by Joss Ware
When he shifted around nearer and the light caught more of his face, she bit her lip. He was not happy.
“You said you weren’t going out tonight,” he said again. His voice was low and hard.
She swallowed and began to allow her own anger to replace nervousness and apprehension. “I changed my mind. I’m an adult. I’m allowed to do that.”
He’d moved closer, one arm coming out and blocking her from going any further as he rested his palm against the door. That pissed her off even more, and she demanded, “What do you think you’re doing?” She could have ducked under or gone around, but dammit, she wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction.
“You can’t go out there,” he said. “Selena.”
“I have to.”
“You don’t have to do anything.” Then his voice changed, sounding a little broken as he continued, “Especially by yourself.” He stood upright, his arm falling away. “Remember what happened last time?”
She snorted. “How could I forget. It’s part of the chance I take. And so far, I’ve only come away with a few cuts and scratches.”
“I hardly call this” —he reached out and shifted the neckline of her shirt aside— “a few scratches.”
His fingers brushed gently against her skin and she became aware of how close he’d moved. Close enough that she felt his warmth in the cool night air. And that his bare foot touched her shoe. And that he wasn’t wearing a shirt. That his skin and hair smelled clean and a bit damp.
Selena swallowed. She looked up at him and found his gaze fastened on hers, strong and steady.
“Ruuuu-uuuthhh. Arrrleeyyyyyyy-aaaaaanee.”
The horrible moaning sound wafted through the night, and she broke the stare, turning away and looking at the tall wall as if she could see through it.
She didn’t want to go out there, but they drew her—called to her. The crystal around her neck felt heavy and hot. If she didn’t save them, who would?
Give me a reason to stay.
“Not tonight,” he murmured, reaching to brush away a strand of hair that had fallen from her ponytail.
Her heart pounded so violently, she thought it must reverberate through each of her limbs. Her belly churned with indecision, with need versus desire versus fear . . . versus guilt. She thrust it all away, focusing on the words Wayren had said to her long ago: It is a gift, and a responsibility. Then she reached with a heavy hand for the door’s latch.
“No,” Theo said, taking her fingers and pulling her toward him. He wasn’t rough or even fast; it was almost as if it was in slow motion . . . and suddenly she was up against that bare, warm chest. “Not tonight. Stay with me tonight.”
Without waiting for her to respond, he bent to kiss her and she lifted her mouth to meet his.
Give me a reason.
This was the reason, she told herself, sinking into the kiss. There will be other nights, she told herself. I can’t save them all. And the cold shiver of duty turned to a swell of heat as his hands spread to cover her back, to hold her close. His fingers slid into her hair, loosening it from the tie, slipping along her shoulders and over the special, heavy shirt she wore for protection.
Beneath it, her taut nipples were rubbing against the heavy, soft plastic material, and the sensation was irritating and erotic at the same time.
“My place,” he murmured, lifting her into his arms, “or yours?”
He curled her protectively against his bare chest and she closed out the sounds of the zombies beyond the walls, calling and moaning and searching, as she burrowed her face into his neck. “Whichever is closer,” she murmured into warm skin.
He walked rapidly, the rhythm of his footsteps easy and soothing, and Selena rested against him—contented, awakened, and determined. “I thought,” she said quietly against his ear as he slipped them into the house, “that you were going to stay away from me for a while.” And she bit the edge of his earlobe.
His hold tightened around her as he walked quickly through the kitchen and, to her surprise, toward the back staircase that led to the arcade. “That was my intent,” he said. “But you blew that all to hell earlier tonight. Do you know how long I spent in a freezing shower after that?”
He took the steps with ease, the rhythmic jolting of the climb lodging her against him as they ascended. She started to say Are you going to hate me in the morning? as a joke, but a pang of guilt slashed through her and she shoved the thought away.
She wanted this.
She didn’t want to be out there.
Theo had first accosted Selena filled with anger and fear, but it gradually subsided as he recognized the indecision in her expression and demeanor—and then the softness. He wanted to erase that worry, that hesitance from her face. She did too much.
Now, as he mounted the stairs to the arcade with her in his arms, those emotions gave way to the less virtuous ones of anticipation and pleasure.
As they came through the mocked-up boarded door, he let Selena’s feet slide gently to the ground, enjoying the feel of her body moving along his. He was secure that he had her now, that she wouldn’t be slipping away to go beyond the gates. At least for tonight.
And then he put all thoughts of zombies and Brad Blizek aside as drew her close, began to unbutton the heavy shirt she wore. It was stiff and slick, and he got the sense it was made from plastic or some other artificial material. Immediately, he found the long thin cord with the heavy crystal pendant still encased in its small pouch. Before she could be reminded of it, he slipped the cord over her head and flung it to the floor, then parted her shirt. Beneath, her breasts were free and their nipples tight and inviting. He made a low sound in the back of his throat when he looked at them, framed by moonlight and the glow from random computer monitors.
“What was I thinking?” he said, sliding his hands beneath to gently lift and cup them. The size of generous apples, each a perfect teardrop shape, maybe a bit longer than they’d been when she was younger, but just right to him. Just right. Her nipples were hard and dark and when he stroked a thumb over one of them, she arched closer to his palms.
