by Adriana Noir
Josh glanced over his shoulder, his gaze darting worriedly to the door. His tongue darted out to wet his lips. Unmoved by the man’s nervousness, Sebastian kept both voice and expression passive.
“I’m not going to shoot you, Josh. Not yet.”
The last two words hung between them. It was a chilling reassurance at best. His partner’s eyes drifted shut and his ragged exhale broke the silence as the meaning behind that statement settled over him.
“Look, I know how this must seem, Baas, and you’re right. I should have said something. I was just trying to bide my time and protect you. I was going to tell you Marx was there. I just wanted to wait until you cooled down.”
“I don’t need your protection. What I need is a partner that I can trust. I used to think I had that. Now, I’m no longer so certain that is the case.”
“Are you not listening to me? I was watching out for you! Jesus, Sebastian. I have always had your back! If I’d told you when it first happened, who knows what you would’ve done. I know you love her and all, but Taylor already has you and Marx ramming heads. The last thing anybody needs is for the shit between you two to escalate. Things are fucked up enough as it is.”
“Let me put it to you this way. I will do whatever it takes to keep her safe. She is my family, and I won’t let you or anyone else stand in my way. Seven years will go down the drain very quickly if you ever decide to cross me or lie to me again. Is that clear?”
“Baas, look…”
“I’m done talking.”
“This is exactly why I didn’t bring it up. Marx took those tapes because he knew you’d focus your energy on finding those men. Pull yourself together and stop throwing accusations around, Sebastian. Please. I know you have had a rough go of things lately. Between Laychee, Dominic, and Taylor’s accident, your head has to be spinning. I get that, but you can’t keep doing this. You have to let things go. Marx is already getting edgy and suspicious. Quit giving him reasons to retaliate against you.”
Turning back to the window, he let the familiar burn of anger wind through him. It was something he could cling to and trust. He hadn’t felt this powerless or cornered since he was a child. The newly resurrected emotions weren’t something he enjoyed. In fact, they scared the hell out of him. Staring across the expansive desert landscape, he kept his back turned and a watchful eye on Josh’s reflection as he spoke.
“Is it so hard for you to see that he already has, Josh? Whether he pulled the strings or not, Taylor’s accident is still a direct result of his actions. I recognized one of the men on those tapes. He is the same one who’d been following me when we were investigating Patrick James. All of this boils down to Marx’s actions and the direction he is choosing to take. Unless we do something, it is only going to get worse from here.”
“We aren’t doing anything. I’m not getting into this with you, Baas. If you really want to keep Taylor safe, back down and do your damn job. Let Marx worry about the rest. It’s that fucking simple.”
“Is it?” he asked softly. Turning, he confronted his partner with a questioning tilt of his head. “Where is this leading?”
“Who the hell cares? It’s not our place to question this shit and you know that. You do your job and let Marx do his.”
“You know he wants Taylor out of the picture, yet you tell me to trust him and believe that he will keep her safe? You’re asking me to let that man worry about my family’s wellbeing after he’s put four of them in the ground?” He shook his head as the corners of his mouth lifted into a sardonic hitch. “Forgive me for seeing the irony in those requests.”
Silence hung between them. Sebastian held his breath, hoping the man would offer some sort of response, some explanation he could cling to for reassurance. He needed to know he wasn’t alone in this. Seconds passed and his hope wavered. Squaring his shoulders, he returned to his desk and forced a stiff nod. The movement only accentuated the dull, burning ache that suffused his muscles and made them feel like molten lead. Disappointment settled cold and heavy in his chest. Nothing about this conversation convinced him Josh would take his side. All he had now was more doubt. More reservations, more darkness to cloud his horizon.
“We follow orders, Sebastian. That’s it. It’s cut and dry, buddy. I’m sure the guy knows what he’s doing, and I’m sure he has his reasons.”
Easing back into his seat, he returned his attention to his paperwork. “Thank you for the advice, Agent Reevers. If there is nothing else you wish to discuss, I have a briefing to prepare for.”
“Sebastian, come on. Don’t be like this. What’s really going on with you?”
“This conversation is finished. Shut the door on your way out.”
~*~*~*~
Taylor set aside the pamphlets she’d been reading. Hearing another voice rise from the backyard, she muted the television and listened. It wasn’t uncommon for the men to shout when they spotted movement in the woods. More often than not, it turned out to be an animal of some sort and no cause for alarm. Still, the memories of what happened when Laychee and his men broke in were still vivid and lingered all too real in her mind. Casting the lush throw blanket aside, she pushed to her feet, watching while a handful of men made their way to the front of the house. Retreating closer to the stairs off the kitchen, she listened as news of an approaching visitor filtered through the house. Her face twisted with a worried frown as Rupert disappeared from view. The list of people the security team knew and accepted was short. Judging from the guards’ reactions, whoever was outside wasn’t one of them.
