by Dez Burke
John knew beforehand that there would be no impromptu wedding vows. All rural Jamaicans were traditional. You would never see them writing their own vows. Everything was done according to their own traditions. He asked them to repeat the vows that guided them into a life of harmony, after which cheers erupted when they were asked to kiss.
The crowd dispersed to the tent after the ceremony in order to give the couple privacy to sign their documents. Soup was being served outside and the music started playing. Lou Rawls, Dionne Warwick, Luther Vandross, Nat King Cole, and many other favorites were played on a stereo.
The cake Mrs. Cameron made was beautiful and was placed on a table outside. The bride and groom came out to cheers from the crowd and took their seats at the small table prepared for them. They were the first to be served and they ate hungrily. Robert was a big eater and hadn’t eaten anything all day. He had been so busy that he totally forgot to have breakfast or lunch.
The fun was just about to start when there a gallop sounded in the distance. The people paid it little mind, since they knew some horses were in the nearby pasture. However, soon the hoof beats sounded much nearer that they thought, and Brother Thomas’ wild mule suddenly came charging through the yard. Mrs. Chambers was standing near the cake and just barely had time to snatch if from the table before the mule came charging at them.
Everyone ran and screamed, as they were all scared of him. He knocked over quite a few tables and a couple of the white tablecloths got hooked onto one of his hoofs. He dragged them behind him like a second tail. Just when they thought that everything was okay, the mule came charging through again, this time in chase of a dog. Not only was it chasing the dog, but some chickens, which were spooked by the whole thing were all over the place, flying around flapping their wings. Everyone scurried around, trying not to get chicken feathers in the food!
It was close to half hour before things seemed calm enough to resume. Brother Thomas had to go in pursuit of his animal, which trampled a few flower beds and ruined a couple of chicken coups.
The children were the ones having the most fun in all this. There were squeals of excitement, especially when the chickens got away. As soon as the mule took off, they started trying to catch the chickens.
“Wow, what a day!” John said to Robert.
“You don’t see nuttin’ yet!” Robert replied in a fit of laughter, not about the events but his pastor’s expression. There was shock and disbelief written all over John’s face.
John hadn’t seen Chevaine all day, ever since the ceremony inside the house. He wondered where she had gone off to. He wasn’t sure what was going on with her. He thought maybe she felt guilty about what transpired between them. He wanted to ask her, but thought that his bringing it up again would just open another can of worms and he wasn’t prepared for any more heart ache.
As he was about to leave, he saw her talking to a tall fellow he had never seen. The man was quite good looking and well-groomed in a dark suit. They stood outside the gate away from everyone and seemed to be getting along quite well. His heart dropped at the thought of her maybe falling for someone else. He had to mentally chide himself for his jealousy. As he approached, she looked at him with such sadness in her eyes that his heart broke.
“Hello,” he greeted the couple.
“Hi,” Chevaine greeted thinly.
“Hello, Pastor, it’s nice to finally meet you,” the young man said, stretching his hand out for a handshake.
“Nice to meet you, too.” The handshake was firm but on closer inspection, John realized that the man could be no more than seventeen or eighteen. He was just a boy who grew too much.
“This is one of my former students now attending high school in Kingston,” Chevaine told John, who inwardly felt like an idiot.
Out of politeness, he stood a few minutes to talk to the young man, asking where he went to school and what he planned to do when he graduated. The boy told him he wanted to pursue law and that it was Chevaine who had inspired him to do well for he was an idle boy who used to skip school. John chided himself for being jealous earlier.
Chapter Five
It was December and the temperature had gotten really low, or at least what passed for low in Jamaica. Being so elevated, Cotton Tree Hill was brisk this time of year. In the morning, there were low lying fog and you could feel the wind blowing in from across the Atlantic. Sweaters were worn in the evenings and blankets covered chilled bodies to keep them warm at night.
John was used to this temperature, since it was practically Canada’s version of summer weather, so it didn’t bother him at all. He probably was the only one who went about without a sweater or slept without a blanket in Cotton Tree Hill.
It was close to Christmas and the people were getting their best ducks, chickens, and pigs ready for the season’s festivities. John was looking forward to spending his first Christmas in Jamaica and anticipated the festivities. He had nearly a dozen invitations to dinner, including at the Cameron’s home. He remembered that the first meal he ate on the island was at their home and he thought it would have been impolite to decline since the Camerons took care of him for the first few weeks after his arrival.
Before long, it was Christmas Eve. Most of the young people were planning on going to the city. Shopping was done early but Christmas Eve was a celebration in itself. It was a time to buy any extras that may be needed and to party all night.
He was invited to the city by a small group who would be going with Robert. Others would have to walk a mile or so to the bus stop to get transportation, but to them it was worth it.
As they entered the city of Kingston, John saw the streets lined with lights. Trees of every kind were decorated with colored or white lights. The shop fronts were bright and beautiful. He felt a bit homesick as he remembered his own Christmas lights.
