked about a thousand times on her, but he just can’t do it. He thinks of his ex, Carolyn. She has been trying to contact him recently, although he hasn’t returned her calls. She looks like Liv, only not quite so beautiful. They had been together for a while when he had met Liv on that red carpet, and it was serious, but he knew it was over with her the second Liv smiled at him. Sure, he stayed on with her until the day after his first date with Liv, just in case. No point in burning bridges, but he called her the second he had a moment to himself to end it. He had never put much stock in love at first sight, but man oh man, did he fall like a lunatic for Liv that night. It was like it was meant to be just like in his dreams. He couldn’t even wait until the next day to call her. He just wanted to hear her voice again.
He sighs.
He is still torn in knots over the sex party. He didn’t go there to fuck the girl. He wanted to feed from her and watch his wife with her and then take Liv as the girl wat
ched. She made him do it, as ridiculous as that sounds, but once again he fell under her spell and did as she wanted him to do.
He closes his eyes to try and get back to sleep, but it doesn’t work. He can only see her beautiful face, and with an impatient sigh he gets up. He pulls on a pair of sweats and sits back down on the bed. He never slept naked before he met her. Now it is just the norm. It’s easier to take her in the middle of the night without clothes getting in the way. Every night that they lie in the same bed together, he just wants her. He watches her sleep and then he has to have her. Sometimes she doesn’t even wake up completely as she lies on her side while he thrusts inside her. As twisted as that sounds, he likes it.
He likes her helpless when he takes her. Fuck, he is such a pervert. She has turned him into a selfish, control-less pervert who fucks his wife while she’s half asleep. He stands up, disgusted with himself and pulls open the door. He needs to move and he’s thirsty. He wants cold water. That helps with the cravings. Liv uses wine and Scotch as her crutch, but he finds that cold water works for him. He wishes she would give in to her cravings. He would feel less bad about it if she did. He hasn’t drained a human since the other day on the Hunt and he probably won’t again until she accepts it. She says she has, but he knows that she hasn’t. In typical Liv fashion, they talked about it until she decided the subject was closed and that was the end of it. He loves that woman, but man, she can be so selfish. He doesn’t know if it is her age or that she is his sire or if that is just the way she is. He hopes it is her age. He doesn’t like to think of her as being that way naturally.
Mind you, the little he knows of her human years, he doubts she was anything but. It must have been that arrogant prick that made her that way. He doesn’t give a damn about anything or anyone except her. He would probably shoot his own mother in the face if she stood in his way. Makes Cole wonder then what Constantine was like as a human. Probably exactly as he is now.
He blinks and realizes he has been standing in the doorway with his thoughts. He moves forward and comes face to face with Jess as she creeps out of Devon’s room.
“Hey,” she starts in surprise as she sees him.