Deciding to play it safe, she eased toward the base of the stairs where she’d be away from the windows and out of view. Her head cocked as she listened, her ears straining for any signs of trouble. Seconds ticked by, then what felt like a small eternity. Much to her relief, there were no raised voices filtering from outside, no pops of gunfire peppering the stillness. Just a long, unending silence. Pulling her cell phone free, she stroked the smooth plastic and waited.
Without warning, Rupert’s thick Southern drawl broke through the intercom, nearly startling her out of her skin.
“Sorry to bother you, Ma’am, but there’s a woman out here claiming to be your mother. She’s not on the list, but I was wondering if there was a message you would like to give?”
Her what?
The phone slid from her hands where it clattered against the rustic travertine floor. Numb, she watched the casing spin against the textured stones. A rush of emotions crashed over her in waves. Shock. Disbelief. Hope. All of them grappled, too fleeting to take hold. Then the questions set in and started tearing her apart.
How? How did her mother know where to find her and why? After so much time had passed without so much as a single phone call, why would she visit? Why now? Was this a cruel trick orchestrated by Marx? Was this one of the people Sebastian had warned her about or was this a just a sick twist of fate?
Hugging her knees, she clamped her eyes shut. It was too much to process, too much to wonder about or deal with. Rupert’s voice echoed through the house again, this time carrying a strong undercurrent of concern.
“Ma’am?”
Pulling herself together, Taylor pushed to her feet and made her way over to the intercom. Fighting the unsteady wobble in her legs, she braced a hand against the wall and struggled to find her voice. “I’m here.” Her tongue felt thick and swollen when she tried to wet her lips. She expelled a shaky breath and dragged a hand through her hair. “Could you please ask her what she’s doing here?”
Her lungs ached, burning, as she waited.
“Taylor? It’s me, honey. It’s your mom.”
She wanted to hear it. She tried, but she found no familiarity in the soft voice wafting through the speaker. Too much time had passed.
“Baby, I know I haven’t been good about keeping in touch with you and I’m so sorry for that. I really am, but I need to see you. I just want to talk to you and see you with my own eyes. Can you let me in? Can you do that fo
r me?”
Do that for her?
She blinked back the hurt and astonishment. After everything the woman had and, more importantly, hadn’t done—was she really standing there asking her for a favor? Who did that? She closed her eyes, resisting the urge to go to the window. Some secret part of her, a huge part, still felt the desperate yearning and unfulfilled ache of a child searching for their mother’s love. Seeing the woman would be too much. If she looked now, she wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to run to her and hold her. She would want to search and memorize every inch of her mother’s face, to see what lines and differences time had caused. She didn’t even know if she would recognize the woman staring back at her, and that simple truth was what hurt the most.
“Taylor, sweetie, just tell the men to let me in.”
She wanted to. God, did she want to—but given the circumstances, it wouldn’t be wise. There was only one decision she could make.
“I wish I could, but I can’t. Even if I asked them to, the guards wouldn’t listen. They have very specific instructions about who can be here when Sebastian isn’t home. If you really want to see me, you’re going to have to come back then.”
A long pause followed.
“Taylor, these men work for you. I know your words have to carry some weight with them.”
She almost laughed. Almost, but the heaviness in her chest made it feel like her heart was breaking. In spite of it all, she couldn’t help but feel a small surge of anger. Over the past few months, those men had stood by her and risked their lives for hers. They’d stood outside and been there for her every single day regardless of rain, snow, or shine. It was far more than the stranger outside the gates could claim.
“They are only trying to protect me and follow orders. I’m not about to put them in a position where they could lose their jobs. The head of security will give you my number. The next time you decide I’m worthy enough of your attention please…do us both a favor first and call.”
Numbing silence gripped the hall. Tears threatened, but she refused to let them fall. She would stay strong. She would do what Sebastian expected and err on the side of safety. No matter how tempting it was, she wouldn’t cave and, most of all, she would not peer outside, hoping to catch a glimpse of the woman who’d left her so far behind.
~*~*~*~
The federal agent standing next to him was a little broader and greyer than he had been several years ago, but he still had the same disarming smile. Jack Gill had always been one of the good guys, the man who played it nice while his partner stood by and ripped a person to shreds. Staring out across the lake, Sebastian prayed the same still held true. A cooling breeze swept over the water and he watched the small ripples gain momentum as they undulated across the surface. The sun was setting now, bathing the lake’s glassy surface with vivid strokes of red and gold. It would have been a picture perfect evening if not for the multitude of troubles weighing on his mind.
“Thank you for meeting me on such short notice,” he said, keeping his focus trained on the other side of the water.
“It’s not a problem, though I admit I was a bit surprised.”
“By my message or the delivery?” Sebastian asked.
Jack chortled quietly beneath his breath. “Both. I wasn’t expecting to hear from you and I certainly didn’t expect a note to be hand delivered to my office by a barmaid, nonetheless.”
“I remembered you were fond of her…and the bar.”
The other man laughed again, his head bobbing in an affable nod. Turning some, his countenance grew more serious. “I know your time is valuable, Sebastian. As is mine, so let’s cut to the chase. What do you have?”