“About what?” Her voice was unsteady and low, sending a ripple of desire shooting through him.
Selena didn’t waste time; her hands were already tugging down the loose shorts he’d pulled on after his shower. He kicked them away when they slid down to his ankles, his body bumping against her jeans and naked, warm belly.
“Denying myself this,” he replied, his hands smoothing up over the tops of her breasts and back down to her torso. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”
Her shirt fell next, and then her jeans—he gave a mental nod of relief in the back of his mind that she at least had dressed properly for her nocturnal excursion—and then stopped thinking about anything but the curvy, golden body he had in his hands.
There were many sofas and large armchairs in the arcade, but Theo tugged her toward the wheeled desk chair and sat down, pulling her to stand between his legs. The moonlight silvered her skin and shone behind the fullness of her hair, and he held her wrists to each side, positioning her in front of him so he could just look for a minute. Eat her with his eyes, and trace the curve of her hips, the swell of her breasts, and the delicate lines of collarbone, throat, shoulders.
“Theo,” she said with an embarrassed little laugh, and moved toward him. All at once, she was sliding those sleek thighs over his legs, straddling his hips, settling herself right on his lap. He throbbed and strained when her heat bumped up against him, when she sidled her warm skin and fascinating curves against his torso, trapping his hard-on against her stomach.
“No hurry,” he said, his voice thick even to his ears, burying his face into her heavy, sweet hair as he nibbled on her neck. But he jolted when she slipped her hand between their bodies and began to trickle her fingers through the wiry hair below, lifting and stroking his balls. He closed his eyes, letting her play as he lost himself in the scent of her skin and the texture of warm, soft wom
an. Oh, yes.
When he had enough, when he was getting too impatient to wait any longer, Theo shifted and brought her back to him for a strong, deep kiss. He moved his hand down between them, finding her beautifully swollen and slick. A stab of lust shot through him. Pulling himself back from the edge, he kissed her again, unable to keep from smiling into her mouth as he realized how good this was. And he teased her as she’d done to him, moving his hand between them where she straddled his hips, open and slick and ready.
She shifted back a bit, trying to catch her breath as he took his time, watching her face tighten and her mouth open in little panting gasps. His desire rose, driven there by the expression on her face, the little sounds of pleasure, the musky scent of woman. The light behind shadowed her, so he only caught glimpses of her heavy eyelids and the curve of her cheekbone, her face tilted to the ceiling as she arched back, held in place by one of his arms as he made her tremble and sigh in front of him.
Her torso was bare and in full view and he enjoyed it as her breasts shifted and her nipples were pointed and taut, outlined by the light from the monitor behind him. Bending forward, he licked one, sliding his tongue long and flat around it, around and around and around it. She sighed and shook, her fingers clamped onto his shoulders, the pain of her nails battling with his own pleasure.
He wanted to taste her, to touch her, to be inside her and to see her face blossom into ecstasy. And he was ready. Hard and turbulent and ready.
She seemed to sense that, and before he tipped her over the edge with his teasing fingers, Selena opened her eyes and gave him a look of readiness and demand. Without hesitation, she rose and then impaled herself, over and down.
Theo exhaled sharply as pleasure surged through him. Oh . . . yessss . . . She moved and he moved and the world started to turn red and spiraled and suddenly he felt her convulse around him, shuddering and making that soft little sound of pleasure that made him want to come right then too.
He closed his eyes, waiting for the intense moment to pass, willing his body not to move. And before he could change his mind, he shifted and quickly dislodged her. Selena’s eyes opened and he answered her unspoken question with a quick, fast kiss as he stood, carrying her.
“We’re going to do this my way this time,” he managed to say, his arms filled with a naked bundle of satisfied woman.
Before she could react, he shoved a couple keyboards out of the way and sat her pretty ass right on the counter near his workstation. She squeaked at the temperature of the cold table, clutching at his shoulders.
That would be a good memory, he thought, as he settled in front of her, hard and slick and ready to finish this up.
Then he stopped cold. Jesus.
“What?” she said, her eyes opening when he started to release her.
“I have to get a condom,” he said, thinking how much he hated this world after the Change, which in turn, helped pull him back from the precipice. The condoms they had now were little more than animal intestines: bulky, thick, and loose. He had managed to acquire a couple of them from the guys in Yellow Mountain. And they were on the other side of the damned room, buried somewhere where Vonnie or Sam wouldn’t see them.
“A condom? What the hell are you talking about? You’ve got everything you need right here,” she said, wrapping her hand around him. And tugging.
Oh. Shit.
He staggered and she stroked him again, hard and without mercy, and the world started to turn red and spirally again, and he tried to think clearly, but she was pulling him closer, and wrapping her legs around his waist.
“Baby,” he managed to say as she fit him into place. And he groaned in relief and pain as Selena lifted herself off the desk and slammed against him. Deep and thorough.
“I told . . . you,” she sighed as she got him to moving with her. “I’m . . . too old . . . to . . . oh!”
