And I would have, in a heartbeat. But I still appreciated it more than I could say, at least in front of other people. “Thanks, Linc.”
He winked. “You gave me your breakfast. What else was I supposed to do?”
Greene and Mr. Sheldon both fought grins. “Now, I have a proposal for you, Miss Hall.” He paused. “If you’re uncomfortable continuing your classes, I can arrange to have you trained out of the classrooms next Phase. I believe Mr. Sheldon could arrange your Demonology assignments, as I understand you set your own pace there as it stands. And I believe I could have Peter Holt or one of the other agents work with you for your other courses. They’re all very taken with you, it seems.”
I didn’t answer immediately. The idea had appeal. A lot of appeal. I could train, by myself, without having to worry about Rachel and Eric hounding me for breathing the wrong way. But, as I looked to Linc, I realized that would cut into our time.
And if I went with that idea, wasn’t that letting Rachel and Eric win? Wouldn’t that just prove that they’d gotten to me?
I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction.
I let out a sigh and brushed my fingers through my hair. “Thanks for the offer. Really. But I’m not letting them scare me away. I came here for a reason and I’m not letting them get in the way of it.”
Greene seemed pleased with my answer. “As I said, you’re a lot stronger than they realize. Much stronger, it seems, than even I gave you credit for.” He nodded, though it seemed to be more to himself than me. “Very well. Mr. Sheldon, please keep me apprised of this situation when classes resume. Feel free to send students to my office if you deem their behavior toward Miss Hall inappropriate. It won’t be tolerated.” He turned so he was facing Linc and Mr. Sheldon. “I know it’s your classroom, but would you two mind giving us a moment, please?”
“Sure, Director,” Mr. Sheldon said. He and Linc both nodded and then stepped outside.
“Miss Hall, I’m aware of your fight with Rachel Clarkson.”
I winced. And here’s the other shoe. “I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have reacted that way, and if you want to suspend me, I understand and—”
Greene held up his hand. “I know you’re sorry. I said before that I didn’t give you any preferential treatment, and I did mean that for the most part. But it wasn’t the complete truth. Were you any other student, I likely would have, at the very least, suspended you for a week. But you remain a vital part of the CGE and I believe you’ll continue to be. You can change lives here, Jade. Not just because of the research we’re conducting, but because of your character. I’ve asked a lot of you since you’ve joined, but I fear I have to ask more of you.”
I didn’t groan or sigh, though I wanted to do both. “Yeah?”
“Whether the other Prospects realize it or not, they need a leader. More, they need a good leader. And I don’t mean myself, or the teachers, or even the other hunters. We aren’t people they can look up to now and they need that. They need someone their age, someone who understands the responsibility they’ve been given, someone who can set an example for them. I need you, and Mr. Stone and Miss Monroe, to be that example.”
“I don’t think I’m the best person to ask. Linc and Tasha are—”
“Great students as well. But you’re smart and capable, kind and caring. You’re just learning about yourself and your abilities—and yes,” he added, seeing me wince, “I know you’re uncomfortable with that term but it’s suiting. Many of those today, even the ones who mocked and ridiculed you for a part of yourself didn’t ask for, are going to be faced with those feelings. Some may not want the treatments during their fourth Phase, but I believe a lot of them will.”
“Right now, none of them particularly like me.”
“That’s not true. I think they do like you, but I also believe they’re envious of you, regardless of what they say. You’ll prove yourself to them without even trying to, because that’s who you are. That’s the type of person you are. You were born to lead, Jade.” He smiled down at me. “I don’t want their attitude toward you to affect you or your attitude toward your goal. You’ll continue to work harder than anyone else here, and that’s going to set an example. Even if they continue to dislike you or be envious of your accomplishments, they’ll work harder to prove themselves to you.”
“I’m not sure what you want me to do,” I said honestly.
“I just want you to continue to be yourself.” There was a slight pause and the stern lines of his face eased into a small smile. “And, more, I’m asking you to hold your punches.”