“Dire problems and not enough time. You are right about my organization and where it is headed. I need you to understand something though, Jack,” he said, turning to face the man. “These aren’t my intentions, nor are they those of most of my men. I’m hard pressed to call any of us innocent, but you need to understand they have no choice. When it comes to Marx and his demands, you either follow through or you are dead.”
“Sounds like a rough road to travel, my friend.”
“It hasn’t been without rewards.”
The older agent’s features settled into one of grim determination as he pondered both statement and situation at hand. “What is it you are asking?”
“I need him out of the picture,” Sebastian confessed. “I can’t do this on my own. He knows he’s crossed the line. The only time he leaves headquarters is if we have a mission and he keeps himself heavily guarded at all times. Even if I could take him out, there’s no guarantee my men wouldn’t turn and retaliate against me or my family in return. Simply put, I need your help.”
Jack sighed and sloughed a hand across his face, his expression weary. “That’s a tall request, Agent Baas. I would be putting a helluva lot on the line, including resources and innocent lives.”
“This isn’t an option, Jack. It’s a necessity,” he stated crisply.
“I’ll agree with you on that.”
The man turned forward, facing the water. Reaching into the inside pocket of his blazer, he pulled out a pack of cigarettes, tapped one out, and lit it. After expelling a thick plume of smoke past his lips, he extended the pack Sebastian’s way.
“No thank you.”
The older agent brushed off the dismissal with a shrug, as if to say it was his loss. He pulled a long drag of tobacco into his lungs and rolled the glowing rim of ashes against the rail as he released his breath. The smoke rolled upward where it briefly shrouded him in a dense grey cloud before dissipating with the wind.
“What are you proposing?”
Sebastian sliced the air, redirecting the thick line of smoke that drifted his way. He cast a scowl in the other man’s direction, not bothering to keep his annoyance veiled. Smirking to himself, Jack shifted his arm.
“We’re scouting the grounds for a new operation this week. He will want to be there.”
The older gentleman nodded and a long pause stretched between them. “If I do this for you, Sebastian, you are going to have to give me something in return.”
“Name it.”
“We need Blue. We need to know this isn’t going to fall into the wrong hands again.”
He snorted, the reaction settling over him too quick for him to mask his disbelief. “Right. What makes you believe it would be safe with your agency?”
“Nothing,” Jack replied, swinging his warm brown gaze up to meet Sebastian’s. “Absolutely nothing. That program is too potent, too dangerous. It has to be destroyed.”
Some of the tightness gripping his body fled. He couldn’t agree more. There was only one problem. “We’ve been looking for Patrick James for months,” he admitted. “Marx has found loopholes. He’s been able to key into certain parts of the program, but he hasn’t been able to fully unlock it.”
“Patrick James is the only man who has the codes to disable Blue. Either find him or bring those codes to me, Sebastian. Those are the terms of my agreement.”
“Fine.”
“There is one more thing you need to do.”
“What’s that?” he asked, his voice dropping to a muted growl of annoyance. “I’m working with you here, Jack. I’m already putting my ass and my family on the line. Now’s not the time to get greedy.”
“I understand, but I need to know how many of your men are on board. If we attempt to take Marx out and fail, it’s going to ignite a full-blown war. Where will you and your team stand then?”
He leveled the man with a scathing look and straightened. “Where do you think? Do you want my advice here, Jack? Don’t fail. If you do, if Marx keeps going, it won’t matter how many of my men are on board because you, me, and the other ninety percent of the population will be dead. That is what we are facing. I will hold up my end. You will get what you are asking, but you had damn well better hold up yours.”
~*~*~*~
Taylor ignored Sebastian’s probing stare. Keep
ing her head lowered, she pushed the food around her plate, her stomach twisting in knots. She’d struggled with her thoughts for most of the evening, and she still hadn’t conjured up a way to approach her mother’s visit. Especially when he felt so tense and closed off. He didn’t seem angry, there was an electrical undercurrent, a latent sense of danger warning now was not a good time to test limits or push. She turned her attention from her lamb and glanced up as Sebastian set his fork down and leaned back in his chair. His steady gaze still drilled into her.
“Is dinner not to your liking?” he asked.
“No, it’s fine. It’s not that.”
Folding his arms across his chest, he waited. When no answer was forthcoming, his eyebrows crept lower in impatience. “Are you going to elaborate or do I have to keep prodding and waiting for you to explain?”
“I’m not trying to be difficult, Sebastian. I’m just trying to sort through stuff and figure out how I feel before I talk to you about it.”
His piercing green eyes narrowed even more. “Figure out how you are feeling about what? What aren’t you telling me, Taylor?”
She reached for his hand. He tensed, but didn’t pull away. Some of the anger hardening his features ebbed as she stroked her thumb over the powerful ridges of his knuckles.
“It’s not about you or us,” she assured him. “I’ve never questioned how I feel about you, Sebby.”
He seemed to doubt that. Tiny furrows gathered, creasing the space above the ridge of his nose. Frowning, he kept his attention fixed on her hand and nodded.
“My mother stopped by today.”
His head snapped up with enough speed and force to give most people whiplash. “What?”