by Dez Burke
She reached the bar and let herself in. Once inside she locked the door and took in the hazy darkness of the bar. The plate that they had half shared was still sitting on the bar. Walking over, she grabbed it and carried it into the kitchen. Washing it quickly, she dried it and put it away.
Yawning, she walked into the office and sat down on the cot in the back. On the office desk was the gift from Alden. She still hadn’t opened it. Yawning widely again she laid down. She needed to rest just a few minutes. Her father could wait an hour. She wasn’t going to last much longer without some sleep. She curled up on the cot in the quiet darkness of the bar.
There was a mosquito in her ear. She swatted at it and tried to roll over, but it kept buzzing, flying around her head. She opened her sleep crusted eyes, confused. Realizing it was her phone she answered without checking it.
“Hello?” she said, still half asleep, slowly remembering that she was in the bar.
“Did I wake you?” Alden’s voice was full of concern.
“Yeah…” she said slowly, awareness coming back to her in bits and pieces.
“I’m sorry. I thought you would be awake by now.”
She pulled herself into a sitting position. “We’re not all on military time,” she said, rubbing her eyes.
“Nice, it’s three in the afternoon.”
She pulled the phone back from her ear and checked the time. “Fuck!”
“Nice! Is something wrong?”
“Uh, no. I just overslept. Can I call you back? I have to take care of something.” She didn’t wait for his answer. She jumped up from the bed and grabbed an old knapsack from under the cot. She rushed out of the office completely forgetting about package from Alden.
She grabbed a bottle of liquor from behind the bar without looking at it and shoved it in the bag. She slipped out of the bar and hustled the eight blocks back to her the apartment.
She opened the door slowly. Slipping inside, she was immediately on edge. Her phone was in her bag, buzzing like a bee against her thigh. It was Alden. She knew without looking. But she didn’t answer, couldn’t answer. Not now. She had something more urgent to attend to.
“Dad?” she called out sheepishly.
There was a groan from the kitchen. She walked towards the back of the apartment to what was left of her once clean kitchen. Every dish had been broken, every pot pulled from the cabinets. And there, head down on the table was her father. She pulled the bottle out of her bag and placed it on the table next to him. He looked up at her and grabbed it with a trembling hand. She put the bag down and started sweeping up the broken plates.
Her father stood up, taking his prize with him to the living room without saying a word. Later he would ask her for money and she would give it to him and then maybe he would disappear for a few days or maybe not.
This was her life. Not Alden. Not those glimmering moments of safety and contentment in his arms. Those were all lies.
Her phone went off every few minutes. She didn’t look at it. She simply swept up the porcelain shards and put away the pots. It took her an hour to finish cleaning. When the kitchen was complete she picked up the bag and walked back to her bedroom.
Shutting and locking the door behind her she half dragged herself to the bed and pulled out her phone. Alden had called her eight times. There were voice-mails that she didn’t have the heart to listen to. She closed her eyes and thought about how to best handle this. Clearly her life couldn’t just stop for him or even for herself. But she wanted him.
God, how she wanted this man!
Her phone vibrated in her hand. “Hello?” she said in a rush.
“What’s the matter with you?”
It was Tanya. “Nothing. Are you calling in again for the night?”
“No, wasn’t planning to. Aren’t you going to open? I was just there and everything is all locked up.”
Nice’s eyes opened wide as she turned to the clock. It was after five. “Oh shit!” she mumbled to herself.
“What?” Tanya asked.
“Nothing.” After a deep breath, she continued. “No, we’re not opening tonight. There’s been a family emergency.”
“Oh yeah, right, emergency. I’m sure. Whatever. You need to check your Dad into rehab, Nice. He’s dragging you down.”
“Thanks Tanya for that advice. Feel free to mind your own fucking business.” The words slipped out of her mouth before she could stop them. She held her breath for a moment, waiting for her answer.
“Whatever you say boss. Have a good night.”
The line went dead in her ear and she let the air out in a stream. She put the phone down on the bed curling into a tight ball.
If he calls I’ll tell him I can’t see him again.
The phone began buzzing. She picked it up and answered without looking. “Hello?”
“Nice! Are you alright?” It was Alden.
“I’m sorry. I had to take care of something. Alden, I-”
“Are you alright? I don’t care about what came up, I need to know that you’re okay right now!” His voice was almost frantic on the other line. “Something’s not right.”
“I’m fine,” she answered softly.
“You don’t sound fine.”
She closed her eyes tight. “I’m not,” she finally said, letting the words escape, letting herself finally admit to someone else what she felt.
His voice was soft. “Where are you? I’m coming to get you.”
“Alden, no. I have to stay here, there’s some things I need to take care of. I can’t leave. You don’t understand.”
“Where are you?” he asked again.
“Why? I’ll be fine. Okay?”
“Because I NEED to see you!” he exploded. She was silent listening to the sound of his breathing. “Please, Nice. I’m really worried.”
“You can’t come here. I’ll meet you.”
“Where?” His voice was urgent.