*~*~*
Long after my talk with Greene, I found myself sitting on the catwalk alone. Linc had wanted to join me, and part of me wanted him to, but I just needed a few minutes alone to decompress. The last week had been…difficult, I thought with a laugh. Not quite as bad as last Phase, but it was, in its own way, worse. The whole vampire death-scare had been, well, scary. But at least last Phase I’d only had a few enemies. Even the people who didn’t know me well hadn’t exactly liked me, but neither had they actively disliked me. Now… Now it seemed like everyone had a problem with me. Everyone knew my business.
Greene had questioned my resolve to stay and I hadn’t even needed a second to consider it. I’d just spoken the truth, that I wasn’t going to quit because of them. And I wasn’t changing my mind, but I wondered how I would deal with it over the summer, and especially next Phase. I could just stay in my room like I was now, studying, working on the DD if they let me. But I needed time out, too. Then again, if I locked myself in my room, Linc would probably be there and we could just make out in between studying.
The thought made me grin. Linc was great, and while I didn’t think he’d have any problems with make out sessions, he’d still want me to leave my room.
Sighing, I climbed down from the catwalk and went back inside the building. I had the whole summer to worry about what’d I do next Phase. For now, I wanted to go spend some time with Linc.
When I made a turn at the end of the hall for the elevator, my shoulder collided with someone. Immediately, I winced and prepared for…something. A fight, probably. I stopped and glanced over my shoulder. One of the P1s—the girl who’d found me on the first day of the Phase, Shelly Young—was looking at me like I was going to chomp her head off or something. And here’s another instance where Tasha is right. They are looking at me like I’m a piranha pariah. “You okay?” I asked, pushing down my annoyance at the stare.
The girl’s head bobbed up and down.
When she didn’t say anything, just kept giving me the crazy look, I wanted to tell her to knock it off. That’s great role model material, Jade. Instead, I sighed. “Sorry I ran into you, Shelly.”
Her expression changed gradually, from distrust to something else I couldn’t place. Finally, she took a deep breath, like she was preparing to do something scary, and said, “You look sad.”
“I—” I almost snapped at her again, I thought, annoyed with myself. “Yeah, I guess I am a little.” I’d wanted to lie, to say I was just fine, but those weren’t the words that tumbled out of my mouth.
She looked down at her feet. “Is it true what everyone is saying?”
I struggled not to sigh when she wouldn’t meet my gaze. She was acting skittish, nervous, like she was afraid I’d slap her away at any second. “Which part?” I asked wryly. I was sure there were more than a few rumors going around about me. Unfortunately, I wasn’t sure all of them were fake.
“That you’re part demon,” she said, lifting her head for point two seconds, “and that you can talk to them?”
“Yup, that’s me. Jade Hall, the Demon Whisperer.” Shelly’s eyes went wide and I shook my head. “Yes, I’m part demon. As for the other thing… No, not really. I can’t talk to them.” I paused, considered. “Well, technically, I suppose I can talk to them, but it doesn’t mean I understand them or that they understand or listen to me.” Really, I had asked one demon not to attack me�
�the baby—and it hadn’t, but that was only because I wasn’t very threatening toward it.
That was my excuse and I was sticking to it.
Considering I’d had four different demon species either attack me or try, and of those four species, only had one actually listen to me, I wasn’t counting that as being able to communicate with them. That’d just been some weird fluke.
“And is it true that you punched that Rachel girl?”
“Yeah. I shouldn’t have, but I did.”
The girl nodded. “Maybe you shouldn’t have,” she started, her eyes narrowing, “but I’m glad you did. She’s a troll.”
My jaw dropped open and I just blinked at her. It took me a full ten seconds before I responded, and even then, all I could do was laugh at first. “Thanks,” I said, wiping tears from my cheeks. “I needed that.”
She grinned at me. “She really is. She’s trying to get all the P1s to avoid you. I had been.” Her tone went shy. “But you don’t seem very demon-like.”
Only on the inside, chick, I thought. “I’m not. I just have…some of their perks, I guess.”
“A few of the other girls I hang out with were talking about you. Sorry,” she added quickly, “nothing bad, really, we were just talking about whether we’d want the…the treatment things. Most of us said no.”