Some of the major streets were cordoned off so that vendors could sell their merchandise. They would be there until Christmas morning, accommodating the last-minute shoppers. The young people weren’t the real spenders, since their main objective was to have fun. The event was a tradition of the island known as grand market. Children frolicked about eating candy while adults enjoyed liquor and jerk chicken.
For the first time in over a month, John felt something like excitement brewing inside him. The atmosphere was frothy with Christmas spirit, and it was infectious. He had spent the last month wondering where he went wrong or what really happened. He had never been in love before nor had he ever asked anyone to marry him, though he knew it was expected of him someday. He always thought that when the right woman came along he would be able to tell, but now he wasn’t so sure.
Now, all he felt was an ache where his heart was supposed to be. He just assumed that maybe God had a bigger plan in store for him or maybe this was some lesson he needed to learn. Now, on Christmas Eve, his relationship with God was renewed as he silently prayed for direction and guidance in matters of the heart.
He bought a few gifts for individuals. Upon reaching a jewelry store, his eyes caught a beautiful necklace and on impulse he walked in, but as he was about to make the purchase he realized that under the circumstances it would not be appropriate. He walked out and into an appliance store where he bought a juice extractor instead. There was nothing John wanted more than to be able to give Chevaine a gift, not just because he loved her but because she deserved it. Instead, he decided on a family gift. John bought something for the church and what he needed to complete his gift to the people of Cotton Tree Hill.
John left Kingston feeling renewed. Though broken-hearted, he was not a broken man. His faith in God gave him new strength to face whatever laid ahead for him.
Meanwhile, in Cotton Tree Hill, Chevaine helped her mother prepare Christmas dinner. The ham was in the oven, the large roaster marinated in the refrigerator, the sweet potatoes were peeled and ready to make candied potatoes. The two women now concentrated on making the traditional Christmas pudding.
“Chevai
ne?” Mrs. Cameron called to her daughter. She had been very concerned for her lately but she was certain that marrying a complete stranger she’d only known for a few months was not the best thing for her daughter. She only wanted what was best for her. What if they marry and he decided to move back to Canada and take her with him, or worse, he decided to leave her here, breaking her heart? What if he already had a wife in Canada? Nobody really knew this man. These were all the thoughts flying around in Mrs. Cameron’s head.
“Yes, Mommy?” Chevaine replied questioningly.
“Are you sure you are okay with Pastor coming to dinner later?” she asked softly. They were standing pretty close together. Chevaine was sifting flour while her mother creamed butter and sugar for the cake, doing so by hand.
“I’m okay, Mommy, everything will be just fine.”
Chevaine decided to leave everything in God’s hands. In her heart, she knew John was the man God had provided for her so she silently prayed for her mother’s eyes to open to the truth.
She knew her mom only wanted what was best for her and she respected that. She was taught to always obey her parents but more importantly she was taught to have faith in God and believe that whatever happened what for her own good. As the Bible said, “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose.”
“I’m sure glad to hear that. I love you, you know that,” her mom added.
Chevaine rested her head on her mother’s shoulder and replied, “I know, Mommy, and I’m fine.” She badly wanted to tell her mom how much she was hurting but restrained herself, not wanting her mother to feel more guilt than she was already feeling.
Her father had asked her to give her mother some time to come around to the idea and that’s exactly what she was doing. She secretly hoped for a Christmas miracle and that the New Year would bring more happiness.
Christmas morning was beautiful. The people were up and about before sun up and John could smell the wonderful food from every house. Church service was only an hour long, held at five o’clock and it seemed that all the community came out.
He presented the church with a well-needed clock for the building which would be finished in a few months. For the people of the town, he gave them a plot he had secretly bought from Brother Thomas to be made into a public park. Everyone was very pleased with the gifts and they all brought gifts of their own. There was Christmas cake, wine, sorrel, baskets of food, a sweater, a blender, and lots of cards. He felt right at home. He spent most of the day visiting folks who had invited him to their houses. The last stop would be dinner at the Cameron’s house and John had no idea what to expect.
Dinner was a success, or so it would seem, for John seemed quite relaxed, Chevaine observed. It was John who did most of the talking, telling them about his childhood and family traditions. He told them how he, his siblings, and parents would drive to a tree lot to pick out the Christmas tree and bring it home in his father’s pickup truck. They would all decorate the tree and his father would place the angel on top.
He was surprised that the people of Cotton Tree Hill did not have Christmas trees. Mrs. Cameron told him that decorating Christmas trees was not a Jamaican tradition but was adopted in recent years. Trees were now sold in the city and people from the upper-class would buy them for their homes.
John also told them about Thanksgiving but Mr. and Mrs. Cameron had never heard of it. That’s when Chevaine joined the conversation to explain to her parents this tradition of the outside world they knew so little about.