“There’s a park, umm four blocks away from the bar. It’s not very big. If you follow the trail there’s a gazebo in the center. I’ll meet you there.”
“Fine. I’m on my way there now.”
“Wait! Give me forty-five minutes. I need to shower.”
“I’ll wait for you then.”
“Okay. I’ll see you soon,”
She hung up the phone and rolled out of bed to get ready.
***
Alden looked up as she approached. He stepped out of the gazebo and watched her walk towards him along the path. She noticed he was leaning heavily on the cane. “You look very beautiful,” he said in a low voice.
Nice looked down at herself. Her hair was pushed back with a headband. She’d quickly slipped on a light green dress that fell a little above mid thigh with thin straps and a ruffle across her chest. “Oh, thank you. It was quick so I didn’t have much time to get dressed.”
He nodded.
“Alden, look, I told you that first night that I couldn’t do this.”
He nodded again, remembering her words. “I didn’t expect this either,” he said motioning between them. “But I want it now. After that night, I wanted you.”
She shook her head. “You didn’t know me. You don’t know anything about me now.”
He traveled the space between them, closing the distance until he stood directly in front of her, inches away. “I may not know much about you. But I know what I feel.”
“I can’t do this Alden! My life is such a mess and you-”
He reached for her hand.
“Tell me you don’t want to see me anymore,” he said softly.
“Alden, you’re not being fair,” she whispered, turning away so he couldn’t see the tears threatening to fall.
He let go of her hand and pushed her face back towards him, forcing her to look into his eyes. “Look me in the eyes and tell me.”
His eyes were focused on her in the half darkness. She could feel the tension in his hand against her face. Placing her own hand on his chest, she
felt his heart beating quickly under her fingertips.
Just for today. What will it hurt to pretend for today?
Doubt raged in her core, but she bridged the gap between them anyway and threw her arms around his neck. He responded in kind, wrapping his own arms around her. The cane pressed against her back while he kissed the top of her head and stroked her hair.
“You’re staying with me tonight,” he said. She nodded. “Come on,” he said, releasing her and grabbing her hand.
“No,” she replied simply, refusing to move.
He turned back to her, she couldn’t see the look on his face but she could feel it. She shook her head. “I’m not going with you until you tell me who you are and why you weren’t here sooner. Why it took you three years to get here, to me.”
He pushed his hair back from his forehead and pointed to the gazebo. They walked into the structure, letting the humid darkness swallow them up. She sat, ankles crossed, on the bench to one side. Alden moved to sit next to her, but she shook her head and pointed to the other side. He nodded and sat, the weak light shining from behind her, casting away some of the shadows from his face. His green eyes stood out under his glistening brow.
He looked at her for a long moment before speaking. “You haven’t opened that gift I gave you yet, have you?”
She shook her head. “No, will it spoil? It’s not like cookies or something is it?”
He shook his head a small across his lips. “No, but you should open it when you get a chance. What exactly do you want to know?”
“Your name. Where you’re from. Just normal things.”
He nodded, “My name is Alden. Alden Thomas. I was born and raised in a small town in Maine, joined the military when I was nineteen. I was medically discharged when I was twenty-four for this,” he said motioning to his leg. “And now I run my parent’s business.”
“Do you have any brothers or sisters? Are your parents alive?”
He shook his head. “No, I’m an only child. So my parents, who are still alive, were pretty upset when I went to war. Devastated when I was injured. Now they’re just concerned the family name will die with me.”
She scrunched up her nose. “Why would they be worried about that?”
He laughed. “For one, I’m a crippled hermit who only goes on dates when his parents fix him up and two I think they’re worried that all my parts don’t exactly work after…” He waved his hand at his leg.
She laughed. “It looked like everything was in place last time I saw it.”
He smiled, his teeth a bright white in the darkness. “Yeah, nothing’s missing, but I was paralyzed, waist down, for almost a year.”
“Oh!”
His voice was so soft she almost couldn’t hear him. “It’s why I didn’t come sooner, Nice. I had surgeries and physical therapy. A lot of surgery. A lot of physical therapy. They didn’t think I would ever walk again.”
“I’m so sorry,” she said, at a loss for words.
“No! Don’t be sorry. Not you. I didn’t lose anything. Your brother lost his life.” His tone was urgent.
“It was an accident,” she said, wanting to reach out to him, to comfort him.
He hung his head. “One that could’ve been avoided. By me.”
“All accidents can be avoided. That’s why they’re called accidents.”
A heavy silence hung between them. “How did you survive the accident? They said my brother died pretty much instantly.”
He nodded. “He did. We had a deal. If anything happened to either of us we would make sure the other’s family was okay. So he agreed to check in on my Mom and Dad and I would look after you.”
“Look after me? I’m an adult,” she said, feeling somewhat insulted. “I’m the one that’s been taking care of all of this,” she reminded him, spinning her finger around in the air.
He shook his head. “You don’t understand. My parents are adults too, but this wasn’t just about, you know, helping you. It’s about making sure they’re not alone. Sam wanted to make sure you’re not alone.” He leaned forward, reaching for her.