His vision blazed bright red and he let himself go, holding her hips, ignoring the scores of her nails gouging his skin as she rocked against him, still shuddering and moaning as he gave one last thrust and shot home.
Theo sagged against her, resting his cheek on the top of her head, holding her close as his hands fit between her ass and the desk. Her legs still locked around him, they loosened their hold as she withdrew her nails from the imprints on his shoulders.
He realized dimly that he was going to be hiding more wounds over the next few days. No shirtless weeding in the hot sun.
Finally, he lifted his head and began to pull away. Their hot, damp skin stuck in places, and it was a relief to separate so that the little breeze from the open window could cool them.
“Wow,” she said, still sitting there on the desk, propped up and back on her palms. Naked, curvy, gilt with moonlight, hair tumbled over her shoulders and rumpled around her face. His mouth dried at the sight.
Yes, would be a very nice memory when he was working.
“I agree,” he said, leaning forward to kiss her again—an easy, sensual thank you and yes there will be more of this kiss—in gentle movements over her lips followed by a tender nibble.
“But next time,” she said, sliding off the table with a fascinating jounce of breasts, “don’t stop in the middle of it to talk about planning for a family.”
He gave a short laugh. “I’m not irresponsible in that way, but geez, Selena, you make me forget what I’m doing.”
“So do you,” she said softly, glancing toward the window. Her expression changed, but it was too dark to see clearly how.
Was it regret? Remorse?
Theo pushed away his own niggle of guilt. She’d nearly died last time. If she’d gone out alone tonight . . . if she’d gone out even with him . . . anything could have happened. He’d seen the way those creatures fought and clawed to get to her . . . Why?
Why does she do it?
I don’t want anything to happen to you—he couldn’t say the words. Instead he pulled her close and tried to show her, aware that something great and fearsome was opening up inside him. After a moment, when he felt her shiver from the little breeze coming through the window, he stepped back and offered her one of his shirts. In the last week, he’d taken over the arcade as his living space, spending a lot of time there. Only problem was, it got really hot during the day unless he opened all the windows and let the breeze rush through. Now, in the middle of the night, it was almost chilly.
She pulled the shirt on and Theo gently tugged her over to the large, wide sofa he’d claimed as his bed and covered with sheets and blankets. “Come here,” he said. “Stay with me?”
Selena smiled and patted the sheet. “I don’t know. I thought you were keeping me at arm’s length so I didn’t wear you out.” She tossed him a slanted grin.
“Let’s see who wears who out,” he said as his own insides gave a little jerk of interest. He reached for her and she fell onto the couch bed, dragging him with her.
But instead of diving into another long, hot embrace, Theo lay next to her, propped up on his elbow. He just wanted to look at her for a minute; and with a long forefinger, he gently traced a line down from the curve of her collarbone, down around her wrinkling areola, and along the curve of her torso. Settling his hand, palm flat on her thigh, he caught her gaze.
She was watching him; and in the dark he could see only that her gaze was fastened on him, that it was heavy and strong. He leaned forward and kissed her gently on the mouth.
“Tell me about Sage,” she said.
Out of the fucking blue.
Theo gave a little laugh, feeling very light. He hadn’t thought about Sage in ages. “Nothing like a mood killer,” he joked.
“Is it? I wondered,” she said. Her eyelids fluttered a bit, and he realized he’d better clarify.
“I don’t mean—well, it’s a mood killer because it was just the two of us, and now there’s someone else here. It wouldn’t have mattered who. You know? I was enjoying being with you. Just you.”
“Did she hurt you badly?”
“I’m sorry,” Selena said.
“Well, if it had worked out,” Theo reminded her, “I wouldn’t be here with you now. And there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” He realized as he said it that, not only was it true, but that he didn’t think it would ever change. That wanting to be with her, that level of comfort and connection. The intelligent conversations. Wanting to have his hands and mouth all over her rich, golden body.
She smiled and reached over to touch his cheek. “Thank you. You know, I don’t know very much about you, Theo. You seem to have as many secrets as I do.”
You have no idea.
He wondered about telling her more about what happened during the Change, but pride made him hesitate. Couldn’t she accept him for who he was, regardless of what she assumed was his age?
“Have you ever been married, then?” she asked.
“No. Never.” He’d always thought he’d have time—before the Change. And since then, he’d been trying too hard to figure out who the hell he was, why he was resurrected and altered, to think about sharing that life with someone else. And then there’d been the two or three years when the only woman in his mind was Sage, worshiped from afar, as she was.
“You must have children, though.”
A wry smile shifted his mouth. “No, can’t say that I do. Though it’s not from lack of trying,” he added with a full-fledged grin.
“What?” she exclaimed. She sounded truly horrified and actually shifted away.
“I’m kidding. Really, I’m kidding,” he stressed, still grinning, cupping her shoulder to bring her back. “I’ve been careful not to let that happen.”
“Some people would say that was morally wrong,” Selena said a moment later, when she’d obviously decided to believe him. “Preventing pregnancy when we need to reestablish our race.”