It was the first time John was having sorrel, which he loved very much though he missed his apple cider and fireplace. After dinner, the Cameron’s surprised him with a mug of eggnog made just the way he was used to back home. To accompany the eggnog was a yule log cake and Christmas cookies, which made his homesickness lessen a bit. It was Chevaine’s idea to give him a little piece of his home which he left behind. Even though she could not be with him, she wanted him to be happy.
John wasn’t sure what to make of Christmas dinner, which only served to confuse him. He swore he saw love and adoration in Chevaine’s eyes whenever he caught her looking at him. He was even more confused as to why she refused to marry him. Was she scared? Was it her parents? No, he thought. Her parents seemed to care for him very much. They were loving and warm to him. That couldn’t be it, he thought. He came to the conclusion that Chevaine was scared and that’s why she said no to his proposal, and this gave him a glimmer of hope.
He spent the next few weeks planning his next move, rethinking his decision to stay away from her. However, each time he got an idea to approach her, she would seem more withdrawn. At times she seemed quite aloof, and this would throw him off guard. With that, he decided to wait for a signal from her.
Chevaine wasn’t quite in the same spirits as John for she never got her Christmas miracle. As far as she was concerned, her mother would never approved of her marrying him and with each passing day her heart broke even more. Deep down she had hoped that Christmas dinner would provide a miracle and her mom would see John for the wonderful man he was. That didn’t happen, for when she asked her mother what she thought she was still adamant about them not getting married.
She could feel herself becoming withdrawn from everything but it seemed that there was nothing she could do about it. She tried to act normal, but what she was trying to show on the outside was not happening on the inside. It became so difficult that she found it quite painful to go to the church office.
It was during the week leading up to the planned baptismal service that Chevaine made an announcement that would shock John.
“Pastor, I have something to tell you,” she began quietly. A little hope blossomed in John’s heart that maybe she had changed her mind. They were in the office discussing the final details of the coming week when she told him she would no longer be able to fill the capacity of church secretary. “I will be resuming full-time teaching and doing extra lessons in the afternoons. There is no way I can do both,” she announced.
“When will this be?” he heard himself ask.
“After the baptism,” she informed him. “That soon?” he almost blurted out.
John could not believe it, as he never imagined her not being there. This was her brainchild. She was the one who had written to his mother church in Canada. She was the reason he was here. He could not picture the office without her and wondered what he would do without her being there.
As if to answer his question, she told him, “There is a young lady who just graduated from high school. She would really benefit from the experience here.”
‘Are you sure this is what you want?” he had to ask, more for his sake than anything else. Maybe this was his sign. Instead of getting closer they were growing apart, he thought. “Maybe this is a sign that maybe it wasn’t meant to be,” his heart said.
“I’m sure,” she stated. She just could not bring herself to tell him that she could no longer stand being around him because it was much too painful.
“I am really sorry you are leaving, but if that’s what you really want then I’m happy for you.” John’s voice had grown hoarse as he tried to swallow the lump that rose to his throat. He had to turn away to hide the pain that crossed his face. It was as if his entire world came crashing to his feet. All the plans that he had made to start courting her officially were for nothing.
The plan was to access the trust fund that his parents had left him in order to buy a vehicle so he could take her on real dates. He wanted to prove his love to her, for he thought for sure that she was only scared. He thought that Christmas with her family was a real sign that she loved him, but now he knew she only wanted to get away from him.
***
It was cold and it seemed not such a good idea to have baptism in January but the people thought it would have been bad luck to postpone. John had a hard time explaining to them that faith in God had nothing to do with luck and nothing ba
d would happen if they postponed.
These people were set in there ways of superstition. They believed it was bad luck to postpone a wedding, or it was bad luck to go back inside the house if you were on your way to conduct important business. If you forgot something, you just had to leave it.
Since almost all the people except for a dozen or so who were baptized in other churches elsewhere were to be baptized, it was supposed to be an all-day event. The fun day was back on, but in the form of a crusade to be held on the church grounds. The building was almost done except for the roof and flooring, but once again a tent was placed in the yard so if it rained everything would be okay.
The actual event would take place at the river then they would all sing and march to the church where the candidates would change their wet clothing and proceed to the tent where live music and singing would be happening.
In order for there to be no interruptions, such as what happened at Susan’s wedding, the wild mule was caught and secured far away from the proceedings. Among the people to be baptized were Robert, Susan, and Gregory. Chevaine was already baptized in a city church, so it was not necessary for her to do it again, though somehow she felt she needed it in order to heal.
Standing by the river to the back of the joyful crowd, her eyes welled with tears as her heart felt such turmoil she could not understand. Something was happening to her and she fought to seek answers. She felt so alone there with her people. No one paid her any mind, for most people were crying tears of joy. Her tears were thought to be the same.
One by one, Pastor John McCrary baptized the brethren by the river as they sang songs of repentance and joy with tambourines and cymbals while dancing and praising God. John resolved himself to his situation. He was a man of God with a mission and he could not be distracted on this day with his own issues. That morning he vowed to, at least for the day, not think about himself, but the people who would be depending on him to submerge them under water as a symbol of their faith.