She put her hands up to ward him off and he sat back, defeated. “So that’s why all this is happening. I’m just a debt to you.”
“No! No, that’s not why this is happening! I don’t know why this is happening. We each just wanted to make sure that there was someone out there that they could call on Christmas. To check in with. What I feel for you, it’s not that.”
“You don’t want to call me on Christmas?”
“No, I want to be with you on Christmas.” His statement was simple.
“You don’t even know me, really. I’m just a face in a crowded bar.”
He shook his head. “That night in the club? I had no idea you were the person I was here to see. You had on way too much makeup and that dress was downright trashy.”
“Hey!” She started to protest and he held up his finger to stop her.
“But you didn’t carry yourself like you were wearing a trashy dress. And I could see the real you underneath all of that. You were so sure but so unsure at the same time. And when I kissed you it was like I had never kissed anyone before.”
He stood awkwardly and came over to where she sat. He sat next to her, wrapping his arms around her in one fluid motion. She brushed her fingertips over his sweaty brow, “You’re hot. Can’t get used to the Southern heat huh?”
He nodded, and then kissed her. She opened her mouth for him without being prompted. He sighed and she bent into him, his hands trailing over her skin, slipping under the edge of skirt to feel her bare thigh then higher over her hip. She moaned against him, her fingers gripping his shirt.
She ended the kiss, rubbing her nose against his.
“Now tell me about yourself. Tell me whatever you think I need to know to make it alright for me to feel like this,” he said. “But, not here. Maybe somewhere with air conditioning?”
Before she could answer her stomach growled loudly, causing him to laugh. “And somewhere to eat for you. Have you eaten at all today?”
She ran through her day quickly. “No,” she said sheepishly. “There wasn’t time.”
He stood and held his hand out, helping her to her feet. “Come on then, tell me where to go.”
She smiled and they left the gazebo together hand in hand.
Chapter Five
The first five minutes of the car ride to the restaurant was spent arguing over the radio. After a heated discussion regarding who was actually in charge and what the other could stand to listen to they finally settled on the local pop station. Nice rolled her eyes and made gagging noises in her throat. Alden laughed. “This was the agreement!”
The cold air-conditioning blasted against her skin. She shivered slightly and rubbed her hands over her arm. Alden reached over and touched her bare thigh. “Too cold?”
Heat shot through her, radiating from his fingers to her center. He ran his hand over her leg slowly, keeping his eyes on the road. She shivered more from his touch than the cold this time. “It’s a bit chilly in here for me.”
He nodded and moved his hand away to turn the air down. She immediately missed his touch. “Where are we headed?” he asked.
“To a Chinese place,” she said, reaching forward and changing the channel on the radio.
He smiled down at her hand before grabbing it and kissing her knuckles, “Do you really want that? We’ll go wherever you want. What’s your favorite place?”
“We’re already driving! And I don’t know. I don’t really eat out much.”
“Well there has to be somewhere you want to go.”
She shook her head. “No, I’ve never really thought about it. Never had time to think about things like that. Always been too busy taking care of Dad and the bar.”
His hand returned to her thigh. “Then I’ll pick. We’re not getting Chinese.”
“Where then?”
“It’s a surprise,” he said, looking at her out of the corner of h
is eye. Her stomach grumbled again. “Don’t worry it’s not far.”
Half an hour later they were pulling into a large parking lot. “This place? This is your surprise? Somehow I was expecting something a little different.”
He grinned. “What’s the matter? Don’t you like games?”
She looked out the window at The Arena, a multilevel game-filled complex. She had been there only once, just out of high school but not since. She slipped out of the car into the heavy night air. Alden met her on her side of the car and reached for her hand.
“This is our first date. I’m going to buy you dinner and then I’m going to attempt to win enough tickets to get you a stupid stuffed animal,” he whispered into her ear.
She looked up into his smiling face. His green eyes were alight with mischief. “The last time I was here, I went bowling,” she said, looking back at the building.
He started walking. “We can do that. I’m afraid I’m not very good. But,” he turned to her. “I would love to watch you play. I can keep score.”
She felt the heat of a blush run up her cheeks. Damn it! She was always forgetting about his leg. Shaking it off she asked, “How did you even know about this place?”
“Found it when I was looking for somewhere to have a drink the other night, but I thought it was a little rowdy for my mood.”
She giggled. “So you went to the gayest of gay bars instead?”
He smiled. “I thought it would look a little less, I don’t know, strange? To be a lonely guy sitting at a bar.”
She tilted her head. “You would have fit in perfectly at my bar. Why didn’t you come there?”
“I knew where your place was and meeting you was exactly what I was trying to avoid until I was ready.” He held the door open for her letting her hand go as she slipped inside.
“And look how well that turned out for you,” she replied.
They settled on the fancier of the five restaurants inside of the building. The tables were topped with white tablecloths and candles. Alden pulled her chair out for her before sitting down himself. They ordered quickly and then were left alone.
“So, what do you want to know about me?” Nice asked.
“Normal stuff,” Alden answered, smiling.