“Well, you don’t have to get them if you don’t want to. You have a choice.”
She glanced at me, then away again. “If you weren’t already—I mean, if you didn’t have them…oh, never mind.”
I chuckled. “If I didn’t have the treatments already…what?”
“Would you still get them?”
“Yeah. If it meant it’d make me better at hunting, then absolutely.” Now that she’d mentioned it, I wondered if I’d be able to get more. I didn’t necessarily want or need more (how many types of DNA could one person really hold?), but I wondered if it were even possible. Greene had always mentioned treatments, like plural. But I didn’t know if he meant it as in more than one or just in general. Another thing to worry about next Phase. Or Phase 4.
“Is it painful?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. Mine were…handed down, I guess. But I could ask one of the hunters, if you want. Now I’m kind of curious about it myself.” Were they painful? No one had ever said, and I’d never thought about asking that, either. I’d have to track Peter down, or maybe Adam. Adam owed me one for that stupid Demon Whisperer nickname. “I’ll find out and let you know.”
“Thanks, Jade.”
“No problem, Shelly. Anyway, I’m gonna go meet my friend. I’ll see you around, okay?”
She nodded. “Sure thing. Bye!”
I turned to walk away and heard her call my name. Smiling, I twisted back. The smile fell as Shelly’s fist collided with my jaw. I stumbled back, crashing into the wall even as I grabbed my jaw. I knew it was probably just my imagination, but I swear red tinted my vision.
She smiled at me. It wasn’t sweet or shy or nervous anymore, but cold and hard. “Rachel sends her regards.”
I was stunned. Not by the blow itself, but the fact that it’d happened. The fact that this girl, a P1, one who I’d thought was actually almost sweet, had hit me. For Rachel. My fingers curled into fists, clenching so hard I could feel my nails biting into the palms of my hands like angry thorns. I worked my jaw to the side but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to say anything. Everything in me wanted to hit her back, hard, then find Rachel and hit her again. “That’s her free one. Tell her I hope it was worth it,” I said, taking a step toward Shelly. “As for you…”
Her chin jutted out stubbornly. “What are you going to do? Hit me, too? You don’t scare me.”
“I shouldn’t scare you. But Director Greene should.”
She actually had the gull to look hurt by that. “But—you can’t tell him! She said you wouldn’t!”
“Why not? You. Hit. Me.”
“For Rachel!”
“And Rachel can damn well take care of herself!” Which raised a good question. If Rachel had really wanted to get me back, why would she have sent some P1 to do it for her? She didn’t seem like the type to do that. Not when I was sure she’d love to punch me herself.
It reminded me of Jennifer from The Pond. She’d gotten on Sharon’s bad side (one of the other girls who practically ran the house), and in order to make it up to her, Sharon had told Jennifer to attack me. And then it made sense, too much sense. I shook my head. “The way I see it, one of two things just happened. One, you did it as some kind of initiation thing to join Rachel’s group. Maybe she wanted you to prove yourself or something.” When that didn’t seem to be it, I added, “Or maybe you got on her bad side, and she said she’d make your life a living hell unless you hit me.” Her eyes went wide, telling me I found my answer. “You got played.”
“What? No, I didn’t!”
“No? Why do you think she sent you? Are you that dumb, or are you just that desperate to fit in that you’ll do something you should know will get you suspended, if not kicked out?”
“But she said you wouldn’t tell anyone…”
“Odds are, she either figured I’d hit you back, or she figured I’d tell Greene and get you suspended. Either way, she gets some revenge. On both of us.”
What a sad, sad situation. If I told Greene, she would get suspended, I was sure of it. It was her word against Rachel’s, so I wasn’t sure what would happen to Rachel—if anything. Part of me really wanted to tell Greene. I hadn’t last Phase, or this Phase, actually, and what had that gotten me? A whole hell of a lot of trouble.
“Are you really going to tell him?”
“That you hit me? I should. Why shouldn’t I? And if you say because Rachel said I wouldn’t, I’ll do it just because you annoyed me.”
“Because—because…” She sighed and didn’t say anything else for a full minute. “I guess I don’t really have a good reason.”
She looked miserable. Not just miserable, she looked terrified. But considering she’d fooled me just minutes ago, I wasn’t really buying it, even if I wanted to. Just tell Greene, you idiot.
“Please, don’t tell him. I’ll do anything you want! I can’t leave!”
“I don’t want anything from you,” I said softly.
“I’ll—I’ll hit Rachel back for you! Please, Jade.”
I just shook my head. “I don’t need you to hit Rachel. And if I don’t tell Greene, she probably will.” Or she’d do a heck of a lot worse and make Shelly hate being here. That, to me, would be worse than leaving. To be at the place you wanted to be, only to realize you hated it, or had something happen to make you hate it.
Her eyes watered and big, fat tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Fine, damnit.” I sighed. “I won’t tell Greene. But that doesn’t mean he won’t find out. He has eyes everywhere. And I mean that literally and figuratively. There are cameras in the classrooms, so they’re probably in the halls, too.”
“Oh, thank you, thank you!”
She started to run up to me, but I jumped out of the way. “You hit me again, and I’ll not only tell Greene, but I’ll deliver your unconscious body to him personally,” I warned. It was an empty threat.
Mostly.
Her eyes widened. “I was just going to… Never mind. I guess I’d be cautious, too.”
“You think?” I felt a little bit of sympathy for her (despite my better judgment), because Rachel had played her like a pro. But that didn’t mean I was going to trust her, and it sure as hell didn’t mean I had to be nice. Casting her one last, wary glance, I turned and walked away.
She didn’t follow, but she called out to me. “Where are you going?”
“To kick my own ass for not at least kicking yours.”
CHAPTER 22
Instead of going to find Linc like I’d planned, I went to my room to vent. I wished I had my mom to talk to, but I didn’t, so I decided to do the next best thing and write in my journal. It wasn’t even clo
se to talking to her, but sometimes it helped.
I grabbed out my journal and sat at my desk. For five minutes, I just tapped my pen against the pages, unsure of what I really wanted to say. “Just write,” I muttered to myself, and then I did just that.
Dear Journal,
Things…aren’t going so well. It seems like everyone is against me now. I can kinda see why, so that just makes everything worse.
I got punched in the face today for no good reason. It would’ve been an acceptable reason, except the puncher punched me for someone else, which made it totally stupid. I told said puncher that I wouldn’t tell on her but I’m wondering if that wasn’t a stupid idea. Guess time will tell.
And moving right along…
My demon DNA has been causing more problems than it’s helping—and it helps with a bunch of things. At least when it comes to hunting. But for socializing, it’s a real bitch. Everyone thinks I’m part demon, which, in a way, I kinda am, but it’s not like I asked for it. And it’s not like half of them won’t sign up for the genetic treatments themselves. So honestly, I’m kinda baffled.
I do well, and people seem to hate me. I do bad, and people still seem to hate me. It’s a stupid, stupid lose/lose situation.
Part of me really wants to leave, because I’ve been at a place where no one wants me around and it’s not fun—for me or anyone else. No one liked me at The Pond, but I hated being there anyway, so I was okay with the hatred everyone seemingly had for me. But I really like being here. I like what I’m doing and who I’m becoming. I’m stronger and faster than I was a year ago, or even six months ago. And okay, it wasn’t all fun and games. I mean, almost dying isn’t exactly fun, but I lived, didn’t I? It made me stronger. So for the most part, it was okay.
But now? Now…it’s not so okay. And maybe, in a way, it’s worse now than it was at The Pond, because I do like it here.
I don’t know. I’m not leaving. I told Greene I wasn’t planning on it, and I’m not. But it’s just hard thinking about the future. If today is bad, how is tomorrow going to be? I want to say better, because it’ll be a new day, but… I’m not quite that naive. Okay, I am, as my still-hurting jaw proves, but still. I don’t think tomorrow is going to be any better. I don’t think everyone is going to wake up and realize I’m not any different than I was when I first joined.
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